Monogatari Series - Volume 23 - Chapter 1.02

002

It had been a while since I’d been to a hospital.

However, it wasn’t that I, Araragi Koyomi, was particularly afraid of syringes, nor did I have a fear of lab coats—in fact, I actually loved them. This is just between you and me, but there’d been one time that I’d made my girlfriend wear a lab coat… We’d roleplayed using a mechanical pencil as a syringe.

Regardless (as much as it made me fall into some frustrations), the reason I’d stayed away from hospitals regardless of anything was that, during spring break when I was still a 17-year-old high schooler, I’d had my blood sucked by the golden-haired and golden-eyed, iron-blooded, hot-blooded, cold-blooded vampire, beautiful enough to send chills down my spine, and spent about 2 weeks as a vampire. And, because of the aftereffects, I had become completely free of injuries and diseases.

I was in such good health that I was almost tired of it.

Or rather, if I found myself getting examined at a hospital, then my aberrant regeneration abilities or superior eyesight could come to light, and I could end up being used as a sample for human experimentation… As a result, I’d even come up with an excuse to skip out on the physical examinations that occurred when entering college.

For the sake of my rose-colored campus life, there was no end to the caution I’d need to take… Regardless, the reason I came to the Naoetsu General Hospital this time was because I’d been personally called there by an adult that I owed more to than even my own parents.

By Gaen Izuko-san.

“So, what do you think, Koyomin? About this patient,” said Gaen-san.

In a room on the fifth floor of the fourth ward, she spoke almost as if a doctor would—as if she were asking for my opinion. But I was in the science department and not the medical department, and if we were saying that, then not even Gaen-san was a doctor, either. Although, if it was her, it wouldn’t be surprising if she had multiple doctor’s licenses… Of course, while I had no intention of pretending to be a doctor at this point, after being prompted, I decided to give the bedridden “patient” a look.

Actually, because the single room wasn’t all that big, that “patient” had already been in my field of vision since I’d entered, but it was just hard for me to look directly—I’d averted my eyes on reflex.

It felt like I’d seen something I wasn’t supposed to.

The “patient” that was lying on the bed was,

“…A mummy.”

While it had been made to wear a patient gown for hospital use, at the very least, it did not seem like a living being—or so it seemed.

“This is a mummy, isn’t it? A human one, at that.”

When I was a high schooler, there’d been a time that I witnessed something like a mummified monkey, but from the physique, and from the hair that was still left on the head, even if they’d gotten completely dried up, I could tell for certain that this mummy was a human.

Even if they weren’t a living human.

They were certainly a dead human.

“No, no, this isn’t even a dead human, Koyomin.”

“…Um, Gaen-san. Isn’t it about time for you to stop calling me ‘Koyomin’? I’m already a college student now.”

“A college freshman is practically the same as a newborn baby, you know. It was the same for me. I would say, goo goo ga ga.”

She was totally unapproachable.

Well, it was a waste of breath. Considering this woman of unknown age, even once I became a full-fledged adult, she would probably still affectionately call me “Koyomin”… But anyway, what did she mean by, “this isn’t even a dead human”?

“It’s alive. Still. Even in this state.”

Gaen-san spoke without a moment’s hesitation—it was a composed, not overly dramatic way of speaking very much like a specialist, or rather, very much like the administrator of specialists.

However, as someone who wasn’t even close to being a specialist, it was a line I couldn’t overlook.

This mummy was still alive? Really?

I would’ve guessed this was some kind of sokushinbutsu, some kind of mummified monk, that had been brought from some temple… Although, thinking about it, it would be in bad taste even for Gaen-san to lay someone like that to rest in the bed of a hospital.

“Its heart is still beating, and it’s still breathing. Its bodily functions are almost disturbingly normal. Though there’s certainly no consciousness, it’s not dead yet… If you think it’s a lie, you can check for yourself.”

“Check for myself…”

Being told that, I nervously reached out a hand to feel the sleeping mummy’s heartbeat—but just before I touched it, I was rebuked with a, “Hold on, Koyomin”.

“That’s a girl, you know. Touching her chest is off-limits. You could at least take the lady’s arm to get a pulse like a gentleman.”

A girl? Considering it had gotten all dried up, it was impossible to tell the gender of the mummy—however, regardless of whether or not she was a lady, I couldn’t ignore the fact that she was a girl.

“…Then, if you’ll excuse me.”

I touched the left wrist of the mummy. Since she was a mummy, I was worried that she’d crumble into bits if I touched her, so I’d tried to be as gentle as possible, but that dried-up skin was still surprisingly resilient.

And I certainly felt a pulse. Thump, thump, thump.

“I’ll just say this right now, but there’s not actually any blood flowing—though her heart is still beating, there’s no blood circulating.”

It’s just air circulating—said Gaen-san.

“Just air in a hollow body. Like it’s completely empty.”

“……”

As I listened to Gaen-san speak, unsure whether the line was supposed to be a joke or a fact, I pushed aside the mummy’s hair to carefully check the girl’s neck—and, as expected.

Two small holes had been pierced into her neck.

As if she’d been bitten by a snake.

Or, as if she’d been taken in by an oni.

“……”

“Harimaze Kie is the name of that mummy. A female student of the school you used to go to, Naoetsu High… But since she’s a freshman that started this year, I don’t think she’s an acquaintance of yours.”

“…Was she attacked by a vampire?”

Though I’d internally gotten flustered at the name of my alma mater suddenly showing up, I confirmed with Gaen-san something that didn’t need to be said. It was so obvious that it definitely could’ve been left unsaid, but even so, I couldn’t go without asking.

I gradually began to understand why I’d been called here.

“It seems so. On the way back from club activities, it seems she ran into one with a bang.”

“Even though it’d been peaceful.”

That was all I could say.

I had no intention of pretending that I understood anything.

However, everything started when I was attacked by a vampire during that spring break—the turmoil that ensued should have been brought to an end with my graduation ceremony, but to think that, just a few months later, a case like this would occur.

Well, it was possible that incidents like this occurred frequently across the world that I just didn’t know about—if not for that, then Gaen-san, “the onee-san that knew everything”, would be out of a job.

It was a terrible business opportunity.

It was a very niche livelihood—or rather, a niche death-lihood.

“So you’re saying, this girl… Harimaze-chan? Did Harimaze-chan turn into a vampire?”

“Well, it seems that she failed to turn into a vampire.”

Gaen-san shrugged.

“This is a fairly common occurrence. Successes like your case, Koyomin, are actually rarer. Although, with what happened, from the side of the vampire that sucked your blood, it was a huge failure for her.”

Saying that, Gaen-san lowered her eyes to the linoleum that was characteristic of hospitals… That is, to my shadow on the floor.

Of course, there was no response from my shadow.

We were in broad daylight.

“Even though she’s still alive, she’s just barely not dead… Just a mummy with all its blood sucked out. Not on the verge of death, but still more dead than alive. Is that it…”

Even I could’ve become like this at that time… However, while a part of me was trembling, another part of me was relieved.

I had no intention of saying that it was fortunate that Harimaze-chan had her blood sucked by a vampire and turned into a mummy where it wasn’t clear whether she was alive or not—but, as long as she was still alive, there was still hope.

And because of that, just like there had been for me, there must be a way to turn her back into a human—so the fact that her vampire transformation had failed was a blessing in disguise.

In my case, I had no choice but to do something about it by myself through my own efforts and self-education, but in this case, the omniscient specialist Gaen-san was presiding over it… I wasn’t exactly optimistic, but there had to be a way to help this girl out.

“‘Help her’, huh? Didn’t my very own Hawaiian-shirt guy say something about that?”

“…I’ve already completely forgotten what your Hawaiian-shirt guy has said, but Gaen-san, it’s not something you say, isn’t it? You don’t say anything like, ‘You can’t help her. People can only help themselves.’”

“It seems like you remember it, though.”

Gaen-san gave a sarcastic laugh.

“Of course, I’m here to help this girl, Harimaze-chan. However, Koyomin. If you simply think that a homebody like me being out here from the beginning is ‘dependable’, then that would be troublesome for me,” she said.

What did she say?

“Huh? What does that mean? If you’re saying you can’t be depended on, Gaen-san, then who else is there that we can depend on?”

“That’s a very nice thing to say, but before I explain, let’s change locations.”

“Change locations? To where?”

“We’ll be making our rounds. Since it doesn’t seem like you hate playing doctor, Koyomin, let me introduce you to the next patient.”