Monster no Goshujin-sama - Volume 9 - Chapter 13

Chapter 13: Everything I Overlooked

The turmoil caused by Shiran’s condition brought up two questions. First, what was she hiding? And second, why was she hiding it? The most probable reason that came to mind was that she was being considerate, but that was hard to believe. She’d just made a terrible mistake yesterday by doing so, yet she repeated that same mistake today. Why would she do this?

Salvia had given me advice and told me what I could do for Shiran. However, that meant I could’ve dealt with it before this happened, so I couldn’t understand why Shiran had never come to me for advice, especially since her behavior had revealed her secret to Leah and Helena.

This situation shouldn’t have happened. Anybody could see what had to be done if they stopped and thought about it calmly. Shiran wasn’t the type of person to make the wrong decision at times like this. She just wasn’t...

That was exactly why I’d overlooked everything that led to this point.

◆ ◆ ◆

When I found her, Shiran was crouching down on the forest floor. To get straight to the point, this whole situation was dangerous. This was the Woodlands, the most hazardous region in this world. Even though we were in the Fringes, the safest of the three zones within the Woodlands, being alone and off guard like she was still posed a risk to her life.

Despite that, Shiran paid no heed to her surroundings. Was this the composure of the powerful Alliance Knights’ former lieutenant, the one known as the strongest knight in the northern Woodlands? No, not at all. It wasn’t in her nature to act like that to begin with. But even considering that, her current state was in no way composed. There was only one thing on her mind right now. She didn’t have the time to worry about anything else.

“...won’t...connect...”

I strained my ears and could hear her muttering. Her words were quiet and disjointed like a broken radio.

“It won’t connect. Why won’t it connect? Just connect.”

She sounded like she could start crying at any moment. Her pale face was steeped in despair.

“It won’t connect!”

Shiran was desperately trying to reattach her severed left arm, but no matter how hard she tried, it was no use. It remained detached, and the moment she let go, it fell back to the floor. She then repeated the exact same action. Her arm plopped to the ground. She picked it up and tried sticking it back on. Then again. And again. And again. Just like a broken machine. How long was she going to keep doing this?

“No...” Shiran finally came to a stop. “It won’t connect.”

She groaned and staggered to her feet.

“I need...more mana,” she said, sounding exhausted and restless. “I need...to find monsters.”

Her uncovered left eye shone with the light of madness characteristic of someone driven to the end of their rope.

“I’m fine. I’m still...fine.”

She kept repeating that to herself, but she was the only one who couldn’t tell that this was the exact opposite of fine.

“Find monsters...eat them...and then...”

She stopped talking. She finally realized I was standing there watching her.

“Taka...hiro?” she mumbled in a daze. “Lily? And Rose too.”

Her eye turned to the two girls behind me, and she slowly recognized the situation she was in. Her expression was so transparent that you could read her thoughts on her face the entire time.

“Aah... You came after me, right?”

Dumbfounded, she smiled. In just a few seconds, all traces of panic vanished from her face.

“Thank you very much, Takahiro. It seems I’ve caused you trouble again.”

Her voice was gentle and her demeanor calm. It was like her behavior just seconds ago had been a hallucination.

“I must apologize for running off like that. I was shaken by the suddenness of the event.”

Shiran lowered her head sincerely. She explained that she’d made a mistake due to the shock of the moment and apologized for causing us trouble. She was gallant and honest—behavior befitting a knight—but I’d seen her depravity just moments ago.

Seriously, my own foolishness made me want to vomit. Why had Shiran hidden this from us? The answer was in her behavior earlier—she’d reached the end of her rope. Despair and fear had festered in her heart. Before this, I couldn’t have even imagined it. Shiran was a noble knight with unshakable conviction, and I’d been under the impression that she was strong enough to handle anything.

Well, that was still true, but I’d convinced myself that her strength was absolute. She wasn’t so unshakable that she’d never known despair or fear. Shiran naturally had a weakness or two, and even though that was so obvious, I’d never realized it. In actuality, this was my failure, and I had to take responsibility for it.

I clenched my fist. Salvia had already told me what Shiran was hiding from us. She’d already told me that I was the only one who could do something and what effect that something would have on Shiran. I knew all of this, so I was resolved for what was to come.

“Takahiro?”

Shiran looked at me quizzically, sensing something amiss, but it was too late.

“Hold her down,” I commanded.

Lily and Rose obeyed without question. They marched in front of me and quickly grabbed Shiran.

“T-Takahiro...?”

Shiran didn’t resist. She was too bewildered by the sudden development and couldn’t react. She really was in a poor state. She was missing an arm and lacking in mana, so she couldn’t have fought off Lily and Rose anyway. Still, it was better that she didn’t resist. We would end all of this while she was still bewildered.

As I walked up to Shiran, I drew the sword at my waist. Holding her down from both sides, Lily and Rose forced Shiran to her knees.

“What are you—?!”

Shiran’s trembling eye reflected the glimmer of my naked blade.

“If you wish to save Shiran, my dear...” An earnest voice played back in my mind. “You must break her. Are you prepared to do that?”

There was no need to ask. I brandished my sword without hesitation. The sharp blade tore through my skin with ease.

“Huh...? T-Takahiro...?”

A scarlet droplet fell on Shiran’s pale skin. It was fresh blood—fresh blood falling from my left hand. I’d removed my bracer beforehand. Rose’s masterwork had a splendid edge, and it split my palm in a perfectly straight line. A sharp pain assaulted my senses, but I was prepared for it and didn’t let it show. I held out my hand to Shiran, no expression on my face.

Another droplet painted Shiran’s cheek red. This would normally be a meaningless act of self-harm, but in this case, that wasn’t what it meant.

“Ah...”

Shiran’s cognition finally caught up with reality, and she sighed quietly. The change in her was dramatic.

“A-Aah...”

An expression of starvation overcame Shiran’s features, half-hidden by her large eyepatch. It was as if the fresh blood falling from my hand were a fountain of water. In fact, that was exactly what it was to her. After all, this was what Shiran had been hiding from us.

◆ ◆ ◆

Due to a mana deficiency, Shiran’s undead body wasn’t functioning properly. She could gain mana by eating monsters, though. She’d told us about it yesterday, and it was, in fact, true. It didn’t contradict any knowledge we already had.

Nevertheless, why would that cause Shiran’s arm to suddenly fall off? Given that she’d acquired mana, there was only one conclusion: she hadn’t gotten enough. It wasn’t all that strange; the mana gained from devouring a monster was slight. It simply meant that it wasn’t enough to replenish her mana-deficient body. If she was to consume the amount of mana she needed, she had to eat from a far more fertile source—me.

This made sense once Salvia told me about it. Asarina was a perfect example. By sprouting from my hand, she’d been born as a unique monster. That was only possible because she was living off the body of a visitor.

Moving at overwhelming speed, mowing down hordes of monsters with a sword of light, transforming into an enormous dragon, and even connecting to monsters through the mental path—each of these powers manifested through mana. This made it clear that visitors were a far greater source of mana than any monster. Kudou Riku had caught wind of this fact before, which was why he’d aimed to power up his monsters by having them eat visitors.

Furthermore, our connection to each other had a positive effect in that regard. The mental path between me and my servants was a connection of mana, and I already knew that mana could flow from my servants into me. As such, the reverse was also true. By drinking my blood, Shiran could absorb mana much more efficiently than she could drinking from any other visitor.

In fact, there was a precedent for this. Back when Shiran first turned into an undead monster at Fort Tilia, I’d tried to restore her sense of reason during her ghoul rampage. As I attempted to get close enough to her to strengthen the mental path’s connection, she’d taken a bite out of my shoulder.

That in itself had strengthened the mental path, but that wasn’t the point. The important thing was that Shiran had been eating me. At the time, she’d licked my blood. She’d lapped at it like a kitten drinking milk, yet with the obscenity of a temptress.

I vividly remembered her entranced expression, giving her the air of a bewitching flower. Now I understood what it meant. Monster meat had been nothing more than a stopgap measure. My flesh and blood were actually the greatest form of nutrition for her, and Shiran couldn’t resist now that it was in front of her.

“A-Aaah...”

It was as though I were presenting her with a gourmet meal when she was on the verge of death by starvation. Of course her sense of reason would go flying out the window.

“Aah...”

Her mouth half-open and her eye agape, Shiran stretched out her neck and was about to lick the bleeding hand I held before her. But right before she did, her white teeth snapped shut.

“I...can’t...”

“Shiran...”

This was unexpected. I never thought she’d be able to regain herself in this situation. Considering how much pain her mind-rending hunger caused her on a regular basis, she couldn’t have accomplished such a feat with half-hearted willpower. Or perhaps she found this act too repulsive. Being a monster had pained her too much.

I recalled the events at the reclamation village we’d passed through right after leaving Fort Tilia.

“Please reconsider, Takahiro.”

That night, Shiran had pointed out the change happening to my body. She’d touched on Gerbera’s mana flowing through me, had warned me that I might end up as something neither human nor monster, and had tried to persuade me to put down my sword for good. When I refused to do so, she’d become uncharacteristically indignant.

What did that mean? Who was it who truly feared turning into something inhuman? Then I finally understood.

“Please stop...Takahiro.”

Her voice was weak. Her eye pleaded with me as she looked up. She looked as if she was moments from dying, which wasn’t that far from the truth. According to what I knew, if left as she was, Shiran would soon no longer be able to maintain her body. Eating monsters had been nothing more than a temporary measure. Even though doing so had kept her body from breaking down completely, it hadn’t helped her recover at all. And now that she was reduced to such a state, it couldn’t help her anymore. If I wished to save her, I had to make her drink my blood, even if it would wound her deeply.

“Sorry, Shiran.”

Thus, I brought my blood-soaked hand closer to her lips.