4
When Rem was summoned by the bell, an unexpected array of faces awaited her.
“You summoned me, Master Roswaal…? And Great Spirit.”
It was nighttime at Roswaal Manor, on the terrace of the top floor. There, waiting for Rem, was Roswaal, reclining in a chair, and the spirit Puck, lounging on the table in front of him.
A mage in clown makeup and a spirit who took the form of a small gray cat… The mansion housed many beings beyond human comprehension, but among them, these two in particular humbled Rem.
“You really do come right away the moment you’re called, don’t you?” Puck remarked. “But you don’t need to shrink so much in our presence. Then again, it’ll be really hard for you to shrink smaller than me.”
“My deepest apologies,” Rem replied. “I wish I possessed the skill to shrink to meet your expectations, Great Spirit…”
“Dooon’t take it so literally, Rem. The Great Spirit was speaking in jest.”
“Yup, just a little spirit humor. Not like spirits really get humor, either.”
Puck wrapped his extra-long tail around himself and cackled merrily. Directly beneath Puck’s feet—on top of the round table—sat a glass of amber liquid. Its twin sat in Roswaal’s hand, meaning there could only be one reason they were together.
“The Great Spirit and I were enjoying a little drink. Subaru was kind enough to unearth this heirloom liquor, after all. As a Mathers, I have a duuuty to test the merits of my ancestors. But in doing so, we sadly ran out of snaaacks.”
Puck added, “We wanted to call the matron of this fine establishment over, so we decided to call you. Sorry?”
“Matron…isn’t that what they call important women in Kararagi?”
“Rem, what did I just saaay? Dooon’t take everything the Great Spirit says at face value.”
Rem gave her master a respectful bow in acknowledgment. Puck, meanwhile, stuck out his tongue and made a playful noise, but Roswaal remained indifferent to his antics.
That being said, Rem quickly understood why she had been summoned.
“Understood, Master. I’ll fetch some snacks right away. Any particular requests?”
“Nooo, I trust you.”
“I want mayonnaise! Mayonnaise would hit the spot!”
Once she took their requests, Rem scurried off to the kitchen, mentally reviewing the leftover ingredients. Drinking snacks and mayonnaise—of the two, the latter had become a household staple.
Most of the manor’s residents enjoyed the condiment that Subaru had introduced. Rem wasn’t particularly fond of strong, vinegary tastes, but since everyone else—especially Subaru—loved it, she always kept it in stock. Emilia, Puck, and Beatrice also liked it, so she made an effort to incorporate it into her dishes.
Most drinkers weren’t picky about their snacks. Rem retrieved some fish from the pantry, kept chilled by a magic stone, quickly grilled a fillet, and topped it with mayonnaise.
When she returned, Puck looked up from washing his face and said, “Mmm, that smells good. It’s stirring my instincts.”
Though he looked like a cat, Puck was a spirit at heart. Still, his mannerisms and preferences were distinctly feline. Suppressing a laugh, Rem set the plates down on the table.
“If you leave the plates and glasses when you’re done, I’ll clear them later. If there’s nothing else, I’ll take my leave…”
“Thank you, Rem. Yeees, you may turn in for the night…is what I’d like to say, but you’re going to keep us company instead.”
Rem’s expression stiffened slightly. “Understood, Master. Um, but I don’t—”
“I am weeell aware that you don’t drink,” Roswaal said with a chuckle. He then set his glass on the opposite side of the table, away from Rem. “Even the smell doesn’t agree with you. We’d better put a little distance between you and it.”
Though it shamed her as an oni, Rem could not hold her liquor. oni were supposedly a race of hearty drinkers, or so the stories said. When she lived in the village where she was born, she often saw adults binge drinking and celebrating with alcohol. Unlike Rem, Ram could drink like a fish and be completely unaffected—she was a true oni.
“You twins are opposites in everything, aren’t youuu? It surprises me that Ram’s cheeks don’t even flush, but you surprise me in a different way. After all, you manage to use alcohol just fine when you’re cooking.”
Rem lowered her head in apology. “When I’m cooking, I cut out all unnecessary distractions—it’s a matter of focus. But when I’m at the dining table, there’s no sense of urgency, so…”
Puck continued chomping on his snack while his chin was smeared with mayonnaise. “Yeah, you and Lia were all over each other at that party. It was really cute, though. I wish you both could learn to drink in moderation.”
The event Puck referred to was the stargazing party held at Roswaal Manor a few days prior, which was well-lubricated thanks to the hidden cache of liquor Subaru had found.
Rem had made quite the scene.
“I truly apologize for the disgraceful way I behaved that night…”
“Nah, blushing and cuddling with Lia was cute. Neither Betty nor I can get drunk even if we want to…well, I guess that’s not exactly right. Her circumstances are a bit different from mine.”
Rem was unsure how to react to the heartfelt tone in Puck’s voice.
Noticing her silence, Puck nodded and said, “I see you’ve learned to show discomfort when you feel that way—I think that’s a good thing.”
His words startled Rem even more, but by the time she raised a hand to her cheek, Puck had already shifted his attention back to his plate.
“It’s the same with jokes, but someone with a fickle personality can be hard to understand,” Roswaal agreed. “The trick is to not worry too much and simply keep a suitable distance.”
The flustered Rem nodded at Roswaal’s advice and turned to face him. “That sounds difficult, but I’ll try my best. So, Master Roswaal…”
Understanding immediately what she was implying, the ever-perceptive marquis responded, “I feel bad making you stay here for so long when it reeks of alcohol. Yes, let’s cut to the chaaase… It’s about Subaru’s health.”
“What’s wrong with him, Master?”
“It’s his Gate—it’s in exceedingly bad shape from the strain he put it through in the forest.”
Roswaal’s tone wasn’t overly grim, but there was an unmistakable weight to it. During the demon beast incident in the forest surrounding the manor, Subaru had pushed his mind and body to their absolute limits, sustaining numerous injuries. Most concerning was the damage to his Gate—the organ necessary for using magic—which had suffered severe strain and was now being closely monitored.
“Neither myself nor Ram, nor Emilia, nor the Great Spirit, nor even Beatrice, has a high aptitude for healing magic, you seeee. The only one in this household with any real healing ability is you, but only for external wounds. Internal wounds are outside your area of expertise.”
“And you tend to use your magic with wild and reckless abandon, which isn’t always a good thing,” Puck added dryly.
It frustrated Rem that she couldn’t deny that. But there was a reason behind Roswaal’s explanation. If there wasn’t a healer within the household, that meant—
“You want me to find an internal specialist for Subaru?”
“Most of the village and manor were spared casualties, thanks to his efforts, and that was no small feat. It is the least I can do to compensate him for that, you seeee. So the Great Spirit and I have been doing some scheming…”
Roswaal spread his arms in an exaggerated gesture, but despite his theatrics, his sincerity was clear. That brought Rem some relief. From the way he spoke, it was apparent he had already found a solution. She had served under him for ten years—she could tell when he had things figured out.
The real question was how did Puck fit into the solution?
“His efforts were commendable. And we have the perfect opportunity to repay him. Sooo, I was thinking of calling upon the best healer in the royal capital. And I was consulting the Great Spirit here for the best gift to compensate them.”
“Not like he really needs my permission anyway. Sentimentality aside, you have jurisdiction over that land, don’t you, Roswaal? Of course, I won’t object—and neither will Lia, as long as her kin are safe.”
“Be that as it maaay, I wouldn’t want to displease you and blow things out of proportion again.”
“C’mon, that was one time. Geesh, why do you always hold grudges…”
The two laughed, but Rem knew the underlying context of their conversation was far from lighthearted. When Roswaal had gone into the forest to retrieve Emilia for the royal selection, Puck had opposed it. The resulting clash—according to rumor—had altered the very topography of the region.
However, Rem pushed aside those past conflicts and focused on the task at hand. It had to be important if Roswaal had summoned her to discuss it at this hour.
“I can see from your expression that you’re raring to go, but let me clarify the assignment. Rem, I have an important role for you…Subaru’s surveillance. More specifically, you are to keep a close watch over him to ensure he doesn’t do anything reckless.”
“And am I correct in assuming that you’re giving me full authority to handle this task as I see fit, Master Roswaal?”
“Oh myyy, you are twisting my words quite a bit to fit an agenda, aren’t you? I’m not mad at that, though.”
“Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, I have done everything within my power not to step on Subaru’s shadow or breathe the air he exhales—and now you command me to keep a close eye on him?”
“Wow, sounds like you were holding back quite a bit. I had no idea,” Puck said, blinking in surprise.
Rem’s self-imposed restrictions shocked him. But in truth, that was only the surface of it. Fearing her own lack of self-control, the limitations she had placed upon herself extended far beyond what she had just revealed.
“However, now is not the time to share everything…,” Rem murmured.
“Hmmm?” Puck tilted his head inquisitively.
“Anyway! I have received your command,” Rem said, ignoring Puck and standing straight before Roswaal. “I shall obey and stay near Subaru. You commanded it. If I must, I must.”
With that, she gracefully moved toward the terrace door, parting the flowing curtains as she stepped through.
“I shall take my leave. Master Roswaal, Great Spirit, may sweet dreams visit you this evening—”
After some abnormally poetic parting words, Rem practically pirouetted out of the terrace.
Puck and Roswaal eyed each other after her grand exit. Then the tip of Puck’s tail pointed at Roswaal’s glass as he said, “I think she was downwind of your drink.”
“…Juuust to be clear, that most certainly wasn’t intentional.”
With a shrug, the clown and the cat resumed their drinking.
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