CHAPTER 3
Vs. the Mud King
1
It’s been three days since we got a sample of the Sky King’s droppings.
“Congratulations, Lady Lilith! You finally accomplished something on this planet.”
“Hold on. This isn’t my first accomplishment. I mean, I killed that giant lizard in the forest, remember? I also found that mysterious subterranean facility.”
Once they were treated with Alice’s specially developed pesticide, the formerly defenseless vegetables stopped attracting flying monsters.
Since there’s a limited number of those mysterious concrete structures around the kingdom, farming open land will allow for a substantial increase in food production.
Once the supply of vegetables and grains goes up, they can start raising larger domesticated animals.
Which means there won’t be a need to cannibalize sentient creatures that can speak human languages.
Even though I’ve tried to avoid it myself, I still can’t get over watching others eat orc meat.
I’m not a fan of critiquing the customs of others, but this is one food culture I’d be happy to see end.
“You know, my work here’s been a lot duller than I imagined. I was hoping for something more like…dramatically improving the quality of life with the power of science or making the natives panic using a bit of superior technology…”
The Lilithification and Praise Project that was supposed to progress by way of tech transfers and getting the local ruling power in our pocket isn’t going as hoped.
And that’s partly due to…
“Not a whole lot we can do about it, Lady Lilith. Sure, this planet’s science is primitive, but they’ve got magic to make up for it.”
“That’s the problem! Magic, shmagic! They’re just spitting in the face of science at this point!”
It’s understandable that Lilith would fly into a rage much like Alice does.
Part of the reason behind this kingdom’s undeveloped technology is something called “magitech.”
One example of this is the water spirit stones, which are exported by our neighbor-turned-enemy, the kingdom of Toris.
Evidently, they’re used to pay water spirits in exchange for having them bring water from somewhere else.
…Yes, you heard that right. Water spirits.
“What the hell are these spirits anyway?! There’s a limit to this fantasy-world nonsense! When I tried to show off my lighter to a local, they laughed and said fire spirit stones are more useful. The heck is a fire spirit stone?!”
“Well, it’s not like magic is all-powerful. When I asked my subordinate Grimm to create some pretty women, she told me to bugger off.”
At that moment, Lilith scrunches her face into a grimace at the mention of Grimm’s name.
“Grimm… Grimm, right… That’s the shady woman you mentioned in your reports, right?”
“I mean, if you want to call her that, I guess she’s kind of shady, but I think she’d cry if she heard. I mean, you’re the one who wears a lab coat all year long.”
Just then.
<Evil Points Acquired>
“…Huh.”
“…Six, did you just get some Evil Points?”
Seeing my surprised reaction, Lilith inquires with a similar expression.
In fact, the points just keep coming, and the announcements become a steady rhythm in my head.
“Yeah, I did get a random notification, and the points are still pouring in, actually. Is this happening to you as well, Lady Lilith?”
“Yeah, I keep getting points… I wonder what’s going on. It’s creepy not knowing the cause…”
Even as we tilt our heads in puzzlement, the announcements don’t stop.
If we just leave things the way they are, my point deficit will be gone in no time.
“The weird thing is we’re both getting them. What did you do this time, Lady Lilith?”
“Wait, that’s my line. I don’t think I’ve done anything notable on this planet, so it might be something back in Japan. Maybe the fact that I’m here flirting with you got back to Astaroth, and her heartbreak is being counted as an act of villainy?”
I don’t think our super- tsundere leader is quite that cute…
“I wonder if there’s snooping equipment installed here or something. Do you wanna try flirting some more?”
“Nope, I’m going to have to decline… Hey, watch where you put those hands! If you’ve got sexual harassment on the brain, I’ve got ways of dealing with that.”
My grabby hands recoil from Lilith.
“Commander, we’ve got a problem! There’s a chance a Demon Lord operative found their way into the city!”
With those words, the aforementioned Grimm appears in the room.
Leaving behind her wheelchair, Grimm approaches us by walking barefoot on the park’s grass.
“…Hmm? What’s going on, Commander? I leave you alone for a bit, and you use that time to see another girl? You don’t look like you’d be that popular, yet somehow, you keep meeting new people!”
Displeasure plain on her face, Grimm glares at Lilith, who’s standing next to me.
I wave my hand at the little scientist.
“This is my boss, Lady Lilith. She’s one of Kisaragi’s Supreme Leaders!”
“Oh?!”
Hearing that, Grimm holds a hand to her mouth as though she’s figured something out, then straightens her posture…
“A pleasure to make your acquaintance, Lady Lilith. I am Grimm Grimoire, Combat Agent Six’s fiancée. No doubt I have much to learn, but I appreciate your instruction and mentorship.”
Sitting down on the park lawn, Grimm bows formally to Lilith.
“…Six, a moment please.”
Lilith gestures for me to join her.
I approach as instructed…
“What’s this about her being your fiancée? Did you really get engaged to a native of this planet? What about all the flirting you were doing with Astaroth on Earth? What’s the meaning of this?”
“She’s not my fiancée. We just made a promise that if we’re both single in ten years, we’d marry each other. Besides, I never really flirted with Lady Astaroth…”
“That’s literally an engagement! And yes, you were flirting with Astaroth!”
Glancing over at Grimm, I see she’s watching our whispered conversation with a smile on her face, her hands folded over her stomach.
Lilith looks less than pleased as she approaches Grimm.
“Well, fine, I guess I’ll introduce myself at the very least… My name’s Lilith. I’m one of the Kisaragi Corporation’s Supreme Leaders. I’m the mother to all Combat Agents and mutants, Lilith the Black! I’ve known this man for a long time; we’re practically family. Seems you’ve done much for our Six.”
Lilith speaks with her hands stuffed in her pockets while glaring up at Grimm.
As for Grimm herself, she doesn’t seem particularly bothered by the fact that my boss is acting like some random gangster.
“Not at all, Mother! In fact, it is I who owes Sir Six!”
“Seriously, it’s such a chore to push you around in your wheelchair and carry you up and down various obstacles. Not to mention that you die every time I turn my head.”
Grimm puffs out her cheeks at my words, but I find that sort of affectation irritating from a woman her age.
In contrast to the cheerful Grimm, Lilith mutters to herself, face frozen in shock.
“…Huh? D-did you just…call me ‘Mother’?”
Ignoring her stunned mother-in-law, Grimm keeps puffing out her cheeks as she responds:
“I mean, even if you say that, it’s not like I can help it. I can’t wear shoes, after all. I mean, I feel plenty bad for making you do it. That’s why I pay for dinner all the time, since you’re always short on money anyway.”
“Those two things are separate, you know. I mean, I use the allowance Alice gives me to pay for things all the time. Also, stop inflating your cheeks like that. It’s not cute when a hag does it. It’s just annoying.”
I guess I crossed a line with the word hag . I end up having to defend myself as Grimm tries to strangle me. While this plays out, Lilith mutters to herself again.
“Hey… Did you really just call me ‘Mother’…?”
Leaving the flummoxed Lilith to one side, Grimm bares her fangs and snarls.
“Speaking of which, Commander, why do you even accept an allowance from Alice?! I’m the only woman you should depend on! When we’re married, I’ll spoil you rotten!”
Suddenly, it seems like marrying Grimm wouldn’t be the worst idea, but the sense of danger that I’ve honed over years working as a Combat Agent advises me otherwise.
“That’s honestly tempting, but didn’t you have a reason for being here?”
Remembering her original purpose, Grimm returns to her senses.
“That’s right, this is hardly the time to be calmly exchanging greetings! Seems there’s a Demon Lord operative inside the city, just like during the Undead Festival!”
Lilith and I exchange glances at the word operative .
“…Well, we can’t let that go unanswered! Terrorism and sabotage ops are our bread and butter. Just leave it to us!”
“Well, if I must, since you always buy me dinner… But you better pay for our drinks tonight.”
Having secured our assistance, Grimm smiles as though reassured.
No Comments Yet
Post a new comment
Register or Login