Lady Rose Wants to be a Commoner - Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Lady Rose Wants to be a Commoner – Chapter 18

I woke up from my nightmare with a start, and began to recall vague memories of my past life . I feared that my condition was getting worse, even more so than yesterday .

Well, when I tried to recall the nightmare, I could remember that the world I was currently in was unnatural . Although I felt that the Ore-sama Prince resembled my older brother, I didn’t wish to remember too much about him . I was aware that I had died in my previous life, so I should have forgotten about it completely . I was driven out before I could learn why my wish to become a commoner had been considered a threat .

I couldn’t take a break from my job, even though I wasn’t in the best condition . After all, I was neither sick nor injured . Rather, it was merely a problem of the heart .

In this world, it was very difficult for commoners to be re-employed . If you made a blunder and were fired, then it would be impossible for you to find a job in the same town . Even if you explain that it was due to an illness, others would think that you had a weak constitution .

In addition, when your job was far away and you had limited means of transportation, you could only work for a short amount of time… Was it even possible for a commoner without any achievements or recommendations to work for so little time and be able to earn enough to survive? Hence, I rejected that idea . Even if I could abandon my own home, there was no way I could save up enough money in two months to rent a new one . I wasn’t foolishly optimistic enough to think that I would be able to get a good place to live and a job, nor did I feel like doing so .

In the first place, there were no telephones . In order to contact your employers about your absence, you would have to go directly to your workplace .

Commoners would put on rouge that they occasionally used to hide their pallid faces and leave the house as if they were fine .

The town was as harmonious as always, which made me wonder why I was worrying about it so much .

Even though I had died, I couldn’t detach myself enough to call it the end, and I was overwhelmed when I recalled the past that I could not move on from . I was quite optimistic in my dreams, though .

…I decided that I would like to find another dream after things settled down, something other than becoming a commoner .

“Good morning!”

I greeted Michelle-san with a smile as I arrived at the store . It was easy for me to hide the fact that I was feeling sick, since acting was part of my daily life .

Well, that was how it should have been, but for some reason, after looking at me, Michelle-san’s smiling face warped into worry .

“Fii-chan, aren’t you feeling sick…?”

I was at a loss as Michelle-san, who looked worried, approached me and asked if I was alright while looking at my face .

I couldn’t even feign ignorance . After all, I had believed that I could deceive her .

How was I exposed? I even knew where to put a bit of red on to make my complexion appear natural . I also didn’t think that there were any problems with my voice and facial expression .

“Certainly, it would help me a lot if Fii-chan is here, but I wish for you to work here happily and energetically . It is great that you are enthusiastic about working, but you should take your time and rest until you get better . Alright?”

Convinced, Michelle-san forcibly sent me home .

I turned around and desperately grasped her arm . With teary eyes, I looked into Michelle-san’s eyes as I asked .

“…how did you notice?”

I had to make sure . If I was deficient in any way, I had to hurry up and fix it .

She looked at me with an odd expression then answered as if it were obvious

“Of course I’d know if a girl who is like a daughter to me is feeling sick . Come on, head home, warm up, and sleep . ”

I didn’t immediately follow Michelle-san’s words, and I absentmindedly stood outside of the shop for a while, having been forcibly kicked out .

After some time, I eventually staggered home .

I wasn’t very sure, but it seemed like I was supposed to head home . I didn’t understand what Michelle-san was talking about, though .

My head wasn’t working properly . It was certain that today was not going to be a good day . Tomorrow . I will try harder tomorrow . I am too weak today .

When I got close to my home, as I walked forward on the slanting path, I saw a carriage riding by, even though it was rare to see any in this remote part of the city in the morning . As I continued to stare, I realized that the carriage looked familiar and stopped walking .

As expected, the carriage stopped right next to me .

I narrowed my eyes as the man got off, his silver hair sparkling under the sunlight .

“…You look sick . ”

Although two weeks had passed, instead of greeting me, he faced me and told me this . Before I had realized it, I had taken a step back, as if to run away .

I was convinced that Nika-sama had come here as an inspector, but I was relieved that his purpose was clear . Why had I performed such a suspicious move? I couldn’t afford to do this .

But, I mean… even Nika-sama noticed .

My thoughts were in disorder .

“I’ll send you home . The carriage… oh, right… you didn’t want to ride in the carriage . Lend me your hand . ”

Had I ever said that I didn’t want to ride in the carriage? There was an accidental kissing scene with Nika-sama in the carriage, but… hadn’t I managed to avoid that before…?

As I wondered about this, Nika-sama grabbed my hand with a gentle firmness, as if to lessen my burden, and pulled me along as he walked ahead .

Despite being an honest gentleman, to think that Nika-sama, who was worried about my poor condition, would hold a lady’s hand… Well, I probably didn’t count as a female . Even though my engagement with the Ore-sama Prince was cancelled, it wasn’t possible that a flag would pop up, since I was an inspection target .

For a while, we walked in silence .

Nika-sama probably didn’t talk to me so that I wouldn’t have to speak . All I felt like doing was watch his silver hair as it shimmered under the sun .

If he started speaking to me, that self-satisfaction would end .

When we arrived at my home, the nausea was almost gone .

After making sure that I was lying on my futon (Japanese Mattress), Nika-sama, being the gentleman that he was, quickly turned to head home .

I suddenly grabbed hold of the cuffs of Nika-sama’s pants, but I quickly released it after realizing what I had done .

Since it was only for a moment, he might not have noticed . Please don’t notice it…! Unfortunately, this wish of mine was not answered as Nika-sama turned around with widened eyes . It was very obvious that he had noticed . His eyes wandered a bit before he crouched down next to me .

Silence .

Well, even if I said that, I should have been the one who had something to say .

Even though I had kept my distance this whole day, my action just now was too strange . I had to explain .

I knew why, so… I should… explain .

I opened my heavy mouth .

“I… was always jealous of Seth-sama . ”

“…Seth?”

Nika-sama raised an eyebrow . Well, that was to be expected . Anyone would wonder why I was bringing up the Ore-sama Prince right now .

“He had a wonderful and kind elder brother, who neither bullied nor looked down on him . I was… jealous of Seth-sama, who thought of this as something that was natural . ”

Even though the memories of my past life were faint, I was now convinced that I had unconsciously felt jealous .

I didn’t know how much I had wished for such a brother, but it was difficult when they showed it off like it was something normal . I didn’t think much of it when I was playing the game, but this was now reality . I could see the bond and love between the siblings .

Nika-sama was, of course, better than my brother . I had desired a brotherly figure, but it was disgusting that I had not stopped wishing for a man to have the same temperament as my older brother .

“I also wanted…”

It was a stupid wish . Brothers were not something you could choose . That was obvious . This was meaningless nonsense .

I had to accept that and improve how I was now . In order to do that, I had wanted to get over my trauma and defeat fate . I hadn’t just decided to become a commoner . Even though I couldn’t remember when it started, I was fixated on becoming a commoner .

If I allowed myself to be spoiled by someone else’s brother and pretended that he was mine, I wouldn’t change .

“It’s alright even if we aren’t blood related . I, too… have thought of Fii as my sister . Is that no good?”

I smiled at Nika-sama, who spoiled me with the words that I had wanted to hear .

…I liked this person . Putting aside the fact that he was my ideal brother figure, Nika-sama was always kind and had always looked out for me .


That was why…

“That’s no good . No, Nika-sama is Nika-sama, and my brother is… uhmm… no . ”

I had only one brother, who had traumatized me too much… and now, I was trying my best to erase the traces of his existence .

Nika-sama was not my elder brother . One was already enough .

“Fii… do you believe that fate can be changed?”

The topic suddenly changed . Nika-sama looked down at me as if he were lost . No, it was probably just me, who thought that the had topic changed . Perhaps, there was some connection that Nika-sama had seen .

If it were a normal day, I would say, “Were you influenced by some sort of religion?” or “Is that some sort of smug pick-up line?” and joke around politely to give a safe answer .

Right now, however, while feeling sick and seeing Nika-sama, who was looking at me with a serious expression, my mouth opened unconsciously .

“It can be changed . ”

I couldn’t stand the fact that I couldn’t win against it . I didn’t want to give in, to obey, to live a life full of regrets and tears, and then die .

I disliked the word “fate,” but because I brought that hate with me, I wanted to change it .

I wanted to change the story, the scenario, and the fate of Kyuukoku no Lady Rose .

“…I see . That’s very like you, huh . ”

Nika-sama smiled as if the dark clouds in his heart had been blown away . Although I didn’t really understand, I smiled back .

Just today . I will be weak just for today .

I gripped Nika-sama’s hand and closed my eyes . It seemed like I wouldn’t be having a bad dream today .

Let’s do our best again tomorrow .