Sasaki and Peeps - Volume 8 - Chapter 4.3

<The Neighbor’s POV>

On Sunday, Robot Girl and I go to our classmate’s house. The blue magical girl is with us, too.

This all started when our classmates invited us to hang out, just as they had for the earlier welcome parties. Several boys personally reached out to us, so Robot Girl agreed at once. She’s a total pushover when it comes to things like this. The blue magical girl and I got roped into it as well, of course.

We’re supposed to meet at the house of a wealthy classmate—the same one who hosted the last welcome party.

After setting up in the living room, we start playing party games. Aside from the three of us, there are four boys and three girls—the same students who always hang around my desk.

“Whoo-hoo! I win again!”

“Why are the boys doing so well? Don’t you think it’s kinda suspicious?”

“Probably because the winner gets to tell the person in last place what to do.”

“Who came in last?”

“Me. Heh. Sorry.”

“Ugh, are you serious? What was all my hard work for, then?!”

“Oh. So that’s why.”

“I don’t like how the boys have been looking at us.”

“Yeah. Hey, if you say anything weird, we’ll kick you out of the room!”

“I’ll protect you from the boys, Kurosu!”

“Ivy, if you ever need any help, just tell us, okay?”

Come to think of it, I’ve never played video games with friends before. Honestly, it’s not much fun.

Robot Girl, however, is having the time of her life. One of the girls has taken over managing the party and tells Robot Girl that she gets to replace the boy who just lost. As soon as she hears this, she happily reaches for the controller.

“My turn has come at last,” she says. “It is torturous waiting when matches go long.”

“Wouldn’t it be easy for you to win every time?” I ask.

“Now that I have learned the happiness of being sought after by others, the treatment reserved for the loser entices me more than the special privilege of the winner. I sense love behind the curious gazes directed at me. Ah, what a wondrous thing love is. It is truly a salve for the heart.”

“……”

I think Robot Girl is getting love mixed up with lust. Then again, I hear plenty of women do that.

“Personally, I’m a little concerned about the youngest daughter’s future.”

Abaddon is with us, too. He floats right next to me, bobbing up and down like always.

He has hidden himself, so I can’t respond to his comment. It stresses me out having to listen to the demon’s sardonic banter in silence. But this time, I agree with him.

My main concern is how this will affect my relationship with my neighbor. I don’t really care what lewd things Robot Girl gets up to. But I know he wouldn’t approve.

“Okay, so Miyano, you got first place. Murata came in last, so you can give him one order.”

“Could you hop over to the convenience store and get some snacks?”

“Yikes. Plain, boring, and a pain in the butt.”

“Oh! In that case, I can come with you.”

“The convenience store… Wasn’t there a terrorist incident around there yesterday?”

“Wait, what?”

“I didn’t see anything on the news.”

“My grandpa lives nearby. He said he saw lots of police and JSDF soldiers.”

“For real? No way.”

“Don’t some of the kids at our school use that road to commute?”

They must be talking about what happened at my neighbor’s job. Yesterday at dinner, he and his coworker told us all about it.

Apparently, the blue magical girl was there, too. I steal a glance at her, but she doesn’t seem troubled in the least—her expression seems to say she knows nothing about it, and she smiles as she watches her classmates discuss the matter.

Her appearance and behavior make her seem innocent and pure, but there’s another side to her personality. From what I was told, she has the power to understand any foreign language. My neighbor warned me not to carelessly discuss secret information in front of her. She’s practically a spy. On second thought, there’s no practically about it.

“Hey, we have our off-campus class next week. Is everyone ready?”

“I’m so excited I bought a whole new outfit!”

“My mom bought me a bag for it.”

“Must be nice. My parents didn’t do anything like that.”

“Time to find a sugar daddy, right?”

“Oh, maybe I should.”

“One of the third-years apparently does stuff like that all the time.”

“As long as you’re a minor, you’re invincible!”

There are a lot of people here, and the topic changes come hard and fast. The video game is paused on the stage selection screen. Robot Girl still holds her controller, watching the TV and fidgeting.

Something they said has caught my attention, though: the words ‘off-campus class.’ Apparently, some sort of event is going to happen in the next few days.

Robot Girl visibly reacts to this news as well. Her gaze shifts from the TV to the other students.

“Excuse me,” she says. “I would like to know the details of this ‘off-campus class.’”

Immediately, the boys start explaining.

“Oh, that’s right! You just got here, Twelve. I guess you don’t know.”

“We go somewhere different every year, but we might just do skiing classes again like last time.”

“Isn’t skiing kind of passé?”

“Do you know how to ski, Twelve?”

A ring of boys naturally forms around Robot Girl.

She’s only been here a few days, and she already has practically everyone simping for her. The reason is probably her otherworldly beauty. Her features are particularly attractive, even compared to the blue magical girl. Obviously, she’s much prettier than me, too. She’s actually a robot inside, but only the transfer students and a handful of faculty members know that.

Meanwhile, the girls all start chattering about this off-campus class.

“Hey, you know that rumor? They say that on the last day of off-campus class, if you confess to the one you love, your love will bear fruit.”

“Didn’t Nishino in Class 2-A do that last year? That’s how she started dating Takeuchi, right?”

“Andou from Class 2-C started dating after off-campus class, too.”

“They’re both so quiet. It must have taken a lot of courage.”

“Hey, it’ll be our turn next! We’ve gotta do our best!”

The sharp-eared alien turns to look at the other girls. The night before last, she spoke about something similar at dinner. I hope she doesn’t come up with any more annoying ideas.

“Love will bear fruit?” she repeats. “I cannot ignore those words.”

“Are you interested, Twelve?”

“Hey, what about me? I’m available and quite a catch.”

“Doesn’t saying that now count as sexual harassment?”

“I want to know her type, though.”

“I bet she likes older guys.”

“Yeah, what if she isn’t interested in boys our age?”

“I am very interested in the concept of love. At present, love is my most crucial mission. I will spare no effort to obtain the most appealing romance. I would like to approach the matter with a wide view and not limit myself in regard to any specific attribute.”

This excites the girls.

“Wow, that’s pretty frank. You know the boys can hear you, right?”

“Wait, does that mean you’re already into someone?”

“Hey, for real?!”

“It couldn’t be someone in our class, could it?”

“Did they come here with you?”

“I’m so curious! Are they hot? Are they older? Are they an adult?”

“I have no specific partner. I would like to make the most worthwhile decision after a close examination of all potential options.”

Just as we discussed the night before last, Robot Girl shows great and awful potential for this sort of thing. I fear the day is near when she is surrounded by fuckboys and spending her days steeped in hedonism.

It was Sunday at last. Type Twelve said she was going to hang out with friends from school that day, and so Futarishizuka and I were released from our pretend family duties and free to enjoy our first real day off in some time. We spent it lazing around at Ms. Futarishizuka’s villa. It was the greatest day off ever. I didn’t even have to worry about going to the otherworld.

Type Twelve and the others stayed out until evening, so we got together for our family dinner after sunset. In response to the favorable reception the day before, Lady Elsa took up her position in the kitchen once again. Today’s meal was even more delicious.

Finally, the week came to an end, and it was Monday again. After arriving at work first thing in the morning, Futarishizuka and I headed for our desks in the faculty room.

“For some bizarre reason, I feel refreshed and ready to work,” said Ms. Futarishizuka.

“That’s funny,” I replied. “I’ve been in a lively mood myself ever since waking up.”

It was probably all the good rest we’d gotten on Sunday. I was so animated I felt like I was a teen again and full of energy. In fact, I even felt up to a little dodgeball out in the schoolyard during our twenty-minute break. I wanted to run around the neighborhood for no reason at all.

Just then, Ms. Mochizuki approached us. “You two really have what it takes to be teachers!”

“Oh. Good morning, Ms. Mochizuki.”

“I don’t know about that,” said Ms. Futarishizuka. “The little urchins have been treating me like a child for days.”

“Teachers have to get used to starting pretty early in the day, or else they’ll never be able to keep at it!”

“I did get the vague feeling that was the case, yes,” I replied.

“Just two months ago, I regularly slept through the morning and woke up past noon,” remarked Ms. Futarishizuka.

“Mr. Sasaki, if you want, we can plan to do something together before work each day.”

“Oh, I don’t think I can make it here any earlier…”

Ever since the welcome party, Ms. Mochizuki had been really aggressive about talking to me. Almost every time I saw her in the faculty room, she’d come over. In fact, she sent messages every day to my work number, as well. Most of it was about our jobs, of course, but there were a few more personal tidbits here and there. She was 100 percent in honey trap mode.

Just now, I’d only barely stopped myself from thoughtlessly agreeing to her suggestion. I very quickly shut my mouth. What “something” could she possibly be suggesting?

As I’d said to Futarishizuka, I felt awfully energetic for so early in the morning. In fact, I had the urge to go up to everyone in the faculty room and greet each of them individually. I had to consciously suppress the impulse. What was this feeling?

I was reminded of the time I’d felt an incredible lust toward my neighbor. This was weaker, but the sensation of it swirling restlessly in my chest was somehow similar.

“What’s with you?” Ms. Futarishizuka asked Ms. Mochizuki. “Are you into men like him?”

“Calm, mature men are very enticing for somebody my age, you know,” she explained.

“Isn’t he just old? Who knows if he can even get it up?”

“It’s a little early for sexual harassment, don’t you think?” I shot back.

In the meantime, the principal arrived through the door at the front of the room, where the whiteboard was located. He walked a few steps toward the supervisor’s desk, where the vice principal was sitting.

The person behind him sure looks familiar, I thought. It was a young woman wearing awfully thick makeup.

“I have an announcement,” said the principal, looking across the room.

The entire faculty stopped their conversations.

He continued, gesturing to the one beside him. “This is Miss Hoshizaki, a new custodian who will be working at our school starting today. I doubt you will see much of each other, but I hope you will greet her every day and work together to achieve a more harmonious school environment.”

“Hello, my name is Hoshizaki. It’s a pleasure to be working here.”

At the principal’s prompting, she bowed once.

There was no doubt about it. That was our coworker.

She’d shed her suit and tie for a workman’s clothes; she now wore a light green jacket and pants, each covered in pockets. It was the kind of functional outfit you saw on factory workers and the like.

“It looks like our dear senior has finally given up and swallowed her pride,” remarked Ms. Futarishizuka.

“I’m curious how she persuaded the chief.”

“I bet you’d like to push a naive high school girl like her into bed, yes? Or perhaps you’d prefer a boy. You’d greet her the next day like nothing happened, only to call out to her after school again…”

“Ms. Futarishizuka, could you please refrain from making any more comments like that?”

My junior colleague was really pushing it with the sexual harassment today. She was talking like it was the 1970s. Come to think of it, if people were that raunchy back then, what were they like in the 1920s, the 1880s, or the 1700s? Heck, what about the Warring States period or the Azuchi-Momoyama period? Was everyone thinking about sex back then?

I found myself surprised by my own thoughts. Where was I going with this? Why was I thinking about Oda Nobunaga and Toyotomi Hideyoshi’s sex lives?

At this rate, I couldn’t criticize Ms. Futarishizuka. Why was my mind spinning like this?

“Vice Principal, would you mind showing Miss Hoshizaki around the school? I have a meeting to get to, and I don’t think I’ll be back until this afternoon. Everything is as I mentioned in my phone call.”

“Yes, sir. No problem.”

After a simple self-introduction to the faculty, Miss Hoshizaki was pulled away by the vice principal. She glanced in our direction as she left. Our eyes totally met. Her stubborn desire to chase after any bonus pay she could get her hands on was honestly inspiring.

The principal followed the vice principal out of the faculty room, after which the teachers began gossiping.

“I’ve never seen such a young custodian before.”

“Neither have I. She must be about twenty.”

“She’s covering a lot up with makeup, but she’s definitely young.”

“Why the sudden influx of people anyway?”

“I’ve been curious about that, too.”

Most custodians tend to be on the older side. Miss Hoshizaki sticks out like a sore thumb.

We didn’t have another chance to see her after that, and then morning homeroom began. I headed to Class 1-A at the warning bell. After that, I’d have to go around to various classes teaching math. A teacher’s life was full of toil.

Once morning classes and lunch were over, it was time for afternoon break. The students all left their classrooms and scattered throughout the school.

We teachers, in contrast, gathered in the faculty room to relax. Today, though, Futarishizuka and I went to the administrative office instead. Apparently, forty or fifty years ago, a lot of janitors lived in the schools they worked for. Nowadays, places like night duty rooms and janitorial offices were things of the past, so janitors could typically be found in the administrative office.

However, our senior coworker was nowhere to be seen.

When we asked a clerk who happened to be there, she said the new janitor had gone to a nearby convenience store to buy lunch. I could imagine my senior colleague dashing out the door, eager to get to work, and totally forgetting to bring her lunch.

In that case, we could simply check her location data on our bureau-provided phones. We caught sight of her moving leisurely toward the school and decided to wait for her near the gate.

“Last week was busy, wasn’t it? I hope today ends without issue,” I said.

“Ah! You just raised a death flag! Now we’re doomed. I bet you did that on purpose, didn’t you? Didn’t you?!”

“Could you say something normal for once? It’s so hard to talk to you.”

“Ah, stop! That’s too brutal. It’s even worse because I know you’re right.”

“I apologize. But I wish you’d stop making entertainment media references from generations ago.”

“Urk… Flags…? They’re still a standard meme, aren’t they?”

What’s going on? I wondered. Normally, I’d have hesitated to say something like that, but today, my mouth was moving on its own. I felt bad, but at the same time, I was kind of loving it. Seeing Ms. Futarishizuka struggling to react delighted me. I started wanting to bully her even more. Her reactions seemed a little off, too.

Both of us had already finished eating our packed lunches—wyvern bentos prepared by Lady Elsa. She’d had some extra ingredients from the otherworld leftover and suggested the idea herself. She’d also put the soup Ms. Futarishizuka and I liked so much in thermoses. It remained incredibly delicious. Both of us had drunk every last drop.

“Oh, there’s our esteemed senior now,” said my junior colleague.

We watched as someone came walking toward us. Apparently, Miss Hoshizaki had gone out in her work clothes. Any other Tokyo high school girl would have taken one look at that outfit, called it old-guy clothes, and refused to wear it. Recently, I’d heard that more and more kids were choosing which school to attend based on how cute its uniforms were. Going against the times like this was so terribly like our senior.

“Sasaki? And Futarishizuka?” She seemed to notice us, and ran over. “Did you come all the way out here just to see me?”

“That janitor getup suits you better than I expected,” remarked Ms. Futarishizuka.

“I’m sure you didn’t go behind the chief’s back to do this, right?” I said.

“Of course not. He was the one who sent me here.”

Her outfit didn’t seem to bother her in the least. She stood right in front of the gate as she answered my question.

“Last week, you guys were attacked by several other organizations, right?” she continued. “Some of the bureau employees were hurt, and I’m taking over for them. I am a rank-B psychic, you know. Got it?”

“Ah, I see.”

“I’m sure you complained until he was forced to give in,” said Ms. Futarishizuka.

“N-no, I didn’t!”

It looked like our junior colleague was right. Was this okay, though? Our senior was drifting further and further away from her life as a high school student, and that made me anxious.

“What about you two?” she asked. “Should you be loitering around out here?”

“Hey, teachers are free to use their afternoon breaks however they like,” said Ms. Futarishizuka.

“Really? I didn’t think being a teacher was such a laid-back job.”

“It isn’t,” I said. “It most certainly isn’t.”

“Indeed,” agreed Ms. Futarishizuka. “After all, he has the pick of the litter when it comes to middle school girls. He hasn’t a moment to waste. He should really learn from his predecessor in the big house and enjoy the spring of youth to his heart’s content.”

“Ms. Futarishizuka, is it just me, or is your sexual harassment much worse than usual today?”

“Do you think so? Well, I won’t deny that I’ve felt quite chipper since this morning.”

“You harass people more when you’re chipper?” asked Miss Hoshizaki. “God, you’re the real old man.”

Now that we’d met up with our coworker, we turned back toward the school building. But as soon as we did, we heard a tearing noise in the air. A Magical Field appeared, and Magical Pink popped out of it.

She dropped from several meters in the air like it was nothing and lightly fluttered down to the ground right next to Ms. Futarishizuka. A moment later, she readied her wand and performed some kind of magical-looking gesture.

Instantly, the scenery around her twisted. She’d probably turned on her Magical Barrier.

“Miss Hoshizaki, over here!” I called, immediately stepping forward to protect her. I deployed my barrier spell as well.

“What is the magic girlie doing here?” asked Ms. Futarishizuka.

“They asked me to come,” replied the girl.

“Asked you? Who? What do they want you to do?” Ms. Futarishizuka remained detached and calm, but at the same time, she was maintaining a watchful eye on her surroundings and keeping up her guard.

We’d just battled with Magical Pink the day before yesterday. We’d been blessed with several opportunities to fight alongside her lately, but her main objective had never changed: She was out to eliminate psychics. There was a distinct possibility she’d go after our coworkers at the bureau. Our friendly relationship was thus extremely precarious.

“They told me to put my Barrier on you,” she said.

“Huh? What for?” asked Ms. Futarishizuka.

Contrary to my expectations, the magical girl had revealed something surprising.

Ms. Futarishizuka stared blankly, unable to comprehend. That Barrier was a tool for defense. And defending was a friendly act. My junior colleague, on the receiving end, wasn’t sure how to take the gesture. Miss Hoshizaki and I were just as flummoxed.

“They said if I listen to them, they’ll tell me where the psychics’ hideout is.”

“Oh, really?” said Ms. Futarishizuka. “And?”

“If I know where the psychics are hiding, I can kill lots of them.”

It seemed like many different organizations were approaching Magical Pink—much like Type Twelve and ourselves. Considering how other magical girls were kept under tight guard by their respective states, I was sure plenty of groups were eager to endear themselves to this freelancer.

“But what will happen to me now that I’m in this Barrier?” asked Ms. Futarishizuka.

“I don’t know. They didn’t say anything about that.”

“That’s not very thorough of you.”

Come to think of it, the magical girl’s Magical Barrier had effects other than defense—something it shared with my own barrier spell and a major source of headaches for us. I suddenly had a very bad feeling.

“Ms. Futarishizuka, do you think an isolated space is—”

—about to appear? But before I could finish my sentence, all sound disappeared from our surroundings.

“Oh, they got us good,” muttered Ms. Futarishizuka, sounding fed up. “I never thought they’d ask the magic girlie for something like this.”

“Still, my neighbor and Abaddon are right nearby,” I pointed out.

“I don’t know. Perhaps they’re confident in how fast they can scurry away.”

Someone had gone to great trouble to ask the magical girl to drag Ms. Futarishizuka into an isolated space. She had to be their target. And if they’d used my neighbor and Abaddon to create the space, we were up against an angel and their Disciple.

As we stared out across the silent world, Magical Pink said, “I know this feeling. It’s the same as that island the other day.” She sounded suspicious.

“You sold us out, didn’t you?” asked Ms. Futarishizuka.

“I didn’t sell you out. I just did what they asked.”

“That’s a matter of perspective.”

“No use crying over spilled milk,” I said. “Anyway, we should hurry and find my neighbor and Abaddon. Depending on how strong the Disciple and their angel are, every second could put us in more danger.”

That bad feeling of mine hadn’t gone away—and soon, it turned out to be right on the money. An angel was approaching us from the sky.

“That angel with a bunch of wings,” said Magical Pink. “You all fought it before.”

“Oh, don’t act so innocent,” said Ms. Futarishizuka.

“Maybe they sent someone other than the Disciple to negotiate with her,” I suggested.

“You’re right,” said Magical Pink. “Someone else told me about the psychics’ hideout.”

Little Mika, the tough-looking angel with six wings, was here. We couldn’t beat her—not in an isolated space, at least. We needed to meet up with Abaddon immediately.

“In any case, we need to retreat,” I suggested.

“Agreed,” said my junior colleague.

“Futarishizuka, you’re with me and a magical girl, and you still want to run away?” Miss Hoshizaki asked. “There’s only one of them. As long as we’re smart about it, we can take her down. I’m rank B now. If you just make me some water, we can put up quite a fight.”

“I think our esteemed senior needs a beating to knock her down a peg.”

“Miss Hoshizaki, that angel is on a totally different level,” I said. “Please come with us.”

Some enemies simply couldn’t be defeated, no matter how much one struggled. Peeps and the nerd were obvious examples, as were Abaddon and Little Mika when inside isolated spaces. They were in a different dimension in terms of strength. In a shounen manga, they would have been the main character’s master—unrivaled right from the start. Your whole family would have to die before you could have a chance at beating them. Miss Hoshizaki had no idea.

All the while, the six-winged angel was speeding toward us.

Magical Pink readied her wand. She must have been telling the truth when she said she didn’t mean to sell us out. At the very least, she hadn’t realized the one pulling the strings was an old enemy of ours. She’d simply accepted the deal because she wanted to know where the psychics were. And Miss Hoshizaki and I just so happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Little Mika descended right in front of us, stopping several meters off the ground. She looked down at our group, that familiar, overblown sword in her hand. “You’ve helped us,” she said to the magical girl. “So I have no intention of harming you. Don’t get in my way.”

“What are you going to do to the magical middle-aged man?” asked Magical Pink.

“I do not know of any magical middle-aged men. I am here only for that small human there.”

The angel’s gaze shifted to Ms. Futarishizuka. I was right—our junior colleague was the angel’s target.

“Why do you get special treatment from the magic girlie?” Ms. Futarishizuka asked me. “It’s not fair.”

“This is really not the time for that,” I replied.

“……”

Magical Pink seemed troubled by what Little Mika had said. Ms. Futarishizuka was a psychic, someone she wanted to kill, not someone she’d risk herself to ally with. But perhaps all the battles we’d fought together lately had given her pause.

“But I am in a hurry,” Little Mika continued. “If you stand in my way, I will eliminate you.”

The angel swung her sword down at Magical Pink. The tip shattered her Magical Barrier in a single blow, just as it had my barrier spell. With a shrill noise, pieces shot out in all directions. It was as though a big glass window had broken, and each shard distorted the scenery behind it.

“Ngh…”

Magical Pink immediately pulled back but not quickly enough to avoid a small slice near her chest. Her brow furrowed in pain.

I’d taken a similar strike myself once before—and it had literally cut me in half. Little Mika must have been holding back because Magical Pink had helped her.

Nevertheless, she’d still injured the girl. She was a terrifying opponent.

“Stay there,” said the angel. “Or I’ll have your head next.”

She then lunged toward Ms. Futarishizuka, passing by Magical Pink in the process. As she did, this magical middle-aged man finished preparing his laser beam spell.

I fired it without restraint at the six-winged angel, squeezing my attack down to the thickness of a telephone pole and setting it on a straight course toward her.

“Ack…”

“You two, head inside and meet up with the others!” I shouted.

My spell struck the angel’s sword. I’d put everything I had into that shot, and while it managed to knock the weapon from her hands, I’d done zero damage to the angel. When the beam hit her blade, she’d easily dodged out of the way.

“If they chose now to come after me, then they must have an informant at school!” complained Ms. Futarishizuka.

“I’d say that’s pretty likely,” I replied.

It seemed I’d rushed things a little to protect my coworker, however. A moment later, the six-winged girl dashed at me, unarmed.