WE WENT TO THE DEMON KING’S BIRTHDAY PARTY
It was just another day in the highlands when Pecora came to visit. I mean, I still wasn’t sure if it was okay for the demon king to simply pop over, but she did, and that was that.
“Hello! How are you doing, Elder Sister?”
Pecora arrived as I was outside hanging the laundry. With so many people in my family, there was a lot of it.
Pecora had quite a few things strapped to her back. It wasn’t very fitting for a demon king, but she probably wasn’t trying to act like one. Not that I would be familiar with what was fitting for a demon king, since Pecora was the only one I knew.
“I’m doing all right. We don’t really have to worry about sickness here.”
“I brought gifts for you all. First, for Sandra, some very nice soil.”
Just then, Sandra the mandragora burrowed through the earth toward us like an underground plow. “What kind of soil? I wanna try it.”
“Yes, here it is. It has the greatest softness and nutritional value that you can buy. The gardeners at Vanzeld Castle say it’s absolutely perfect.”
Sandra took the sack of soil from Pecora and ran her fingers (which were actually part of her hand-shaped roots) through it to check. “Ahhh, this is good. Look, it just settles between my roots. It tastes very rich, too.”
Tastes…? Well, I guess plants sense things in their own way.
“Oh, I brought so many things for you. This is a cursed ring for Miss Rosalie. It suits her perfectly, don’t you think?”
“Not…really what I’d expect to get from a girl.”
Pecora produced a somewhat repulsive ring. Well, Rosalie was a type of evil spirit, so maybe this would work for her.
I say evil, but of course, Rosalie wasn’t bad; spirits with absolutely no regrets couldn’t stay in this world, so the ones that did were, by definition, evil spirits.
“This is a book about an ancient human civilization that perished long ago; there are very few of these left among the demons. There are also essays talking about scientific techniques of the time, so this will be most interesting to both Shalsha and Falfa.”
From the way she explained it, it didn’t sound like something we should give to kids, but yeah, they’d definitely love it!
Still standing outside, Pecora started to take things out one by one to show me. She could have come inside to unpack, but she probably wanted to tell me about them.
“This is a magic item that can turn any mountain of your choosing into an active volcano. Please give it to Miss Laika if she ever finds herself in need of one.”
“Huh, that’s pretty convenient—and dangerous, sheesh!”
No one should be able to just make volcanoes!
“And here is an amulet that can summon a blizzard. Please use this when Miss Flatorte wishes to trap the province in ice and snow.”
“Um, no?!”
The gifts were getting worse and worse! She was listing items that could affect the fate of the humanity… Of course they’d be in the possession of the demon king!
“Also, here’s a permit for Miss Halkara for when she wants to open a shop in the demon lands.”
“I know I don’t have any right to say this, but these gifts aren’t very feminine at all…”
Of course, they would all make their recipients very happy, but they were too unique.
“And here are some sweets for you, Elder Sister.”
Pecora’s last gift was an adorable bag full of candy.
“And suddenly, something girly…”
“Of course! I am a girl, after all! Just a normal girl like everyone else.”
“You’re trying to bait me into an argument, aren’t you? But thanks. I’ll enjoy these.”
“Yes, there is absolutely nothing strange in them, so please enjoy them with perfect peace of mind.”
In this world, it was easy to mix up something normal with something very weird, so that information was rather important.
“I feel kind of bad; you gave us all this, and we don’t have anything to give you in return. Although, I guess the demon king probably doesn’t want for much. You already have everything you could ever desire at your fingertips.”
Buying a gift for a person who’s filthy rich is always hard. You can never figure out what’ll make them happy.
But then a suggestive smile crossed Pecora’s face. She had a plan; I could tell. I’d gotten pretty used to my little-sister figure’s machinations.
“Actually, my birthday is rather soon~ ”
“I see. So you want me to bring you something in exchange, then…?”
I hoped she wasn’t going to ask me to get something that was extremely difficult to obtain…
It would be like Kaguya-hime asking for a potential suitor…
“No, I do not need anything from you, Elder Sister. Instead, I would be happy enough if you were to attend my birthday celebration.”
It was hard to say no after all these gifts. As long as there were no extreme circumstances, I would be going. Plus, I was leading a laid-back lifestyle anyway.
“Okay, sure. If that’s all you want, then I’ll go.”
* * *
“…And, if possible, I would like you to come alone.”
After I expressed my intent to attend, she dropped an extra condition on me.
“What…? Alone…?”
“Yes, I am sorry. The transport wyvern I’m sending over is only for one, you see~ And the only room I could find for you was a single~ Oh, gosh~ I was so careless~”
“You definitely arranged it this way on purpose…”
You’re the demon king—you absolutely could’ve done something about rooming and transportation, at least. Fine, I get it; you want me to come alone.
“Well, if I let you call me Elder Sister, I should go to my little sister’s birthday party. It’d be weird to bring along my whole family, huh?”
“Oh, yes, yes~ That is exactly it~,” Pecora agreed with amusement. This was a part of one of her pranks. She had to be a little extra; otherwise, she couldn’t sleep at night.
“Fine. I get it. You can stop dropping hints; I’ll come alone.”
“Thank you so much. You do know me well, Elder Sister~”
Even though I was still putting up the laundry, she squeezed my arm in a hug.
After that, Pecora had a cup of tea inside, then went straight home. She was busy with all sorts of demon business, yet she still would visit the house in the highlands from time to time. Not as often as Beelzebub, though.
She left me with an invitation containing “details regarding the Celebratory Birthday Gala of Her Highness the Demon King.”
Before long, the day came for me attend Pecora’s birthday party.
Strictly speaking, it was a “celebratory gala,” but since the demon king herself was frivolous, I decided to slap the casual label of party on it for myself anyway.
The wyvern arrived at the house in the highlands right on time, so my mode of transport was secured.
Laika and my daughters came to see me off.
“Mommy! Be sure to buy souvenirs!”
“Life is but a series of fleeting encounters, though I’m sure we will meet again.”
“Make sure you take time to rest your bones. What are bones anyway?”
My three daughters all called after me. I already saw Sandra as my own. I wasn’t related to any of them, but I wanted to treat them fairly.
“Be nice to one another, okay?”
“Mistress! I, Flatorte, already fought with Laika yesterday, so we’ll be fine for a while!” Flatorte was brimming with confidence. Why was she treating it like a sunny day after a typhoon?!
“If you’re going to fight, then just…pinch each other’s cheeks or something. And absolutely no real dragon battles, got it?”
“This dragon is always in a good mood so long as she eats enough, so I will make food if it comes down to it.” Laika sounded like she was planning on subtly taming Flatorte.
“Well, I won’t be gone for long, so I’m sure you’ll manage. See ya!”
I hopped on the wyvern and headed straight for Vanzeld Castle.
I arrived at Vanzeld Castle without any accidents, but—it went without saying that the hall was filled with demons.
Gathered all together like this, they made for a thrilling sight. Demons of sizes that humans could never even imagine were the norm here. To accommodate them, the ceiling was very high.
There was a calendar on the wall that said THE DEEDS OF HER MAJESTY PROVATO PECORA ARIÉS. So much was written there that I immediately decided to stop reading.
This girl was so long-lived that no human could ever match what she’d accomplished so far in her lifetime… And it included more mundane things like repairing embankments, creating lakes for irrigation, and so on. Not exactly thrilling.
“Well, if it isn’t Azusa. Welcome.”
I recognized Beelzebub’s voice right away. Even at a gala, Beelzebub was still wearing her regular outfit. Maybe it also counted as formal wear.
“Once she asked me to come, I couldn’t not show up.”
“Indeed. The demon king is enthusiastic about your attendance. There is still time before she arrives, so why don’t I show you around the venue?”
“Sure, I’ll take you up on that.”
I would’ve been all alone at an event like this, so I was thankful for Beelzebub’s suggestion.
“There are several rooms next to the grand hall. Next to us is the exhibition room for Her Majesty’s records.”
“Huh. I guess when you live for so long, you can become a historical figure while you’re still alive.”
When I thought in terms of time periods, Pecora would have easily been demon king since the Edo period of Japan, so that wasn’t a strange thought at all.
The idol outfit she wore before was on display.
“She put this up?!”
She definitely has better stuff than this! Why’d she pick this one?!
“The music festival is an incredibly important event for the demons, you see… ’Tis only natural to celebrate the deeds… Yes, it is not a problem at all…” Beelzebub didn’t seem convinced herself. “And the original festival documents were sent to storage…”
“She is influencing you!”
“But as a result, the number of people visiting the exhibitions has greatly increased. It seems there are few who would like to see pieces from festivals past…”
Ah, managing cultural artifacts must be a difficult job… Even in Japanese museums, no one would really be pumped to see a whole collection of farm tools from the Edo period.
In addition to the idol outfit, there were also cups and socks that Pecora often used, as well as candy that she often ate—the whole thing was so vivid. In a way, it was the demon king’s cult of personality…
I also saw a graph that plotted the change in attendance numbers over time.
On the plaque, it said that not many gave her a second glance at first, but she decided she would fight to become a shining star; as a result, she climbed her way up to being an idol known to all demonkind.
“It’s like the story of an idol who started as a nobody before getting her big break…”
But then the exhibit took a drastic turn for the serious.
“In the next corner, we have 100 Views of the Demon Lands, selected by Her Majesty.”
There were landscape paintings as well as a map with buttons. I pressed one of them, and one part of the map lit up red. I assumed it was telling me where the picture was.
We had these in Japanese museums, too…
“Next are 100 Select Waters of the Demons, chosen by Her Majesty.”
“This isn’t very entertaining.”
It was hard to deny how mundane this was compared with the idol corner.
“You are correct. That is why we have plans to redo this area into something more exciting, but we are currently debating if that is suitable for a historical exhibition hall. This project is currently under consideration by the minister of education as well as other officials. I am so glad I am the minister of agriculture.”
“I just saw a microcosm of modern Japan in the demon lands again…”
Museums weren’t amusement parks, so it wasn’t like entertainment value was the highest priority, but it still wasn’t good if people weren’t coming.
“Hmm, ’tis almost time for Her Majesty to appear. Let us return to the hall.”
“Okaaay. The displays are starting to get a little mundane, so perfect timing.”
“I think the same, but those thoughts are best kept to yourself!”
The gala was like a cocktail party, so I could just pick a spot and wait until the bugle sounded.
“The demon king makes her entrance! Please greet her with a round of applause!” shouted a demon who appeared to be the MC.
Applause followed, and Pecora appeared, wearing a dress. She looked classier than normal—well, it was her birthday party.
“Everyone, thank you for attending today’s celebratory gala. I’m sure you all will hate it if I stand here talking for long, so I will keep this brief. Farewell! The party continues, so please eat and drink as much as you like! Thank you!”
That was short! What was that, fifteen? Maybe twenty seconds? Sure, it was a considerate greeting for her guests, but was that really okay…?
And then, after her unbelievably short address, Pecora actually left the room.
Around me, I could hear people murmuring among themselves.
“Wow, as short and sweet as last year.”
“The previous demon kings just droned on and on. This is much better. Sooo much better.”
So it really was well received…
But as someone who had been invited here directly, it didn’t sit very well with me. Did she want me to come all this way just for that…?
Then Fatla, a leviathan, quickly approached me. She was every bit her little sister Vania’s opposite. She was proper, punctual, and the most “public servant–like” out of all the demons I knew.
“Pardon me, Miss Azusa. How have you been?”
“It’s good to see you again. I’m just shocked that someone at the top of the world would give such a short address.”
“Her Majesty has ordered me to escort you to the dining table. Please come with me.” Fatla took me by the hand and led me away.
“Wait, there are dining tables here?!”
Fatla dragged me off, ignoring my reaction.
She brought me to a room, and there was a table with two chairs facing each other and two place settings with knives and forks.
Basically, she wanted me to sit here.
“Ohhh, I get it.”
I understood why I was invited. The main event was starting now. I was going to have dinner with Pecora.
“Well then, if you’ll excuse me.” Fatla gave a polite, bureaucratic bow before leaving the room.
“I guess she wants her older-sister figure to give her a proper celebration.”
“Exactly!” Pecora (quite literally) chose that moment to enter from another room.
“The party cannot begin until you wish me a happy birthday, Elder Sister! The ceremony was just a bonus! A little extra!” Pecora smiled as shyly as a young girl.
Now that I thought about it, the person in question probably wasn’t very happy with such a lavish celebratory gala. If I were in her position, I’d think it was too much and would want them to stop.
At least, if there was someone out there who wanted the whole province to hold a ceremony for the Witch of the Highlands, I’d shut that down quick. I’d always told the village of Flatta not to do stuff like that.
What she really wanted was probably a small birthday party like this. It was much nicer to have people close to you genuinely celebrating with you.
“By the way, Pecora, you sure it’s okay you don’t dine with the other important demons?”
“They can mingle as they eat, so it’s all right. And I’ve made sure to fill my recent schedule with dinner meetings so that no one feels left out.”
Pecora wasn’t dumb when it came to that stuff. She knew exactly what she was doing.
“All right, let’s get to celebrating my little sister’s birthday.” There was a glass bottle of water on the table, so I filled Pecora’s glass.
“Oh, thank you, Elder Sister.”
“Today’s your day, after all. This is a given.”
“Then I shall do the same for you.” Pecora poured me some water, too, so that we both had a drink.
“Happy birthday, Pecora.”
“Thank you very much, Elder Sister. ”
I clinked my glass against Pecora’s. She saw me as her older sister, but I’d never really played the role for her. So today, I would. That was my birthday present to her.
Vania brought out the food; apparently, she was in charge of cooking. “I will be your chef for the day. Happy birthday, Your Majesty. First, please enjoy this smoothie of erebus greens and purgatorium sprouts.”
The names of the vegetables were off-putting, but I could tell that this food was of the highest quality.
“Pecora, if there’s anything that’s bothering you, you can tell me.”
“Well, I am not entirely unbothered, but you don’t understand serious political talk, do you?” Pecora said mischievously.
“Of course not. I’m a witch, not a politician.”
“I am just fine spending time with you like this, Elder Sister.”
It was a commendable thing for her to say.
That was why I slipped. “That’s easy enough for me to handle.”
“Then could you stay here with me for three to five days?”
She got brazen real fast…
“Five days…? I guess that’s fine, so long as you let the house in the highlands know… They might get worried if they don’t hear from me…”
I never told them when I’d be back. Where was e-mail when you needed it? Fantasy worlds could be so inconvenient sometimes.
“Five days should be all right, then? I understand. Chef Vania, why don’t you bring out the main course?”
“Right away, my king!”
Only people in fantasy worlds said stuff like that!
At Pecora’s behest, Vania brought out a meat dish arranged with very aromatic mushroom slices lined up beside it. They were probably truffles.
“These mushrooms are definitely the expensive kind.”
“Yes. A plate of this in the human lands would fetch about fifty thousand gold. Absurd, if you ask me.”
Oh, I’ve seen this kind of thing before, when comedians guess the price of dishes at restaurants…
Of course, I’d never been to a restaurant of this caliber in my past life, so I was getting nervous. But it was more delicious than nerve-racking; I could tell it was full of high-quality flavors. Truffles and caviar weren’t expensive because they were rare, but because they had a delicate taste. My common tongue still didn’t totally recognize that taste as a good one…
“Eat as much as you want. I’ve made sure you have plenty of mushrooms, Elder Sister. These dishes would surely be worth three times a normal restaurant serving.”
That meant they were worth a hundred and fifty thousand gold! I would cry if I had to pay that out of pocket!
“I almost don’t want to eat it now, but it would be weird of me to refuse the generosity of the demon king.”
I took a bite as I wondered how many magic stones from slimes that would equal.
The meat and the mushrooms were so tender, they practically melted on my tongue.
And Vania deserved some serious credit, too, as the one preparing all this…
If you ignored her scatterbrained tendencies, her skill offset everything else.
“By the way, for a period of time, there was a very popular game in the town surrounding Vanzeld Castle. The idea was that people would order food at very expensive restaurants without looking at the price, and the one whose guess was furthest from the actual amount had to pay for everyone’s meals.”
“It’s the same in every world!”
“Some only joined to savor the cuisine they could never hope to afford themselves, and they ended up having to work for a year as a servant.”
“Quite a risk…”
The demons were the type to take their punishment games seriously, too. Beelzebub had already warned me never to play anything in one of their casinos.
“And at the beginning of every year, we often play a game where people compare two items, such as glasses of wine, and guess which is high-quality and which is cheap.”
“I feel like we had games like that, too…”
“Those who get it wrong are downgraded to regular demon, then second-class demon, then third-class demon, then finally deemed unseen, and a spell is cast on them so that no one acknowledges them for a while.”
Like I said—ruthless!
“Beelzebub once kept getting it wrong and fell down to third class… Heh-heh, she panicked so much… Oh, please don’t tell her I told you.”
“I had no idea that happened to her!”
She didn’t act like a hereditary noble, so she must’ve given herself away. That was some juicy info.
Pecora had invited me here, so I could eat all the overpriced food I wanted without making my wallet cry. Oh how I love the taste of free.
But it made me careless.
“Now then, Elder Sister. There is something that I would like for my birthday, but it’s rather hard to obtain, you see.” Pecora broached the subject just before dessert came.
“Huh, what is it?”
Is she going to ask me to kiss her…? I hope not…
A grin spread across her face, telling me I’d walked right into her trap.
This definitely wasn’t a kiss or a romantic-type thing.
“What I want is a fluffy elder sister.”
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