Grimgal of Ashes and Illusion - Volume 12 - Chapter 3

3. Night Monster

So, the thing Kiichi found... this is it, huh?

Haruhiro was standing in the shadow of a tree, holding his breath and making sure he had the right grip on his dwarven dagger.

Had this dagger really been made over a hundred years ago? It was hard to believe.

He’d often heard how wonderful the techniques of dwarven smiths were, and it didn’t look like they fell short of their reputation. Aside from the intricate designs on the blade and hilt, it was an ordinary dagger, but when he held it, he could tell the difference.

The balance was good. It was clearly going to be easy to us. It also only took a little sharpening before a smooth texture appeared. The one he had called the flame dagger had a unique shape, but there seemed to be a hidden secret to it. It felt right when he swung it, and it cut really well.

Having good weapons in hand, that was reassuring. It was like having an invisible pillar standing up in the center of his body. If he got into trouble, he could lean on that pillar, which wouldn’t be budged easily.

Something interrupted his concentration. There was the sound of something heavy being dragged, and of hard things scraping together.

Haruhiro’s comrades had already withdrawn to the nearby ridge. He had come here to scout alone. That said, he didn’t have the guts to get too close, and it wasn’t necessary. He hadn’t come all the way down from the ridge.

They were about ten meters below, moving through a valley.

The clouds drifted, and the moonlight shone down.

He saw what they were.

Humans, huh? That, or a race similar to humans. They were probably armed. He couldn’t call their pace fast. It was slow as if they were completely exhausted at times, and strangely awkward at others. For some of them, one shoulder seemed unnaturally lowered, or the entire body tilted to one side, like a procession of defeated soldiers wounded in battle. This was apparently called a dead man’s parade.

They were dead men. Not one was alive. They were moving corpses.

If he were to categorize them, the ones that still had flesh, rotting or not, were zombies, and the ones who had been reduced to just bones were skeletons. But whether they were skeletons or zombies, if you thought about it normally, their nerves and muscles couldn’t be functioning properly, so they wouldn’t be able to move.

They shouldn’t be moving.

People said that the curse of No-Life King made it possible, but what exact mechanism was moving them? Or were they being manipulated like puppets?

Haruhiro decided he wanted to get a bit closer. No, that was wrong. He wanted to test something.

He took a deep, deep breath.

There were three basic techniques he needed to use.

First: eliminate his presence with Hide.

Second: move with Swing while his presence was eliminated.

Third: utilize all of his senses to detect the presences of others with Sense.

To give an image to it, it was like this.

He’d sink beneath the ground without a sound. Once he dove in, it was less like being underground and more like the sea. He could move freely. Then, putting just his eyes and ears above the surface, he would look at, listen to, and feel all the things above the ground.

Stealth. He’d have been able to get into it. Before.

But this was no good.

He could get to a good place. He was almost there. If he could get past it, he’d be in. Despite that, something was holding Haruhiro back.

Naturally, Stealth wasn’t that simple to do. But he’d been able to do it. For a time, he’d even been able to flip it on and off in an instant.

Haruhiro had the feeling of what it was like to be fully in Stealth firmly embedded in his mind. His field of vision quickly expanded, he saw things he couldn’t see, he heard things he couldn’t hear, and he could even touch and feel things at a distance. He saw and heard too much, his consciousness leaving his body, and it gave him an illusion like he was looking down at himself and the area around him at an angle.

Not bad, he had thought. Even a mediocre human like me can do this sort of thing if I try hard and stubbornly enough. The potential that people hold is amazing.

But now...

I can’t go there now. It may be one, no, a half step away, but that difference is huge. The difference between being able to enter it and not is just too big of a difference. If I can enter Stealth properly, I can’t even sneak up behind enemies that are searching for me with the intent to kill. It doesn’t even feel like I might screw up. If the enemy is about to turn, I know it like the back of my hand.

Haruhiro ducked down.

Is this what they call a slump? he wondered.

When had it started? Had there been some trigger for it?

There had been. Possibly.

While being chased by the guorellas, they had fled into a jail-like building, despite the approaching guorellas still needing to be dealt with.

The leader. He had needed to take down the guorellas’ leader.

In order to do that, he’d tried to go into Stealth, but likely because of his exhaustion, he hadn’t been able to do it well.

Then that had happened to Merry.

A presence jerked him away from his memories. He thought his heart was going to stop.

Haruhiro inhaled as he leapt into the air, his dagger at the ready.

Merry was standing there, eyes wide, no more than three meters away from Haruhiro. She looked awfully surprised, but Haruhiro was, too. Or rather, Haruhiro was far more surprised.

“Wha...” he burst out.

No, no. They couldn’t talk loudly here. The valley just beneath them was full of zombies and skeletons.

Haruhiro approached Merry, taking care not to make loud footsteps.

“Why are you here?” he whispered.

Merry hung her head in thought for a bit, and then almost-whispered back, “I was worried. You were acting a bit weird, Haru.”

“Huh? Really? I don’t think so.”

“I could have been imagining it. Sorry.”

“N-No need to apologize... Did you come here alone?”

“It’s fine.”

“Okay.” Haruhiro nodded vaguely.

Merry started to walk. She soon stopped. From there, she could look down into the valley.

“The dead...” she murmured.

“Yeah.” Standing beside Merry, Haruhiro went to sheathe his dagger, then stopped, adjusting his grip on the weapon. Then he sheathed it after all. “I hear it’s No-Life King’s curse, though.”

“Do you think that, Haru?”

“I can’t say. They do call it a curse, though.”

“I...” Merry bit her lip.

Her jaw was trembling. It had to hurt. Her lip, it was going to bleed. He wanted to say something. But for some reason, he couldn’t. Merry was staring intently at the dead.

Suddenly, a thought occurred to Haruhiro. Maybe it wasn’t him she was worried about, but she wanted to see the dead for herself. But, if so, for what reason?

“There must be something wrong with me,” Merry whispered. “I’m making everyone worry. I know that.”

“Yeah, we worry about you. Of course. We’re comrades, after all. We have to care.”

“It’s probably just that it doesn’t feel right. Even though I’m me.”

“I... Nothing’s going to change between us.”

“I know that, too.”

Merry still had her eyes on the dead. Without looking at Haruhiro, she smiled just a little.

“Shihoru and Yume, they both lend me a shoulder when I need one. And Kuzaku, he’s not avoiding me. Of course, you aren’t, either. I think Setora is a good person, too. Her gray nyaa is cute, after all. It’s just... it feels like a lie. I’m a little afraid to go to sleep. This is going to sound cliche, but I don’t know what I’d do if this was all a dream. If this is a dream, I want to make it clear to myself what is real and what is a dream. But I’m scared. I don’t want to know.”

“Merry...”

“I may be running away. I think I shouldn’t run away. I... there’s something wrong with me. I’m sure... I’ve changed. But I don’t want to think so. If I’m messed up, I want you to tell me. I’m scared to hear it, but I’m just as scared you won’t tell me.”

“Listen, Merry...”

“I want you to stop me. I’m supposed to be here, but it’s like I’m somewhere else. Where am I? I know. I’m here. And yet I don’t know. It’s not always, but there are times I just don’t know. The wind is strong, and I feel like I’m going to be blown away. Where am I? Someone tell me. I—”

If he let her go on, Merry’s voice was going to get louder and louder. In the end, she’d be shouting. That would be a little too much.

He had to do something. Could Haruhiro really say that was the only thing he was thinking? It was a sudden thing, and he couldn’t explain it in detail, but it was like he was feeling this, this, and this, so he did this. He couldn’t help but do it.

He hugged Merry.

For Haruhiro, in that moment, hugging Merry was the only option.

Well, he might be an idiot, but Merry wasn’t. She acted reflexively to protect herself. Because of that, her arms were now in between the two of them.

Should I let go? Haruhiro wondered. If anything, I have to let go. That’s obvious, isn’t it? What am I doing, hugging her like this? I’m not just maybe an idiot; I’m an honest-to-goodness idiot.

But Merry didn’t move her arms. Didn’t budge. Didn’t try to push Haruhiro away.

Merry was tall for a woman, and Haruhiro wasn’t big. But...

She sure is a girl, he thought.

Maybe it was the bone structure, or the muscle mass. Those things had to be different between men and women. Whatever the reason, even when he hugged her straight-on like this, Merry fit snugly into Haruhiro’s arms.

The thought that he could protect her, could keep her rooted... honestly, he didn’t think that one bit. Haruhiro didn’t think he had the right, the abilities, or the capacity to do such a thing.

If he set aside the question of whether he was capable of it or not, though, he wanted to protect her, of course. That was what made him all the more scared, numbing his legs, so he couldn’t take a step.

No, that wasn’t it. It wasn’t that he couldn’t take a step; it was that he didn’t.

“You’re right here, Merry,” he murmured. “Next to me. You don’t need to think you don’t know where you are, and I won’t let you. Because I can sense you’re right here, Merry.”

He was scared, worrying he’d blurt out something strange. He couldn’t remember the words a moment after they’d left his mouth in this state, so he couldn’t even decide if they were weird or not.

Merry let out a sigh. Her body was hardly tense at all anymore. “I’ve always wanted you to do this.”

Before asking, Huh? What does that mean? Haruhiro brought his lips up to a spot a little above Merry’s left ear. Merry shuddered, and she let out a sigh.

His face was buried in Merry’s hair. He could smell her scent.

Oh, crap. Am I acting like a deviant? Or maybe not? Having no experience to draw from, Haruhiro didn’t know where this act fell on that scale. I feel like I’m doing something pretty bold. I think any more would be too much.

Would it be? Was this the limit? Having come this far, and trying this hard, was Haruhiro going to end up regretting this later?

I mean, we might never get into a situation like this again. Probably, we won’t, right? Merry didn’t seem to be put off by it. Probably. In that case, shouldn’t I try to push on to the next thing? ...Next? What comes next?

Uhhh.

I dunno. Not about that. Could I take this back with me to think on? No? I can’t? It has to be now? Only now? Well, yeah. Of course.

“Do you wanna...” he began.

What had Haruhiro been about to ask her? Was he going to ask her that? Really ask her? Merry? He wasn’t so sure about that. There was no two ways about it. He couldn’t ask. No. Absolutely not. Even Haruhiro knew that much.

“...head back?”

There was a momentary pause.

“Sure.” Merry nodded, then suddenly smiled.

Somehow, it felt wrong to say, I’m sorry, but right now, Haruhiro desperately wanted to apologize. He wanted to pull off a kowtow that would put the legendary kowtow master to shame.

He wouldn’t though, okay? There was no way he would. He couldn’t do that, right?

Haruhiro backed away, releasing Merry from his arms. He wanted to bow apologetically, at least. No, he wasn’t going to do it, though. But his body was honest. His face had turned downwards on its own.

“I’m sure everyone is waiting,” she said.

If Merry hadn’t said that for him, Haruhiro would never have been able to walk away from there.

Haruhiro and Merry returned to the ridge where their comrades were. Shihoru and Yume were sitting with their backs against a tree, leaning against each other and snoring softly. Kuzaku was half-asleep, too, but when he noticed Haruhiro and Merry he just said, “Oh...” and waved slightly.

What was that attitude for? What was up?

Kiichi may have been out looking around, because he was nowhere to be seen.

Setora was the only one standing.

“Oh, it’s you two,” she said briskly. “You were fast.”

“...Oh?” Haruhiro asked nervously. “Really?”

Huh? What’s that supposed to mean? Fast at what? Why?

He couldn’t ask.

Haruhiro had an awfully sleepless night that night.