Monster no Goshujin-sama - Volume 13 - Chapter 2

Chapter 2: The Girl in Thought ~Katou Mana’s POV~

One month had passed since we escaped the Maclaurin Provincial Army. We were staying at the royal palace in Aker, the nation with which we now had an alliance. Our relationship with the Akerian royal family was favorable, especially with Prince Philip. The royal family valued Majima-senpai highly because he had saved their citizens. I was also very happy to see others recognizing him.

Everyone who’d lost their homes in Rapha and Kehdo had been permitted to stay with us for a while. Those who weren’t injured had been kindly provided jobs in the castle town, and they had started working energetically. From what I’d heard, as the elves protected by the hero who’d turned back the provincial army, they had been received extremely well.

When Senpai heard of this hero talk, his expression had been complicated. It was easy to see how much he disliked the label, but since such rumors had a positive effect on the elves, he probably figured it wasn’t a bad thing and refrained from saying anything about it.

That was just the kind of person he was. It was exactly what I— Oh, I went off track. In any case, we’d established a stable life in Aker for now, but that didn’t mean we had peace of mind.

The Maclaurin Provincial Army’s hostility was sure to be as strong as ever, and we couldn’t predict how the Holy Order would act either. We didn’t even know what was going to happen next. Things could develop in a good way, or they could all fall apart. No matter how much power we had to protect one another, it was never enough.

Everyone had become so strong, but what about me? When I thought about that, I felt a little gloomy. I hadn’t been of much use during our flight from the provincial army. Not that I’d sat idly by; I’d helped treat Senpai as Holy Water assaulted him from the inside out. But I’d only been assisting Lily. It wasn’t much of a contribution.

That was how it’d been until now. In essence, all I could do was help others. Hypothesizing every possible situation and working out details that might be of use was nothing more than assisting someone else.

If only I had power, then I could protect everyone more directly. I was weak. I couldn’t even walk around town on my own, let alone face an enemy in battle. To any normal person in this world, my lack of strength was understandable. I was a visitor, though. I was supposed to be able to obtain great power.

Nevertheless, I was powerless and had remained that way all this time. Why was that? I’d always questioned this. Visitors manifested powers from a wish deep in our hearts, but that didn’t mean everyone could gain one. If one had no wish, or if one didn’t wish for it strongly enough, then no power would manifest.

That was exactly why I found it so weird.

I had no wish? I had one, but I didn’t wish for it strongly enough?

Impossible.

In truth, I’d been aware of what my wish was for a long time.

How could I not be? I wished for it so much that it hurt. I was certain that I put more weight into my wish than anyone else did into theirs, yet I still couldn’t manifest any power.

Really, why was that? Why did I...

No, let’s stop there.

Questioning it wouldn’t change reality. It’d be one thing if there were any signs that I could fix it, but I hadn’t found even the smallest thread leading to such an outcome this entire time. Thinking about it so casually wouldn’t bring me the answer. There was still much that we didn’t know about these powers to begin with.

I had so many questions about these cheats, or blessings as this world called them. Why could we gain such powers? When we teleported to this world, many of us should’ve questioned this, but as time passed, all saviors throughout history had come to accept that this was just how things were. It’d been the same for me. I’d even had the chance to learn that it was a physical law in this world.

This was a world where strong wishes came true. If that was how things worked, there was no point in challenging it. No matter how mysterious it seemed, disputing why an apple fell to the ground wouldn’t change reality. That was just how laws worked.

Nonetheless, even if I didn’t doubt the law, I could still feel that something was odd about it. To put it simply, something felt as if it didn’t obey this law. This was probably meaningful in some way, if not terribly important.

I could question this, but I couldn’t come up with the answer. If I just changed my perspective a bit, maybe I could figure it out, but I couldn’t identify what was wrong. I was at my limit.

Rose and the others seemed to be seriously misunderstanding it. All I ever did was think and think until I derived a conclusion. I wasn’t particularly talented or anything, and since my thoughts on the matter were so vague, I couldn’t provide advice for anyone even if they asked. It would only confuse them.

This really annoyed me. I couldn’t get my thoughts in order. Something felt off. Something was wrong with this world, but what?

The Holy Church extolled saviors.

The Holy Order employed only the saviors’ descendants, and those who could reproduce a savior’s power were called “beloved of blessed blood.”

The people saw the saviors as their emotional pillar.

This world wouldn’t be if not for the saviors.

According to the information I knew so far, this was apparently all true. However, if that was the case, why—

◆ ◆ ◆

“Mana?”

A voice brought me back to my senses. A pile of papers bound by a string sat on the desk in front of me. I was gripping a pen in my hand. The note I’d been writing had become unintelligible halfway through. I raised my head and saw that Rose had stopped working and was staring at me.

“Is something the matter?” she asked with a look of concern. “You’re making a frightening expression. It looks as if you’ve been working on something for a while now.”

“Oh. No. I wouldn’t call it work or anything,” I said in a fluster, shaking my head. “It’s like a journal or a notebook or the like. I just write down my thoughts to get them in order... Seems I was concentrating too hard, though.”

I tried touching my cheek, and just as Rose said, it felt tight. That was no good. I began massaging my cheeks to relax my tightened muscles. Before long, my emotions calmed down too.

“You’re so smart, Mana,” Rose said, looking at me in admiration. “I’m sure you notice many things I don’t even understand.”

She paused there, nodding to herself.

“Still, you mustn’t think too hard. Your body isn’t very strong, after all,” she added considerately before standing up. “Shall we take a little break? My master should be back about now, so I’ll prepare some tea.”

“Ah, hang on a sec. I’ll help too.”

I couldn’t just let her worry about me all the time. I got up from my chair and followed Rose, then suddenly remembered something and turned around.

My notebook was still open on the desk. In the end, that slight sense of discomfort remained unidentified and out of my reach. Was it just my imagination? Or would the day come when I figured it out? Either way, I couldn’t do anything about it now. I closed the notebook, then went after Rose.