Chapter 2
Assuming the Role of a Side Character at School!
I turned fifteen and started attending the Midgar Academy for Dark Knights at the royal capital. This academy is known as the crème de la crème of schools on our continent and where promising knights gather not only from this nation but all over the world. I kept my grades on the meh tier to blend in with the crowd and my eye on the protagonists of my dreams.
One of them is Princess Alexia Midgar, the biggest fish of them all.
Honestly, even a chimpanzee would know she’s on the top tier.
I’ve heard there’s an ultra-famous super–big shot named Princess Iris Midgar, but she already graduated, to my chagrin.
Anyway, I’ll have you know that I unlocked a special event with Princess Alexia…er, I mean, my punishment for losing a game. Yeah, you’ve heard that right. I’m about to take part in your ye old punishment of confessing to a girl.
Which brings us to the rooftop of the school. I face Princess Alexia from a distance.
Her platinum hair is cut straight across at her shoulders, and her red eyes are almond-shaped and, um, pretty? And she looks all aloof with her perfect face. It’s like Yeah, yeah, we get it already. She’s gorgeous. Yeah, whatever.
I hate to break it to you, but I’m bored of beautiful women, thanks to Alpha and company. I prefer a touch of ugliness. It makes you unique, you know.
Anyway, I’m not the only reckless challenger who’s gone after Alexia. It’s been two months since the beginning of school, and more than a hundred schmucks have already tried to win her over.
And all of them were met with one bitter phrase: “I’m not interested.”
I mean, I get it. I’m guessing she’s got a political marriage or something lined up for her when she graduates. I bet she’s trying to say she doesn’t have time to engage in child’s play.
That said, the aristocratic students in love with her share the same fate—political marriage and all. But I think that’s why they want to have a little fun while they’re still in school.
Well, it doesn’t matter either way. In the end, it’s nothing but the amusement of those who know nothing of the shadow realm.
And it’s my duty as a background character to join in on this charade. To get brutally rejected by the most popular girl in school? I can’t think of a role more fitting for an extra. If I can get through this event and play the role of a real loser, I will become my ideal and take another step toward becoming a hidden mastermind.
I stay up all night to prepare for this moment. What should I say? How should I confess to her…? This is gonna be the greatest confession by a minor character of all time.
Choosing the right words is a given. But I take it a step further by experimenting with articulation, pitch, and vibrato. I finally master the ultimate confession.
On this day, at this very moment, I’m standing on the battlefield of a lifetime.
Ready, fight.
It’s a momentous battle for a background character.
Sure, shadowbrokers have their own way of combat, but fighting as a side character creates a breed of its own.
Which means I’m gonna pull out all the stops as one.
I’m secure in my decision when I turn toward her.
Princess Alexia… She’s standing there looking all high-and-mighty, but I could unsheathe my sword and detach her neck from her torso in a heartbeat. You’re a human like the rest of us.
Watch closely.
I present to you, the greatest confession in the world!
“Pwinshesh A-A-A…Alexia.”
Did you hear how I stuttered on the A-A-A? And that staccato? I threw in a bit of vibrato, changed pitch midway through, and added a lisp to Pwinshesh to give a convincing performance.
“I—I love you…!” I lower my eyes to evade her gaze, making sure my knees are knocking against each other. “W-will you be my girlfriend…?”
I choose to go with your average confession—cliché, if not boring. But I let my pitch and tone go hog wild. And that upward lilt at the end? It shows my complete lack of confidence.
It’s perfect…!
This is the performance of my dreams. I’m satisfied! I’m completely satisfied!
“Sure.”
“Huh?” I’m pleased with myself and just about to leave when I experience an auditory hallucination. “What did you just say?”
“I said…sure.”
“Um, okay.”
Something’s not right.
“L-let’s head back to campus together.”
From there, I walk Princess Alexia to her dorm room. After a “See you tomorrow” with a smile on my face, I head to my own room, bury my face in my pillow, and scream at the top of my lungs.
“When did I become the protagonist of a roooooooooooomcom!!”
“It’s weird, right?!”
“Bizarre.”
“Absolutely bonkers.”
It’s the next day. I’m having at lunch in the cafeteria and just told my two friends about yesterday. We’re all in agreement: There’s definitely something strange going on.
“No offense, but Princess Alexia is way out of your league. If she said yes to me? I’d still think it was fishy. Right?”
That’s Skel, the second son of the Baron Etal. He’s slim and tall, and though it seems he cares about his outer appearance, he has zero style. If you look at him from far away, he could trick you into thinking he’s hot. Erm, maybe not. I take that back.
Either way, Princess Alexia is way out of Skel Etal’s league, too. I know this for a fact, because I consider him my “minor character” friend.
“If Cid’s good enough for her, I bet I would’ve been good enough, too. Gah, I really should have confessed to her earlier.”
That’s Po, the second son of the Baron Tato. He’s short and somewhat stocky. You know how there’s one potato-esque guy on every baseball team? That’s basically him.
It doesn’t matter if you look at him from afar, from up close, or from any and all angles. With his looks, he could never scam anyone into thinking he’s cool. It goes without saying that he has absolutely no chance with Princess Alexia. After all, he’s your cold, hard background character.
Oh, and by the way, my name’s Cid. When I’m playing the part of Cid Kagenou, I’m also playing the part of your average Joe.
“To be honest, it’s terrible. I have a feeling she’s got an ulterior motive, which freaks me out. Plus, we basically live in two totally different worlds.”
“Yeah, I hear you. And unlike me, you’re not blessed in the looks department. I’d give it a week before she calls it quits.”
“Three days. Just look around you.”
I scan the cafeteria and see everyone whispering and observing me.
“Over there! That’s…”
“You’re kidding! He’s super average…”
“It must be some kind of mix-up…”
“Oh, I think he’s pretty cute…”
“No way!”
Et cetera.
“I heard he blackmailed her…according to Skel Etal.”
“I’ll kill that son of a bitch…”
“And make it look like an accident during practice…”
“If I don’t do it now, I’d bring shame to mankind…”
And the like.
I’ve got pretty good ears, and I’d caught almost all their chatter. I take a moment to glare at Skel.
“Hmm? What’s up?”
“Nothing.”
I guess friendships between minor characters can be fickle and fleeting.
“But seriously, what do I do? It’d be weird if I mentioned breaking up when I just confessed my love for her.”
And it would break character to dump a princess—though I guess people in this role wouldn’t date them in the first place.
“Come on, give it a try. If you’re lucky, you might make some nice memories,” Skel encourages with a sly grin.
“He’s right. Let’s say this is all a misunderstanding. You still get to date a princess. Don’t waste your time dealing with bullies,” Po adds.
“It doesn’t work that way.”
Even as we waste time now, rumors about me will continue to circulate around the school—meaning I’m getting pushed further and further away from my existence as an average nobody.
“But now that you two are actually going out,” Po muses, “you’ve gotta stay quiet about losing that game.”
“Yeah. I can see things getting messy if word got out. Please don’t say anything. I’m looking at you, Skel.”
“Me? I’d never say anything!”
“I’m serious.”
I sigh as I reach for my daily lunch for broke aristocrats—which costs exactly 980 zeni. I’m starting to get annoyed by the vibe of this place. I’m just going to eat as quickly as possible and skedaddle out of here.
Erm, well, that was the plan.
But a group of maids set the lunch course of the super-duper filthy rich—which costs a whopping ten thousand zeni—in the seat across from me with marked efficiency.
“Is this seat available?”
Enter Alexia. Ugh, I knew she was here. That’s why I was trying to scarf down my lunch.
“P-p-pwease do!”
“Y-y-you can sit here! It’s our pleasure!”
Skel and Po respond, basically shriveling into nothing. These are the same guys who were talking big game about how they could date her if they wanted to. Yep, just as expected of my friends.
“Yeah, sure. Go ahead,” I say to Princess Alexia, who’s waiting for my answer.
“I don’t mind if I do,” she replies, taking a seat.
“Nice weather we’re having.” It seems like an obvious way to fill the silence.
“Indeed.”
Our innocuous conversation continues, and with the elegant movement of her hand, she starts eating her extravagant lunch.
“There’s so much food in the super-duper filthy-rich lunch course.”
“Yeah. I can never finish it.”
“What a waste.”
“I would be fine buying a cheaper lunch, but if I don’t get the expensive one, the others might feel too shy to ask for it.”
“Uh-huh, I see. Can I eat your leftovers?”
“Yes, but…”
“Oh, don’t worry about being polite around me. I mean, this is the section for low-ranking aristocrats.”
Alexia looks baffled as I swipe the meat from her main dish and cram it into my mouth before she can get a word in edgewise.
Oh, it’s good.
“Um…”
“Pass the fish.”
“Wait…!”
Whoo-hoo, it’s my lucky day. Thanks to the princess, I get to fill my stomach, which is blissed the hell out. You might notice that my attitude toward her has changed from yesterday and that I’m acting super-casual around her.
And if you want to know why…
It’s ’cause I’m in the middle of Operation: Get Dumped ASAP!
“Sigh… Sure, whatever.”
“Thanks for the meal. See ya later.”
“Halt!”
Dammit. My plan to dine and dash fails, and I reluctantly slink back to my seat.
“I assume you’re taking Royal Bushin for your practical elective in the afternoon.”
“Yurp.”
The academy requires its students to take general courses in the morning and practical electives in the afternoon. The former takes place in set classrooms, but the latter is a mishmash of students from all classes and grades. We’re basically allowed to choose one of many weapon arts electives that we feel suits us best.
“I’m in that class, too. I thought it’d be nice to take it together.”
“Yeah, no. I mean, you’re in section one. I’m in section nine.”
Bushin arts is so popular that it has nine different sections, with fifty students in each, divided up by skill level. For now, I’m performing poorly enough to be in section nine, so I can scope things out. I plan to eventually settle for section five.
“No, it’s okay. With my recommendation, I got you into section one.”
“It’s totally not okay. I know that for a fact.”
“Would you rather that I enroll in section nine?”
“No, stop. That’d make me look bad.”
“It’s one or the other. Choose.”
“No.”
“This is a royal order.”
“I’m off to section one.”
With that, lunch is over. Skel and Po were completely still from start to finish, basically melting into the background.
“This place is huge…,” I marvel the moment I step into the classroom for section one. I can’t help myself.
To put it simply, it looks like a ginormous gymnasium. In addition to the standard locker room, it is fully equipped with a shower room, a café, and a maid who opens the entrance, which technically makes it a manually operated automatic door.
As for section nine, we meet outdoors—rain or shine, sleet or snow. There isn’t even a door for a maid to open, much less a maid.
To avoid getting bullied by the other students, I hastily change into my uniform and wait for Alexia in the corner for a while.
“Let’s loosen up,” she suggests as soon as she enters the room in her Bushin uniform.
Think plain cheongsam, one of those tight-fitting dresses you might see in a movie about the 1920s, with a high leg slit. That’s the uniform for girls. Hers is black, which indicates she’s one of the strongest fighters. In Bushin, each color represents a different level of strength: Black is at the top, and white is at the bottom.
I’m in white, obviously. And since I’m the only one in white in this entire room, I stick out like a sore thumb.
I ignore the stares of other students—70 percent hostile, 30 percent curious—and warm up with some light stretches.
“Interesting,” remarks Alexia, mirroring my movements.
In this world, it’s common knowledge that it’s beneficial to loosen your muscles before working out. But with no how-to guides on stretching, everyone does it in their own way. I mean, if you’re a die-hard for sports, you’ll hurt yourself if you don’t stretch properly. I’ve heard of others using magic to force their muscles to loosen up, but this still affects their performance.
Alexia is well versed in that sense, which is nice. I mean, I’m a high-maintenance purist when it comes to battle. Like, I won’t lose to the average pretentious snob.
We’re getting ready when class begins.
“Starting today, we have a new friend joining us,” our instructor starts, introducing me.
“I’m Cid Kagenou. It’s nice to meet you.”
There isn’t a hint of friendliness in my classmates’ eyes.
Ah, section one. A quick glance around, and I can already spot some VIPs. That hot guy over there is the second son of a duke, and that beauty is the daughter of the current leader of the Dark Knights. Then there’s our teacher, who’s the fencing instructor for the country. And on top of that, he’s a young blond hunk who’s only twenty-eight years old.
“Let’s welcome him to our class.”
With that, we start training, suppressing our magic through meditation first before practicing our swings and going over the basics of swordplay.
Nice, nice. I’m all for reviewing the basics. They’re important to know. In section nine, we’d wave our swords for a few seconds and play-fight the whole time. It’s nice to see the strongest fighters value their fundamentals. Plus, all the students are skilled. I can say it’s a neat environment—and I’m not trying to suck up or anything.
And most importantly, the techniques taught in this class are hyper-logical. It feels great to take part in training that doesn’t leave me bored out of my mind.
“Do ya like the Royal Bushin method?” Our hunky blond instructor approaches me.
I think his name is Zenon Griffey.
“Does it seem that way?”
“Yeah, you look like you’re enjoying yourself.”
“I guess I am.”
Mr. Zenon grins in an easy-breezy type of way. “As you know, the Royal Bushin method is a relatively new fighting style, a deviation from traditional Bushin. There was some resistance at first between the traditional supporters and the trailblazers. But thanks to Princess Iris, it’s now being recognized as the artistic heir of its traditional counterpart.”
“And I hear you’re one of the swordsmen who’s spread the art throughout the country, Mr. Zenon.”
“Yeah, but my contributions are nothing compared to Princess Iris’s. In any case, the Royal Bushin method practically raised me, which is why it makes me happy to see others enjoying it, too. Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt you.”
With that, Mr. Zenon goes to check in on the other students. I totally understand his feelings. I mean, I get all giddy when Alpha and the other girls watch me show off my swordplay. I’ve developed these techniques on my own, which makes me all the more excited when others take them on, too.
“What did you two talk about?” Alexia asks.
“The Royal Bushin method.”
“Hmm. We’re going to spar next. Let’s pair up.”
Sparring is basically a form of light training where we review techniques, reversals, and battle processes without actually hitting our opponent.
“Aren’t you too strong for me?”
“It’ll be fine.”
We pick up our wooden swords and start exchanging blows.
I swing, and she blocks.
She strikes, and I guard.
We don’t hit each other, moving at a sluggish pace, and skimp on magical energy. All around us, the other pairs are locked head-to-head in all-out fights, blasting each other with spells. But to my surprise, Alexia is matching my pace.
No. That’s not it… This is normal for her. After all, the purpose of this activity is to review our strategies, meaning that speed and power are pointless. Alexia is focused on this goal—and that alone. I can tell by the way she handles her sword.
This entire country sings the praises of Princess Iris, Alexia’s older sister—brilliant and fiendish, the strongest combatant in the kingdom. On the other hand, they don’t have much to say about Alexia. She possesses magic and forthright techniques, but she’s inferior to her sister. That’s what people generally say when talking about Alexia.
But as I spar with her, I think she’s good. She adheres to the basics and grasps the foundations of combat, though it feels uninspired.
Yeah, it’s run-of-the-mill. But that’s the fruit of her labor: Her swordplay is polished, refined, and devoid of all excess. That’s the proof that she’s mastered the basics step-by-step.
Delta, you could learn a thing or two from her, I think, engaging in a fake conversation with a certain hybrid beast—one whose swordsmanship I find hard to forgive.
“Your swordplay isn’t bad,” Alexia notes.
“Thanks.”
“But I don’t like it.”
She likes lifting me up to bring me down.
“It’s like I’m watching myself fight. Let’s stop here for today.”
She begins packing up, leaving it at that. Class is over.
Never in my wildest dreams did I expect to get through this elective without a hitch. If I can just get my stuff together, change, and book it to my dorm room, I might be able to…
“Hold it.”
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