Monogatari Series - Volume 20 - Chapter 1.23

023

I stepped aside and snuck away once this battle to the death commenced, successfully completing the first stage of my mission to infiltrate Kanbaru’s home. The Rainy Devil tried to chase after me, of course, but Ononoki did a beautiful job getting in her way.

I should be fine, given the state the two were in as I left─five hours had to be an exaggeration, but if Ononoki focused on defense, she’d never succumb to the Rainy Devil.

If anything, she might accidentally beat the Rainy Devil, in other words eliminate her without meaning to, but the shikigami seemed to understand the meaning of moderation in this world, perhaps in contrast to her counterpart in my world. Unless the situation took an extreme turn, I didn’t think it’d happen.

Which is to say it could, if the situation took an extreme turn─I was in no position to order Ononoki to risk her own demise and avoid delivering a fatal blow to Rainy Devil. This was no time to be relaxing, I needed to hurry up and investigate that bath.

In spite of my resolve, I immediately got lost. Kanbaru’s place is just too big─not to mention, I’d forgotten that left and right were switched around. What sounded like an extensive construction project on the lawn as my background music, I ran this way and that (that way and this?) until I discovered the bath at last.

“Phew…” I caught my breath for a moment.

Ten hours after I first got the idea of coming here on Kita-Shirahebi’s grounds, I’d pulled it off… It felt like some kind of accomplishment, but I still hadn’t done anything. Everything so far was like getting tips from all around on how to run a marathon, and only now was I hearing the starter gun’s bang.

By the way, where were Kanbaru’s grandparents, who lived here with her? We did come when they might be out─was that paying off? Not that it mattered who I met so long as it wasn’t the Rainy Devil, but it was better if our paths didn’t cross.

I traversed the dressing room, which was larger than my bedroom, and opened the sliding wood door to the space that contained the bath─fortunately, it was already filled. A stroke of luck, since it’d take more than just fifteen or thirty minutes to fill one of this scale from zero. Could the Rainy Devil have taken a morning bath like Karen and Tsukihi?

Staring at the bathwater of one of my juniors felt a little immoral…but I moved straight to studying the surface─at a slant, to see as much reflected light as possible.

“…”

I don’t know, I felt incredibly stupid accomplishing my goal here… What the hell I was up to, going so far as to involve a corpse doll? Nor was anything showing up on the surface, which almost felt like a forgone conclusion. Sure, the water did reflect the ceiling, but that was all─what was I gonna say to Ononoki?

No, I hadn’t expected this to work, and yes, I was grasping at straws, but faced with this outcome, I had to wonder why I’d bothered grasping at them at all. Did I think I was some sort of alchemist who turned straw into gold?

I splashed around with my hand to make a few waves but only created ripples. I was already searching for deft explanations I might give to keep Ononoki from making fun of me, but as I played around…

“Ah!” I remembered─the precise wording of the story I’d heard from Kanbaru. Right, the image of your future spouse appeared on the surface as you bathed. It was only a slight difference, but maybe standing outside the bath and looking at it, while clothed, diverged from the legend─hmm.

If this was a case of in for a penny, in for a pound, I was already in for that pound, but did I need to put up my whole wallet, or even my bank account? I couldn’t return empty-handed after coming this far… Well, I might have to, but that was no reason not to try everything.

Ononoki was battling the Rainy Devil, that brutal aberration, for my sake. Not only was there risk, she’d see very little return. This was for her, too─I had to strip nude! And take a nice little bath!

Fortunately, having tested it with my hand, the water was still warm. The culprit couldn’t have gone far─sorry, no, there was no need to reheat the bath.

I went back to the dressing room, threw off my clothes, and returned. Being naked in someone else’s home never felt quite right, but even if I needed to hurry, I couldn’t forget my manners. You don’t enter a bath without washing yourself down first─though if we’re talking about manners, using another family’s bath without permission was a massive breach of them.

When I listened closely, unmistakable destruction pierced the air every now and then─the battle seemed to rage on. I couldn’t give up when Ononoki was still fighting, I thought, and fought my own battle, lathering my body and showering it down… Preparations complete.

I entered the cypress tub. To take a bath.

Ooh, feels nice.

No, I needed to hurry.

To cut to the chase, after stripping, dipping in, and examining the water from an angle, nothing in particular happened─and honestly, I wasn’t expecting anything to.

Yeah. Things never go that well.

Why did I ever think this was a brilliant plan? How embarrassing… There was something wrong with me, that was the only explanation.

Fine, time for a new plan─maybe I should start by looking for the other Koyomi Araragi who lived in this world? Probably Ogi, but if it wasn’t Ogi…and then.

This was the quickest of dips, let alone counting to a hundred, but I stood up. That was when.

Rattle.

The wooden door to the bath slid open─what, how? Was the Rainy Devil here after defeating Ononoki? Impossible.

I was pretty sure the shikigami wouldn’t lose so easily, but more to the point, Suruga Kanbaru as the Rainy Devil didn’t open doors like a reasonable person. As she’d proved with the gate out front, she saw them as something to destroy, not use.

And indeed, it wasn’t Suruga Kanbaru, the Rainy Devil, standing on the other side of the door─but nor was it Ononoki after accidentally defeating her opponent.

Nor either of Kanbaru’s grandparents who’d been home the entire time. As roundabout as my description is, I have no surprise punch line.

Because I didn’t know this person.

Someone I was meeting for the first time─stood there completely naked.

Someone I’d never seen, nude like I’d never seen.

“Huh? Who the hell are you?” the stranger asked, making no effort whatsoever to cover up. Grasping in one hand a towel that stayed slung against her shoulder─unfazed.

The nude stranger was demanding to know who my nude self was.

“Hah, if you want to know someone’s name, you ought to introduce yourself first,” I summoned up everything I had to put up this front─as fazed as could be, desperate to hide my body, goading my stark naked and desperate self.

In any case, I couldn’t run away, couldn’t exit the bath without shoving aside this stranger who stood in the doorway. Since I didn’t dare to identify myself, my only real option was to turn the question around.

“I’m Toé Gaen.”

But she answered it, just like that.

“And now, who the hell are you? Better answer me this time, or else you’re not long for this world.”