Prologue
Case A
Family Y living in western Tokyo (City H)
Father: Works at a foodstuffs company (45)
Mother: Housewife (39)
Son: Elementary school (9)
Daughter: Elementary school (7)
[After dinner]
Son: “Hey, let’s go to AmaBri! The Variable Moffle campaign ends next Sunday! We can still get it if we go now! Variable Moffle! We gotta go!”
Daughter: “I wanna dance with the ABC ladies! I wanna be an idol! I wanna go to AmaBri!”
Mom: “What are you talking about? We went to AmaBri last year, and you spent the entire time bored!”
Son: “Aw, but...”
Mom: “Daddy took time out of his busy schedule to take you, but you hated it! Have you forgotten already?”
Daughter: “Nuh-uh! Nuuuh-uhhhh!”
Mom: “Oh, these children! Say something to them, dear!”
Dad: “Ah... well, I might like to see Elementario, myself.”
Mom: “What? What was that?”
Dad: “Oh... nothing.”
Son: “I get it! Elementario’s sexy! Real sexy! I saw Daddy grinning at pictures of the Spirit of Wind lady on his smartphone!”
Mom: “......”
Dad: “Th-That’s preposterous. I was researching local celebrities for a promotional campaign. For work! ...And I wasn’t grinning that much.”
Mom: “Ah... I’ve seen them on pamphlets. You can’t really want to use those cheap women in tawdry outfits.”
Dad: “Hey!”
Mom: “What?” (glares)
Dad: “Ah... nothing. You’re right.”
Mom: “And why were you grinning at her on your smartphone?”
Dad: “I wasn’t! Our son is spreading malicious lies.”
Daughter: “I like Salama!”
Dad: “Oh, uh... do you?”
Son: “She’s sexy! I like Kobory!”
Mom: “Both of you! Stop this ‘sexy’ talk right—”
Dad: “I...”
Mom: “Dear?”
Dad: “I... I like Sylphie!!!”
Mom: “Dear?!”
Dad: “The tits! The tits!”
Daughter: “Daddy’s broken!”
Dad: “Permit me a rant! Sylphie-san looks just like a Hollywood actress I loved when I was in middle school! The golden 80s! I went breathless for her! That was thirty years ago! And lately I’ve been working through a midlife crisis, and I don’t get breathless over any women at all! Whenever there’s a news story about a man my age getting arrested for groping on the train... I feel secretly jealous of the perpetrator! I mean... imagine being my age and being unable to restrain yourself on a crowded train... it’s enviable, isn’t it?!”
Mom: “Dear?!”
Dad: “There, in my darkest hour, Sylphie-san appeared like a ray of light! I can still get it up! I can still get breathless! And I can also apply myself at my job!”
Mom: “But what about me?!”
Dad: “But you said it before, dear! You called their outfits tawdry! You wouldn’t do it, would you? You wouldn’t cosplay as Sylphie?!”
Mom: “Y-You know that I wouldn’t!”
Daughter: “I-I’ll do it, Dad! Calm down!”
Dad: “Daughter! That would mean nothing! Only human garbage would get breathless for his daughter!”
Daughter: “You’re already human garbage!”
Dad: “So be it, then! Darn it, we’re going to AmaBri this weekend! One eyeful of the Elementario show will sustain me for the rest of my life!”
Son: “I don’t think I wanna go to AmaBri anymore...”
Daughter: “Same...”
Case B
Couple attending Private University C, Tokyo Suburbs
Mr. A: Law student, 3rd year (21)
Ms. B: Literature student, 3rd year (20)
Mr. A: “Where do you wanna go this Saturday?”
Ms. B: “Oh, anywhere’s fine...”
Mr. A: “How about AmaBri? I’ve heard it’s gotten way better since the renovation.”
Ms. B: “Huh? AmaBri? No way... I heard it’s awful.”
Mr. A: “Yeah, but I told you, they had a renovation.”
Ms. B: “Yeah, but... still...”
Mr. A: “...Okay, fine. Hmm... what about Tama Kartland?”
Ms. B: “Huh? Tama Kartland? Never heard of it...”
Mr. A: “It’s near school. It’s got go-karts. It’s fun!”
Ms. B: “I’m not much of a driver...”
Mr. A: “O-Okay... Well, what else is good? Hmm... what about Sanrio Crystal Land? It’s for girls and it’s indoors, so we can still go if it rains.”
Ms. B: “Oh, that’s for kids. I went there a ton in elementary school.”
Mr. A: “...I see. How about Kochiragaoka Playground? It’s a little on the old side, of course...”
Ms. B: “No way. I went there with my ex. Bad memories.”
Mr. A: “......... Okay...”
Ms. B: “A, are you mad?”
Mr. A: “Huh? Of course not. Um... um... let’s see, where to go, then...”
Ms. B: “Seriously, I don’t care. Just pick someplace already!”
Mr. A: “Um... nothing’s coming to mind. Um...”
Ms. B: “Mr. A, you’re really not mad?”
Mr. A: “I’m really not mad... But I really do hear AmaBri’s good recently. A friend from my class went and said it was really fun.”
Ms. B: “A friend? Who? A girl?”
Mr. A: “No, a guy. And AmaBri offers a discount for local students—”
Ms. B: “A guy was going to an amusement park? Was it really a guy?”
Mr. A: “Yeah. Anyway, he said AmaBri was great. It’s just a bus ride away from Tsubakigaoka—”
Ms. B: “I think you’re hiding something.”
Mr. A: “Huh? Like what?”
Ms. B: “It was really a girl, wasn’t it?”
Mr. A: “I told you, no. He’s got a girlfriend at his part-time job, so they probably went there on a date.”
Ms. B: “Why’d you say it like that? You are mad, aren’t you?”
Mr. A: “I told you, I’m not mad!”
Ms. B: “You are so mad! You wouldn’t keep lying otherwise. You’re not answering me. Are you that worked up right now? And just who is this friend of yours?”
Mr. A: “Is it the amusement park that’s the problem? Should I pick another kind of place?”
Ms. B: “Why are you being like this? I said I don’t care! This is crazy!”
Mr. A: “But...”
Ms. B: “See, you’re lying. You went to AmaBri with that girl, didn’t you?”
Mr. A: “It was a guy. You’re not giving me much to work with here...”
Ms. B: “I’m not, huh? You don’t like being with me. Is that it, A?”
Mr. A: “That’s not true. I like being with you.”
Ms. B: “Why can’t you just be honest? I hate this.”
Mr. A: “Look, I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m sorry, but... I am.”
Ms. B: “Why are you apologizing? Did you do something you feel guilty about?”
Mr. A: “Um, er... that’s not what I...”
[Argument continues on endless loop]
Case C
Chiba Family, living in Amagi City, Tokyo
Mrs. Chiba, Housewife (38)
Son Chiba, Elementary School Student (7)
[Night, before bed]
Son Chiba: “Mommy... I wanna go to AmaBri! I wanna go to AmaBri!”
Mrs. Chiba: “Oh, you silly. You just went there last week. But I suppose you are at that amusement park age... hee hee...”
Son Chiba: “But I wanna go! AmaBri’s full of parents on the brink of divorce and college couples on the rocks!”
Mrs. Chiba: “Oh, listen to you! I always tell you, when you see people like that, you should always look the other way!”
Son Chiba: “But I like to bear witness to the darkness within others! Does that make me weird?”
Mrs. Chiba: “Of course not, dear! With your daddy working halfway across the country, my super sexy body is going to waste. You know that Tiramii-san asks me to rub his tummy? Oh, yes... I certainly understand how you feel!”
Son Chiba: “Mommy! I’m so happy!”
Mrs. Chiba: “My son! My son! Yes, let’s go! AmaBri really is that kind of place... It’s not for normal kinds of fun!”
Son Chiba: “Yeah. So let’s go to AmaBri! For the fun you find under the surface.”
Mrs. Chiba: “Yes, let’s go to AmaBri! For the fun you find under the surface.”
[They go harmoniously the next day.]
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