Epilogue 2 Undead Festival
A bit of time has passed since we made Russell solve our water crisis.
After nearly coming to blows with the kingdom of Toris due to an unfortunate series of misunderstandings, it appears relations between the two countries are slowly being repaired. Sounds like we’ll eventually resume things like trade.
Everything seems to be going just great, but…
“I don’t want to see your face, Commander! I’ve had nothing but awful things happen to me since I joined this unit! I go to Toris and get rejected by every guy I talk to, I go to the desert and get mummified, I’m forced to wear socks, I go to the city meetup event and get rejected by every guy I talk to!!”
“Only one of those things has anything to do with me! And how the hell was I supposed to know that would happen with a lousy pair of socks?! If anything, I’m the victim there!”
Grimm’s decided an argument in the middle of the kingdom of Grace training grounds is a great idea.
“Fine, if you’re that upset about it…I’ll request that they give you a transfer…,” I tell her.
Grimm’s eyes go wide…
“Nooooooooooo! Please, Commander, don’t leave me! We’ve been through so much together! You’re not going to just toss me aside after all that, are you? ARE YOU?!”
“You’re the one bitching about everything! What the hell do you want from me?! Since we’re on the subject, most of the time you’re out of the fight before it even starts! You didn’t do a damn thing this last time! You’re fired! Fired!! I’m going to recruit someone more useful! The clumsy magic girl or that old man we were talking about last time…”
Grimm clings to my arm, bawling her eyes out.
“But, Commander! We even went on a date! We’ve seen each other’s underwear! And you’re still going to leave me?! If you do, I’m going to curse yoooou!”
“You’re a piece of work, you know that?! What do you really want?!”
Grimm continues to cry, wailing loudly. “Alice calls me a scammer! And I can’t act during the day, so I can’t do as much as Snow or Rose…! Wait, that’s it! Let me have a chance to prove myself! A situation where I can shine!” she suggests, adding to my headaches, clinging to my sleeve, and showing no sign of letting go.
“A situation where you can shine, huh…? I mean, what can you actually do?”
“How about a wedding venue? You get points for evil deeds, right? So! What if we curse a couple to never be able to marry just as they’re about to exchange their wedding vows…”
And then the backlash from the curse…
“Yeah… I can already see the punch line where you doom yourself to the life of an eternal spinster.”
“Shush! I mean, I feel that’d happen, too, but saying it out loud is just tempting fate!” The loudly obnoxious Grimm is taking my teasing rather seriously.
“Grimm, there you are! It’s an emergency. The princess wishes to see you!” Snow shouts as she runs onto the training ground.
Grimm and I exchange glances.
“Uh-oh. She’s about to fire you…”
“Stop that! You’re making me anxious! But I can guess what the princess wants, given the time of year. Commander, can you wheel me over? I’ll have the princess explain to you just how useful I can be!” Grimm gestures toward me, urging me along.
“C’mon, you two, get moving! The royal oracle says this year’s is going to be the worst on record!” Snow looks a bit more stressed than usual…
“This year’s what? Just what is the worst on record? Grimm, what’s she talking about?”
“That’s for me to know and you to find out. Every woman’s got her secrets, don’t you know?” Grimm chuckles teasingly, poking my nose with her index finger.
………
“When women tease me, I get the urge to strip them naked…”
“I’m sorry! It’s just your cute subordinate being playful!”
Grimm hurriedly puts some space between the two of us, then points to the darkening sky.
“A festival! A lovely festival! The undead festival is upon us!”
[Final Report]
Agent 6 has succeeded in damaging the relations between the kingdom of Grace and one of its neighbors.
We’ve achieved the territorial expansion quota for Kisaragi by escalating this situation into a war.
During said war, we captured a business competitor’s mutant. Said mutant is currently under Tiger Man’s command. According to the information from this mutant, this planet once had a super-advanced civilization.
While we were unable to recover the methods of creating Chimeras or other useful information during our last operations, we are now aware that the presence of creatures (such as giant magical monsters) that could not have evolved on their own is due to said ancient civilization.
We will now focus our attention on securing any remaining facilities belonging to this ancient civilization and continue investigations.
Additionally, it appears that this planet holds an event called an Undead Festival during this time of year.
As a pinnacle of technological achievement, I believe it’s my mission to disrupt an event so steeped in superstition and the supernatural. I will report on these activities at a later date.
Final Reporting Operative
Supernatural Buster, Alice Kisaragi
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