WE WENT TO A DEMON ARCADE
“How have you all been~? Especially the girls~?”
During dinner, Beelzebub popped over for a visit like it was nothing.
“Did you eat already? If you haven’t, then why not join us? We got some good figs today, so I made a sauce out of them.”
No one was surprised anymore when Beelzebub came over. She was kind of like our next-door neighbor. Though, there were no other houses near the house in the highlands, so we didn’t have any neighbors, strictly speaking.
“I suppose I might. I also brought some Veritart grapes and Veritart lemons as a gift. They were raised in the cold regions.”
Beelzebub produced some massive grapes and lemons.
“I’m guessing those are going to be sour. Could you bring something sweeter next time…?”
“Demons love the tartness. One can make a drink out of this that will wake you up in the morning with a good jolt. It’s perfect for tackling hangovers as well!”
“Then I’ll use them for Halkara.”
“What! Why are they just for me?!” Halkara protested, but as someone who had seen her hungover and pale with alarming frequency, I ignored her. If she could recover with one drink, this solution was a no-brainer.
Beelzebub brought over a chair from the corner, like it was business as usual, and sat between Falfa and Shalsha. It practically felt like she lived here now.
“So, Miss Beelzebub, what brings you here today?” Laika had learned how to receive Beelzebub as well.
Most of the time, Beelzebub brought requests or invitations with her. When she had neither, she brought more gifts with her. Simply coming over empty-handed was apparently frowned upon among the demons.
“You must know how we demons established diplomatic relations with the Thursa Kingdom in secret not too long ago, no?”
I mean, I was there.
The Thursa Thursa Kingdom was a husk of an ancient civilization populated entirely by ghosts. The ghosts themselves seemed to be having a good time, though, so it wasn’t much of a problem.
However, if humans found out about them, there was some danger of them being exorcised, so Pecora wouldn’t be making any public announcements about it to the demons.
I mean, with the demon king sitting at the top, the demon world wasn’t a popular sovereignty. She could establish all the diplomatic ties she wanted.
“The Thursa Thursa Kingdom taught us a bit of their ancient magic technology. There is no question that the town around Vanzeld Castle will be developing rapidly in the future.”
“That is a grand plan.” Laika was simply praising her, but technological innovations for the demons would be terrifying to a human who was afraid of them…
“I hear a shop that has made use of this ancient magic is just about to open. Why not come take a look? You already know the owner. Perfect, no?”
If it was someone we knew, then that naturally eliminated a lot of people.
“Did Fighsly get some money to open a shop?”
If anyone was the greedy kind, it was Fighsly the fighter.
“No. Here, just look at the flyer. I think the children will quite enjoy this~”
The flyer Beelzebub produced was written in the human language. I wondered if she went out of her way to translate it for us.
“This doesn’t really tell me much…”
What I could tell, though, was that Pondeli had made it. After all her time spent inside playing games, she knew so much about them. She’d even made a card game, so she had the skill.
“We need to be discreet in our use of ancient magic, you see. Though it’s currently limited in its use, we are thinking about increasing its scope if the test run at Pondeli’s store proves successful. I shall grant you special privileges to play there just before its opening!”
Now I knew the motive behind Beelzebub’s visit.
“So you want us to test out the store.”
“What a terrible way to put it! You are the first people to be invited to this shop before its grand opening. Be thankful!”
Even though I could imagine this creating trouble, there was still something for us to be thankful about.
My three daughters were the most excited I’d seen them in some time.
“An arcade… I don’t understand what that means, but it brings me joy… I feel like a flower blooming.”
“Falfa is so excited!”
“We need to be careful—money can fly out of your hands at a place like this. The wise thing to do is decide how much change we’ll need ahead of time… I want to make a habit out of simplicity and frugality…”
I didn’t think the arcade would have any lesser effect. In a way, there were only so many things children could play with in this world, so it was perfect.
Well, Falfa and Shalsha enjoyed their studies and research like normal, so it hadn’t really been a problem.
“Mommy! Let’s go! Falfa wants to play!”
“We must go and inspect this store.”
“I-I’m not really that interested… But we can’t not go after we’ve been invited…”
Sandra’s genuine feelings were obvious despite her sour exterior, which was cute. That reluctant front was such a cute kid thing. If they acted like that even after growing up, though, they were just a pain to deal with…
She wasn’t the only one excited—but Rosalie had different reasons as she whirled in circles by the ceiling.
“An arcade… When I hear that word, I just want to hang around there as a ghost all day!”
You delinquent girl! Are you planning to make it a hangout spot for you and your delinquent friends?!
By the way, even though Rosalie never did any evil, she was treated as an evil spirit. Spirits who had no regrets moved on to their next lives without remaining as ghosts. So spirits who hung around the earthly realm were, by definition, the same as poltergeists.
It was a mystery what regrets Rosalie still held, but I wanted her to stick around as long as she could.
Anyway, we came to a conclusion.
“All right, everyone, let’s go to the arcade!”
The whole family went to the town around Vanzeld Castle.
I’d grown familiar with the city after the many times I’d come here. I generally knew what was on the big avenues.
Of course, it didn’t seem like the arcade would be right on the main street.
“It is in a spot that’s a bit tucked away. Rent on the main avenue is high, so a business needs to be thriving to set up shop there. We will be testing it out somewhere quieter first.”
Beelzebub entered a tiny street just off the avenue and proceeded down an even narrower path.
I might be biased, but the demons walking around here looked like bad dudes.
Halkara was frightened. “I’m going to get mugged…”
“There have been reports of terrible threats being made in this area. Well, if someone did try that with us, they would be immediately arrested. There is no need to worry.”
“But still, shops in a place like this must really want to keep quiet about their businesses—”
An establishment with a rather colorful, gaudy sign appeared before us.
It probably read ARCADE PON DE LI (but it was written in Demon, so I couldn’t read it).
There were even cat ears on the roof. Bet it’s because Pondeli used to be a catperson…
“It’s so bright… This place really stands out…”
“Success for a shop like this rests on its impact. We have also used glass for the entrance to make the inside clearly visible. That should make it more welcoming.”
When Beelzebub said that, I realized she was right.
“Now, girls, approach the glass doors.”
Stop calling them that; they are my girls! I thought, but my daughters paid that no mind and stepped forward.
The glass doors then slid open.
“Whoooaaa! That’s so convenient! We don’t have to open them!”
“Some magic must have activated when it sensed someone nearby. That is some high-level spell crafting.”
Falfa and Shalsha looked at the doors with great interest.
“I see, automatic doors…”
Even though it was totally doable without ancient magic, whoever’d implemented it would have had to create a special barrier around the entrance, which would have taken a lot of time and effort.
“Indeed. It moves on its own. Neat trick, no?”
Sandra made a beeline inside with Falfa and Shalsha right on her heels. The rest of us followed suit.
But these automatic doors had a bit of a problem.
Once a certain amount of time passed, the glass doors suddenly shut—
—with Halkara wedged between them.
“What is happening?! It hurts! I’m being squeezed in half!”
The doors were attacking Halkara!
“Ah yes, I forgot to mention that after the door is open for a moment, it will suddenly shut. You must take care.”
“We kinda figured that out already! Don’t forget important stuff like that!”
I guess the sensors didn’t hold the doors open if they still sensed people around…
“I see. There is a possibility of people getting caught in the doors. They need improvement—okay.”
I heard a decidedly calm voice that didn’t belong to Beelzebub or a member of my family.
Pondeli was taking notes. She looked extremely pale—which was a normal shade for an undead.
“Oh, Pondeli, long time no see~”
“Hello! Feel free to play-test as many games as you like today. I want to get your feedback and make improvements anywhere there’s a problem.”
Yep, we were guinea pigs. Still, maybe Halkara’s noble sacrifice would help fix the safety problem with the entrance.
“Those doors of yours are dangerous,” Beelzebub pointed out.
“They are. I’ll put a sign on the door that says This establishment claims no responsibility for any harm caused by the doors.”
“Hey! Just fix the thing!”
Don’t try to fight your way out of it by waiving responsibility! This is your problem.
“The maintenance of ancient magic is so difficult~ All right, why don’t you get started over there?”
There was a whole row of cabinets that looked like game machines inside. We were definitely in an arcade.
One in particular caught my eye; it was a booth that could fit about three or four people.
There was a curtain over it, as if it was an independent shop. It looked a little like a fitting room.
“Pondeli, what’s that booth over there?”
“You are very sharp, Miss Azusa~ That is an attraction I call the Caricature Booth. Pay money, and you get an image of yourself.”
“I have a feeling there used to be contraptions like that back in Japan. Amazing…”
I guess that meant this world had photography now. I wouldn’t be surprised if there was an ancient spell like that.
That means I can take pictures of my daughters as they grow up!
I immediately scooped my three girls up in a hug.
“Let’s go to that Caricature Booth over there!”
“Wow, Azusa, you’re unusually demanding today.”
“It looks like fun, so Falfa is happy to try!”
“Shalsha is willing, too.”
What kind of pose should we do? Maybe funny faces? Well, maybe a normal smile first would be best. And I’ll put my hands on my jaw to make my face look smaller.
And so we entered the Caricature Booth.
Inside, there was a table where a demon sat wearing something that looked like a beret.
“Welcome. One pic is a thousand koinne,” the demon said.
Koinne, by the way, was the currency of the demon world.
“…Here. A thousand koinne.”
Why was someone in here? Was this a staff member who operated a special machine?
When I handed over my thousand koinne to the demon, he started dashing his pen across the paper with incredible speed.
“Hoo! Hah! Hoo! Finished! Here you go!”
He handed me a picture of me with my three daughters.
Yeah, it was pretty good… Wait, this was literally a booth where someone drew a caricature of us! This had nothing to do with magic!
When we left the Caricature Booth, Pondeli was waiting for us with an expectant look.
“How was it? That was the best caricature artist in the entire Vanzeld Castle area!”
“There was nothing magical about it! Why did you show us this first?”
“Well, I know it’s not a game, but my instinct whispered to me that we needed caricatures to sit in front of the games. I wanted to make the atmosphere inviting for women, too.”
I wondered if she’d spent her past life in Japan, too.
“Regardless, I am going to take good care of this picture. It’s really well done. I’ll put it up at home.”
I wanted everyone else to have their caricatures done, too.
“Why don’t you check that one out next? It’s called Punch Striker!”
In that corner stood a skeleton demon—or someone who was made of bone, at any rate. I wasn’t sure if it was okay to classify demons like that.
There was also a demon standing next to it, wearing a mage’s outfit.
“Judging by the name…I guess we strike the skeleton…?”
“Yes, yes. Now why don’t we try it out?” Flatorte immediately stepped forward. “I, the great Flatorte, will show you the power of my punch!”
Flatorte got a running start—
“Yaaah!”
—and drove a forceful punch right into the skeleton’s chest.
I saw it coming, but the skeleton’s bones shattered, and it crumpled to the ground. Poor thing…
“Heh… This is what happens when I, the great Flatorte, attacks. Now, how is this supposed to be a game?”
The other demon standing beside the skeleton inspected the pile of bones, then wrote something down on a paper.
“Here, your score is ninety-five points. That’s today’s high score. Congratulations.” The demon handed the paper to Flatorte.
“…Huh? Oh, I don’t really get why, but I’m glad I got the high score…”
The demon then restored the skeleton’s body with some kind of Regeneration magic.
“Yes, that’s how you do it. You compete through points, and you get more based on how much of the skeleton you destroyed with a punch! It is perfect for relieving stress!”
“Couldn’t you have done this in a way that wasn’t so graphic?! It’s so sad thinking of the skeleton shattering to bits every time!”
“The skeleton and I hit it off at an undead get-together, so he came to work here. Please hit him as hard as you can.”
“Yes, I enjoy having my bones broken. It feels nice.”
I didn’t know Pondeli had those lateral connections. I also didn’t know the skeleton could talk…
“Oh, Madam Teacher, Miss Beelzebub said she had work to do and left,” Halkara reported to me long after Beelzebub had taken her leave.
She probably didn’t care about this about this at all…
“Next is Whack-the-Undead-Mole.”
“You sure are making use of your undead network!”
“Undead moles will appear from the holes, so please smash them with the attached morning star.”
“Please make it a wooden hammer! Or something that doesn’t have much force! Hitting them with a morning star will make things really gross!”
In the end, Laika was given a wooden hammer instead.
“Here I go! Hah! Yah! Rah! Hah! Yah!”
She whacked the undead moles in a rhythmical fashion.
Even using a wooden hammer, Laika the dragon still exerted a lot of force. Copious screaming ensued.
“Gwaaagh!”
“Weeegh!”
“Eeeegh!”
The undead moles sounded like they were in pain…
Squish… Splurt…
One of Laika’s attacks finally popped out one of their eyes.
“Their screams are giving me the creeps!”
This was going to ring in my ears for ages. I really wished Pondeli just had them say Ow!
“I decided on this style for the sake of realism.”
“We don’t need realism for this!”
I didn’t think whack-a-mole was designed to satisfy one’s urge to slaughter moles.
Now done with the game, Laika returned to us with a dark expression.
“I…feel as though I have been forced to confront my own aggression… My heart has clouded over… I suppose power is nothing more than a tool to hurt others…”
“Laika, don’t let that get into your head, okay? It’s just a game! There’s no crime or punishment here!”
Hmm… It looked a lot like an arcade, but it was more horrifying than I’d imagined… This might have some adverse effects on the kids who visited.
It was heartwarming to watch Falfa and Shalsha hit the skeleton with their cute little punches, but whack-the-undead-mole would get gruesome for anyone, even children.
“Ooh…your bones are too hard… Shalsha might have hurt her arm…”
“Oh no, little miss, are you okay? We will use some Regeneration magic on you!”
And now the skeleton was getting worried!
The demon who revived the skeleton cast a Restoration spell on Shalsha. I guess when someone wasn’t strong enough, they could get hurt… There were a lot of problems here, weren’t there…?
“Little miss, hit me here! It is more fragile!”
“Okay. I thank you for the instruction.”
The skeleton was teaching her… This place was overall way more relaxed than Japanese arcades. It was full of human warmth—even though everyone here was dead.
There was still a fundamental problem, though.
“Pondeli, of all the attractions here, the automatic doors are the only things using the new magic technology.”
It was unclear how much Pondeli knew about ancient magic, but she should have known it was full of magical techniques unknown to demonkind. Despite that, she was barely using it.
Even the Caricature Booth just had an artist inside. It wasn’t even magic.
“No, we do indeed have an attraction that uses the magitech that Her Majesty bestowed on us. I am confident this next one will be one of the most—if not the most—popular game in this store!”
The most popular arcade games were usually—
“I call this the Fork Doll Catcher!”
When I heard the name, I had a general idea of what it was. Oh, this is going to be a claw machine thing.
“The game is over there! Please give it a go!”
Pondeli pointed to what looked like a glass case mounted on a piece of furniture.
There were several stuffed animals inside and what looked like buttons on the lower part of the case. If I pressed one of those buttons, the claw would start moving.
If claw machines had existed in medieval Europe, I bet this was how they would have looked.
The stuffed animals were all based off monsters—slimes, dragons, mummies, and the sort. The stuffed slime was pretty cute.
“Okay, then I’ll do this one, Pondeli.” I rolled up my sleeves as I approached the machine.
“Ohhh! You’re raring to go, Miss Azusa!”
“I think I’ve got a good idea of what to do. You’re using the new magic technology in the part that moves the claw, right?”
“I am impressed! You understand this well! That is exactly right. For a long time, I had been thinking about a game where the player retrieves stuffed animals, but it would have been much too difficult to operate the part that grabs them with our more familiar magic.”
It would have been a lot of work to replicate that distinctive arm movement with magic alone.
First, you needed some rather unique spells just to move an object at all. If you simply wanted to blast something away, that was easy enough. You just used Wind magic.
Installing magic of an appropriate physical force to operate the arm’s circuit, though, then deciding whether to grab onto the doll, was no ordinary feat.
It seemed ancient magic was much more advanced when it came to manipulating objects, so they were making use of that technology.
“There are two buttons, right? The first button moves the arm right and left, and you decide with the second button to either move it toward you or away from you. Then, when you let go of the first button, the arm stops. When you let go of the second button, the arm goes straight down.”
“Well! You sound like you’ve seen this before, Miss Azusa!”
I absolutely have.
This was entirely unrelated, but in some manga I’d read in my previous life, claw machines appeared in a whole lot of date scenes—why was that? Did people really play them a lot on dates?
Even if I got a stuffed animal on a date, I wouldn’t know what to do with it. Especially if we broke up. Then, anything I got stuck with would just be a painful reminder. Some places had candy for prizes instead.
Well…whatever, let’s just forget about my past life for now…
Okay, so I knew how to operate the machine, but I didn’t see the arm in question. It was just a guess, but I figured it folded up into the ceiling when it wasn’t in operation.
“It starts working when you insert a coin! Please insert one hundred koinne for one go. You can have six chances if you insert five hundred koinne.”
So detailed…
I inserted one hundred koinne into the coin slot.
Just as I imagined, the arm appeared from above—but it was different from what I’d imagined.
This wasn’t an arm. It was a fork. A fork with three tines!
Oh yeah, Pondeli had called it the Fork Doll Catcher, hadn’t she…?
Whatever… Okay, time to move the fork…
I positioned the fork above a slime (doll).
The trident dropped, impaling it!
Yikes!
“This is not a good way to catch things! Plus, if it’s stabbing the prizes, it’ll be easy to beat!”
With the slime (doll) still stuck on its prongs, the fork retracted, brought the doll to the drop slot—
—and another machine appeared and knocked the doll off the fork.
“That was ruthless!”
My slime (doll) appeared in the prize drop.
It had three holes where the fork had impaled it… Some of the stuffing was sticking out… Poor thing…
“You got it in one try! What incredible skill!” Pondeli was applauding me.
“Wait, wait, wait! This is really messed up! Make it grab the prizes with a softer touch!”
“I kept actual combat in mind and settled on a fork. You stick your quarry, and it is very hard to get it off once it’s stuck.”
“So anyone can win. You’re not going to make any money if everyone gets it on their first try.”
“Oh, you’re right… All our prizes will get claimed, and we will fall into the red…”
It sounded like she’d stopped thinking about this right before taking profit into consideration.
Flatorte and Halkara tried it afterward, and they easily got their dolls since the fork securely stabbed them.
“I’m glad to get a stuffed doll, but the holes are putting a bit of a damper on my excitement…”
Halkara’s opinion spoke for me.
“Ooh… This game needs tuning… To think my centerpiece would have a hitch like this…”
Pondeli’s arcade might have hit a few snags before even opening. Better to catch them now than later, though.
“But we do still have our ace in the hole!”
Now that she mentioned it, Pondeli had said one of the most popular when she was talking about the claw machine.
That basically meant there was another game that could compete with it.
“Please don’t tell me we’re hitting slimes instead of moles this time.”
“No need to worry about that! The concept of this game is completely different and made entirely possible by our new magical technology! It is extremely fun!”
If she was praising it that much, I figured I might as well take a look.
“Here it is!” Pondeli smacked a table.
In its center were two exquisite-looking dolls.
“We call this Battle Dolls!”
Oh, this one was going to be like a fighting game.
Pondeli started explaining Battle Dolls.
“The person playing this game moves the lever on the table in front of them. It is connected to magic that lets the doll operate on its own, so the figure on the table will then move. Whoever depletes the other’s life gauge first is the winner.”
So it was a fighting game. Very clearly a fighting game.
“Additionally, you can play on your own, but there is an operating lever on the opposite side. If you want to play against someone else, you can.”
So you can fight an opponent.
This really was interesting. Games that let you move and fight with actual, physical dolls didn’t exist in the arcades in my past life.
Not only that, but the ancient magic of the Thursa Thursa Kingdom was exceptionally good at controlling objects. After all, Muu practically lived her life by manipulating her doll-like body, as it were. Was it possible for the dolls in this game to move as well as real people?
“I’ll give it a try.”
My assumptions were right. The dolls danced smoothly and fluidly over the field, and I could activate moves by inputting commands.
Yeah, this was a lot of fun, actually. Way better than watching a fork impale a stuffed animal.
“Mommy, Falfa wants to play this game!”
“I can hardly contain myself. Falfa, I challenge you!”
Starting with the first match between Falfa and Shalsha, the entire family went crazy over Battle Dolls.
“And there are so many characters you can pick! It’s so interesting. Even as a ghost watching over your shoulder, I can tell how fun it is.”
“Laika, you will battle with me, the great Flatorte!”
“I shall not lose! In a game or otherwise!”
It was a big hit. Such a big hit, in fact, that I had to wait forever for my turn.
“Oh, I’m so glad; what a relief… I think I’ll be able to open the arcade thanks to this.”
Pondeli had her hand placed on her chest. She must have been relieved since she was essentially the manager here.
“This is a good game. You could probably rake in more money with more tables.”
“Indeed. Each table is incredibly expensive, though…”
Arcades had their struggles in every world—but I really didn’t want to hear about them now.
After several rounds, my turn finally came up.
“Now that I’m here, I kind of want to try out the story mode.”
Words floated above the table where the dolls stood. Hey, this is like some kind of AR show.
STORY
Once upon a time, there lived an elderly baron and baroness.
One day, the baroness went to the river and saw a big apple bobbing up and down, as it flowed with the stream.
This story was sounding a lot like Momotaro… It was taking too long, so I pressed the button to skip ahead a bit.
…And so the Apple Baron, now grown, ended up arguing with the viscount from the neighboring land.
It was then that they decided to battle.
The story was sloppy, but it didn’t matter. The first battle was against the viscount. The viscount doll turned to face my Apple Baron. Ready, fight!
I started to rapidly taptaptap, taptap, tatatatap the button.
The Apple Baron produced a spell of bright-red flames. Okay, so that’s a special technique.
“Wow! Lady Azusa, you are so skilled! I had no idea you could use such a technique!”
“You even play games at a pro level, Mistress!”
The audience behind me was getting riled up, too.
I tried commands that I thought might create a special move, and they usually did.
I definitely wasn’t a gamer, but it wasn’t like I’d never played a fighting game before. I could figure out the controls mostly by instinct.
I defeated the first enemy, the viscount; then the second, an alcoholic hunter who got into an argument with me at the tavern; and then the third, a swordsman who picked a fight with me on the street corner.
All these altercations started with verbal arguments—couldn’t they do something about that? It might be realistic for someone with a chip on their shoulder, but what about fighting for what’s right?
Narrative critiques like that aside—
I crushed the enemies one after the other and progressed through the story.
Now that fighting games had been introduced to the world, did that mean I had an unfair advantage here thanks to my experiences?
The day they call me Azusa, Pro Gamer, might not be far off. Heh-heh-heh…
—Then something else suddenly popped up on the screen.
A new player has joined the fray. Do you accept this challenge?
YES NO
Oh, I guess that meant a new player was entering. I would gladly take them on.
My opponent was using a female martial-artist character. Just what I was hoping for.
“Don’t lose, Apple Baron!”
But—things were starting to go a little sideways.
The Apple Baron’s challenger, the martial artist, used a low kick to knock him into the air.
Then, while he was still airborne, she used another low kick to send him back up again.
“Hey, wait! I’m getting juggled! That’s not fair!”
The Apple Baron couldn’t do anything against those low kicks and lost.
“Geez… It’s amazing you discovered that move, but at least make it fair. Who is that? Pondeli?”
Pondeli was standing right beside me, though. “I can’t have this. I need to improve the game balance…”
At least she was actually planning on adjusting that.
I assumed the culprit must be someone in the family, but everyone was standing near me.
“You still have a long ways to go, Miss Azusa.” My opponent stood up from across the table.
Fighsly.
A professional martial artist! Hey, she even stunlocked people in real tournaments, too!
“Miss Fighsly, I know this is a game, but I can’t say I approve of using these methods to win… I am not pleased with this at all.” Ever serious, Laika offered some candid advice. And she was right. That was mean.
“I understand. Then I will seal away the low-kick move next time. And yes, I would like a rematch with you, Miss Azusa. What do you say?” Fighsly gave an intrepid smile.
“I have no problem with that. Let’s get to it.”
Time to win back my pride!
—We played game after game, but I lost every time…
…and several of those times, I didn’t even do any damage…
She was on another level…
“Fighsly, you’re way too good at this game…”
“Yes. This is all I’ve been doing, after all.”
Fighsly puffed out her chest with the pride of a martial artist.
“I can tell that, one day, there will be tournaments using these fighting games with prize money on the line. I plan on earning all that tournament money.”
E-sports!
“And when that day comes, I will not have to fight using my body, which I greatly appreciate. No pain! I hope it comes soon!”
“Your motives have never been very becoming of a martial artist!”
Afterward, we heard that the games at the arcade underwent fine-tuning with Fighsly’s input, and the balance changed for the better.
As long as the ancient magic wasn’t being used for dangerous purposes, I had no complaints.
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