Bonus Short Stories
The War Ogre vs. The Wandering Sage
There was the story about traveling across wastes where myrmecoleo were rampant; the story of the night battle at the fortress in the valley, intercepting a tribe of trolls; Blood’s confrontation with the Hecatoncheir, guardian of the ruins; the time when Gus had a battle of riddles against a cat sith… Even the most casual list of examples showed the incredible richness of the pair’s heroic tales.
As I listened to them talk about their exploits in my usual room in the temple—
“I wonder who’d win in a fight between you two.”
Those words that fell casually from my lips were the trigger.
“Well, obviously, me,” they both said.
By the time I realized I’d set something bad in motion, it was too late.
“Oh? Oh? What’s that, old man, you think you can win against these muscles?”
“Your so-called muscles are long gone. Do you think I’d lose to a skeleton with an empty head?”
“Oh-ho, Nice words for a formless old man who’s even lost his bones. How’s it feel not being able to touch money?”
“Why, you...”
The exchange, started as a joke, gradually began to heat up.
After a little back-and-forth, Blood finally said, “We’re not getting anywhere throwing insults at each other. Why don’t we do this?”
“Mm. A proof is required.”
And so it was settled. There was nothing I could do about it.
The three of us were on the grassy plain at the foot of the temple hill. Blood, the bulky skeleton, had changed into full armor in a very short span of time. He was equipped with magical leather armor, a two-handed broadsword, a dagger, and a sling as well. Gus, the hook-nosed ghost, looked no different from normal, but... yeah, I was certain he had something up his sleeves.
“Right, Will! You start us off!”
“And we’ll need you to referee! It shouldn’t be difficult. We won’t go down that easily, so don’t worry about it too much. Just stop us once Blood starts whining.”
“Alright Will, once this old fogey starts making excuses and running away, be nice to him and take the hint. Twisting the facts is the only thing he’s good at.”
“Oooohh...”
“Oooohh...”
“R-Right! Okay, both of you, play fair and above board! Everything good and clean! This is a match, remember. A match, not a fight!”
I emphasized that part as strongly as I could and stepped between the two, who were glaring at each other with their faces close to touching. My Gus-facing hand slipped through him, though.
“Yeah. A match. Right...”
“Mm. A match. Yes...”
They both looked like they were plotting something, even though Blood didn’t have any facial expressions. But there was no way for me to stop whatever it was they were planning to do; I slightly understood the feeling of wanting to battle it out man against man; and finally, I did want to see them fight just once.
“O-Okay then, here goes.”
I raised my arm into the air.
“Begin!”
I swung my arm down and signaled the start of the match.
◆
Blood was the one who made the first move. As Gus immediately tried to escape into the air, Blood whipped his sling around terrifyingly fast and hurled the projectile at Gus. It was a lead ball about the size of a skipping stone, and it had a Word inscribed on it, so it could hit Gus. Blood was pretty serious about this. And it wasn’t just him; the fact that Gus used the advantage of being a ghost to immediately launch an attack from the air showed that he was pretty serious, too.
Gus tutted and dodged the attack interfering with his movement through the sky.
“Expergisci!”
He suddenly set golems in motion. When had he set those up? Lumps of earth all over began to rise up—
“You sneak!”
They were swept aside with an explosive sound. A single impact from Blood’s broadsword sent one of the human-sized golems flying off into another, smashing them both to pieces.
Drawing in his broadsword with a flowing motion, Blood sprinted towards Gus.
“Acceleratio!”
Gus tried to open up distance between them, but Blood caught up with his own natural acceleration.
“Currere Oleum!”
Blood took an enormous leap to avoid the Grease spell and slashed out at Gus. That instant, Gus cast the Word of Defense with impeccable timing and sent the blade off course.
It was a fierce battle over distance. Blood closed in, Gus dodged and got away; Blood stuck fast to him, and Gus drew back. Gus fired off countless Words and Signs at high speed and attempted to create more space between them, while Blood hindered him with endless special moves and, above all, his overwhelming physical ability.
The battle grew more serious, and both attack and defense rapidly grew faster and more complicated.
And at the moment that I finally became unable to understand the infinite flurry of attacks and feints and started to worry that things were escalating too far—
“What, pray tell, might you two be doing?”
A smiling Mary appeared, everyone froze, and the match was called. I’m sure I don’t need to mention that they received one heck of a talking-to after that.
In other words, the conclusion was this:
In a fight between Blood and Gus, Mary wins.
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