Combatants Will Be Dispatched - Volume 4 - Chapter 5.1

FINAL CHAPTER 

 To Be the Ideal Boss 

1 

The day after Lilith resolves to get things done. 

All the Combat Agents have assembled in front of our newly constructed hideout. 

Few gathered here have any idea why they’ve been summoned. 

“Very well, all of you, allow me to explain why I’ve ordered you to abandon the front lines and gather here today. So long as you follow my directions, I’ll forgive that none of you came to greet me, a Supreme Leader of the Kisaragi Corporation. I am, after all, a generous and gracious boss. I’m not remotely hurt that you’ve excluded me from your activities, nor do I hold that against you.” 

Standing atop a hastily erected dais, Lilith raises her voice to address the troops. 

It’s pretty obvious from the barbs scattered throughout her remarks that she is, in fact, nursing a grudge, but no one points this out. 

Why? Because Lilith has her game face on today. 

The more senior the agent, the more they put their trust in Lilith when she’s serious. 

“No doubt there are some of you who have seen her around. And no doubt some of you have spoken to her before. But today, I’ll introduce you all to a new Combat Agent Recruit… She’s none other than the Chimera girl standing next to me, Rose!” 

“To everyone I’ve never met, nice to meet you! I’m Rose, a Chimera and Combat Agent Recruit. I’m looking forward to working with all of you!” 

Rose, forced to stand beside Lilith, blushes nervously as she calls out to the gathering. 

As a pattering of applause echoes from the agents, Lilith holds her hand up for silence. 

“Now, obviously, I have not assembled you all merely to introduce you to a new recruit. The Kisaragi Corporation’s leadership is diverse. There is a ruthless ice queen who considers agents expendable. We also have a meathead flame warrior who insists that Combat Agents exist to die in battle and that those who aren’t weak will end up surviving. As for me…” 

Lilith takes a meaningful pause after insulting her colleagues. 

“I, as the Supreme Leader most concerned with the welfare of our Combat Agents, will never abandon or betray you, our precious agents. No doubt you are all aware of this already!” 

Whispers ripple across the gathered agents. 

“When I went to Lady Lilith after spilling ketchup on Lady Astaroth’s uniform, she shooed me away and told me it wasn’t her problem.” 

“One time, she goaded me into playing a practical joke on Lady Belial, telling me it’d be fun to tease a beautiful boss. She sold me out the moment we got caught.” 

Lilith’s brow twitches, as though she’s heard the subdued griping. 

“It seems some of you have something to say. Speak up, then! I’ll make note of your faces and names. You know my intelligence! I never forget a face. I’ll be sure to remember them until the next round of HR evaluations!” says the shitty boss, not even batting an eye at her abuse of authority. 

That’s the sort of thing that guarantees no one votes for her in the various surveys. 

“I will ignore our differing perspectives for now. What I wanted to point out…was the fact that when any of you Combat Agents are harmed by an outside enemy, I will always and immediately strike out to avenge you.” 

This time, no one breathes so much as a word of disagreement. 

As the name Lilith the Black indicates, the reason she maintains something of a following despite her completely rotten personality is the fact that the moment a subordinate is victimized by the enemy, Lilith always pays them back in kind. 

She’s a petty, petulant, and often useless antisocial character with flaws aplenty, but no one here denies her vindictive loyalty to her subordinates. 

“…Now, that should be enough to clue you in to why you’ve been assembled here today, yes?” 

……… 

“Hey, did you follow that?” 

“Yeah… So we’re here to have a welcoming party. We’re gonna have a party with that Chimera girl, I guess.” 

“Oh, gotcha. Guess I’ll head off to the woods and grab us a mokemoke.” 

“A welcoming party? Pretty thoughtful for an antisocial boss. Still not planning on voting for her, though.” 

Lilith’s face flushes, as it appears the point has sailed right over the heads of the assembled agents. 

“Why are you Combat Agents all so uniformly stupid?! Hey, Six! Tell them what we’re about to do!” 

This is why dealing with the lowest level of lackeys is such a headache… 

“Let me make it clear for the dimmest of you lot. Rose is a Chimera who can acquire the abilities of whatever she eats. That means you all need to use your Evil Points to gather rare ingredients…” 

“No! Wrong! Forget it! Why am I surrounded by idiots?! Listen up, all of you: The Demon Lord’s Army has taken over and occupied a place near and dear to Rose’s heart!” 

“Huh?! Um, no, that’s not it, Lady Lilith. We don’t even know if they’ve taken it over. I was just thinking I’d remember more about my past if we visited the spots I marked on the map…” 

Lilith pretends not to hear Rose as she clarifies in a soft voice. 

“Listen up, Combat Agents! She’s the kind of pretty girl you all love! Our new pretty-girl Chimera recruit has had a place dear to her heart taken from her, and now she’s suffering for it! Even you morons know what comes next, right?!” 

“““Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!””” 

Seems it was clear enough for them this time. 

“We’re heading to the Demon Lord’s Castle! Combat Agents, gather your weapons! Tiger Man, organize the rabble!” 

Lilith boldly issues her orders before the excited throng of Combat Agents. 

“To the Demon Lord’s Castle! They won’t know what hit ’em!” 

“Lady Lilith! What happened to talking it out?!” 

Rose’s objection is swallowed by the surge of cheers erupting from the Combat Agents— 

“I will now hand out your assignments for this mission. First, Tiger Man! Lead the Combat Agents and raid the Demon Lord’s Kingdom! During this operation, you are to ignore any movements from the enemy nation of Toris! Even if they take possession of some territory, we can reclaim it later. If we end this war in a single day, they won’t even have time to invade.” 

“So…we’re doing decoy work as usual nyeow?” 

I wish he wouldn’t do that whole meowing thing while saluting with a straight face. 

“Exactly. Your role is to draw the enemy to you. But instead of the usual border skirmish, this time, you’re going to attack the Demon Lord’s Kingdom directly. You’ll need to cause a huge commotion. Can I count on you?” 

“Leave it to me, Meows Lilith! It’s been a while since I’ve led an all-out assault! I can’t wait!” 

Tiger Man wears a cocky smile and cracks his knuckles. 

“We’re counting on you, Tiger Man! And if you call me ‘Meows Lilith’ again, you’re getting tentacled!” 

“Won’t happen again, Meows Lilith!” 

The tentacles immediately grab Tiger Man, hauling him into the air, and he begins meowing out his apologies. 

“Next, Combat Agent Six! You and Rose will come with me.” 

“Roger, Lady Lilith! So we’re your escort, huh?” 

“I’ll do my best to protect you, Lady Lilith!” 

Rose balls up a fist, prompting a faint smile from Lilith. 

Alice rests her shotgun against her shoulder, looking rather pleased as she watches Lilith. 

“And as for you, Alice…” 

“I’m coming with you, of course. It’s too dangerous to leave my useless creator without supervision.” 

Alice interjects before Lilith can give her orders. 

Lilith doesn’t bother responding. She just wears a happy smile. 

…And at that moment. 

“Wait a second, Lady Lilith. We’re attacking the Demon Lord’s Castle this time, right? Then we’d like to participate in the assault instead of just the diversion!” 

“In that case, I wanna go, too.” 

“Yeah. Why does Six always get special treatment anyway?!” 

“Damn thug, it’s unfair he gets the nice gigs because he’s been around longer! Switch places with me, dammit!” 

The dime-a-dozen Combat Agents assigned to be a diversion begin whining. 

Lilith tilts her head a moment, a troubled expression crossing her features… 

“W-well, if that’s what you all want, I suppose you can take over for Six…” 

“Wait, what are you saying, Lady Lilith? There’s no way these weaklings can take over for me, someone who’s served you for so many years. It’s not like these obnoxious lackeys are useful for anything but a diversion anyway. It’s not good leadership to flip-flop on a decision you just made.” 

I quickly interject before Lilith can finish speaking. 

Hearing my tirade, the weakling agents start jeering at me. 

“Ahhh, all right, all right. Six, the rest of you, calm down! I understand your feelings. If all of you are so eager to come with me, you’re all welcome to join! Oh, but Agent Ten, not you. Since you can fly an airplane, you’re responsible for carrying me to the destination.” 

Lilith is unable to suppress a smirk at having her subordinates fawn over her. 

“…Wait, a plane? What sort of mission are you planning if you need Agent Ten to pilot a plane?” 

I can’t help but feel a tinge of anxiety. 

Seems like the other agents feel the same way, with them all going quiet to hear Lilith’s response. 

“Ah, right… Let me give you the key details of the plan. The Combat Agents led by Tiger Man will pick a big fight with the Demon Lord’s Army. They’ll make it as messy and elaborate as possible. Don’t worry about the points needed to request weapons. Go crazy. I’ll cover the point cost. The weapons and ammo are on me today, so don’t hold back!” 

Everyone lets out a cheer at Lilith’s show of confidence. 

Hold on, they get to use as many weapons as they want, and Lilith’s gonna pay for it? I’m starting to want to go with them… 

“As you draw the attention of the Demon Lord’s Army, Agent Ten will pilot a plane to drop the four of us off in the middle of enemy territory. While the enemy lacks modern weaponry, they do have this so-called magic technology, which means they’ll likely have antiair weaponry. Agent Ten will retreat as soon as we drop. He’ll then return to the Grace-Demon Lord’s Army border and provide air support for Tiger Man’s forces.” 

…Upon hearing this, everyone falls into stunned silence while Agent Ten nods in acknowledgment. 

Diving into the middle of the enemy headquarters from the sky. 

Having heard this idiotic plan proposed by the supposed genius Lilith, the Combat Agents, who had been yelling at me a moment earlier, turn away. 

“…Well, then. We’re counting on you, Lady Lilith. I’ll go on the decoy mission, so please come back safely.” 

“Hold it, Six, this is a mission tailor-made for you. You’re the agent with the best survival skills, after all.” 

“Yes. Six has known Lady Lilith the longest. For something big like taking out the Demon Lord, I think you, who came to this planet first, should do the honors.” 

“Heh, you know we were just kidding. There’s no way we’d try to grab the spoils out from under you after all the work you’ve put in.” 

The Combat Agents change their tune at the drop of a hat. 

“What the hell, you bastards?! One of you, trade places with me! I mean, why the hell do I always get the dangerous stuff? Screw that! You know I was sent here when teleporting was most unstable, right?!” 

My desperate attempts at negotiation all fall on deaf ears. 

“Wh-what’s wrong, everyone? You can volunteer to come with me if you want!”