Combatants Will Be Dispatched - Volume 4 - Chapter 5.3

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“We’re really flying, Boss! Look, look, there’s a supopocchi fighting a mokemoke over there! Let’s stop by on the way home, capture the one that loses, and boil it!” 

Excited by her first flight, Rose looks down at the ground and kicks up a fuss. 

“See, Six? This is how natives should react to superior technology. That’s the reaction I was looking for.” 

Apparently, this is what Lilith had in mind with her Lilithification plans, and she smiles contentedly. 

“…Hey, mind if I butt in? Isn’t that the Sky King or whatever?” 

Alice has been surveying our surroundings, and we look in the direction she’s pointing. 

“Yeah, that’s the Sky King. You know, at that size, I bet we wouldn’t go hungry for a long time…” 

“It’s supposed to be the Guardian Beast. Don’t eat it.” 

I make sure to quip to Rose after her disturbing remark, but… 

I can’t really tell from this distance, but it looks like someone on the ground is getting chased by the Sky King. 

Probably some idiot who raided the Sky King’s lair. 

We’re too far away to get a clear look at the poor soul being pursued, but there’s something familiar about that silhouette. 

“Yo, what’s going on, Six? You’re staring so intently into the distance.” 

“Well, it looks like the Sky King’s chasing someone or something… Should we go help?” 

If we weren’t in the middle of a mission, we could do a good deed in hopes of getting a reward. 

“…Unless you’ve stolen something important or are carrying something shiny, the Sky King won’t bother with you. And if you’ve stolen something, it’ll forgive you if you give it back. For shiny stuff, if you hide it under your clothes and hold it like it’s really important to you, it’ll eventually give up. If the Sky King is after somebody, it’s totally that person’s fault.” 

Rose’s unexpectedly harsh assessment convinces me to let the strangely familiar stranger go it alone. 

…And more importantly. 

“Hey, Ten. Um, I’ve been wondering since earlier, but are you using a controller from a game console to fly this plane?” 

“Oh yeah. This is the sort of controller I’m most comfortable with. I used my own points to order it. So long as I have this in hand, I’m one of the best pilots in the world.” 

Wow, one of the best in the world. That’s a lot of confidence. 

“Glad to hear that. We’re counting on you, Ten.” 

Alice approaches, her curiosity piqued by our exchange. 

“If I didn’t have to participate in the parachute drop, I’d do the piloting. Still, where’d you learn to fly like that? I know we’re not supposed to dig into someone’s past at Kisaragi, but I have to admit, I’m curious.” 

“Heh. It’d be better to talk about it after we’re home safe… Well, the long and the short of it is that I grew up with a unique family and had to teach myself how to fly a plane.” 

……? 

Wait, “a unique family”? What does that have to do with him teaching himself how to fly? 

…Wait, he taught himself ? 

“We’re approaching the drop zone. Looks like it’s my time to shine. Heh, I love a good challenge!” 

For some reason, rather than reassuring me, his confidence fills me with a sense of dread. 

“All right, is everyone set? We’re counting on you, Ten. Show us the skill that made you bravely volunteer when I took a shot in the dark and asked if anyone knew how to fly a plane… Everyone else, prepare for the drop!” 

As a structure that appears to be the Demon Lord’s Castle comes into view, tension begins building inside the plane. 

…As the cabin grows quiet, I have a question I really need to ask. 

“…Hey, Ten, I just can’t get over the fact that you’re using that game controller. You mentioned you taught yourself to fly… You don’t mean that you taught yourself by playing Lace Combat , do you?” 

I mean this as a joke, of course. 

I asked because I wanted to use this as an opening for him to tell me where he learned to fly. 

On average, most Combat Agents are dumb as dirt. 

I can’t shake the feeling there’s something odd about one of them having a genuine pilot’s license. 

Ten laughs at my suggestion, though, as if I made a particularly funny joke. 

Seeing his reaction, I relax a little. 

“Okay, my bad. That was a stupid thing to ask.” 

My apology elicits a thin smile and a shrug from Ten. 

“Yeah, no kidding. Who do you think I am? The first Lace Combat ? Are you crazy? …I learned from Lace Combat Final . That one had online matches and was really difficult. One time, I stole money from my sister’s piggy bank, spent it on in-game items, and wound up as one of the top ten players in the world.” 

“Everyone, put on your parachutes, quick! Alice, do you think you can take the controls for a bit?” 

“I can use my connector, but that’ll cause problems with the parachute drop. It’s safer to abandon this plane and get to the ground ASAP.” 

“Why’s everyone suddenly so panicked? Did something happen?” 

As the cabin becomes a beehive of activity, Rose alone remains calm. 

“I told you! I TOLD YOU! Combat Agents are all morons! If he had an actual license, he wouldn’t be a Combat Agent! That’d be obvious after thinking about it for a second ! Dammit!” 

“Calm down, Six. Leave this to me. With my trusty controller, I’m invincible. And I bought tons of prepaid cards to spend on in-game items, so there’s no problem here.” 

As soon as I hear that, I kick open the plane door. 

Lilith screams without a shred of hesitation: 

“Deploy parachutes—!” 

The Demon Lord’s Kingdom is a vast wasteland dotted with a number of small deserts. 

After landing in the middle of these vast wastelands… 

“Th-thought we were gonna die…! If Ten makes it home, he’s in for an earful!” 

Actually, thinking about it, how the hell did he take off using a game controller? 

“Is everyone safe? No one’s hurt?” 

“I’m okay! Actually, it was fun coming down from the sky!” 

“Obviously, I’m fine. If there was a problem, this area would have been wiped out by my reactor.” 

Lilith checks on everyone present, and it seems there aren’t any issues. 

In fact, the problem is we still have a long way to go until we get to the Demon Lord’s Castle. 

I don’t know where we landed exactly, but I do know we’re deep in demon territory, which means our options are to either head toward the Demon Lord’s Castle, vaguely visible in the distance, or decide the mission’s a wash and beat a retreat… 

Now on the ground, we can hear the distant sound of explosions in the background, probably from modern small-arms fire. Which must mean Tiger Man’s started his attack. 

“Alice, after confirming our current position, let’s move to the closest hill.” 

Unfazed by this setback, Lilith quickly gives further orders. 

“We’re north-northwest of the Demon Lord’s Castle. About fifteen klicks out. I’ve linked up with your satellite, Lady Lilith, but there aren’t any hills nearby. I have found a group of hostiles heading this way, though.” 

“Oh, dang it! The enemy’s already coming for us? Why did my perfect plan with layers and layers of schemes go wrong?” 

“I think it’s because you forgot to check Ten’s qualifications.” 

A rock flies at me in response to my accurate feedback. 

“Why does this always happen to me…? I mean, ordinarily, this is where my brilliant, brainy plan goes off without a hitch, allowing me to show off before canceling the widely hated order of dragging Six back to Earth, and then having everyone praise the wonders of Lilithification after I depart, isn’t it?” 

I’d like to think it’s because she doesn’t think things through enough on a day-to-day basis. 

……Wait. 

“Hey, Lady Lilith, what was that? Did you just say you’re going to cancel Six’s forced repatriation and leave him to continue serving as my partner?” 

“Yeah, that’s right! That’s what I said! I mean, what choice do I have?! If it was just the greedy knight or that clingy woman, I’d take him back in a heartbeat. But rather than the cross-dressing Chimera, it was Patrasche who swayed me. And she happens to be attached to Six and have a really heavy, tragic history. Of course I wouldn’t hesitate to follow through!” 

Hearing that, Alice stops moving. 

“…You know, I think about this a lot, but the Kisaragi Supreme Leaders are all tsundere , aren’t they?” 

“Shut up, Six! At the very least, I am not a tsundere ! I’m the honest and kind Lady Lilith!” 

Rose fidgets a bit, happily listening to them bicker. 

“I’m too dumb to get the full gist of what’s going on, but does this mean the boss and Miss Alice can stay together because I like the boss?” 

“Yes, that’s right. But remember that’s on my judgment alone! Hooray, Miss Chimera! When you get back to base, make sure you get Six and Alice to treat you to all sorts of goodies!” 

Lilith’s cheeks flush faintly. 

…What should I do with this tsundere boss? I guess it wouldn’t hurt for Alice and me to be a little nicer to her. 

Just as I’m thinking up a scheme and Alice is staring blankly at the sky, evidently lost in thought… 

“Mrrreow. Lady Lilith, do you copy? This is the Tigerrr Man Decoy Squad…over!” 

Tiger Man’s voice comes over Lilith’s radio receiver. 

“We’ve done a cerrrtain amount of damage to the Demon Lord’s Arrrmeow, but the Sand King suddenly appurrred on the battlefield. Our currrent weaponry is insufficient, so I’m rrreturning to the hideout. Furrrthermore, the Demon Lord’s Arrrmeow also retreated with the Sand King’s appurrrance, so there’s a high purrrobability you’ll encounterrr the enemy if you’re heading to the Demon Lord’s Castle. This mission is a failurrrre. I suggest immeowdiate rrretreat…meow. Over.” 

…… 

The painful report completely spoils the mood. 

Alice, who’s been staring upward, shakes her head and shrugs her shoulders. 

“…I guess I should’ve expected things to go south. Once Lady Lilith returns to Earth after having failed her mission, we’ll get Lady Astaroth or Lady Belial over here… Well, I guess it’s a win to have seen my creator be useful. The enemy units converging on this spot are probably the main forces of the Demon Lord’s Army. Lady Lilith, have them send us another plane. This is the time to make a hasty retreat.” 

…As Alice says, I guess we can call it a win to have seen Lilith’s soft side. 

“Rose, you heard her. It might be a bit dangerous, but we’re pulling back this time. Next time, we’ll plan better and return after making the proper preparations. It might take a while, but we’ll grant you your wish.” 

“A-all right! I mean, we tried to rush things too much this time, didn’t we? Anyway, I got plenty of information from the survey of the ruins, so I’m plenty satisfied!” 

As Rose smiles at my promise… 

“This is Lilith. Negative on retreat. We will continue the mission. Tiger Man, your unit is cleared to retreat to the hideout. The Sand King’s appearance was unexpected… No, actually, with the information at hand, I could’ve anticipated it. It’s my fault. Sorry. Thanks for your efforts. Head on home. Over and out.” 

Lilith completely kills the mood over the radio.