Can Someone Please Go After My Sister!?!?! - Chapter 29

Relief

There was an underwear thief in our area. It happened half a month ago.

We live in a low-cost residential area, and many people's balconies are not big enough, so they hang their underwear outside. However, girls' underwear is frequently stolen.

At one point, many people suspected that the security guard, Uncle Qiu, committed the crime. However, apart from pretending to be a ghost and telling fortunes to make extra money, he didn't seem to be a bold and cruel person.

Furthermore, it is not only young girls whose underwear is stolen, but also middle-aged women’s underwear is frequently missing.

Years of poor hygiene habits have caused their bloated breasts to sag severely, and they have started using fashionable bras.

I don't know much about underwear, and I don't know whether they are G or F, but I only know that people who have seen their appearance must have no interest in those fabrics that are the size of a large supermarket shopping bag...

This also ruled out the possibility that Uncle Qiu committed the crime - he was just an ordinary fortune-teller, a monster from the Cultural Revolution period. Stealing underwear? The size of the aunt's underwear could be used as shorts for him.

Moreover, when he was fortune-telling on the street, he often took advantage of beautiful girls by taking people's pulses and reading their palms - one must master a skill in order to survive, he taught me proudly.

Fuck you!

My words aroused the rage of the middle-aged women: Damn it, do you know how hard it is for me to buy a bra? Sometimes I have to make it custom-made for such a big bra. You thief, I will beat you to death today!

The stalker saw how aggressive everyone was and suddenly lost his temper. He looked at me tremblingly, like a sparrow that fell into water.

I winked at him. "Come on, where did you hide your underwear?"

He looked like he was about to cry: "I didn't! How could I steal..." He looked guiltily at the angry aunties around him, but he didn't dare to say words like 'obasan'.

"The sea of ​​suffering is boundless, there is no turning back." An old voice came from behind me. I turned around and saw, wow, isn't this the security guard, Uncle Qiu?

Uncle Qiu squinted his eyes and touched his goatee - he grew it specifically for the purpose of committing fraud.

I have also seen other similar equipment in his house, from a Feng Shui compass, an erhu played with sunglasses to pretend to be a blind man, fake antiques from the Tang, Song, Yuan, Ming and Qing dynasties, to banners with the words "Save the dying and heal the wounded". There were all kinds of dirty stuff.

The old man's business scope is so wide and his props are so abundant that it is almost amazing. I once suspected that "Shensuan Qiu", "Wonderful Doctor Zhang" and "Gu Gu Li" and other well-known monsters in the city were all disguised as the old man in a different outfit.

I bet that if the police seize the south gate information room of our community during a crackdown, this old man will probably have to pay so much fine that he will be left with only his underwear.

Well... now that he says so, he does have a reason to steal the underwear, haha.

Almost all the naughty kids around know him and think he is very funny. Sometimes they treat all kinds of stones and garbage as treasures to fool the old man.

"Grandpa Qiu, I found a piece of 'jade' by the river. Look, it's very fine and translucent. Is it worth money?"

The old man looked at the black stone that looked like sheep dung in the sunlight and laughed out loud in anger.

"Little boy, go home and look up the meaning of 'delicate and exquisite' in the dictionary."

"Grandpa Qiu, do you think this counterfeit currency from the Cultural Revolution period has any collection value?"

"Pah, from which era are counterfeit coins worth collecting?"

"Grandpa Qiu, can I sell this strange rock in my collection? This little piece is so beautiful!"

"Sure. If you have a few tons, I can get you in touch with the contractor at the construction site."

"Master Yue, please take a look at this Guanyin statue. There is a seal with the words 'Made by Emperor Qianlong' underneath. I bought it for 100,000 yuan. Do you think it is expensive?"

"If the carver dared to make something like this back then, Emperor Qianlong would have destroyed his family long ago."

Conversations like these happen every day...

No, I must find a chance to introduce Wang Er to him as his apprentice.

The old man walked into the crowd and looked at the trembling stalker.

"Put the knife away."

He did as he was told.

"Did you steal the underwear?"

"Unless I die..."

"You are still young, don't do bad things..."

The stalker pointed at me with a look of despair: "I'm only here to see him!"

I curled my lips. Oh, you really think Liu Shitong is your own? I have to teach you a lesson.

I laughed smugly. "Hmph, you still have the nerve to come to my house? You follow my wife all day long, do you have any shame?"

Everyone was in an uproar, and the stalker looked desperate: "Wife?"

I put my hands on my hips proudly, determined to make this guy give up completely: "Yes, I have done everything I should do, except getting the marriage certificate."

His lips turned pale and he looked like he was about to faint.

"Good!" Old Man Qiu patted my shoulder proudly, "Young people should be full of vigor and pick flowers as they come."

Aunt Wang next to him glanced at Old Man Qiu's crotch and snorted coldly.

"So just give up! Liu Shitong and I love each other and will be together till death. I..."

Huh? Why do everyone look a little weird?

Why is everyone looking at my back?

I turned my head in confusion and opened my mouth blankly.

Peach, Taoyao?

My sister stood outside the crowd with her hands on her hips and a sneer on her face, quietly watching me in the midst of this farce.

"Go on, go on."

My tongue seemed to be tied in a knot: "Well, Taoyao, I was just talking nonsense, don't misunderstand me."

Tao Yao glanced at the stunned crowd around her, and in line with the principle of not airing family disgrace in public, she glared at me fiercely and said, "I'll deal with you when I get home!"

I froze there like a stone statue.

The aunties around me were whispering to each other and looking at me with malicious smiles.

"A man with ambitions is not old, he can still have women on both sides! Uncle Qiu looked at me meaningfully, "Yushan, I'll tell you a fortune some other day. You're too lucky in love when you're young, so you have to be restrained. I'll charge you 20 yuan, which is a price for acquaintances. If you have kidney deficiency, I have a prescription from Wudang Mountain here to replenish your kidneys..."

You should cure your impotence first, I thought maliciously.

The stalker stared blankly at Tao Yao's receding figure, his voice trembling: "That's, your sister?"

I nodded. “Yes.”

Unexpectedly, this guy suddenly ran over and hugged me, crying bitterly.

I was so frightened that I almost kicked him - I thought he was going to stab me with a knife out of hatred.

"Amazing! Godly man!"

"What’s wrong with you……"

"Not only can you win over goddesses, but you also have such a proud sister at home... Big brother, I'm determined to follow you! Please teach me how to seduce girls! Please."

I smiled and helped him up, as if I were a kind senior: "I see that you are weak and listless...ah, full of energy, so I told you this specially. In fact, women are the ones who understand women the best."

"Yeah." He nodded like a chicken pecking at rice.

"So," I patted his shoulder regretfully, "If you want to practice this skill, you must castrate yourself first. Good luck."

"...Boss, I don't know how to flirt with girls, but I'm not stupid..."

"Uh... I was wrong." I scratched my head awkwardly. Can you at least complain about it?

"Forget it, as long as you stop bothering Liu Shitong..."

"If you dare to attack my sister-in-law, I'll stab you with three cuts and six holes!"

"And I have no evil thoughts towards my sister..."

He obviously hesitated for a moment, but still gritted his teeth and said, "I want the magic skill but not my junior sister."

"Then come to the club activity room on the first floor of the second dormitory at school at nine o'clock tomorrow morning."

The stalker nodded gratefully, bowed his head to apologize to the aunties, and disappeared into the darkness of the neighborhood.

I sighed silently.

What kind of people are joining NYH now?