I WENT TO A SINGLES’ PARTY AT A FISHING PORT
One day, I was out shopping in Flatta like always.
Someone from the house usually came along when I went shopping, and this time, it was Flatorte. There wasn’t a lot of entertainment out here, but there was always something going on in the village.
I exchanged the magic stones I got from slimes with Natalie at the guild.
“Here’s my haul this time,” I said, handing the stones to her.
If I were just saving money, then selling the edible slime manju would bring in way more cash, but I’d been doing this for three hundred years now; I couldn’t just stop out of the blue.
“Oh, thank you, as always. One, two, three…” As Natalie counted, she was staring at us for some reason.
“Er… Is something wrong, Natalie?”
“Both you and Miss Flatorte are quite attractive, aren’t you?”
Her compliment came out of nowhere. It was sudden, but it didn’t feel unsettling. Flatorte seemed nonplussed but not upset.
“Of course! Many dragon-men have said to me, the great Flatorte, that I am adorable when I remain silent!”
You’d think saying it aloud would disillusion her…but I’m not gonna say anything… It seemed Flatorte took it as a compliment.
More importantly, why did Natalie say that? She wouldn’t call us pretty without a reason. We always saw each other, after all. She was a real go-getter when it came down to it, and this was a village guild with a small staff, which meant the employees were all skilled, multitalented people.
“Is there more trouble again? Or a weird request…?”
Natalie didn’t outright deny it, so that meant I wasn’t too off the mark.
“Actually…it’s not exactly a request, but this came in…”
She slid a flyer my way.
This is what it said:
There sure was a lot of information on this flyer…
But I got what she wanted to say right away: They’re holding a singles’ party, so the young people should go.
I didn’t know they had singles’ mixers here in this world, too…
“Flatta’s growth is all thanks to you, great Witch of the Highlands. We are truly thankful. But there are some regions out there that are struggling with a declining population…,” Natalie explained with a sigh.
Well, there was no point in holding a singles’ party in towns and villages where the population was bigger and there were more kids.
Also, I only helped increase the population because all the medicines I made decreased the village’s infant mortality rate over time. Children often die until medical science advances, and that’s true for any world.
“This Tazine is a small fishing port, but fishing work is hard and starts early in the morning, so more and more young people are leaving the village. It’s had a real negative impact on the population.”
That sure was a specific reason… Fishermen did head out to sea super early, though…
“They tried to stop it, but none of their ideas worked, so they decided to hold this event. Here in Flatta, especially, our population has been slowly growing over a long period of time, so the guild there assumed we must have good men and women here and asked me to invite them…”
The guilds had a wide network, so they were sometimes used as public offices like this. This was one such instance, apparently.
“So you want us to attend this singles’ party—is that what you’re trying to say?”
“Yes, well, er…that’s right…” Natalie smiled uncomfortably. “See, I was thinking maybe you should be keeping an eye out for someone, you know? Of course, I don’t mind if you just go to relax and sightsee, though…”
But Natalie’s expression was stiff, so I decided to test her a little. “Huh. But what if I end up marrying someone after this and I never come back to Flatta? That would be a blow to the village; are you okay with that?”
I was contributing to the village in many ways, after all. I had no intentions of making them pay me back, but I was just checking to see if Natalie was in earnest.
Her face immediately blanched. “I’m sorry; I’m sorry! Flatta could never afford to lose you! Please live in the house in the highlands forever!”
“Well, at least I know how you really feel now.”
“I’m sorry… I have to send a young person over, even if it’s just for show; otherwise I think the guild management will chew me out… I mean, Tazine is a little fishing village, which is so unlike our village here in the highlands. It’s so far away, and I doubt any of the villagers would go…”
I get it. She had to entice people to go. That kind of thing was a pain. When I was a corporate slave, I would get all angry when I was given a quota that would never be sensibly fulfilled.
“What about you, Miss Flatorte? Are you interested in getting married?” Natalie pressed.
The expression on Flatorte’s face said that she was somewhat interested. Not a flat no, at least.
“S-sure… There aren’t many dragon-men out there who understand my great charm…”
It was hard to tell since she looked so young, but Flatorte was actually already around four hundred years old, and she had been searching for a (dragon) partner to marry since before we met.
The first time I encountered Flatorte was when she crashed Laika’s big sister’s wedding ceremony, apparently furious that someone younger than her had an older sister who was getting married.
Basically, Flatorte had always been interested in marriage. She’d probably forgotten about it after joining us in the highlands, but now she remembered again.
“I don’t think you’d be very interested in human men, but it might be nice just to look. Just to look… Really, just to look…”
It was starting to sound like we were going…
To let you in on how I really felt, I didn’t think sending Flatorte to a singles’ party in a human fishing village would go over very well at all. It wasn’t just because dragons and humans were completely different species; blue dragons were an incredibly irresponsible race. They worked only when they felt like it, and when they didn’t have to do anything, they really didn’t do anything. All of them had the mentality of high school delinquents. It would take a lot for her to get used to village life.
And it was just a theory, but—
I placed my hand on Flatorte’s horn.
“Flatorte, I will personally put your feelings ahead of anything else, but the rules say you can’t leave me, right…? You have to stay with the person who touches your horns, right?”
“Urgh…yes…I cannot leave you, Mistress… I didn’t forget or anything… I just remembered what it was like when I was looking for a partner…”
Flatorte looked at me apologetically. From the way she was acting, she hadn’t been thinking about marriage, but she remembered when she saw the flyer.
There was a rule that a blue dragon had to stay with whoever touched their horns. That was why adventurers used to get all worked up over taming them and becoming magnificent dragon knights.
But since that was a rule by the irresponsible blue dragons, we could get away with just living together and letting her go shopping for me once in a while. Flatorte living in her own house somewhere else was just plain against the rules.
I had no intention of binding her to me, but if that wasn’t okay with Flatorte, then it was all the same.
“Sorry, but I don’t think you can g—”
“Please, could you go, even if it’s just for sightseeing?!” Natalie’s voice was strained. “You really just need to pop in and show up! I’m sure if beautiful people like you are there, the guys will get more into it, and more will come next time!”
Wouldn’t we just be like a paid audience, then…?
“And Tazine is so far if you use normal means of transportation, so the villagers of Flatta don’t want to go! But you can get around on dragonback, great Witch, so I think it’s close enough for you to attend…”
I see…so it’s too far geographically from Flatta… Then could they not put a request through Natalie here in the guild, at least?
“Um…but then it would be like counting people who really came to sightsee as party attendees; is that okay? I have no plans to get married. I feel free enough living with my daughters.”
Tazine was probably mainly after money for their economy. In the one in a million chance that I did end up getting married, I had absolutely no intentions of leaving my house in the highlands, so I wouldn’t really be much help.
“Yes, that’s all right! It’s hard to tell if you are intending to get married or not through the data anyway! The act of attending itself is what’s important! That’s fine!”
Natalie, you’re not even trying to hide your opinion…
“Oh, I just thought of something!” Flatorte cut in. Was her contribution going to be worth it? “Hey, Natalie, you’re not married yet, right?”
“R-right… The more a guild employee knows about their town, the more cautious others feel around them. There really isn’t any chance for me to date…”
“You should attend the party. I, the great Flatorte, shall carry you there.”
“Wh-wh-wh-whaaaaaaaaat?!” Natalie yelled loud enough for the entire guild hall to hear, but to be honest, I didn’t think it was a terrible idea. It was way better than just bringing a group full of people who weren’t even looking for a partner.
A few days later, we all climbed on dragon-Flatorte’s back and headed for Tazine.
And when I say we, I mean the four of us: me, Flatorte, Halkara, and Natalie.
Since we were accompanying Natalie to the singles’ party, I also felt less guilty about not being a real attendee, so it was perfect.
We decided to have Halkara come along to balance out the party as well. In terms of her looks, she was perfectly beautiful, which would make the men think this party had high standards.
And since there would be mushrooms growing by the sea that didn’t grow here, Halkara had her own reason to go. Her boundless curiosity was perfect for this.
“The village of Tazine is a fishing port on the shores of the inland sea. The waters are calm, but it is quite out of the way…,” Halkara said as she looked at a map. She was rather knowledgeable about geography, especially since she ran a factory.
“What kind of fish can you get there?”
“Mostly long ones.”
That was a unique answer…
“We elves rarely eat the blessings of the sea, so I’m not very familiar with fish… I am interested in mushrooms that mature under the salty sea breeze, though…”
“Of course that’s what you’d be interested in…”
On the other hand, Natalie was muttering, “Handsome guys, handsome guys…” She seemed to be enthusiastic about it in her own way.
It was hard to meet new people in small villages like Flatta, so maybe leaving to find a partner was the right idea.
“I wonder what they have for sightseeing… Oh, I guess the Misjantie Temple. That is pretty famous within the kingdom~”
“There’s a big temple in the village, right, Halkara?”
“Yes, a large temple that enshrines the spirit of pine as its chief god. Pine trees grow even near the seashore, you know. They say that the biggest pine there is the spirit Misjantie.”
Maybe around here, spirits were essentially the same thing as Shinto gods. It wasn’t unusual to see a pine forest near the sea, so it did seem like a plausible faith.
“Also, it seems there’s a long-standing belief among the area that the pine spirit could also act as a mediator in marriage. That’s because there was a tree whose two roots then combined into one, so they say it has a benefit for couples.”
“It’s kind of ironic that a village worshipping a marriage spirit has to hold a singles’ party…”
And then we finally reached the village of Tazine, but—
It was more desolate than I thought.
No one was here. There were almost more cats than people. There was a line of pine trees along the coast, but there wasn’t a single person walking among them. So bleak…
Then there was a strong gust of wind.
“Ahhh! Sand got in my eye! It’s telling me that elves should stay away from the sea!”
“I think you’re just unlucky, Halkara.”
First, I had to take at least Natalie to the singles’ party reception, which should be around here. Where was it…?
At the edge of the pine forest, there was a table that looked promising. There was a banner across it that said TAZINE BOYS’ CLUB, so that was probably right.
There was a man sitting at the reception table who looked to be somewhere in his sixties, right on the border between middle-aged and old. He had a tough-looking face, probably because he was still actively working as a seaman.
Natalie approached the receptionist. “Hello, I’m here for the singles’ party!”
“Well! I’m glad’ja made it. What a relief! Our little shindy’s at the table in the woods behind me, so go on in! All the hot-blooded boys are back there~!”
The receptionist had a bit of an accent. He seemed really happy. I felt kind of bad that I wasn’t here for real… I could just stay with her and accompany her the whole time…
But something caught my attention.
Did he call this a shindy…? That sounds a little old-fashioned…
After Natalie took in all her surroundings, she asked me, “Erm, what’s a shindy?”
There sure didn’t seem to be anything like that around here. We did spot a table in one area that was full of elderly men playing chess and drinking alcohol.
I had a bad feeling about this.
“Everyone at that table over there’s part’a the Tazine Boys’ Club. They’re all lively and looking for love, so have fun~!”
“Wait, but they’re all seniors…” Natalie’s eyes were not smiling.
“Naw, that’s the boys’ club. Their average age is what, sixty-seven?”
Your definition of boy is way too broad!
We could hear people talking at the table…
“Hey, y’want something to drink?”
“Eh, my doctor told me I should stop drinking…”
“Your whole body is fallin’ apart!”
“Ha-ha-ha, and you hurt your back the other day, didn’t ya?”
“My back and my neck, I’ll have ya know!”
“I think I’ll use my pension to go on a trip…”
Et cetera.
This was the stuff you hear in a hospital waiting room…
“Well, what with the shrinking population, we can’t have a proper festival at the temple without kids from outside the village, y’see, so we thought about holding a party. Got a little rough once the average age of the boys’ club went past sixty. We’re so happy beautiful girls like you showed up.”
The receptionist was smiling, but Natalie’s eyes were cold. “Erm, isn’t there anyone in their twenties? Or at least in their thirties?”
“I’m the youngest one here. That’s why they put me on reception.”
Seriously? This was just too much… Sigh, countryside problems… No boys in the boys’ club…
Natalie whirled around and turned to face us. She was smiling, which made it even scarier. “I’ve decided I’ll find someone nice in the Flatta area! I’m so sorry for causing you all this trouble! I will be sure to pay for all your lodging and food!”
“Uh, sure, but we’re not really strapped for cash… Why don’t we just go sightseeing now…? Look, the sea’s pretty… Yeah, yeah, let’s do that.”
I’ll give Tazine some credit for sensing the impending crisis, but I think forty years was a little slow to act on it… They needed to come up with a plan to bring in people fast; otherwise, it really would become a ghost town…
After that, we walked along the shore.
The coastal view itself wasn’t so bad. Flatorte found a hermit crab wandering around and got very excited. “Awesome!” For someone looking to get married, her excitement was rather childish.
But still, you could find a beach anywhere next to the water, so it wasn’t a very strong tourist attraction. Plus, getting here by land was very inconvenient, so everyone probably moved to places that weren’t so remote.
There were no voices here, only the sounds of the waves.
“I think walking has made me even more sad,” Halkara murmured.
I nodded. “I hate the noise that comes with a crowd, but when there’s nobody at all around, you know…”
Flatorte ran toward the waves; she seemed happy enough.
I respected her for adapting so quickly.
“Gaaaaaah! A jellyfish stung me!”
“Oh, there are lots of dangerous creatures in the water, so we have to be careful…”
“Madam Teacher, a particularly large crab has clamped onto my leg. And I injured my foot on a rather sharp shell that was buried in the sand.”
“You need to be even more careful when you walk, Halkara!”
You really don’t have to experience all the dangers the beach has to offer…
After that, we walked around the Tazine village center, but it wasn’t enough to call it the center of anything at all. Most of the buildings were abandoned, and barely anyone passed through.
“I didn’t think it would be this bad… Why did they think about holding a singles’ party now…?”
“Great Witch of the Highlands, I’m sure the people who recognized the problem left long ago… Only the dull ones have been left behind… There are plenty of villages like this… I’ve never seen one this bad before, though…”
Natalie just seemed exhausted the whole time.
This was a little beyond anything I was expecting.
That day, we decided to stay at the village’s only inn, the Great Catch.
There were other young women there, but they all looked despondent.
“This was a huge mistake…”
“I can’t believe this place. Wasn’t there supposed to be a temple that brings good things in marriage?”
“I want my money back…”
Everyone was having a tough time… Tazine had it extremely rough, but there was no way they could recover from this…
The seafood on the tables in the dining room wasn’t too bad. It’d been a while since I’d had any fried fish, so it brought back memories. But if that was all they had going for them…
“What should we do tomorrow, great Witch? Go home first thing in the morning? I think we should go home.” Natalie sounded like she was at the overnight vigil before a funeral.
“I—I mean, we’re here already, so why don’t we go to the pine spirit temple…? Remember, the temple itself is supposed to bring good fortune to weddings, so it wouldn’t hurt to go…”
“Then why don’t we do that? With an area this desolate, I think good fortune might be asking a lot, though…”
Natalie had totally given up all hope…
“Natalie, we made the trip, so why don’t we make it a girls’ weekend? How about it? Hmm?”
“Then why don’t we order some alcohol and drink in our room?”
Hey, now we’re getting somewhere! I’m surprised; that’s actually not a bad idea.
“Yeah, why don’t we do that?”
But our girls’ night didn’t quite go as planned.
“Plenty of young adventurers come to the guild… Would it be too much to ask for at least one percent of them to fall in love with me at first sight…? Hic…”
Natalie was a whiny drunk…
I looked at her and suddenly remembered my past life. I never thought about the lives of the shopkeepers in the weapons and item shops in game worlds, but these people had backstories full of tears and joy…
I’m sure they were happy to get a weapon on the cheap sometimes, and getting all the items the hero needed probably took tons of work…
Natalie worked so hard at the guild—I hoped spring would finally come for her!
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