6
After the Sand King vanishes, Rose and Viper come rushing out of the office.
“Are you okay, Boss? What just hit us?!”
“You’re a bit late, Rose! It was a mole! That Sand King thing attacked us!”
The pair gasp at the giant hole in the residential area.
“Please excuse my lateness, Mr. Six. Ms. Rose was choking on her snacks, and she almost died…”
“Oh, don’t worry about it, Vi. You’re a guest. It’s okay for you to stay somewhere safe… But as for you… You’re a Combat Agent. How is it those of us who fought are unharmed, but you were having a brush with death?”
“Well, I learned something new today! Snacks dry out your mouth, so if you try to cram them all down, you can choke!”
Well, at least Rose has leveled up from total dimwit to slightly-less-of-a-dimwit. The Combat Agents who had their equipment blown back by the explosive approach me angrily.
“Hey, moron, what the hell were you thinking tossing a Type B grenade at something that big?!”
“All that talk about being a veteran, and this idiot just gets in the way.”
“You listening to us, dumbass? See all those wrecked buildings? That’s your fault! Go fix ’em!”
“Hey, lay off! Don’t call someone stupid when you’re plenty stupid yourself! Rose, you were late to the fight, so you better help me! Let’s get this cleanup over with!”
“A-all right! I’m sorry we were late!”
After that, Rose and I get to work. Viper helps out, too, for some reason.
“What are you doing, Vi? I said Rose and I would handle this. You can go back to your room. Besides, all the bastards out here (besides me) are creeps. This really isn’t the safest place for you.”
““““Oh yeah?!””””
As the creeps all fly into a rage, Viper shakes her head.
“It’s quite all right. I’ve finished my paperwork, so please let me help. And are you sure you’re all unhurt? Despite appearances, I can use some basic healing magic, so please tell me even if it’s a small injury.”
““““Magic!””””
The creeps all forget their anger thanks to the promise of witnessing real magic.
“What the hell, guys? You’ve seen plenty of magic during your fights with the Demon Lord’s Army, haven’t you? …Sigh, this is why having new recruits on the job is such a pain in the ass. They gawk at every little thi—Ow!”
As I’m standing there bragging about my familiarity with magic to the scumbags, one of them smacks me.
“Ms. Viper, was it? Can you please demonstrate your magic by healing this moron?”
“Oh, how convenient… You want her to heal the cheek you just smacked? You’re not implying that I’m a moron and that she should fix my brain, right?”
Just as I’m picking a fight, Viper gently places her palm against my cheek and chants her spell.
“In the name of the Goddess of Time, restore thy body to good health!”
With that, my cheek, which reddened from the impact, heals as though being restored to a previous state of existence.
““““Woooooow!””””
As the agents hoot and holler at Viper’s magic, the antithetical android pays us a visit.
“That’s not magic; it’s just super advanced technology. You can fool these idiots, but you can’t fool my crystal-lens eyes.”
“You’re usually dependable, but right now, your eyes are made of glass.”
Alice, who still steadfastly refuses to believe in magic, says:
“Yo, Six, smack one of the Combat Agents.”
“OW! Six, you son of a—! …Huh?”
As I smack the Combat Agent who hit me earlier, Alice presses her hand to his swollen cheek.
“Even knowing she’s an android, it’s nice to have a girl touch your cheek… Ow, ow, ow, ow! Alice, what are you doing?!”
Having held the agent in place by grabbing his face, Alice stabs his cheek with a syringe.
Shortly thereafter, the wound rapidly begins healing.
“I injected some healing nanobots. See? The power of science can do the same thing.”
“Don’t make me a guinea pig to compete against the supernatural!”
While that agent starts a shoving match with Alice, the others ignore them and turn to Viper.
“Ms. Viper, you mentioned something about the Goddess of Time, but does that mean your healing works by reversing time? Does that mean you can fix broken things? If so, can you fix my figurine that Six broke?”
“Can you fix tech, too? If so, then please fix the game console in the rec room that Six broke after he got upset the other day…”
As the agents all make their requests, Tiger Man, who has shown no interest in magic until that moment and has been happily helping Rose, stops in his tracks.
With a deathly serious expression, he asks:
“Ms. Viper. Can you use that magic to restore my body to that of a child’s?”
“I-I’m sorry… With my sorcerer stone, the most I can do is restore a small part of someone’s body to how it was a short time ago…”
The request seemed to be so important to Tiger Man that he’d even forgotten to purr while saying it. And after hearing her answer, he simply muttered, “I see,” and stared off into the distance.
“Sorry about all this, Vi. See what I mean about them being creeps? Don’t worry about helping out here. Go back inside. You’re surrounded by mindless beasts. They might try something.”
At my words, the agents clench their jaws in anger, but Viper hurriedly shakes her head.
“No, actually…I had something I wanted to ask you. I heard the Sand King appeared, but does that mean you defeated the master of the Great Woods, the Forest King?”
…What was the Forest King again?
The name sounds familiar, but did we defeat something like that?
Just then, one of the agents speaks up.
“I think she’s talking about the crazy-huge mechanical lizard Lady Lilith killed the other day. At least, I’m pretty sure that’s what it was called.”
Oh, right, the thing that was protecting the mystery facility. Yeah, I remember that.
“I see. I understand now… When you began settling the woods, I thought you had come up with a way to compete with the Forest King, but to have killed it… Oh dear, this may be an issue…”
Viper appears to be lost in thought, muttering softly to herself.
But it doesn’t sound like something we can ignore.
“Um, Vi, what did that lizard have to do with anything? Should we not have killed it?”
“N-no, well, not exactly…”
Viper hesitates as though the answer is difficult to get out, but her expression says this isn’t something she can avoid talking about.
“I believe the Sand King appeared here because the Forest King is dead.”
……
“The Forest King and the Sand King have been rivals for as long as anyone can remember. They each fight for territory. Eventually, the Forest King settled in the Great Woods near the Grace Kingdom. And the Sand King made the demon territory its domain.”
The agents all go silent at Viper’s words.
If she’s right, there’s something I gotta ask her.
“So, Vi, now that the Forest King’s gone, do you think that mole’s gonna come back here? …Maybe even attack the kingdom of Grace, too?”
“I-I’m afraid so…”
…Rose efficiently cleans up the debris while Tiger Man helps. He also directs an affectionate gaze her way.
The only sounds that can be heard are coming from the people helping with cleanup. Alice, who has somehow managed to restrain the agent she’s been fighting, then quips:
“Yo, Six, time for a report. Make sure Lady Astaroth and Lady Belial get all the juicy details. Don’t forget to put in a punishment request from everyone present.”
[Status Report]
Dear Supreme Leaders,
I hope this letter finds you well.
Lady Lilith, who already caused plenty of problems while here, has retroactively done it again. Please tie her up one more time.
It’s been revealed that the reason Tiger Man’s unit was attacked by the giant mole, also known as the “Sand King,” was because of Lady Lilith.
She killed the “Forest King,” a giant lizard, without putting any serious thought into it, and now the power balance between the two great monsters has collapsed.
It appears, at this rate, there’s a high probability the Sand King will also attack the kingdom of Grace.
In fact, the Sand King attacked our hideout just the other day.
Because the situation is so desperate, we’ve put a temporary hold on the negotiations between the demons and the kingdom. We’ve also paused our investigation into Rose’s origins. We are now pouring all our effort into defeating the Sand King.
As such, all the Combat Agents and mutants assigned to this world request some sort of punishment upon Lady Lilith for leaving us in this situation.
—P.S. Please inform her that if she feels even a shred of guilt, she should send us more portable console games.
Reporting Agent:
Combat Agent Six
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