A DEITY’S STRANGE REQUEST
Suddenly, I was in an odd space with magic circles floating all around me.
I recognized this sight.
Azusa, We are speaking directly into your mind.
Nintan stood right before me.
She was an eminent goddess in this world, one I had ended up fighting in the past. Last time, she said I didn’t have to address her formally, so I planned to take her up on the offer. But I still end up being deferential when I talk to her. She is way, way, way more important than I am…
“Uh, there’s, like, subtitles here…”
Indeed, the words Azusa, We are speaking directly into your mind sat in front of Nintan. She could just speak normally to me.
This is inside your mind. You have not come to Our world, so you cannot heed Our voice directly. The voice of a god is not a sound to be heard so easily.
“I’m not sure I’m following all this, but something is going on, right?”
Maybe it was a problem unique to deities.
Yes. And to make this easy for you to comprehend, We are utilizing a script from your previous life. We can use all languages.
Oh yeah, they were like Japanese subtitles in a movie. Literally in Japanese, and not in any language of this world. I could read it either way, so I didn’t even notice at first.
We can even use other accents, yeah, mate.
Where the heck was that supposed to be from?
So We have a request to ask of you, and thus, We are calling to you like this.
Eep… This is going nowhere good…
“I’m sorry, I don’t know if I can listen to the request of a god. Don’t you think it’s a bit much to ask?”
All your dreams starting tomorrow will be about you turning into a frog.
For a god, her methods were awfully insidious.
To be honest, We are losing the ability to control Our power, and it has become a cause for worry.
Now that was a god problem. I can’t control my power! was such an edgelord thing to say. Well, to express via subtitle, if you want to get technical.
Our temple is surrounded by a manmade pond. You have come to Our temple, so you know this. This pond is meant to venerate Us.
Well, that was a sudden topic change. What do ponds have to do with power?
Strangely enough, the pond has become infested with power… Even Our believers are starting to get frightened…
How does power infest a pond? Is that like how magic naturally gathers in divine spaces or something?
Among Our believers are those who think this is Our wrath. We have sent oracles saying they have misunderstood, yet they do not accept them… But even believers with deep faith are staying away from the temple. One day, people will no longer come, all because of power… How dreadful power can be…
Power is dreadful…? Maybe she’s talking in subtitles because this is too embarrassing to say aloud.
You are likely thinking We should erase everything, power and all. However, though We are a god— No, because We are a god, erasing a part of creation isn’t something to be done lightly.
Is power something you “create”? I guess it has to be brought into existence sometime, so in that sense, it is created. This conversation was too abstract, so I was starting to get confused.
And so, Azusa, We have a request of you, a human. Will you wrestle the menace of this power under control? With your fame as the Witch of the Highlands, you may also be able to contain it. Essentially, We want you to fight against the power in Our place.
F-fight the power?!
Sure, I’d fought with gods in this world, so I didn’t think I’d be contending with anything even more absurd than that. To think I’d be asked to literally fight against the concept of power. It’s a word with all kinds of meanings.
I guess the power creep’s gotten so bad, I have to fight against the concept itself… We’re really starting to enter philosophical territory here…
You are human. It is acceptable for you to control and kill power. We shall trust you to choose an acceptable method.
Kill power…? Now that was another edgelord thing to say…
I guess once you reached max level, you could even defeat power. In a surprising twist, I’d reached even greater heights. Somehow.
But I wished I didn’t have to involve myself in all these troublesome affairs and could just live my relaxing life.
“By the way, do I have the right to say no?”
Tree frog, bullfrog, a rare golden frog—take your pick.
She sure was ready and willing to turn me into a frog if I said no.
“Let me just ask one more time, but how dangerous is this going to be? My opponent is so abstract, it’s hard for me to tell.”
I was going to mitigate my risks as much as possible. I couldn’t just take on this job and hope everything would be okay.
There is not even a one-in-a-million chance that you would lose. We cannot guarantee you will be itch-free, however.
Why would I get itchy…? Does power give people rashes…? Does it act like poison ivy…?
Well, whatever. Saying no wouldn’t be an option.
I was apparently the strongest being on this planet, after all.
I was probably the only one who could fight against something so extraordinary as power itself.
“Understood. I’ll take on your request, Nintan.”
Nintan’s expression softened.
Aye. We believed you would say that.
But still, she essentially just threatened me…
Also, this is a little off-topic, but We rather enjoy those magic livestreams the demons are conducting. We thought it might be a nice way to speak to Our believers, too.
“Oh no, you really shouldn’t force yourself to incorporate new essentials! They’ll just think it’s fishy! It’ll cheapen your image!”
I really wanted gods to stay solemn beings. Even the spirits started participating in the magic streams—please, god, not you, too!
And recently, We have heard of treats made with tea in the south. We see them occasionally in Our offerings.
Now this conversation is turning into a weird teatime chitchat. I’m fighting against power, hello?! Don’t just bring up sweets while I’m here!
Azusa, prove victorious against power and grasp glory for yourself.
The next moment, I realized I was in my bed in my house.
“It was just a dream…or not, I guess.”
If it wasn’t just a dream, then I’d be turned into a frog if I ignored it…
I hopped on Laika in her dragon form, and we headed to the grand temple that worshipped the goddess Nintan.
“This has truly become quite extraordinary, Lady Azusa,” Laika said to me. Even a dragon would be surprised to hear I would be battling against an abstract concept.
“That’s one word for it. How am I supposed to fight it? Does power even exist in the temple pond in the first place? Is this a riddle?”
What’s the scariest thing a pond can have?
I dunno. I have no answer for that.
“But you really are special, Lady Azusa, for a god to ask a favor of you! As your apprentice, I am truly proud!”
“No, please don’t flatter me like that! It’s just how things turned out!”
Laika would always immediately try to praise me, and I wished she would stop. It was so embarrassing.
“Battles with such powerful enemies are typically given to heroes and the like. That means you are this world’s greatest hero, Lady Azusa.”
“I mean, I probably could defeat any party of heroes that came my way…”
Did heroes even exist in this world? If so, then I’d be a target for vanquishing, considering I’m friends with the demon king…
We arrived at the outskirts of the capital city, then made our way to the town of Nintania, where the Grand Nintan Temple was.
But there was clearly something strange about this place.
Most of the people passing by had covered their entire bodies with skintight, stocking-like clothing, and some even covered their faces. It was like the whole city was filled with people wanted by the police.
“What’s with this dystopian vibe…?”
It was like a world where the air was too toxic to breathe without a mask.
“Lady Azusa, I am frightened of this place…” Laika’s fear was perfectly normal, despite her power. Her values were quite ladylike, after all. This was like something out of a nightmare—worse than a nightmare.
“I’m scared, too. I really have my work cut out for me this time. Thanks, Nintan…”
Not only that, but as we walked down the main avenue, we suddenly heard a scream.
“Eegyaaaaaaah! Eegyaaaaah! It hurts, it huuuurts!”
A man with his face covered writhed in agony.
What is going on…? This is terrifying!
“Laika, were there any prophecies that the world was going to be destroyed this year?”
“Hmm… There are always a number of cults announcing the end of the world in any era…”
Now that she mentioned it, I realized she was right. I guess there weren’t any doctrines that said we didn’t need faith anymore in modern times.
Everyone who passed by walked too quickly for us to clearly hear what they were saying, but we still caught snatches of conversations.
“This must be the wrath of the goddess Nintan—it has to be.”
“What other explanation is there? Some of her priests are saying it isn’t, though.”
“We need to find a way to soothe her anger quickly; otherwise, this town is done for…”
“Hey, speed up, or they’ll get you!”
I guess that would be the obvious line of thinking when you lived right at the foot of her temple.
Not only that, but since Nintan herself actually had nothing to do with this, she would surely be bothered by it.
“Laika, I know it’s uncomfortable, but let’s go to the temple. We’ll probably find out what’s causing this, at least.”
“Indeed… I must brace myself…”
We made our way toward the temple and its sparse crowd of visitors.
Then, when we arrived at Nintan’s temple, we were greeted by a shocking sight.
The pond was swarming with a seemingly infinite number of tiny black things. There were even swirls and vortices in the cloud.
We could also hear an unpleasant whining: eeeeee, eeeeee.
“Laika, is this…?”
“An insect that rarely makes its home in the cool highlands—mosquitoes,” Laika said, smacking her arm. Even as she did so, more came to land on her.
There had been a terrible misunderstanding.
Kill power ( )
Kill mosquitoes ( , or when written in kanji: )
“She wants me to do something about the mosquitoes! The Japanese subtitles made me think she wanted me to deal with her power!”
Was that my fault or hers…?
But power ( ) and mosquito ( ) really look awfully similar in Japanese… They’re practically indistinguishable… It’s like trying to tell apart earth ( ) and gentleman ( ), or pending ( ) and ending ( ) when someone has terrible handwriting.
“The area around the temple is surrounded by a pond, so they must have come in because there was a massive outbreak there.”
Mosquitoes did pop up wherever there was standing water.
“There’s so many. How are we supposed to get rid of them?”
Then a priest approached us, his body completely covered. “You are Azusa, the great Witch of the Highlands, yes?”
To be honest, he just looked like a cultist straight out of a horror movie. Laika even darted behind me in shock.
“An oracle told of your arrival. Please do something about these dreadful mosquitoes. Use whatever means necessary.”
For a moment, I thought, Don’t ask me to do this! Getting rid of the little bugs might be harder than you’d expect. This might be more of a challenge than a boss fight.
“Very well… I’ll do what I can…,” I said. Quietly, so that no mosquitoes would fly into my mouth.
“You will get bitten if you stand still, so please be careful. I believe you both have been bitten fifteen times already by now.”
““What?!”” Laika and I yelped in unison.
And the second he pointed it out, I immediately realized how itchy I was.
“Ack, everything itches!”
“Oh goodness, me too! They got my back! They got a spot I cannot reach!”
To think two of the strongest beings on this planet—me and my red-dragon apprentice, Laika—would both be laid so low!
Such is the power of mosquitoes. Were they really the strongest creatures in this world?!
All of a sudden, I sensed bloodthirst.
Laika’s eyes were glazed over. “Lady Azusa, let us exterminate these things. I am terribly cross at the moment.”
Oh no, her dragon anger was coming out…but then again, so was mine.
“You’re right. I’ll fight them with all I’ve got. We’ll burn them to a crisp.”
I’d show them what I could really do, and then they’d be sorry!
Laika and I went right to eradicating them.
“For bugs, we should stick with fire, right, Laika?”
“Indeed. I shall burn them all!”
I cast my Scorching Heat spell, and Laika breathed flames from her mouth. She was still in her human form—her flames could reach a much wider scale if she returned to her dragon form, but it was much harder for her to control her power because of that. We couldn’t afford to incinerate the temple; Nintan would be furious with us.
“Now burn, burn! Be gone!”
“Fwoooo, fwoooooooooooooom!”
“You take all my blood, and I’ll turn into a mummy. All things in moderation, you little bloodsuckers!”
“Fwoooo, fwoooooooooooooom!”
*Laika was breathing fire from her mouth, so she couldn’t talk.
When the flames made contact with the swarm of mosquitoes, there was a short sizzling sound as the legions died.
There was a saying that went even a worm will turn, but couldn’t we catch a break? I’d killed a lot of slimes, too, huh…? This was also a divine request, so I doubted we would be punished for this.
For the first five minutes, the priests had gathered to cheer us on—“Wow, incredible!” “Yes, please get them!”—but then they started worrying they would get bitten if they stayed still for too long and cleared out.
No one could afford to stick around and cheer—you had to keep moving if you didn’t want to suffer.
We burned and burned them for about thirty minutes, but—
“The mosquitoes are dispersing, which is making our attacks less effective…”
—they didn’t want to be torched so ungracefully. The swarms were gone, and the new strategy involved keeping their distance from one another. Or hiding in the grass or behind the trees, it seemed.
“There is only so much we can do like this… We cannot burn down the trees on the temple ground…”
Laika sat on a bench next to the lake, likely tired from breathing so much fire. But we were up against an incredibly formidable opponent this time. They would not allow us to rest.
“Hey, Laika, your neck and arms are all red. Did they bite you?”
“Oh, now that you mention it… And, Lady Azusa, your legs look awful…”
I had a feeling we had a lot more mosquito bites than when we came.
“Argh! Now that I’m thinking about it, I’m all itchy again!”
“This is torture! I can bear pain through the power of concentration, but I cannot do the same with itchiness! The impossible is most certainly impossible!”
We were so stupid!
It wasn’t like we were running around all over the place while we were spewing fire everywhere. We didn’t stand totally stock-still, but we hadn’t moved all that much.
That’s when the mosquitoes got us! All they had to do was get behind us while we were making the flames, and we were totally unprepared for them. They devoured our necks and legs!
It was like in old action games—if you got in a boss’s blind spot before it made an attack, you could deal all the damage you wanted.
Why were mosquitoes using boss strategies against us…? Ugh, they are really pissing me off!
“Laika, let’s retreat for now. This strategy isn’t working.”
“Yes. And, Lady Azusa, we perhaps should not stand still to have a conversation… We will be bitten in the meantime!”
“Yeah, if we move randomly, we might be a bit safer…”
We took shelter in the temple, doing a strange dance as we made our way there.
Also, at the entrance of the temple, there were three screen doors, possibly as a measure against the mosquitoes. It was almost unbelievable that they had to go that far.
When I entered the temple, I felt a force guiding me.
This sense was coming from the statue of Nintan.
“Oh, I get it now.”
“What is it, Lady Azusa?”
“Laika, hold my hand. If I treat you like my companion, then she’ll probably see you, too.”
“Your hand…? A-all right…” Laika gripped my hand. Shyly, for some reason. “I am somewhat embarrassed to be holding your hand, Lady Azusa. You are much greater than I am… But it is an honor…”
“Oh hey, the place where you’re squeezing doesn’t feel as itchy anymore.”
“…I-indeed.”
I had a feeling Laika was a bit fed up with me.
I picked up speed as I made my way straight toward the statue of Nintan.
“What?! Lady Azusa, we’re going to run into it!”
“It’s fine! Just trust me!”
The moment we leaped into the goddess statue—we were standing in Nintan’s realm.
It was the same as when I came with Goodly Godly Godness.
Like before, Nintan was standing right in front of us. It was more like she was floating, though.
“It seems your flame method did not go well, Azusa.”
“I mean, this is terrible. I had a feeling that strength alone wouldn’t be enough for this…”
Even though I was the strongest in the world, there were still things I couldn’t do.
“Lady Azusa, is the one floating there really the goddess Nintan?”
This would be Laika’s first time meeting her.
“Yes. We are the goddess Nintan. To think you would be unable to fend off these mosquitoes…” Nintan looked embarrassed. “Feel free to use this space and the temple as you see fit in order to solve this problem. Once you have successfully and safely dispatched the mosquitoes—”
“Then?”
“—then We shall praise you as the Mosquito Slayer! We will recognize you as Our patron saint who slays mosquitoes!”
“Please don’t!”
That would just make me a joke character.
What the heck would a witch who’s strong against mosquitoes be anyway? Someone who’s researched what plants to use in mosquito-repellent coils…?
Nintan’s gaze darkened into something a bit sterner.
“And We will not condone any partial efforts. You cannot merely try; you must succeed. We will not allow you to return home until you do something about the mosquitoes.”
Eep… That was some unethical treatment for a deity…
“Why not ask another god for help instead of me? There has to be some god community out there, right?”
“No one will solve the problem for Us. As We mentioned in your dream, casually killing off the mosquitoes will send the message that mosquitoes, despite being a divine creation, should not have been brought into this world in the first place. It is a manner of honor, so I cannot do that.”
Though mosquitoes must be doing what they could to survive, they were causing harm to a lot of people, so this wasn’t easy.
“Is there no mosquito god?” Laika asked. “There is a jellyfish spirit, so there might perhaps be one.”
Good suggestion. If jellyfish have a spirit, why not mosquitoes?
“Unfortunately, no. If there were, We would have heard about it immediately.”
Yeah, they would probably be treated like a joke by the other gods…
“Rather, We would have crushed that mosquito god. Remove them from existence!”
“No need to go that far!”
But the mosquito god was a good starting point.
“Hey, I have an idea!”
“Excellent. We have solved it.”
“Wonderful, Lady Azusa! There is truly nothing you cannot do!”
No, wait, all I did was get an idea, so please don’t praise me just yet…
“Even if there is no mosquito god, there must be a specialist for bugs. I think we should leave this to a professional. And luckily, I happen to know one.”
“You know someone who is knowledgeable about mosquitoes, Lady Azusa?”
“I’m not sure if she knows about mosquitoes, but she might. I want to give her a call, so I’ll just go to an empty room, okay?”
If I summoned her into Nintan’s personal space, I was afraid something might bug out because of the difference in space-time. Accidentally erasing someone from existence is no laughing matter.
After leaving Nintan’s realm, I tried using the summoning spell in an empty room. I drew the magic circle in the carpet. It would still be effective even if I didn’t actually make permanent lines.
“Vosanosanonnjishidow veiani enlira!”
Nothing around me changed.
“Oh, I guess I was off again…”
After I finished casting, I searched around the temple and finally found Beelzebub.
As always, the summoning spell brought her somewhere nearby. At least she hadn’t been placed right above the lake.
“Hey, Azusa, where is this?”
“The grand temple of the goddess Nintan.”
“’Tis a deity the humans worship. Should a demon like me be in such a place?”
I had Nintan’s permission, so it shouldn’t be a problem. Also—
“There’s a powerful foe that I must fight that crosses the boundaries between demons and humans!”
I brought Beelzebub into Nintan’s space, and we talked. About the mosquitoes, of course.
“…Aye. I understand there are more mosquitoes now, and things have grown troublesome.”
“Yes, exactly. We’re so busy taking care of them that we literally can’t stay still.”
But the expression on Beelzebub’s face told me she still wasn’t satisfied with something.
“And so then why have you summoned me? Mosquitoes have naught to do with demons or monsters. They are insects, no?”
“See, they call you the Lord of the Flies, right? Mosquitoes are like their cousins, so I figured you might be able to do something. Operation: Ask a Fly About a Mosquito!”
“Oh-ho, I see, I see. I understand now. ”
For some reason, Beelzebub was grinning at me. It was creeping me out. Like the calm before the storm, the harbinger of anger to come…
“Are you a fool?! No, you are a fool! One can only be so foolish!!”
“I knew you’d get mad!”
I guess what I said brought her wrath on me…
I thought it was a pretty good idea, though…
“Huh? But mosquitoes fly, too. Aren’t they similar? They’re annoying and hover around people…”
“They bear some resemblance, but they are entirely different! I may be able to transform into a fly, but this is still my basic form! I am nothing like a simple fly! And I know nothing about mosquitoes!”
My plan was already crumbling.
“You could at least turn into a fly and then ask the mosquitoes to move somewhere else, right…?”
“No. I cannot converse with flies anyway.”
“Oh, so you’re just a fake fly…”
Beelzebub pinched my cheek and stretched it out! She was attacking me!
“Listen here, you! Real flies may be inferior creatures, but I am a proud member of demonkind! Do not look at me as the same as other flies out there!”
“Oh-hay! I geh ih, leh me go!”
I went to all the trouble of summoning Beelzebub, and my only accomplishment so far was getting her to stop pinching me.
“Listen. The outbreak of mosquitoes is indeed great, but they are still no more than mosquitoes. You are all larger than life. All three of you, even that human-faith goddess, are larger than life.”
It didn’t seem like the demons had any respect for human deities at all. Not everyone could say that in front of a god. Although a human might lose some reverence for a goddess after being dragged in for pest control.
“Hmph, Beelzebub, was it? Do you mock Us?”
Oh no… I can already imagine a fight breaking out…
“Then go into the garden! Learn how terrifying and dreadful mosquitoes can be!”
Or not…
“Very well, then I shall prove to you that mosquitoes count for nothing!” Beelzebub marched out of Nintan’s space with purpose.
“Demons don’t worship human gods, do they? Though I guess that’s obvious,” I asked.
“Demons believe the current demon king’s ancestor is the deity who birthed them,” explained Beelzebub. “That god also appears in human myth, but they consider other gods from human myths to be inconsequential.”
If I asked Shalsha about that stuff, I bet she would tell me all about it. She would probably tell me so much that I might not be able to keep up, but I’d ask her next time.
Then, about thirty minutes after Beelzebub left for the garden with the pond…her whole body was covered in mosquito bites.
“I’m so itchy… Everything itches… Please give me itch cream…”
“Ha! This is your punishment for scorning the likes of mosquitoes,” said Nintan. “Rushing headfirst into a swarm with so much exposed skin is suicide! Be mindful of the mosquitoes from now on.”
Wait, so disrespecting the mosquitoes is a bigger offense than disrespecting a god…?
Maybe she had a point. As of right now, a god, a high-ranking demon, and the apparent strongest being in the world (me) had all lost to the mosquitoes, so—
Strong people < Mosquitoes
—that would put a sign of inequality between us… I don’t like that…
“Mmm… I shall mend my ways… Next time, I will turn into a fly in areas with lots of mosquitoes to avoid getting bitten.”
That might be effective, sure, but that only works for you, Beelzebub.
“But how I share your hatred for mosquitoes. I will make it so they can stay here no longer!”
Hey! Beelzebub joined our side in the end!
“Do you have a plan, great demon?” Nintan asked. The goddess was willing to rely even on a demon if the option was there for her.
“I do!” Beelzebub extended her right index finger. “What you have been doing thus far is symptomatic treatment. You simply killed some mosquitoes because there were more of them. There will be no end to them. You must attack at the source.”
“And what is your plan?”
Beelzebub grinned.
“Drain the water in the garden pond!”
Wh-what?!
Laika, Nintan, and I were all shocked.
I see—doing that could probably work as a fundamental solution.
“Listen. The mosquitoes multiply because the stagnant pond water creates an optimal environment for them to lay their eggs. Without the water, they will lose their habitat!”
Back in medieval times, people thought mosquitoes and other small insects came from nothing, but it seemed it was common knowledge in this world that they sprang up from those tiny larvae.
“But there are all sorts of other creatures that live in the pond…”
I also understood Nintan’s apprehensions. She was not in a position to sacrifice the other creatures in the temple.
“We simply need to move those other creatures to another spot temporarily. That will also allow us to remove the excess invasive fish and clutter in the ponds, thereby improving the water quality. I believe the mosquitoes have increased so much due to problems with the water.”
Hey, so the demon did have a rational idea.
“We are not convinced that Our believers would throw garbage into Our waters, but We did suspect the pond was dirty. Perhaps it would be a good idea to drain the water in earnest at least once…”
Nintan sounded like she was on board. Problem solved?
“The pond in the garden takes up quite a bit of acreage, however. It seems to be quite deep as well. We may need a considerable workforce to do this.” Laika seemed uneasy as she put her hand to her lips.
This wasn’t just getting rid of a puddle.
“This great goddess may be able to do something about that, no? She is a great goddess, yes? Does she not have a considerable number of believers?”
Beelzebub was very obviously nudging Nintan.
“Of course We do! We shall send out an oracle to have all Our believers gather here from across the country right away! This is the goddess Nintan’s all-out attack on the mosquitoes!”
Did she just call this an all-out attack on mosquitoes? At this rate, she was going to lose her goddess card…
“Either way, the engineering work will take at least a few days. I shall return to Vanzeld Castle.” Beelzebub left immediately.
“Nintan, could we go back home, too?”
“Yes. We shall summon you again in a dream.”
I kind of wanted her to show just a little more appreciation. We were working for free, but at least the goddess was actually listening to us. Some companies won’t even give you that…
Except that wasn’t really what was happening.
When we returned to the temple, the priests gave us all sorts of treasures as gifts.
But despite their generosity, it was still a little too much for Laika to take back on a single return trip. We had no choice but to leave the better half of it here.
“The goddess bade us give these to you. Please, take them.”
“Huh…? We can’t accept this…”
“We have been given all sorts of donations over the ages, so they will simply pile up if we do not pass them along to others. Please accept these gifts.”
They were just getting rid of their knickknacks…
But I had a feeling there were a lot of shrines and temples in Japan that received treasures from important figures, so maybe religious institutions just tended to collect those kinds of things. And Laika seemed rather interested in the items, so I guess it was fine.
“This golden mask is quite an article. And this sword is of such fine make!”
They did say dragons collected gold, so maybe she was just broadly interested in these curios.
On the other hand, it didn’t seem like Flatorte would be very interested in them, so maybe I was generalizing too much.
Guess we’ll leave the treasures in an empty room.
I had a feeling the house in the highlands was going to have a lot more of these knickknacks before we were through.
No Comments Yet
Post a new comment
Register or Login