Monogatari Series - Volume 12 - Chapter 1.08

008

“Well, I can’t help the lack of excitement in my voice because I already know the ending to this tale, which is to say, ’tis already evident to me that it will come to an awful conclusion, but while I call it a worthless tale, ’tis by no means an entirely unpleasant memory, a flashback I wish to recall none of.

“As ye can see, I’ve a careless personality.

“Careless, or perhaps perfunctory, or perhaps improvisatory, but in any case, I’ve lived my life from moment to moment not thinking about matters too deeply.

“That must be why I’ve lived notably long for a vampire─because I’ve lived it as hedonistically as I could, never giving too much thought to anything.

“Which is why I do have my reasonably pleasant memories as well─of what happened in that village.

“I’ve forgotten its name, though.

“Nay, this isn’t something I’ve forgotten, I never made the effort to remember it to begin with─as thou art well aware, I once had close to no interest in human society as a vampire─all of it looked identical to me, and I made no effort to distinguish any of it from the rest.

“I could barely distinguish one race from another.

“What are the humans in this country, they’re all so tiny in size─that was about the only thought I had. A well-grown boy is no uncommon sight now, but four hundred years ago, every one of thee was about thy height.

“Hmph.

“But well, I am the tiny one now. One never knows what the world may bring─in any case, I apologize for making the story complicated, but the names of villages and humans and all those other kinds of proper nouns won’t be accurate going forward.

“In fact, I shan’t even try.

“As my senses direct me.

“They won’t even be guesses─’twould not necessarily be incorrect to call them nonsense. For about the only distinctions I was making were ‘village,’ ‘man,’ ‘woman,’ and ‘child.’

“I may have even mixed those.

“All in a messy tangle.

“I presume the lake whose disappearance I caused had some sort of name as well, but ’tis not one I remember…though ’twas a rather large pond.

“Now that I think of it, I recall that annoying Hawaiian-shirted boy speaking of legends stating that your Lake Biwa was made by the footprint of an inhuman existence, but the opposite would hold true in my case─for my footprints caused the lake to vanish.

“That said, ’tis not as though I did it without any tricks.

“Or perhaps not tricks, but there are always what thou might call advantageous conditions on my side whenever I perform any such large-scale acts─it seems the lake lacked much of its water in those days.

“Aye, from a drought.

“’Twas an age with no dams or the like, so the damage dealt by global warming…or rather, long droughts was quite serious.

“To the point where it truly was a matter of life and death.

“It may be hard for one such as thee who lives in a blessed age to understand…but this was a time when the very concept of infrastructure did not exist─but while it may nearly sound as though I feel sorry for the humans back then, I of course had no such conception at the time.

“While I say that aberrations cannot exist without humans, that aberrations only come into being as such when they are first witnessed by humans, all of that is but theory speaking─to go further, ’tis naught more than an empty idea.

“Why would I ever give my thanks or show my gratitude─in fact, I cackled and joked that if the sun’s rays were causing them to grow weak and die, then why, ’twas nearly as though they were vampires.

“’Twas dark comedy, of course.

“But─by chance I had saved those helpless humans. How, ye ask? I thought I’d explained that already…

“I said I’d made the lake disappear, did I not?

“But ’tis not as if I’m an explosive.

“And I spoke of how I have no body temperature─I would not say I have none whatsoever, due to my remarkable regenerative abilities, but let us put that aside.

“This is to say that no matter the speed, Mach whatever, at which I landed, I may have made the lake run dry, but ’tis not as though its water would vanish.

“’Twould not evaporate, ye see.

“True, the high speeds may have heated me to some degree, but I regenerate from even such hot temperatures back to a regular one─when I land, whether on water or land, my body temperature must be quite pedestrian. Let us ignore the un-pedestrian notion of landing there from the South Pole in the first place.

“And with that ignored─what dost thou think would happen then? Think of it as a stone having dropped into a deep puddle from directly above─nay, there’s no need to give it any special thought, just think about it normally.

“Aye, the water would splash up.

“Nearly all the water in the lake.

“While I may have been able to negate my heat, I could not go so far as to negate my kinetic energy─now, as for what happened to the water that flew into the air, that too was something utterly regular. After dancing in the sky for a moment, it followed the law of gravity and fell back down to the ground.

“As ‘rain.’

“Nay, the word will suffice─if water comes down from the sky, ’tis rain. Dost thou expect me to be able to speak on the mechanisms of weather phenomena, anyway? ’Tis not as though I know everything merely because I’ve lived for a long time. Expect not the wisdom of the wizened from me, I told thee I’ve lived my life in the moment.

“In any case, I ‘made it rain.’

“And here’s the funny part─in those days, to do so was nearly the most virtuous act any being could perform.

“Thou must be thinking, what’s so impressive about making it rain, or at least thou must not understand why doing so was such a virtuous act. So I shall be kind and rephrase what I did in a single word. Aye, ’twas a ‘miracle.’

“The age was one where men staked their lives on praying for rain─they did not need me to split the land in two, for a long drought was damaging enough to do just that on its own.

“I do think that the sun has mellowed since those days─though it depends from place to place. In any case, I want thee to understand the era’s historical background.

“And it was in this time and these conditions of this land─that I made it rain.

“’Twas only as a result─but I saved not just many lives but entire hamlets all around the lake, far and wide.

“I mean not to boast, I have no interest in bragging. ’Twas not my intention, after all. I do not consider saving a human life as any great deed, either─and one false step would have turned the miracle into a disaster.

“Had I landed in a place away from the lake, the center of a village, for example, I may have kicked up not the water of a lake but the drought-cracked land itself. While I would not go so far as to say that I’d have flipped these islands upside down, a number of towns would have met such a fate─a disaster.

“That is in part why I aimed for the sea when I leapt…while ’tis true that I generally have no interest whatsoever in human culture or life, ’tis not as if I’d take pleasure in massacring them on a large scale. Of course I’d want to avoid doing so if I could.

“But if I couldn’t, I wouldn’t.

“I am an aberration, after all. And a vampire.

“One of a degenerate tribe where suicide and the slaying of kin are chronic issues─humans had different ethics in those days compared to now, and I would say that perhaps mine are different as well. Maintaining the same character for four hundred years is an impossible task─especially in my case, I can now show some bit of understanding when it comes to humans by way of the strong influence ye’ve had on me, but in those days?

“I’m sure this is rather unpleasant for thee to hear, a modern man and one closer to the human side, but ’tis the truth. What I’m trying to say is that I did not upend the water in the lake to become any savior of the villages around it.

“Allow me to state that much.

“There would be no point at all in telling the legend of a savior rather than of a vampire. And anyway, while I said I’d prefer to avoid mass death if possible, I failed to do just that in reality.

“The lake only happened to be there.

“And, in a stroke of bad timing, I was witnessed when it happened to happen─nay, perhaps I ought to call it good timing?

“I mean, I’d executed that super jump instant air dash from the South Pole in search of ‘witnesses’ of the aberration that is myself.

“In fact, this prompt witnessing would be a resounding success. I ought to give a hip-hip-hooray for having been witnessed─and of all the times, in the instant I caused that ‘miracle.’

“Nay, I suppose it really was poor timing when I think of what came after… The worst timing.

“By the by.

“Dost thou know what ye humans call one who performed a miracle?

“What one, whether aberration or human, is called upon performing a miracle─thou must have an idea.

“Aye.

“The performer of a miracle is called ‘god.’

“To be more precise─the performer, whether aberration or human, is made into a god.”