8
“S-sho…I ashume there’s no need to worry about the unforgivably i-i-injolent things I shaid?”
“Dude, what language is that supposed to be?”
After Subaru gave Liliana the marquis’s verdict, Liliana completely deflated and slid out of her chair in relief. It was a pitiful sight, but Subaru graciously overlooked it. After all, while she’d been waiting to hear the news, she was probably the most anxious she’d ever been in her life.
“Now that you’re out of the woods, don’t get any weird ideas that you can wrap the lord of the land up in your problems. Fact of the matter is, you were unforgivably insolent—that’s not hyperbole.”
“Urgh! I-I’m sorry. I strive to make my conscience lighter than a breeze, clearer than a surging stream!”
“Okay, I’m banning your absurd quips. They’re upstaging mine.”
Liliana didn’t have the heart to protest. Her actions had directly exposed the lord of the land’s staff to mortal danger. It was undeniably shortsighted and naive.
Subaru found it reassuring that Liliana seemed so obviously devastated and regretful. But somebody else puffed her cheeks in anger after listening to their conversation—namely, Emilia.
“Subaru. Liliana is clearly very sorry for what she did. Can’t you go easy on her?”
“No, I can’t, Emilia-tan. You’ve gotta be blunt with dumbasses like this; otherwise, they never attain the gift of self-awareness. She has to get it through her thick skull how keeping secrets can endanger those around— Emilia-tan, why are you looking at me like that?”
“No reason. I was just thinking how awful it must be to lack self-awareness.”
For some inexplicable reason, Subaru felt very uncomfortable under Emilia’s surprisingly scornful gaze. Sensing he was at a disadvantage, he turned away from Emilia and back to Liliana.
“Now, we’d love to hear your side of the story again, in detail… Just how long have those vagabonds in white been following you?”
“I’ve got absolutely no idea. I only discovered they were following me a few days ago… Don’t ask me to be more specific than that.”
“You’re saying you didn’t notice anything that might give us a clue?”
“Nope. Just little things, like my favorite quill disappearing, my clean clothes being gone when I get out of the bath, and my instrument vanishing from the lodge…”
“Um, that sounds like a classic stalker?!”
Subaru cried out in realization, only for Emilia and Liliana to give him confused stares. Apparently, neither of them knew what a stalker was. Emilia was the perfect being, and Liliana was beautiful as long as she kept her mouth shut—he hoped they would be extra vigilant about that sort of thing.
Subaru shook his head vigorously as he remembered how the attackers looked. “Your things going missing probably had nothing to do with the gang that’s been hounding you. Probably just some die-hard fans. Has anybody ever chased after you with a sharp object before?”
“Mm-hmm! The way you worded that sounds vaguely wrong somehow…but no, sir, I’ll have you know that today was the first time I caught a glimpse of something sharp and shiny. Otherwise, I’d have a much more solemn look on my face right now.”
“You don’t look all that solemn now… But anyway, what you’re saying is, their MO changed suddenly.”
Subaru’s mind raced, trying to find a motive for the men in white after hearing Liliana’s testimony. But the only abnormality that happened directly to Liliana—the only lead he had—was one event.
“You coming here…and meeting directly with the marquis… You think that made the men in white nervous?”
If Liliana meeting Roswaal had given her assailants a scare, then everything started falling into place. That would mean her assailants had a specific reason why they didn’t want Liliana making contact with one of the royal candidates.
“Dude, don’t tell me you have no clue whatsoever. You reek of some seriously shady shit. If you know something, you’d better barf it up now. Otherwise, we can’t guarantee we can protect you.”
“How dare you say a word like barf in front of a fair maiden! I swear on my ancestors and on my lyulyre, I’m not hiding anything! Actually, wait, let’s leave my lyulyre out of this!”
“Hey, don’t crap out on me when we’re running out of time!”
Subaru yelled at the bard as she cradled her livelihood to her chest. But as far as he could tell, she was sincerely racking her brain for a clue. After muttering and nodding to herself a few times, she finally said, “I don’t have even the teensiest intention of keeping any secrets from you—my brain just isn’t working! Y’know what it feels like when you’ve got a fish bone lodged between every tooth? The wrongness of it is torture, I tell you!”
“Uh, you should probably debone your fish before you eat them, then.” How did Liliana manage to have the most serious of intentions and still be the silliest in practice? Subaru turned to Emilia in hopes of steering the conversation back on course.
“So fish-bone metaphors aside…did you figure anything out, Emilia-tan? I’m sure she babbled to you incessantly while you were in here waiting with her, right?”
“Not at all, actually. According to Liliana, she didn’t sense anything was amiss until a couple weeks ago… It started before she arrived at Earlham Village. It was around the time she left a town called Wawer. If something particular caused this, then—”
“—Then it happened there. We can be ninety-nine percent sure whatever happened there was the cause of all this. Either something impactful happened or she screwed up or— Hey.”
“Why is it a foregone conclusion that I screwed up? I must protest this absolute slander!” Liliana cried. Subaru answered her screeching with a chop to the face. She puffed up her lips, grabbed her two pigtails, and shook her head. “Even if you insist…nothing was out of the ordinary. That town was a little cold to strangers, so I didn’t exactly feel welcome. That’s all, real…ly… Oh! Ohh!!! My songs! Please don’t sigh after I finish…! Please don’t look at me like that…!”
“Um, sorry to make you relive something traumatizing, but could you elaborate? I think we’re finally getting somewhere.”
Emilia interjected, “What I’d like to know is, why would you stay at such a terrible place for even one day? I’ve experienced the same thing, and it’s just not a good feeling for either party.”
“Oh dear, I’ve caught a glimpse of Emilia-tan’s painful past.”
As Liliana shivered and clutched her head, Emilia’s well-meaning words of wisdom twisted the knife. But it was a reasonable observation. Bards traveled the earth wherever the winds took them. There was no reason someone as footloose and fancy-free as Liliana had to stay in a place where she felt uncomfortable.
“Oh! See, I do have a reason for that. Yes, the townsfolk were a bit standoffish, and it was just awful, but as luck would have it, the richest old-timer in the town took a liking to me!”
“Oh-ho…a rich old man, eh?”
“Oooh yes! He doted on me like I was his own sweet granddaughter. He even bought me a new lyulyre! That’s why this is brand spanking new!”
As Liliana proudly thrust out her lyulyre, Subaru impulsively took it. Mostly because Liliana was getting a little too carried away, but also because he thought it sounded like Liliana had tricked a lonely old man into giving her a bunch of money.
“He fed me yummy food, let me sleep in a soft bed, bought me new clothes and a new lyulyre… It was like a dream. Gee-hee-hee.”
“Y’know, it wouldn’t hurt to bring a little more grace outside your performances…”
Liliana was drooling and giggling like a drunk. But not only did she ignore Subaru’s advice, she also suddenly hid her silly face and said, “But though it pains me to say it, my happy time there was fleeting. I don’t know what I did wrong, but the old man suddenly kicked me out of his house one day. My spree ended there.”
“So…did you break a vase, sneak food between meals, or have an accident in bed?”
“H-how rude! I haven’t had an accident in five years, thank you very much!”
Five years ago… That would make her sixteen… Subaru stopped there and decided he didn’t want to go through the trouble of unpacking that. Ultimately, it seemed she really didn’t have any clue why she had been kicked out. Even now, Liliana looked utterly perplexed.
The words rich old man sounded quite fishy on their own…but it was quite a reach to assume that was the root of the stalking. Unless the people stalking her were under some misunderstanding about what had transpired between Liliana and the old man.
“Either way, our two clues are the town of Wawer and the old man who lives there. I’ll run this by Roswaal just in case… I wonder if he’ll look into it?”
“Oh, butbutbut! All the old man did was take care of me and teach me the song that must never be sung… I just can’t think of anything that might be important.”
Emilia sighed. “Is that so…? Yes, I suppose none of that would serve as a clue. Oh bother…”
“Whoa, hold up.” Subaru frantically butted into the conversation, hearing something he couldn’t ignore. Both ladies gave him quizzical looks, so it seemed neither of them was joking around.
This is why ditziness scares me sometimes. Emilia-tan, you’re an angel.
“Excuse me, um… What exactly is this song that must never be sung?”
“Huh…? Well, it’s a song the old man taught me. It contains the secret of how he amassed his fortune. Both compositionally and lyric-wise, it’s really not my thing, if I’m gonna be honest.”
“Now, Liliana, you shouldn’t talk that way about a song that was gifted to you,” Emilia protested. “Would you sing some of it for us?”
“Oooh yes, I’d love to! While I’m at it, I’d love to perform every song I know for you!”
Liliana took her lyulyre back from Subaru and started strumming in high spirits. Emilia’s eyes sparkled, her heart dancing from the bard’s offer.
And as Subaru watched the pair, he pinched the spot between his eyes. Then he took in a deep breath and yelled—
“The song! It’s the song, you dumbass!!!”
—and promptly crashed into the blissfully innocent pair’s happy moment.
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