Re:Zero Kara Hajimeru Isekai Seikatsu (LN) - Volume 17 - Chapter 4.3

3

“I am so sorry. I didn’t think we would have guests, so I didn’t have a chance to tidy up very much.”

“Aww, don’t worry about that! It’s all right! Compared with Mimi’s room, it’s waaaay cleaner!”

“My my, you are a girl, so that simply will not do. You must keep your own room clean.”

The woman gently stroked Mimi’s head as the latter sat on a sofa, waving her feet around. Mimi purred happily and seemed to immediately relax.

Garfiel kept his mouth shut tight as he gazed at the pair.

The woman had long, luscious blond hair, fair skin, and a delicate physique. Her face was gentle, and there was softness in her jade eyes—which, up close, greatly resembled those of Garfiel’s older sister. From her youthful appearance, she looked like she was in her twenties, but her actual age had to be in the latter half of her thirties.

After all, fifteen years had already passed since then. In spite of that, her appearance had changed little since he last saw her—a fact that tore at Garfiel’s heart with frightful intensity.

“Mr., um, Gorgeous Tiger? Are you not fond of tea? I’m sorry. I went and prepared some without asking what you prefer…”

As Garfiel held his silence, the woman—a woman claiming the name of Liara Thompson—lowered her eyes with a troubled expression. Garfiel replied with “Nah, that’s not it” as he hastily raised his cup. “It ain’t anythin’ like that. I was just a little…surprised at how big this place is.”

“My, so that was it? True, our home is quite large. It is very much a chore to clean it every day and takes a fair bit of time… But it’s strange, really.”

“…What is?”

“I always ask guests what leaves they prefer, but this time, I just went ahead and picked this.”

How odd, Liara’s smile seemed to say as she pressed a hand to her cheek. Garfiel brought the cup to his lips without a word. The taste and the temperature were exactly to his liking.

Deeply disturbed by this, Garfiel searched for any disparities between Liara before him and the woman from his memories.

Liara’s attire and behavior suited someone living in a stately mansion. The woman in Garfiel’s memories was a simple person who wore simple clothes and gave off the impression of naivete, knowing little of the world around her. This was one area in which they differed immensely.

And yet everything about her presence—that smiling face, that gentle voice, the tiniest of gestures—led Garfiel astray.

“ ”

She had to be someone else. He was sure this was a different person. Liara treated Garfiel like she would with any acquaintance of her children. Furthermore, his mother wasn’t such a skilled actress that she could pull this off.

In his own mind, Garfiel desperately came to the conclusion that Liara Thompson was someone other than his mother—Lisha Tinzel. This woman only looked identical.

Garfiel was still nursing when he last saw his mother. The reason his memories of his mother were so vivid despite that was, regardless of how he felt about it, because the Sanctuary’s Trial had shown him the past in normally unknowable detail.

Thanks to that, Garfiel remembered his mother’s face, voice—and love.

And that was how Garfiel learned of his mother’s unfortunate death, which occurred right after she had separated from her own children.

Therefore, a reunion with his mother was a wish that Garfiel would never see granted. This was just a different person who greatly resembled her.

But if she was a different person, then why was her scent so familiar?

“Mimi, the fur around your ears looks very fluffy. I wonder… May I touch it?”

“Of course!”

When Mimi offered her head, Liara happily patted it, savoring the comforting sensation of her fur.

Her innocent, doe-like smile, the way she didn’t know how to doubt others, and the unguarded way she’d invite a suspicious-looking man and a kitty-girl into her own home were really quite something.

Everything about her behavior made Garfiel suspect that this Liara really might be his mother.

—Lisha, the mother of Garfiel and Frederica, was an unlucky woman.

When her family was suffering under a crushing debt, she’d been sold to an illegal slave trader at a young age. After this slave trader was raided by demi-human bandits, she became the slave of beast people instead.

Several years later, the bandits readily abandoned Lisha when she became pregnant with Frederica. Afterward, following one twist after another, she gave birth to Frederica while she was the captive of a different group of bandits.

Garfiel had heard from his older sister, Frederica, that her first memories were of her time with the bandits. His sister had not spoken of what happened during that time, but judging from how they up and disappeared the instant Lisha became pregnant with Garfiel, it could not have been a wholesome environment at all.

Spending her time with one misfortune rolling in after another, Lisha, with a young daughter in tow and a swelling belly, finally entered the care of Roswaal in the peaceful land of the Sanctuary.

Your mother… Lisha, was it? I had few opportunities to exchange words with her, you seeee. She was quite a mysterious woman. Or rather, should I describe her as incoooomprehensible, perhaps? She is a woman who seemed to keep happiness very close to her. I believe she motivated herself by living for tomorrow since she was very young… Ahh, yes. I must have been jealous. This is probably why I—

Those were the uncharacteristic words that Roswaal used to describe Garfiel’s mother.

It was the first night that Otto had convinced Garfiel to try alcohol. That same night, Garfiel had gone to visit Roswaal in a drunken stupor. As Garfiel snapped at him with even more venom than usual, Roswaal abruptly spoke about his impressions of the young boy’s mother.

Garfiel thought he’d die from his hangover the next morning, but he hadn’t lost the memories of the night before. Therefore, his recollection of Roswaal speaking about his mother was still fresh. Garfiel was more than a little grateful to the alcohol for leaving him with that much.

At any rate, looking at the big picture, his mother was apparently an airhead whose brain had probably been permanently set to feel happiness. Had that not been the case, why would she have ever left a place of such peace in search of Garfiel’s father, of whom Garfiel had nothing but painful memories?

In the end, she’d ended up dying almost immediately after setting off. What in the world had she been thinking?

—Even after all that time later, he’d still never found the answer to where his mother’s happiness had come from.

“Mom, I’m getting hungry.”

It was then that the siblings returned hand in hand from their room after getting a new change of clothes.

The older sister looked over the heads of their guests to call out to her mother and promptly hurried over to her side, sternly glaring at Garfiel with her jade eyes all the while.

“Hey, Mom. It’s suppertime already, so shouldn’t our guests head on home?”

“Oh, how can you say that? Mr. Gorgeous and Ms. Mimi helped Fred out, after all. He was apparently in danger of drowning while playing on a boat.”

“Hmph, are you sure about that? Wasn’t it really this Gorgeous guy who probably rocked the boat in the first place? I bet he was probably planning on coming here to try and milk us for lots of money.”

“That’s enough, young lady… But now that you mention it, he did save Fred. We should show him our thanks, so maybe offering some money would be the most proper.”

“Mom!!”

Apparently, the girl felt like she had to do everything she could to protect her family. Unfortunately, her fervent efforts weren’t quite clicking with her mother; Garfiel couldn’t help but feel that she was flailing in the air.

But the heartwarming exchange between parent and child bitterly pained Garfiel, like he was walking barefoot over a path of thorns. It was so agonizing that he could barely stand staying there any longer.

“…Seems like we ain’t all that welcome, so maybe we should head on out.”

“Ehhh, whyyy? Let’s hang out just a little bit more!”

“No way. This is like sculpting the Kokran, damn it.”

Mimi protested when Garfiel attempted to leave, but Garfiel wouldn’t brook any objections as he tried to forcibly drag the girl out with him. Liara made a sad face at Garfiel’s assertion, whereas her daughter took the opportunity to stick her tongue out at him as she watched him go. As for the little brother—

“Don’t go, Gorgeous Tiger!”

Grabbing onto Garfiel’s sleeve, he tried to bar Garfiel’s path.

Instantly, Garfiel hesitated to shake off those tiny fingers. He wasn’t sure why he paused, but…

“Sorry, kid. I got people waitin’ for me. They’ll be worried if I’m late. That’s why I’m goin’, okay?”

Still unable to figure out why he froze for a moment, Garfiel put a hand on the boy’s head as he explained.

He’d been welcomed in, yet here he was, making his escape. If this was how it was going to be, he should never have accepted the invitation to begin with.

Regret, regret, regret—the only thing left throbbing deep in his chest was regret.

“Fred, I know you’re sad, but you have to let go of Mr. Gorgeous’s clothing.”

Heeding Garfiel’s words, Liara gently removed her son’s fingers. Garfiel was relieved to have his sleeve free again.

“We must not cause our guests distress by forcing them to stay. As the saying goes, For guests, hospitality, and a Sowarie.”

And then Liara’s next words cut deep into Garfiel’s defenseless soul.

He had let his guard down after that initial wave of relief, only for that single phrase to shear through them, dredging up his memories.

His sense of defeat toward Reinhard, his sense of powerlessness at having betrayed his own dream, his shock the instant he first set eyes upon Liara—compared with that phrase, those were almost inconsequential.

It was enough that he almost thought that his body was being torn asunder—

“Garf, let’s go.”

It was then that Mimi, who had been so reluctant to leave, gently pulled on Garfiel’s arm. When she proceeded toward the door, Garfiel silently followed along.

Right as the two of them were headed to the entrance—

“I’m home… Oh, we have guests?”

—the door ahead of them opened, and a gentlemanly man sporting a full beard raised his eyebrows at the unexpected sight.

He wore finely tailored clothes and had a lively air about him. His face looked like that of a capable man who was calm inside the home. His position was clear even before the children reacted to his return.

“Errr, I don’t believe we’ve met. Who might you be?”

“Dad, this is Gorgeous Tiger!”

“A shady person!”

“Ehhh?”

The starkly contrasting descriptions delivered by his son and daughter left the man—their father—rather confused. In search of rescue, he shifted his gaze to Liara, who was standing beside the children.

The man’s warm gaze caused Liara to loosen her cheeks slightly. That was unmistakably love on her face.

Garfiel had hit his limit.

“We’re nobody. Nothin’ to worry about. Time for us to be headin’ out.”

Garfiel swiftly said his good-byes, continuing to hold Mimi’s hand as he left the room with her in tow. Pushing past the man, who hastily gave way, Garfiel raced out, fleeing the house.

“Gorgeous Tiger!”

From behind, the boy called out to Garfiel in a sad voice. However, Garfiel had nothing left in him to muster a reply— No, he just wasn’t worthy.

—When he glanced over, he saw a black phantom encroaching on the edges of his vision. Smiling at him mockingly was a woman who was surely dead.

Gorgeous? Tiger? Where was the golden tiger in him now?

A tiger was strong. A tiger was mighty. Nothing ever shook a tiger.

What part of him was a tiger just then?

Would a real tiger be broken up over something like this?!!

“Garf! Stop already!”

“!”

Just as his thoughts were clouded in a crimson haze, one voice brought him back to his senses.

When he turned, Garfiel realized that he’d been half dragging Mimi along. She had pleaded in pain. Looking closer, he could see that the girl’s slender wrist had gone blue from the grip of his hand.

“S-sorry… I didn’t mean to…”

“Garf, are you all right? You’ve been reaaally weird since earlier. Does your tummy hurt?”

When Garfiel tried to apologize in a shaky voice, Mimi peered at him with concern. This was not a look of resentment over her wrist injury, but one of pure consideration alone.

This pushed Garfiel’s already sinking heart to even lower depths.

An awkward silence fell over the two as a damp nighttime breeze blew over them. The sun had already set, and the city streets under the night sky were dotted by magic lamps. As the light of the magic fixtures reflected that of the setting sun, the waterway took on a tranquil, mysterious beauty, but Garfiel had no room left in his heart to enjoy the sight.

“Pardon me, both of you!”

It was then that the voice of an out-of-breath man drew near the pair that was standing on the street at night.

When they looked over, they saw the man from earlier illuminated under the magic lamps. With his coat stripped off, he had finally reached the pair, his breath ragged as he rested his hands on his knees.

“Haaah! Haaah! I managed to catch up with you. This really will not do… I had plenty of physical energy back in the day, but I’ve wasted away since I started doing nothing but desk work…”

“…What is it? You got business with us or somethin’?”

There was a barb in his voice when Garfiel addressed the man who’d caught up with them.

It wasn’t to the extent of Liara and the siblings, but there was no mistaking that he, too, was poison so far as Garfiel was concerned. Garfiel didn’t intend to converse for long. He wanted to get out of there as fast as he possibly could.

Seeing Garfiel’s attitude, the man seemed to pick up that he was not being welcomed with open arms.

“I heard the story from my wife. You two saved my son, didn’t you? And yet I let you leave without speaking a single word of thanks. The height of impropriety.”

“…Ain’t no big deal. Exaggeratin’ stuff like that just ends up being a pain in the butt for me.”

“Everything about my children is very important to me. Please allow me to thank you. I am Galek Thompson, one of the officials in charge of running this city. If there is anything I can do for you…”

“There really ain’t anythin’…”

When Garfiel tried to rebuff the tenacious man, Galek, his words got stuck in his throat.

Suddenly, he had a thought—he, Liara’s husband, might know who she really was.

“There’s just one thing I wanna ask ya.”

“Yes, by all means. If it is something my position allows me to answer, I shall.”

Galek nodded toward Garfiel with an amicable smile.

It was the same for Liara and for his son, Fred. Galek included, the Thompson family was far too fond of people. That daughter was the only one with a proper level of wariness in the bunch.

—That was how outside threats like Garfiel were able to take advantage of them.

“Your wife… Is Liara her real name?”

“ ”

Instantly, the atmosphere changed.

When Garfiel posed his question, Galek dropped the smile he’d worn to that point. Both his voice and expression were quiet as he rolled Garfiel’s question over his tongue.

“I wonder—what do you mean by that?”

“I mean what I said. Reid always faced his challengers head-on. I don’t like roundabout stuff. Your wife… Is Liara her real name or not?”

When Garfiel cut right to the point, the expression coming over Galek was one of clear consternation. He opened and closed his mouth several times, breathing hard in search of air and words.

“You… Are you saying you know something about my wife?”

“I’m the one who wants to know about her.”

Garfiel replied sincerely to Galek’s wavering question.

Detecting the genuine emotion at the core of that reply, Galek went silent, sinking into thought. As Garfiel waited for the words that would follow, he felt Mimi grasp his hand with her opposite hand from earlier.

When he shifted his gaze in her direction, Mimi simply went, “Heh-heh—” with a bubbly smile.

“…It would seem I should speak truthfully with you.”

Breaking the silence, Galek uttered those words with a sigh.

A deep weariness infused that voice, along with an unconcealable sense of guilt, causing Garfiel to narrow his brows.

Then as Garfiel maintained his silence, Galek began to speak.

“My wife, Liara…has no memories from before I met her fifteen years ago.”

“! No memories, ya say?”

“It was a stormy night. I was just another merchant returning from a business deal when I came across the site of a large landslide. My future wife was caught up in that disaster and had been buried alive.”

The terms that Galek relayed—landslide, buried alive—made Garfiel’s breath come to a halt.

Bubbling up in his mind was the glimpse into the past he’d seen in the Sanctuary. An unsalvageable past, in which his mother had left Garfiel and Frederica behind, setting off from the settlement only to become engulfed in a landslide and lose her life—

—But had his mother really died? He’d never even considered other possibilities.

“ ”

That terrifying concept made Garfiel clench his teeth hard so that they wouldn’t chatter.

He’d thought for certain that his mother had died. Even if his mother had been safe, if she had been tethered to life, he couldn’t possibly imagine a reason why she wouldn’t have returned to Garfiel and Frederica’s side.

“After she was rescued, she hovered on the edge of life and death, opening her eyes several days later just as I came to check on her. Then she spoke these words loud and clear— ‘Who am I?’ she asked.”

Galek lowered his eyes, shaking his head from side to side.

“Perhaps it is a side effect of her heart nearly stopping once. She didn’t remember anything. All she knew, from the name tag on the clothes she wore, was that there was a Li in either her family name or her given name. And so she took the name of a flower that blooms at night. I have called her Liara ever since.”

After that, Galek’s gaze grew distant as he spoke, but there was not a great deal to tell thereafter.

After he took her into his care, the bonds between them naturally deepened, and it was not long before they fell in love. And ever since he’d taken Liara in, Galek’s business had grown by leaps and bounds.

Galek never questioned his belief that this good fortune was from bringing Liara back with him.

Because of her, Galek had worked in this city as a man, a husband, and a father until the present day.

That was why—

“—I love my wife. I dearly love our children. Once upon a time, her past weighed upon my mind, but not anymore. No matter what happened to her before we met, she is my wife, the woman most precious to me.”

Galek spoke those words firmly and plainly with his chest out.

These were the unshakable feelings that Galek felt for his wife, carried through from the moment they’d met to the present.

“ ”

Listening to his tale to the end, Garfiel silently looked up at the murky night sky.

How did the waxing moon and the stars dotting the darkness feel as they gazed down at him in that moment?

As Garfiel chose to stay silent, Galek’s lips trembled more than once. He was hesitating. But then he firmly closed his eyes, brushing that hesitation aside.

“I am truly sorry to ask you this. However, I wish to inquire nonetheless.”

“ ”

“How…are you related to my wife, Liara?”

Just how cruel a question was that to ask someone?

Confronted by the last thing he wanted to be asked, Garfiel slowly shifted his gaze from the sky back to the ground, and then finally to Galek.

Galek looked at Garfiel with quiet, unshakable resolve in his eyes. Even Garfiel wasn’t insensitive enough to miss the significance of those words and the emotions invested in them.

More than that, he knew exactly what response he should give.

“ ”

He opened his mouth once, then closed it. He breathed in and out, in and out, over and over.

His pulse was racing. His eyes felt unsteady. His head throbbed with pain. The urge to vomit kept welling up.

He felt a storm of emotions raging inside as well as the ultimate sense of loss. During it all, Mimi held Garfiel’s hand.

“Me, I…”

“ ”

“I don’t have…any relationship with your wife.”

He did it.

He’d said it aloud.

With those words, the torrent of emotions swirling inside his chest rapidly dissipated. What remained was a yawning, cavernous loss, an emptiness that made his limbs run cold.

“I am…very sorry…”

Lowering his eyes, his shoulders trembling, Galek bowed his head to Garfiel.

But Galek’s apology was not something Garfiel wanted.

Enough. Just stop it. Don’t hurt me anymore. What went wrong? Who’s to blame? Who do I have to smash, to rip to shreds, to send flying, to get over this?

What am I supposed to do with the pain in my heart that just won’t go away?

“—Darling! Ahh, I’m so glad you’re with Mr. Gorgeous and Ms. Mimi.”

“?!”

He wanted to scream.

He was on the verge of wailing like a weak little boy.

In that moment, seeing her was more terrible than any poisoned blade for Garfiel.

“Liara, why…?”

“Because I thought you ran out in such a hurry that you would probably manage to catch them. I thought it was terrible for them to leave empty-handed, too…”

Galek was just as surprised by the sudden appearance of his wife as Liara came over in a little run, passing by her husband’s side. Then with Garfiel still rigid from shock, she gently extended a bag toward him.

“These are some Sowarie sweets I made. Perhaps it is not so great a reward, but I have confidence in their taste. Please take this.”

“Ah…”

With a perfectly innocent smile, she offered Garfiel the cruelest of gifts.

Galek agonizingly lowered his face at the exchange between Garfiel and his wife. It was too painful for anyone to intervene. No one who understood the true nature of this meeting could do more.

That was exactly why—

“Ohh! Yaaay! I love sweets! I’m gonna brag to the lady!”

Grabbing the bag from Liara’s hand, Mimi bore an outgoing, smiling demeanor that was completely out of touch.

It was so at odds with the atmosphere from a few moments ago that it took a short while for Galek to accept what was happening. But only Liara, unaware of the circumstances, greeted Mimi’s honest delight with a beaming smile.

“I am so glad to hear you say that. Please give my best regards to this lady of yours.”

“Yep, yep, uuuunderstood! Super understooood!”

Taking the sweets in her still-pallid hand, Mimi smiled as she gave a playful salute. Stuffing the bag in the satchel she carried over one shoulder, she used her long tail to thwap Garfiel on the back.

“Time to go for real! Gorgeous Tiger and Gorgeous Mimi will be leaving now!”

“Yes, do be careful. Mr. Gorgeous, take care not to fall into the waterway at night.”

When Mimi set off with a big wave of her hand, Liara gave a little wave back. With the pair trading hand-waves, the two men watched the exchange with morose faces.

“ ”

From there, Garfiel followed the pull of Mimi’s hand and trailed behind her. Neither Mimi nor Garfiel said anything for a while, continuing to walk as Liara and Galek receded from sight.

Finally, when Garfiel judged that they were far enough, he came to a stop.

“Hey, runt… Er, whoa?!”

“Hiyahhh!”

The next instant, Mimi jumped, stretching Garfiel’s arm. Kicking off from the ground in a flash, the pair leaped onto the roof of a nearby building.

After going up three stories in one bound, Mimi stretched her back.

“Mmm!! Amazing! It feels so good!”

“Hey, don’t gimme that! What gives all of a sudden…?”

Mimi was enjoying the bracing wind as he drew close. But when she stared back at him with her round eyes, Garfiel was at a loss for words. He was oddly uncomfortable seeing how he looked reflected in her eyes.

With Garfiel pressed into silence, Mimi abruptly tilted her head.

“Garf, you look like you’re gonna cry.”

“…Huh? What the hell are ya sayin’? No way I’m gonna do that.”

“I know you’re strong, Garf, but that doesn’t mean you have to act tough. Liara is Garf’s mom, right?”

“!”

When Mimi stepped into the crux of the matter, Garfiel drew in his breath, utterly unprepared.

“Why do you…think that she’s…?”

“I mean, Garf’s and Liara’s scents are reaaally alike. And the scents of Liara’s kids are a little like Garf’s scent, too. So I figured just maaaybe—”

She didn’t learn of Garfiel’s family from the course of the conversation. Mimi had accurately arrived at the truth based on a feral sense of smell and base instinct.

Words could be fabricated or suppressed. But Garfiel had no rebuttal for something based on a part of you that never changed.

“What the hell…?”

Garfiel sluggishly sank down then and there, leaning his listless head backward. Overhead, the stars and moon in the sky stared back down at him, their glimmering unchanged from before.

“So am I right? Is Liara Garf’s mom?”

“…I dunno. Is that person…really my mom?”

He didn’t know. Truly, that was how Garfiel felt from the bottom of his heart.

But just as Galek had told him and as demonstrated by Liara’s own behavior, she had completely forgotten her own past as Lisha.

Having forgotten everything, she’d given birth to children as Liara, living together with them as a happy family.

“Ha. Now that I think of it, doesn’t that make those two my little brother and sister?”

He hadn’t totally wrapped his head around it yet, but if they were siblings by a different father, then his relationship to them was exactly the same as what he had with Frederica. In other words, that boy and girl were his adorable younger siblings. Always the youngest child, Garfiel finally had the younger siblings he’d always wished for.

—Setting aside that no one wanted such a relationship.

“Me tellin’ her who I am ain’t gonna help at all…”

Liara had parted with her past life as Lisha.

Even if Garfiel revealed everything he knew, it would not change the fact that she had spent fifteen years as Liara or that Lisha had lost those fifteen years. It would only hoist the burden of fifteen years’ worth of guilt onto Liara and elicit a sense of loss over the time that Lisha would never get back.

Galek would have to watch his wife struggle, and her children would no doubt be unable to understand their mother’s suffering when they knew nothing of the circumstances.

—All that just for Garfiel’s self-satisfaction.

Even if Liara was recognized as Lisha then and there, the only one who would derive any closure from that was Garfiel.

There was no way that Frederica or Ryuzu could have known Lisha had survived like this. If Garfiel did not tell them, then they surely would never know.

Unless Garfiel spoke of it, there was no way for Liara’s family to find out about the past, either. Their time as a happy family would remain protected and unchanged, peaceful as ever.

If Garfiel could keep it all bottled up in his chest and just abandon his true desires, that would settle everything once and for all.

And yet—

“Why am I…?”

The resolve to cast them aside, the decision to forget, the courage to lock them away—why is this so hard?

Tiger, where have you gone? Show me the right path, the right way to be.

Show me the strength to bear anything, to carry anything, and to stand up even so.

—Oh, tiger, please tell me… Because a real tiger wouldn’t lose to anyone.

“ ”

Squatting down, biting back what was welling up inside, he felt an intense yearning clawing at his heart. Just when Garfiel wanted to cast everything aside, it was then that he noticed.

“Gooood boy.”

Someone was hugging his head against their tiny chest and stroking his hair.

“ ”

As Garfiel sat there, Mimi embraced him from behind.

Placing her chin against his crown, she gently stroked Garfiel’s head with her little palm. It almost felt like the soft sensation was lessening the pain of the raging thoughts crawling around inside his skull.

“The hell…do you think you’re doin’…?”

“Mm, I figured Garf wanted to cry, see… But you know, Mimi heard that men don’t cry unless you make a place for them to do it, and that sounds like such a pain! That’s definitely what the lady told me!”

It was something that resembled an answer, but it wasn’t quite all there.

Trying to keep his heart and his voice from trembling, Garfiel had chosen those sparse, halting words with great care.

Still embracing Garfiel, Mimi smiled teasingly at him.

“So I bet you were thinking, I’m not sure where I am anymore, but it’s probably in a woman’s arms? That’s what you figured, right? Yeah! A man can cry in the arms of the woman he loves!”

“…Who’d fall in love with a little kid like you?”

The first person who came to Garfiel’s mind didn’t behave like Mimi at all, acting cold and dismissive whenever he wanted kindness. And then she suddenly treated him nicely when he least expected it, only to punch him twice as hard later. What a dangerous woman.

The girl before his eyes didn’t have those things in common with her whatsoever—and yet Mimi continued smiling.

“Mm, but it’s all right! Even if Garf hasn’t fallen for Mimi, Mimi’s already fallen for him! And now you’re in Mimi’s arms! The arms of the girl who loves Garf! So it’s all right to cry!”

“—Ah.”

Her opinion was just too stupid.

What is this, some kind of wordplay? A kid making things up as she goes along? This is a convenient excuse—nothing more.

It’s nothing, so stop messing with me.

—Tiger, tiger, where have you gone?

Come back inside this chest right now. Let out a ferocious roar, smack this shrinking back of mine, drag me back to my feet, and do something about these unbearable feelings.

If you don’t…I won’t make it this time.

“Mom…”

Stop, stop, please stop.

I don’t wanna cry, I don’t wanna be weak, I don’t wanna talk in a tearful voice like this.

I’m a tiger. A tiger. I’m the strongest. The mightiest. A stronger, harder shield than anyone else.

That’s—

“Mom! …Mom! ……Mom…!!”

“Good boy.”

“Why?! Why did you forget me?! After all this… Meeting you after all this time!! You won’t even say my name… You won’t…f-forgive me……!!”

“It’s all right. Garf, you’re a very good boy!”

“Moooooommm… Mooommm… Mooommm…!”

—Tiger, tiger, where have you gone?

What do I look like right now? Stars, moon, sky, won’t you tell me?

What do I look like right now?

* * *

If a tiger would never howl in pain, then what do I look like right now?!!