Monogatari Series - Volume 24 - Chapter 2.14

014

It’s been two hours.

I’ve run around the town once – though for whatever reason, I feel like I’ve already run around town ten times (it’s an inwards spiral where each loop was shorter than the last); should I join the athletics team? I thought as I looked at the impressive time I set (but of course, that’d be stepping beyond unfair), but in the end, no dice.

I couldn’t even call it progress.

I wanted to say that knowing Benikujaku-chan isn’t in the school district alone would make the sweat I shed worth it, but that also means I have no other available recourse.

According to Hachikuji’s advice, I even looked for what I thought were the spots nobody would normally think of…though all that ended up in was a jogging course with a ‘what do I do if I really found a cat’ kind of feeling.

Since she’s not in the school district, that means the search area has extended indefinitely…much as I don’t want to admit it, I might be out of my depth with this one.

It’s completely out of my reach.

‘But that face doesn’t look like the face of a man who’s about to give up, Mister Vampy.’

Having set the finish of the jogging course to be the Beniguchi residence, I met with Ononoki-chan – or should I say, she was the one who met me there, with a high five.

She said what she said with the same expressionlessness.

Not the face of a man who’s about to give up, huh?

‘Where’s the young girl seductress? Sleeping on your shadow? She’s always like this. Taking a rest whilst others around her are doing all the hard work.’

‘Shinobu tried her hardest too – and you, Ononoki-chan? Finished searching the house?’

‘Why else would I be here if I’m not done? I know Mister Vampy’s headed to this house in a spiral.’

She really knows everything about where I am.

I can’t afford to do anything suspect.

‘Although to buy filthy magazines knowing that a tween girl’s watching presents an unmatchable thrill.’

‘Mister Vampy’s the unmatchable one. Don’t even think of buying gravure MILF mags under a tween girl’s watch. I’m getting put off.’

‘In all seriousness, now that I’m past eighteen and at uni, the fact that I can buy those legally does make life slightly less fun. I guess it’s something I’ve lost. I have you, Ononoki-chan, to thank for in injecting some of that excitement back.’

‘Don’t say it as though we’re rival creatives. I’m keeping an eye on you, and you’re being kept an eye on. Looks like surveillance, observation, and penalties aren’t enough. Incarceration would be for the best.’

So there’s an oddity prison?

‘So, how’s things? I have to say I’m quite looking forward to this.’

I misspoke with ‘looking forward’…as far as finding out what’s going on with the Beniguchis is concerned, unlike my jogging, the ideal scenario is to find nothing untoward at all.

If this story ends with ‘not all rumours are true’, then wouldn’t that be great…however, Ononoki-chan didn’t look happy at all.

Well, she’s expressionless by default, so nothing’s really changed, but;

‘It doesn’t look good.’

This answer is enough to tell how she feels – if corpses can feel, that is.

‘I am a specialist, a professional, so I’m in my natural habitat when it comes to investigations and support. I say that, but I’m a professional in oddity-related phenomena – so I went about it as I usually would, but I feel like I’m forced in seeing something I hate to see.’

‘Something you hate to see?’

‘At the very least, I couldn’t say what I saw was good. You owe me big time for this one, Mister Vampy.’

She says it doesn’t look good, but it doesn’t look like she wants to say what it is either…what abject horror am I going to see inside the Beniguchis…

The kind of reaction reminds me of that.

When I sneaked into the Hanekawa residence myself without anyone asking me to, when I gave myself a shock, when I came out dismayed, disorganised, discombobulated, and then, when I dashed away from it all.

‘But then, I am aware that every family has their own troubles. Don’t make that concerned face, I’ll go into it in detail…on our way back. Let’s go back. I don’t want to be here longer than I have to.’

‘Oh, uh…’

Between the exhaustion from feeling I’ve run a full marathon, and the futility from not being able to find anything, I really want to have a break, but she’s right, it’d be better if we stayed within the vicinity of the Beniguchis for as short as possible.

This house –

As far as I can see, it’s a moderately lavish and large house. If something’s happening inside, our lurking presence would be an unwelcome one.

As a health-conscious jogger, that means I’ll have to run somewhere else…I say that, I went to the front door to check the nameplate.

Just as Ononoki-chan said, in addition to the full names of both parents, there’s also the names of their two daughters – Beniguchi Hibari and Beniguchi Kujaku.

Atop Hibari’s name, a straight line crossing it out.

…Harsh, really. No need to cross her name out, is there?

‘One day, Beniguchi-chan’s name too will be crossed out’, I thought for a moment, before banishing that impropriety out from my brain.

‘Right then, Ononoki-chan. Open up your legs and let me crawl underneath.’

‘Why would you want to be humiliated like Han Xin did? We’ve been serious up until now. Has your brain gone haywire? No, don’t answer that, your head’s always been wired up wrong. Has all that running loosened up some more wires?’

An overly long retort, that.

She may not show it, but something really is bugging her. I’m worried.

Although she might say something along the lines of ‘I’m more worried about you’.

‘No, by that I meant get behind me, and just the head will do. I wanted you to get on my shoulder. You said you wanted to get going…’

‘I’m fine with you only doing that with the vampire seductress. That’s not a proper follow up, Mister Vampy. I myself am a transportational tool; I’m not to be transported’, Ononoki-chan replied.

‘I see. I’ll sit on your shoulder then…just like Shinobu carried me just now.’

‘Wait, what even happened while I was gone? Do you want me to “Unlimited Rulebook” your ass to Mars?’

You can do that?

I think that’d see a tale of the supernatural cross over into sci-fi territory…

‘As interested as I am in space operas, no thanks. Then let’s move, on our own separate pairs of feet.’

‘I want us to go our separate ways. A dismissal. Where are we heading?’

‘To the parkade. I’ve parked my car there. They charge by the hour, so I want to drive out of there quick as I can.’

‘Stingy-ass…’

‘It’s not stingy, it’s called thrift. I’m making sure I use the pocket change my parents gave me in a financially sustainable and responsible manner. Try standing in a uni student’s shoes.’

‘Not standing in anybody’s shoes. Just get a part-time job, for Pete’s sake.’

‘Hwhy’s e’rry’un tellin’ me to git a job?’

‘Because you should? What’s with that accent anyway? I should get big sis to deal with you instead.’

Weren’tchye talkin’ to me in that same tone, Ononoki-han?

Kids these days…

‘If you really want a job, I’m sure Gaen-san would be more than willing to recommend you a few. Just like that “mummy incident” that just went.’

‘If I work under her, I feel like I’ll never have it easy…’

‘Stop trying to have it easy. Be glad you’re even employed.’

Really tough, this ‘working’ business.

And besides, in any case, a promise has been made after the ‘mummy incident’ whereby Gaen-san won’t ever see me as long as I’m at uni – to never involve me in anything troublesome.

To not see her again is, for me, a lonely prospect, and I feel quite complicated about it; if you look at it differently, it also means she won’t save me when I’m in danger…but if I went and asked her for help, I feel it would be something that fits the expectations of that big sis who knows everything.

Either way, this case we’re facing isn’t severe enough to need Gaen-san’s advice.

That person, like Ononoki-chan, is a specialist in oddities, and not a specialist in humans, let alone a specialist in small girls.

But Ononoki-chan gave what sounded like an ominous prediction as she began walking:

‘By the way, if you ask me whether Gaen-san would keep that promise, I’d say she won’t.’

For now at least, it seems she already knows the way to the parkade and doesn’t need my help.

Which does make sense, since even though we went at different speeds, Ononoki-chan flew to this town, so like us, she’d already have a full view from up above.

‘……’

‘Mm? What’s the matter, Mister Vampy? You’ve stopped all of a sudden. I know, I know, since you insist, I’ll have you crawl between my legs. Give me a moment as I lift up my skirt.’

‘That’s not it. There’s one thing I forgot.’

‘Your common sense? Your conscience? Your moral compass?’

‘A search spot.’