6
“Liar! Six, you’re a liar! Dragonslayer my ass! That’s a sparrow! That’s just an overgrown sparrow!”
“Don’t blame me, it’s this planet’s ecosystem that’s screwed up. But the important thing is the bird poop. Could you hurry up and gather it?”
The Sky King is a sparrow.
A really, really big sparrow.
It’s so big, it makes the griffin I fought look small.
“This isn’t right. The aerodynamics wouldn’t work if you scaled a sparrow to that size!”
“Please stop rambling and hurry up with the poop sample. Lady Lilith, as a scientist, you must be good at gathering samples, right?”
The giant sparrow hops around the wasteland, pecking at the ground with its beak.
“What do we do, Six? I can’t exterminate a sparrow! When I was little, I picked up a weakened sparrow and nursed it back to health… I’ve had an attachment to them ever since…”
“You’re a Supreme Leader of an evil organization! You’re not supposed to be so cute and sentimental! That’s not gonna win you any cool-boss points!”
Lilith and I are hiding behind a random boulder, arguing while watching the sparrow from a distance.
“Hey, Six, the Sky King is known for its curiosity. Why don’t Lady Lilith and I go gather the Sky King’s droppings while you draw its attention?”
Snow, the only one unfazed by the giant bird, pitches her plan.
“Yeah, no. That plan will get me eaten for sure. Your fancy head of snow-white hair would be way better for drawing its attention. I’ll do the dirty work of gathering the poop, so go be a knight for once.”
“No, no, I can’t possibly let my commander do something as filthy as gathering bird waste. This sort of dirty work is something for the rank and file. You should have the honor of acting as bait.”
……
“Hey, that reminds me. Why are you, of all people, so eager to go digging through poop? Do people pay tons of money for Sky King poop or something?”
“O-of course not! I’ve no ulterior motives! I’ve been learning about science from Alice while helping her. Yes, that’s it. I’m working to fulfill my scientific curiosity! I just want to poke around the Sky King’s poop. I have no other motives!”
“Would you two cut it out with all this poop talk? Poop this and pee that. You sound like a pair of ten-year-olds.”
Lilith’s voice is thick with exasperation, but I actually think her comment is pretty insulting to ten-year-olds. I’m pretty sure they’re a lot smarter than that.
“Tch, we’re just wasting time arguing. I’ll go draw its attention, so you two better grab its poop. If it’s valuable, we’re splitting the profits!”
“Okay, leave it to me! Oh, just so we’re clear, the droppings themselves don’t have any value. However, it’s possible we might find some valuables buried in them.”
Based on Snow’s description, I assume that means various shiny objects.
“ Sigh , can’t you two phrase it a little better…?”
I leave behind a muttering Lilith and start running toward the Sky King.
“The Sky King likes shiny objects! If you’ve got something valuable, use it to draw the bird’s attention!”
“Yo, over here, birdbrain! Look at this!”
As I step out from my hiding spot, the Sky King stops pecking at the ground and turns to look at me.
“It’s the giant golden beetle I found in the Cursed Forest! If you want this, you better—”
“Heeeeey, what the heck are you doing?! That’s my beetle!”
Despite Lilith’s ambivalence when I first offered it to her, it looks like she’s grown attached to the beetle, and she lets out a shrilled objection.
Captivated by the shimmering golden insect, the Sky King locks its gaze onto my hand.
I gently place the beetle at the Sky King’s feet…
…and watch it promptly devour my offering in a single bite.
“Now!”
“What do you mean, ‘now’?! It ate it! It just ate my precious beetle!”
As we speak, the poor bug is becoming acquainted with the Sky King’s stomach.
“Six, when I said shiny things, I meant jewels and precious metals!” yells Snow as she edges toward the Sky King.
“In that case, leave it to me! Look at thiiiiis!”
Learning my lesson from the loss of my golden beetle, I pull out something shiny the Sky King won’t gobble up.
It’s my prized possession: the necklace I bought to placate a certain clingy disaster who’s been begging me for a new one.
I feel like it’s brimming with the accumulated wrath of a vengeful spinster, but with this…!
I swing Grimm’s necklace around to draw the Sky King’s attention…
“Chirp.”
“Oh.”
Instead of the necklace, the Sky King grabs me .
“…Lady Lilith, it seems this is it for me. Working at Kisaragi was awful and abusive, but still, I had fun here and there. Please give my regards to Lady Astaroth and Lady Belial…”
“Don’t give up! Hang on, Six, I’ll shoot that thing down, and…”
“Wait, Lady Lilith! The Sky King is a Guardian Beast! I can’t have you slaying it!”
“Chirp!”
Gripped in the Sky King’s talons, I’m carried high into the air.
No Comments Yet
Post a new comment
Register or Login