Monogatari Series - Volume 24 - Chapter 2.31

031

It was my older sister, Hibari, who told me that none of this was normal.

My dad’s not normal, so he remarried with your abnormal mum, Kujaku-chan. My family – our family, it’s hopeless. We’re gonna grow up as soon as we can, and get out of this place.

Become adults, fast as we can.

And get outta this house.

That was all my sister, Hibari, said over and over again. It was like reciting a curse – a curse that was born from her heart.

But if big sis did not tell me any of it, I would have noticed that something was not normal by myself.

The thing mummy was not opsessed by was not things, but her own family and her own daughter.

Like how ice would melt into nothing.

That if she left things alone, her own daughter would go away, that was what mummy thought.

My new father told me this.

I cannot simply call him father.

Your dad is the only dad in the world, and you shouldn’t forget about him. You have to treasure your real dad dearly. You don’t need a new father to replace him. Think of me as an uncle living together with you.

I have no idea who my real father is. I asked mummy, but she never told me.

I can’t believe I have a daughter who asks me questions like this. Woe is me! I’m a truly miserable mother. She would say these words, and then she would start to cry.

Therefore, when someone mentions something about real fathers, for me, I have no clue as to what they are talking about. All I can be certain of is that this person does not want and has no desire to be my father at all.

He is an uncle, living together with us, he is.

But Hibari, she wanted to be an older sister to me, that was what she wanted to be.

My older sister.

She gave me pyjamas, she gave me a rubber, she taught me what shampoo is, she brushed my hair with something called a comb, she took me to the dentist. She had also given me a doll at some point, but mummy threw it away when she found out.

Later, I pretended to fall out with big sis in front of mummy and uncle who lives with us. To lie in front of grown-ups made me feel like a grown-up myself, and my heart was racing every time I lied to them about falling out with my sister.

Big sis Hibari helped me with studying too. Before that, I was not allowed to study for tests, because tests and examinations stopped me from a free imagination, but my big sister, she said to me that such a ban would only rob me of my ability to live alone. I hated studying. But, when my big sis started studying with me, I grew to like it over time.

Mummy later married the uncle who has been living with us (even though she always said marriage is an opsesshun too), because the uncle who has been living together with us is very rich (the uncle who has been living with us married mummy because mummy is pretty. I forgot to say that my mummy is a very beautiful woman).

But even with more money, the house did not end up with more things, and mummy only returned home even less than she did. The uncle who has been living with us did not feel like he was living with us as time passed. He became an uncle who stayed home from time to time. Sometimes, he would invite his friends from work, and he would call these friends his ‘family’. He would invite them over and drink with them in the living room. When that happens, he would throw myself and my big sis out.

I have big sis Hibari to take care of me. That is why unlike mummy, I never thought my life was miserable. It would be the opposite. I think that I am happy, and that the life I lead is a happy one. Being together with Hibari, it was fun when we were trying to live together. I felt happy when I am with my big sis.

However.

I did not think that was normal – I know full well that those days will come to an end.