CHAPTER 7
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1
In the wake of the flock of birds leaving, an abyss descended over the balcony.
The unnatural-seeming birds did not hesitate to spread their wings and leap into the dark sky.
As if to say that falling into a sky that held no support was more comfortable than remaining there.
If that is what they felt, then Subaru 100 percent agreed. That was just how unexpected and awful the stifling situation was.
“What are you talking about?”
The air was electric with tension as Julius repeated himself without stumbling over his words.
The words were the same as his first dumbfounded question, but he had regained a bit of vigor. It was a sad demonstration of the strength of Julius’s core.
—How much did he hear?
Subaru forced his brain back into motion only to quickly run into a problem. It was crucial to know how much Julius had heard.
The part about Echidna being Anastasia wasn’t something to tell him without warning. And the secrets shared by Subaru and Echidna were too deeply rooted when it came to the effort to conquer the watchtower.
It involved artificial spirits, the Witch of Greed, and Gluttony’s authority, among other things. Subaru had judged that telling Julius the details about the situation brought on by the mixture of all those things would just cause confusion and pain.
Most of all the fact that Anastasia’s conscience was slumbering, and the artificial spirit Echidna was inhabiting her body.
That’s…
“Argh, Natsuki, stop it with that obvious look.”
“…Huh?”
While Subaru froze, Echidna smiled elegantly while poking his chest gently.
Her tone and attitude were a perfect imitation of Anastasia, and for a moment, Subaru looked shocked, wondering what was happening.
Leaving him in the lurch, Echidna spun around.
“Sorry, Julius, but we weren’t tryin’ to leave you out. I was just talkin’ with Natsuki a liiittle bit about some business for after we finish this trip.”
“ ”
“We left the green room because Rem and the land dragon are there. I wasn’t really worried about them hearing, but it just feels strange talkin’ about secret things when other people are around, right? So we changed scenes…and just happened to stumble onto this place. That’s all.”
Putting her hands together in front of her chest, she cocked her head slightly.
“Beg your forgiveness.”
It was a cute gesture and felt like exactly the sort of thing Anastasia might do. But the actual contents of the story were far too unconvincing to have come from Anastasia’s lips.
Almost like a thin tissue of an excuse patched together to be superficially presentable when they had been caught in a compromising situation. Or perhaps not even almost like that at all.
Echidna should have been caught off guard by an unfavorable situation, too. She was just a little bit faster than Subaru at springing into action.
And…
“You…are not Lady Anastasia, are you?”
“ ”
“I…would like you to explain the situation. You cannot cover it up or hide it further. Even I cannot simply accept that any longer.”
Julius interrogated Echidna head-on after a brief moment of hesitation. Echidna started to argue, but—
“That’s not—”
“I was quite clear that I could not simply accept that.”
Julius drew the sword that he had replaced for his broken one and pointed its tip at Echidna’s white neck.
“Julius, wait! That’s…”
“You too, Subaru. I only wish to know the truth.”
Entirely calmly, Julius asked them to come clean.
Echidna caught her breath and could not move with the sword pointed at her. Her eyes looked at Subaru for some help, but he couldn’t think of any way of recovering, either.
“How much did you hear, Julius?”
“…From the part regarding Lady Anastasia’s body.”
Julius’s voice was hoarse as he answered the question.
Whatever he had heard was more than enough to make him emotional and lose any semblance of calm. But even so, at least on the surface, he was still keeping his cool.
Or else things had gone so far off the map that he had blown past getting emotional.
“…I’m an artificial spirit that has spent many years together with Ana. My name is Echidna.”
“ ”
“During the fighting with the cultists in Pristella and since then, Ana’s consciousness has been slumbering inside her body. Because of that, I am the one moving her body instead of her. I have been pretending to be her since that day.”
Echidna had also decided that there was no way to cover things up once it got to that.
She coolly, without any preface, began to explain things in a matter-of-fact tone.
How she had switched with Anastasia during the fighting in Pristella and faced off against the Archbishop—and how Anastasia did not reawaken after the fighting was over.
How she had hid that from Julius, Ricardo, and the rest of the Iron Fangs, and had set out for the Pleiades Watchtower in search of a way to restore Anastasia.
—And that Subaru alone knew her secrets.
“…Why share them with just Subaru?”
“He was unaffected by the Archbishop’s authority and was the most removed from the confusion of the moment. And he is a spirit mage contracted with Beatrice, an artificial spirit of a similar origin to mine. Though I did not particularly consider sharing everything at first, either. It was just…”
“… Just?”
“…He saw through the fact that I was pretending to be Ana. So I told him.”
There was a powerful shock in Julius’s eyes as he heard how Subaru came to be the only one who knew that Echidna was inhabiting Anastasia’s body.
The reason Echidna had hesitated for a moment had to be because she had expected that reaction.
It was only natural. Subaru noticing Echidna’s pretense meant…
“So something that could be noticed by an outsider of minimal connection should have been noticed by the man who regarded himself as her first knight, huh…?”
“Wait a second, dumbass! That isn’t a fair thing to say at all!”
“ ”
“The situation…the situation was just bad! It was already a huge enough incident, and you were already at wit’s end yourself! And not just you! Ricardo and Mimi and the rest of them were, too. Me noticing was just… It was just by chance!”
Latching onto Julius’s self-deprecating comment, Subaru tried to stop him from blaming himself. But he could not find anything to say to ease Julius’s feelings at not having performed his duty as her first knight.
What could he have really done? Can he be blamed for it?
With all his achievements, efforts, everything he had built up in his life as a knight crumbling like a castle of sand, fading from the minds of the master he had sworn fealty to, the comrades who he had sworn to raise her to the throne together with, the friends he had spent so much time fighting alongside as a knight, and so many others, how could anyone order him to stand back up?
How could anyone expect him to be resolute? To be refined? To behave like a proper first knight? Who could do that?
If being a knight meant not being allowed to be hurt like every other human was allowed to be hurt, then being a knight was a curse on Julius Juukulius.
“It is the job of a first knight to always elevate such chance accidents into something more definite.”
“Gh! What is a first knight supposed to be… If that’s it, then a pain-in-the-ass title like that is better off—”
“Don’t tell me to discard it, please. I… Right now, the thought of even a single thing slipping away from me is absolutely terrifying.”
Subaru’s random attempt at consolation was easily swatted aside by the ideals of chivalry that Julius lived by. The feelings Subaru wanted to vent stopped in the back of his throat, and he could not say anything as Julius shook his head.
“Returning to the subject at hand… Echidna, what is your goal?”
“…To return this body to Ana. The primary reason I guided us to the Pleiades Watchtower was that rather than the victims of Gluttony and Lust.”
“So you do not desire the present state of affairs. Which means you have not found a means of restoring Lady Anastasia… What if I were to kill you?”
Julius’s eyes narrowed as he asked a dangerous question made all the more threatening by his sword still being pointed at Echidna.
She averted her eyes and touched her breast.
“I do not have any way to prove that I am not just an evil spirit that is making up excuses in order to take over Ana’s body. So if you decide that I am lying and try to exterminate me, I can’t stop you.”
Pausing for a moment there, Echidna continued—
“But the most likely case would be that Ana’s consciousness would not return, leaving just a husk of her former self… In the worst case, it might disrupt her bodily functions, and she could even die.”
She answered Julius’s hypothesis with her opinion and then raised her hands.
“Of course, that could just be me saying whatever I can in order to avoid dying. I cannot say for sure that my death would not resolve things. If that would grant Ana a long life, then I would not mind it. I don’t want to die, though.”
“Why would you go so far for Lady Anastasia?”
“Ana and I are incomplete. The relationship between a standard spirit and spirit mage might not be the right parallel to use as a comparison, but…”
Echidna looked between Julius and Subaru.
As if jealous of the two of them who were able to have proper relations with spirits.
“I love Ana. I’ve been by her side since she was just a small child. So I don’t ever want to abandon her. I want her to be happy. That’s my reason.”
“ ”
“Julius, the reason I didn’t tell you the truth is because I didn’t want to cause any unnecessary confusion. Ana wanted to keep my existence secret if at all possible, and she successfully did until the events in Pristella. All thanks to her stubbornness.”
But that secret, years in the making, came out because of the clash with the Witch Cult. Not only that, the price of her secret had put her life in danger…
“…I…understand your relationship with Lady Anastasia.” The sword at Echidna’s throat slowly withdrew. It slid audibly into its sheath as Julius looked down, his long eyelashes framing his fallen eyes. “It is difficult to believe all of it, but believe it I must. At the very least, it would be rash to act hastily against you at the moment.”
“I…see. I’m glad you are taking it rationally, Julius. I’m sure Ana would be happy, too.”
“ ”
Letting go of the hilt of his sword, Julius was silent, not answering Echidna’s words.
But it was something far removed from acceptance. He still had deep feelings of embarrassment over what had happened. But he brushed that regret aside with a blink of his eyes.
“I would like to confirm: If you are manifesting by using Lady Anastasia’s Odo…then the more you exert yourself, the more burden is placed on her body. Correct?”
“It is. Your understanding is correct. Eating balanced meals, getting a good night’s sleep, some light exercise…just general good health practices, but those are best for minimizing the amount of Odo used.”
“I see. In which case…why did you do something so rash on the second floor?”
“ ”
“The burden that outburst placed on Lady Anastasia’s body could not have been light. From everything discussed so far, that one action sticks out as going against what you’ve claimed so far. So why did you do it?”
“That’s…”
Julius’s observation was correct, and it was a thing that had bothered Subaru, too.
Her unyielding, desperate expression as she intervened when Julius was being pummeled. It did not look like something that was feigned or calculated.
It was pure and simple concern. It was something that was possible for Echidna to feel for Julius, having always been at Anastasia’s side… But was that just it?
But in response to Julius’s question and Subaru’s thoughts, Echidna bowed at the waist.
“I’m sorry. I blundered. Um, it’s embarrassing saying this as an amateur, but it was a strategic decision.”
“A strategic decision?”
“At that point, I did not know anything about whether the examiner intended to kill or not. In the worst case, we might have completely lost the combat potential you represented. And Reid Astrea had his back to me… It looked like a chance. Though, not only did it not turn out well, it actually caused more problems. So…sorry.”
With that, Echidna raised her body.
There was no contradiction in her explanation. If she called it an amateur’s judgment leading to a careless action, Subaru couldn’t exactly disprove it. Aside from the fact that it rang hollow on an emotional level.
But just as Subaru was about to push her on that, right before he could say something—
“Understood. I would ask you to refrain from rash acts going forward. For Lady Anastasia’s sake.”
“I understand.”
“Wha—?!”
Julius seemed to be accepting that explanation, and Echidna nodded in response. Subaru’s eyes widened at their exchange, and he stomped the ground.
“How can you just accept—?”
“I accepted it. And Echidna has agreed to refrain from rash acts going forward. What more is to be said? Apologies for your being caught up in this due to the circumstances. However, this is a problem between the two of us as members of Lady Anastasia’s faction. It is not something for you to trouble yourself over.”
Subaru grit his teeth as Julius tried to keep him out of the problem.
Telling me not to trouble myself over it…
“It’s my choice how I take things!”
“So you may take things as you wish, but you won’t allow me to address my own problems? …Like how you chose not to tell me about Lady Anastasia and Echidna?”
“Ngh.”
“Apologies, I’ve said too much… But it is the truth.”
With that cold, quiet counter, Julius looked away.
Seeing Julius’s unyielding stance and hearing his voice, Subaru finally realized it.
Julius was not calm at all.
Not only was he seething internally, he could not even completely feign calmness for appearances.
His existence was lost to the world, and the one thing that remained—his fealty—had been effectively denied, and the promise that had been made to him out of consideration had also been broken.
That he still didn’t allow himself to become emotional despite all that was a testament to Julius’s way of life.
“I have no intention of arguing. For Lady Anastasia’s sake, it is necessary to find a means of resolving this situation as soon as possible. Echidna, I would like to get your full and complete support in that as well.”
“…Yes. Given I couldn’t hide it from you, there’s not much reason for me to keep pretending to be Ana. Of course, only if I have your permission to speak in my own voice using Ana’s body.”
“It matters not. It will just be an even greater spur for me to work to return Lady Anastasia.”
It was a terribly self-harming resolve, and Echidna looked saddened by it. But Julius was looking up at the sky and couldn’t see it.
For the first time, he seemed to realize that the miasma did not block the night sky from the balcony, and his eyes narrowed as he looked at the twinkling stars.
“There is no reason to stay here any longer. We should return inside. Tomorrow, we must tell Lady Emilia and the others about Lady Anastasia’s body and the truth about Echidna.”
“Okay, I understand. I’ll prepare myself for that.”
With that, Julius gently took Echidna’s hand as she started moving. It was surely the exact same action he would have taken for Anastasia.
Whatever the contents of the body, his fidelity to Anastasia was unchanged. Even if she was slumbering deep inside her own body, and even if she had forgotten him completely.
“Julius!”
Feeling a sharp pain as he watched him go, Subaru called out.
Being forgotten from others’ memories, but them still remaining in your own head. Clinging to those feelings and desperately struggling… I understand that path painfully well.
“Even if I’m forgotten, I will never forget.” That feeling alone can be enough to spur you on.
“ ”
Julius stopped but did not turn around, still holding Echidna’s hand.
Despite the fact that his heart must have been on the verge of breaking, he remained agonizingly straight and tall, and that really annoyed Subaru for some reason.
“Do you really not have anything to say to me?”
He had kept quiet about Echidna, about Anastasia’s body.
Just hours earlier, he had promised to switch out time in the green room with Julius, only to break that promise and have a secret conversation with Echidna on the balcony.
He could explain it. He had his reasons. It had not been done maliciously.
But malicious or not, reasons or not, excuses or not, that would not set a heart free.
So just scream and shout and curse. Vent your anger at me.
Subaru did not know if that was really for Julius’s sake or just for the sake of his own guilty conscience. And Julius would surely never do that.
He wouldn’t scream and vent his grievances…
“—I do.”
“ ”
“I understand. I understand what you were thinking, why you hid the truth from me. I know it would never be done maliciously. It was only out of concern and consideration for me. And I agree with your judgment. Were I in your position, I would probably not have told you, either.”
“ ”
“…But even so…”
He looked up to the sky, and he struggled to speak.
“…I did not want you or Lady Anastasia to think me unfit as a knight.”
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