Monogatari Series - Volume 22 - Chapter 1.02

002

“Araragi-kun, why’d you decide to become a police officer?”

As a high schooler, due to having ridden around everywhere on my bicycle, I had believed that my area of activities had been rather expansive, and I had been under the impression that there were no unknown places or secret roads that I wasn’t aware of in the compact little town I lived in. But coming home after four years made me realize that this was just an arrogant misunderstanding of mine.

For example, I hadn’t known that the high school that I had attended back then, Naoetsu High, had had such a large river flowing right in front of it.

A large river, or perhaps a daring river.

The river had the kind of intensity that you could go rafting in—even if you weren’t someone with a transformative condition like Suou-san, I doubt you would want to casually dip your feet in a current like this.

“Oops. Please excuse me. Assistant Inspector Araragi, for what reason did you decide to become a police officer?” said Suou-san, correcting herself in a playful manner.

Assistant Inspector Araragi.

I felt like I was unable to respond to that title—which I was sure I would never get used to—and like I was unable to respond to that uncomfortable question.

Thinking about how many times I would be asked that question again and again—goodness gracious, I was already feeling tired even though it was only the first time. Although it was a little weird. Despite having gone into minute detail about the vampire that lived in my shadow, I hadn’t said anything about why I chose to work at this job.

“Because my parents were police officers—I suppose. Both of them were.”

“I see, I see. Does that mean that you felt like you wouldn’t be able to become more than your parents if you didn’t become a police officer? Or does it mean that you got to this position using the connections of your parents?”

She was using a teasing tone of voice, and in fact she probably was just straight up teasing me. But as I was the subject of the topic, I couldn’t help but think about what she was asking.

I didn’t think I had any of the admirable feelings of the former, but I didn’t think I had any of the selfish feelings of the latter, either.

It wasn’t like I did this out of some strong ambition, but it wasn’t like this was calculated, either… That was just the kind of person I was.

“A long time ago, I met this con man that really pissed me off. I was pretty badly deceived by him, actually. So my dream is to arrest him. It’s my heart’s desire. So that’s why I’m a police officer.”

After some hesitation, I finally responded with that.

This, at least, wasn’t a lie.

Although you could say it was only just “not a lie”.

“Hmm. A con man, huh? So you want to go after white-collar crime—you sound like such a career man. Then, since you were assigned to something like the Rumors Squad, does it feel like it’s not really meeting your expectations, Araragi-kun? Well, it’s just four more months of enduring this, so let’s do our best!”

“I’ve never thought poorly of this squad. Although I do admit that it was unexpected. That a public institution had a squad like this.”

“Right, well, this is just a test run, after all. It’s just one of Gaen-san’s many plans—whether or not it’s up to Assistant Inspector Araragi’s expectations.”

“Like I said, I don’t think that.”

“I’m counting on you for a lot, though. Seriously, even if you’re just a career man here for training, we’ve finally gotten a male coworker in this squad.”

It was hard to tell how serious she actually was. But Suou-san, who didn’t mix well with water, was at least twice the distance from the river as I was, showing that she didn’t want to be hit by a single drop of the water spray. Despite her usual cool demeanor, it was clear she was taking considerable precaution when it came to riverbanks.

At the very least, for this matter in particular, it wasn’t a mistake to rely on a newcomer like me for help… The Rumors Squad chief sure had a nasty personality for dispatching someone who wasn’t good with water to the waterfront.

Though they were a trusted friend of Gaen-san.

“I guess it’s more likely for girls to be into romantic stuff like the occult and the spiritual, since the squad ended up being a bunch of girls. Being biased isn’t a good thing, you know. So don’t hold back, Araragi-kun, and enjoy this harem situation to your heart’s content.”

“Please. I’ve left all that behind in my high school days.”

“Um. What kind of life did you lead in high school?”

She snickered, and then continued.

“I don’t know Gaen-san personally, but I do owe her a lot. So I’d like to produce results that can meet up to that—and your life may have been smooth sailing up until now, Assistant Inspector Araragi, and you may not want to do so, but while you’re with us, try to cooperate, okay? Think of it as a form of community service.”

Community service, huh. Though I wasn’t the type to have any sort of affection for my community.

Besides, I couldn’t call my life smooth sailing.

Not in the slightest.

For an uncomfortable-sounding title like Assistant Inspector, any idiot could pass the civil service exam and start as one. For that much, you didn’t even need connections from your parents.

And it wasn’t like I’d been living apart from oddity phenomena for the past four years—even if I was apart from my hometown, my shadow stayed perfectly attached to me, and that shadow was one that pulled an oddity along with it.

Something that I had always done had simply become a job. And it wasn’t even a hobby that had turned into a job, but my lifestyle.

The Naoetsu Police Department, Rumors Squad?

That was just Gaen-san setting up something like this in the town I lived in.

Since that woman knew everything, I couldn’t help but suspect that she decided to use the Naoetsu Police Department as a model, already having foreseen that I would become a police officer in the future.

Okay.

So it was like having your oddities locally sourced.

As a 23-year-old adult, I’ll do my best and work myself to the bone.

If anything, working myself to the bone was one of my strong points. In the literal sense.

“Anyway, Suou-san. What kind of rumor was it again? What sort of circumstances does this river have? I ended up being paired with you without getting all the details… and the chief just told me to ask you.”

“You can be more casual with me, you know? I’m not that much older than you, plus your rank is higher. You’re an assistant inspector, and I’m an officer.”

“I’m not very good at being casual. I had a good upbringing.”

“Don’t make me laugh.”

She shrugged.

“Well, this river was a place you could swim in—and in the summer, families would have barbecues, and kids would use it as some kind of playground, and so on,” Suou-san continued. “But I guess since this is your hometown, there’s no need to explain that much, right?”

“No, I’d like you to explain that much as well.”

In the first place, I hadn’t even known that this river existed until recently.

Unfortunately, as I had had a good upbringing, I spent my childhood without a family to take me to barbecues or friends to play with.

I had wondered where everyone in my class would go off to after leaving me behind, but I see now! They would go to places like this.

Although it’s not something I could do anything about, knowing that as an adult.

“There weren’t any major problems that occurred until now, but this summer, there were a series of accidents—five children that drowned here.”

“……”

“At least, five that we know of. There could be more. Nobody has died yet, from what we know.”

But—being biased wasn’t a good thing.

Hearing those words, I turned to look at the river again—the boisterously flowing river wasn’t necessarily on the level of rapids, but I probably couldn’t guarantee absolute safety in it.

While Suou-san had called it “some kind of playground”, looking at it now, it looked absolutely too dangerous for kids to play in.

I wonder.

Could this just be the “viewpoint of an adult”?

Had I just become a boring adult, being overbearing and restricting kids from their fun?

“Whether that’s being overbearing or not, we’ve been starting to hear things along those lines—like, people asking if we should bar entry from the riverbank or have schools warn children not to come close.”

“Like how playground equipment has been gradually disappearing from parks?”

“I’m not completely against that happening, though. It’s a risk to keep equipment that’s slowly deteriorating, and wanting to keep it is just for the nostalgia of older people.”

It was an opinion that was more mature than I’d expect from a twenty-six-year-old.

It could be due to the mermaid flesh she ate—ten years in her life could very well be the same as eight hundred years normally.

“Although it’s more that older people rarely change their opinions. It’s like how cars made when traffic laws were more lenient didn’t have any seatbelts. And you could still go on highways.”

I didn’t really get that comparison.

She was probably enjoying the generation gap with how her metaphors didn’t make sense to her junior.

“Well, regardless of general opinion. In the case of this river, if someone had died, there would absolutely have been restrictions imposed on it—so it’s a good thing that the season ended before that could happen.”

“Did they just set aside the problem for now?”

“I suppose it would be more like deferring it. Even though no deaths have occurred, five is still a considerable number. It weighs pretty heavily on me. And one is still in critical condition, not having regained consciousness yet—and even among the other four, we’ve had broken bones and the like, so the situation is tense.”

Although they could recover if they ate my flesh—she said, without missing a beat.

If that was the case, then even the unconscious child would make a complete recovery if I had them drink my blood—but that couldn’t happen.

I couldn’t allow it to happen.

Both Suou-san and I knew very well what kind of tragedy would be born from such a rash action.

Neither of us wanted to make anyone else go through these terrible conditions that were worse than dying.

“Anyway, it’s Town Hall’s job to decide whether or not to put a fence around the riverbank, not ours—our job is to manage the rumors, after all.”

To manage the rumors.

The phrase didn’t exactly roll off the tongue, but that was indeed the role of the Rumors Squad.

And it was indeed my job.

Urban legends. Idle rumors. Street gossip.

And—rumors.

“Out of the five children that drowned, we have testimony from three of them. According to them, they didn’t just drown—their ankles were grabbed by some ‘invisible hand’ and pulled to the bottom of the water.”

“……”

Three out of five.

Excluding the child that was still unconscious, it was really three out of four.

Just going by the numbers made the credibility of this testimony extremely high.

In other words, an extremely credible rumor.

“…I wonder if there’s a kappa in this river.”

“Who knows? Maybe it’s a mermaid,” said Suou-san in response to my attempt at poking fun at the situation.

Her expression was stony, making me wonder if it was even a joke.

The atmosphere felt rather hard-boiled.

“At the very least, it doesn’t seem like any of the children had their shirikodama removed. But there’s no mistake that the number of drowning accidents has suddenly increased—making this the perfect breeding grounds for a ghost story.”

So we need to smash it up before that happens—said Suou-san disinterestedly, with a dry voice that belied her violent statement.

The words of a mermaid who had to stay dry to survive.

“…Suou-san. Why did you decide to become a police officer?” I asked. Not simply to make conversation or as revenge for earlier, but because I had suddenly become curious.

Like me, she suffered from the aftereffects of an oddity story, with many physical restrictions applied to her, but that didn’t mean she had to become a police officer—and she could very well have gone on avoiding waterfronts if she hadn’t become one.

“Araragi-kun, do you like pro baseball? I really like it, you see.”

“Eh?”

“I like it so much I even watch minor league games.”

“You like it that much…”

As I responded as such, and as I marveled at this unexpected hobby of hers, I thought she was just cleverly trying to change the topic, but I was wrong.

Suou-san continued.

“But it really hurts to watch player drafts. Even though there are these players that are so good, almost monsters, at baseball, they don’t even get to choose the team they play for—so I always think about what it means to be able to choose your occupation.”

Hmm.

Strictly speaking, some players did have the right to veto, but I knew that what she was getting at probably wasn’t as simple as that—even I, when I became a police officer, had tried to explore other avenues at one point, before having to face reality in the end.

Reality. The grim reality.

It created a wall tougher than having to face oddities.

“People will only become what they’re able to become. Whether that’s police officers, or mermaids.”

Or vampires, said Suou-san, looking at my shadow.