Monogatari Series - Volume 23 - Chapter 1.01

Shinobu Mustard

001

This spring, Harimaze Kie was a first-year that had just enrolled in Naoetsu Private High School and a part of the girls’ basketball team, and naturally, she was extremely regretting both of those decisions. She was regretting having enrolled in the university-focused Naoetsu High that had a high standard score, and she was regretting having joined the girls’ basketball team that was too Spartan for a school that was supposed to be university-focused.

After all, the Naoetsu High girls’ basketball team had previously had a super high-school level superstar, and the team had actually competed on a national level. But, as mentioned above, that senior had already retired, and what remained for the next generation to inherit was simply an intense training regimen.

A sports club with intense training, even though they weren’t good.

That was the worst.

It was an ancient style of training that was influenced by images of a golden age—a bloated self-projection of, “we’re both human beings, so I should be able to reach her level”.

In the first place, this superstar senior had ultimately sustained an injury to her left arm and opted for an early retirement, so a Spartan training regimen was really meaningless, or rather, it could even prove to be backfiring on the team… So why was the club still forcing its members to do bunny hops?

Having said that, she wasn’t exactly willing to quit the club of her own accord. If the coach or the captain were to give her the cruel verdict of, “You have no talent so you should just quit,” then she’d happily resign with that as the reason. But unfortunately—and perhaps this was also a remnant of the era in which a superstar was a member—the Spartan girls’ basketball team had a strong sense of solidarity.

And a strong sense of solidarity meant a heavy sense of collective responsibility.

If quitting of her own accord could end up influencing her teammates in some way, then it was hard to even bring up the subject… If she even said a word of “wanting to quit”, then it would stop being just her problem alone.

Even though it was a tradition that couldn’t be right, she didn’t want to be the cause of putting it to an end… She wanted the evil tradition to come to its natural end, praying that it wasn’t made out to be her fault. Stemming from the collective responsibility was a desire to shift the responsibility onto someone else. And probably, the other teammates were also continuing to endure the hard training with similar motives, their hands tied by similar ropes, all being foolish together.

And with that, it was today as well that Harimaze Kie had unwillingly participated in club activities right up until she was allowed to leave, dragging her two legs that ached with unending muscular pain down the dark evening path as she’d done for the past few months.

Her teammates all left in different directions, and obviously the time she left from school didn’t coincide with her friends from class (in fact, her club activities had been so intense that she’d fallen out of contact with her friends from class), so she was returning home alone in a way that couldn’t possibly be considered safe. She was even wondering if some bad guy wouldn’t just come up and attack her already.

Even though she’d be able to triumphantly quit the club if she were to get badly hurt.

Even as she realized her thoughts had gone in too serious a direction, she could no longer control her thoughts anymore… She had become utterly exhausted from taking over the awful legacy that had meaninglessly remained, even as she knew it was backfiring.

Even her grades continued to decline.

It was true that practice was stopped before exams, but she’d found it hard to escape from the unspoken pressure of “training on your own” and “training in secret”, and so her first midterm exams had resulted in awful scores that would have been unthinkable for her in middle school. And at this rate, her rank for the final exams was sure to fall in the triple digits.

Well, not all of it could be blamed on club activities.

The students that had gathered at this private, university-focused school had simply had grades so excellent it made her embarrassed for having evaluated herself as a prodigy just a few months before… She’d gotten depressed, thinking things like, “Won’t I end up becoming the first dropout since Naoetsu High was founded?”

Ah, that’s why I want to be attacked.

Somebody attack me. Beat me up.

Turn my life into chaos.

It could become an excuse for me to quit the club, and I might even get exempted from final exams… Then I can study while in the hospital and catch up on what I’ve fallen behind on. That’s right, even if I wasn’t a prodigy, I should be diligent enough to do that.

I can still redo everything.

Was this way of thinking just escapism?

(Escapism… Did that mean escaping from reality? Or did it mean managing to escape to reality?)

To throw away her hopes and dreams, and focus on reality.

In a sense, that was also a form of escapism… But in any case, there was no bad guy that conveniently appeared to bash her head in on Harimaze Kie’s way home. No matter how many times, how many days she prayed.

Ah, then it’s fine even if it isn’t some bad guy.

It’s fine if I get run over by a car at some corner, and it’s fine if an airplane crashes onto my exact location… If it can make it easier for me, then anything’s fine.

Even if it isn’t reality… Even if it’s a fantasy.

Like.

Yes, even something like a monstrous apparition—

“This is something I think every time I come to this country, but… There isn’t a phrase that makes me less thankful than ‘Thanks for the meal’… And saying ‘It was delicious’ is practically the opposite of delicious.”

As she came near a three-way intersection, and as she walked—no, as she painfully dragged her legs while looking at her smartphone to make it even easier for a bad guy to attack her from behind, Harimaze Kie was, very openly, approached from the front.

And, as if a self-introduction was a form of etiquette that could never be forgotten—

“I’m the great Deathtopia Virtuoso Suicidemaster. The death-prepared, death-inevitable, death-certain vampire.”

Her hope had been granted. Or perhaps, her despair had been granted.

Thinking that, Harimaze Kie raised her head.