“What?! The letter’s missing, you say?!”
“Forgive me, sir! Someone in the castle must have taken it...”
The king approached the prime minister, his expression grave. The letter the prime minister had lost was a love letter written from the king to the most beloved songstress in all the land. He’d planned to secretly deliver it, but had accidentally left it in the castle’s reception room, where it had presumably been swept away by someone in the castle.
“If the queen finds it, we’ll be done for! Done for, I say!”
“Oh no! Oh no indeed! My wife cannot find that letter! I’m much too young to die!”
The king stormed out of the room with the prime minister in tow, but in his haste, he accidentally bashed his knee against a nearby table and stubbed his toe on a chair. The audience howled with laughter as the actor playing the king hopped around on one foot and screamed.
“If he’s so scared, why did he cheat on his wife to begin with?”
“That’s a good question...”
I could hear Quun and Frei muttering. I didn’t know why this scene had me feeling so nervous. I mean, it wasn’t like I had anything to hide... Maybe I just felt a kinship with the character, since we were both royals and all.
Hmm... Maybe my kids shouldn’t be watching this.
The play was indeed the story of a common girl who worked as a maid in the royal court. It was a slapstick comedy about the events that happened after she accidentally picked up a love letter that wasn’t meant to be seen. It had a wide cast of characters with wacky personalities. There was the lusty king who had a crush on the songstress, the snooty queen who butted into everyone’s business, the money-grubbing prime minister, the foolish knights, a clumsy head chef, and the vain chief maid. Each of the characters played off one another quite well.
All I could think about was how screwed this nation would be if it was real. There were a bunch of clowns in charge. And as I thought about the show, I turned my attention back to the stage. The king was laughing like a madman after reclaiming what he thought was his letter from the protagonist.
“Hurray! I’ve got it at last! Now let me just... Wait, what is this? This isn’t my letter at all! It’s someone’s tavern bill!”
“It must’ve been swapped with the letter, sir!”
“Auugh!” the king cried out in disbelief. The chef, who bumped into the protagonist by mistake, accidentally took the letter in place of their bar tab.
The people of the palace kept on wandering all over the place, resulting in the letter changing hands multiple times. The desperate situation only intensified, which meant bigger laughs from the audience.
“This sure is chaotic.”
“Yeah... It’s amazing how the characters are all dead serious, but the events make it work as a great comedy,” Lu murmured by my side as she watched the frenetic cast run around the stage.
Charlie Chaplin, regarded by many as the king of comedy, once said, “Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long shot.” I couldn’t help but agree.
“Oh, the prince!”
Yoshino’s comment brought my attention back to the stage, where I saw a golden-haired young man offer his hand to the pauper protagonist, who had apparently fallen over. He definitely looked very prince-like to me.
“Are you okay, my dear? Can you stand?”
“Y-Yes, I can!”
The charming prince took the girl by the hand and helped her up.
Wow, I’ve seen a lot of princes, but whoever’s playing this guy is selling it super well right now.
Most of the women in the audience, as well as a couple of the men, were practically swooning at his charismatic performance. Thankfully, my wives weren’t so easily drawn in. They were used to being around royals.
But who’s playing this guy? Wait...
I narrowed my eyes.
“What?!”
“Wh-What is it, father?”
“N-No, nothing... Forget it... Sorry...”
My exclamation shocked Arcia, so I promptly apologized. I had suddenly realized who I was looking at.
It’s Theatro! He’s playing the prince! Incredible! This guy really is the god of theater... He’s encapsulating the role perfectly... He looks nothing like the gangly punk rocker he resembled last night... I know it’s a play, but he really is coming off as a different person entirely. He’s not just a character actor, he’s a full-on chameleon!
The Theatro on stage was the very image of a fairytale prince. He exuded kindness, reliability, bravery, and virtue. I couldn’t see him as anything other than the epitome of princeliness.
“He’s pretty different from our prince...”
Yoshino’s comment tore me out of my stupefied admiration.
...Our prince?
“Well yeah, our brother isn’t that kind of person.”
“He doesn’t train much either... He’s a little too casual if you ask me.”
I couldn’t help but lean in to hear what Quun and Frei were saying.
...Are they talking about my son?!
“He’s a true prince to Allis, though.”
“H-Huh?! I-I mean, he’s cool, isn’t he?! He’s a really cool prince!”
Elna teased Allis a little bit. Her cheeks had gone red. It was pretty obvious she had a thing for my son.
I could feel Ende’s glare boring into the back of my head.
...It’s not my fault. I didn’t do this!
“Hopefully Kuon shows up soon.”
“Please, I bet he’ll come as soon as he can. He loves being spoiled and doted on in the castle more than anything else.”
“Kuon?!” I couldn’t help but yell out in response to Linne and Arcia’s exchange.
Linne looked back at me and put her hand over her mouth. She realized she’d messed up. Still, the name she’d accidentally revealed had shocked the hell out of me. After all, it was a name I was intimately familiar with.
Linze, who was seated next to Linne, leaned over and whispered, “Is something wrong, Touya?”
“N-No, it’s just... Kuon... Kuon was my grandfather’s name.”
“Huh?!”
She seemed almost as startled by my confession as I was.
...So that’s it, huh? I named my boy after my grandpa... Mochizuki Kuon... It’s a good name. Yeah, of course it is. It’s already a tried and tested name, after all. It was good enough for my grandpa.
The only thing I was worried about now was if my son would end up as insane as my grandpa. Names and natures often aligned, after all. He’d probably call himself Kuon Brunhild on paper for diplomatic reasons, though.
“If you don’t follow the play, you’ll miss the story, you know? Pay attention.”
“Fine...”
I was about to ask more about my son, but Karen stopped me. She must’ve known my intentions...
I knew he was younger than Linne, my seventh kid...so that meant he was the eighth or ninth, which put him around five or six.
He’s only a little boy, but he’s out there all alone... I hope he’s okay. I know the girls say he’s a silver or gold adventurer already, but I can’t help but worry.
I started thinking about my son so much that I found it hard to concentrate on the rest of the play.
◇ ◇ ◇
The royal capital of the Kingdom of Elfrau, Slanien, was in the eastern portion of the country. The small town of Zelezny, unfortunately, was quite a distance away from it. The town wasn’t all that big, but it wasn’t a tiny village either. It was something of a layover town, one that wasn’t quite a city, but was still reasonably large. The land outside the town’s walls was covered in falling snow, but the streets themselves were fairly clear of it. That was because the entire place was enchanted with wards that warmed the air.
Most towns in Elfrau were enchanted with such wards, allowing the citizens to brave the bitter cold. They still needed coats, however. Everyone who lived here was dressed for wintry weather. The only person who stood out was the young boy, who was maybe five or six years old, who dressed as if he was going out for a spring picnic.
His clothes looked particularly well tailored, making it plain that he was from a well-to-do family, but his clothing wasn’t really suitable for the hostile, snowy environment. The people around him didn’t say much, but they couldn’t help but glance at him in confusion.
“Hey, young man. Aren’t you cold?”
“Mhm. I’m cold,” the boy replied. A curious store owner, who couldn’t help but reach out, had called out to him.
“Why are you dressed like that, then?”
“Can’t help it. Anywhere here that sells clothes?”
“Huh? Just down the street over there.”
“I see. Thank you kindly, sir,” the boy said and bowed before toddling away. He spoke in such a refined and courteous manner that the store owner could only assume he was of some noble origin.
The boy walked down the street until he saw a signpost for an armor store. Perhaps that was the one the man had mentioned before? It seemed to be more of a store for battle garments rather than regular clothing, however.
The boy rang the doorbell and walked inside. He saw armor aplenty, with various helmets and greaves and chest plates. There was no shortage of thick coats, heavy cloaks, and cozy-looking snow boots too.
There were a few customers, but nobody was manning the counter. And so, the boy called out to who he assumed must be the owner.
“Excuse me, sir?”
“Oh, hey there. Nice outfit you got there, sonny.”
His clothing once again drew attention, reminding the boy that he was very out of place.
“I’d actually like some warmer clothing, but I’m out of money right now.”
“We can’t just give stuff out for free, kid. We’re a business, not a charity.”
“I’m well aware of that. Would this do in lieu of currency?” the boy asked as he took off his cufflinks and set them down on the countertop. The man at the counter looked over the cufflinks before his eyes went wide in shock.
“Holy crap, kid. Is this orichalcum?!”
“That it is. Even orichalcum in this small amount should fetch me thirty gold coins per cufflink, yes?”
The shopkeep immediately recognized the value of the metal that had been brought to him. Orichalcum was a mythical metal. It was rarely found on the market, and even buyers who worked directly for the state had a hard time finding it. The shopkeeper recognized this orichalcum as the very same kind of metal he’d had the good fortune of handling once when he was a young man. It was the real deal.
The boy had valued each cufflink at thirty gold coins, but the shopkeeper’s awe made it seem far more valuable than that. That was probably because melting down the cufflinks and applying even a thin layer of coating to a piece of armor would create a very profitable item he could sell.
“Yeah... You win, kid. None of our winter clothes are worth this much, but I really want these cuffs. Mind if I go get you some money from the store safe?”
“Sure. I’d like to purchase a few other items as well, please.”
“Gotcha. Take a look around until I get back, then. The stuff in the back row has magic enchantments,” the shopkeeper said as he headed over to sort out his finances.
The boy turned to look at the warm clothing corner. Most of the items for sale were for adults, but there were a few things in his size. Some adventurers took their kids out with them, so presumably, the selection here was for them. However, the main issue the boy had was that none of the clothes really suited his tastes.
“Hmm... I guess this coat works best... It can withstand extreme temperatures on both ends, making it perfectly climate-controlled. Though it resembles father’s coat perhaps a tad too much...”
The boy didn’t want to dress up like his dad, so he ended up opting for a similar coat that came in black instead.
“I bet Allis’ll like this. My sisters will just tell me my fashion sense is bad as ever, though...” the boy sighed as he remembered how often his siblings would tease him. He wondered if they’d arrived in this era yet. So long as they hadn’t lost their phones like he had, they’d be able to easily reach their parents.
“Now, how am I to get to Brunhild from here, I wonder...?”
He knew there was no magic train between Elfrau and Brunhild, not yet at least, so his only options were likely to go on foot or via carriage. The Snow Wolf he’d ridden to this town would’ve drawn too much attention, so he’d released it. At the very least, Regulus wasn’t too far from Elfrau. If he kept moving, he could maybe make it there in a month.
“...Well, no rush,” the boy mumbled as he decided to make it home eventually. He saw no need to panic. He didn’t have the luxury of teleportation magic like some of his siblings, so he was content to just go at his own pace.
“That’s the coat sorted out, but I’ll need gloves and boots for Elfrau’s harsher areas,” he said to himself as he picked up some relatively cheap-looking clothing to finish off his ensemble. They weren’t the best, but they’d do. If he could use the spell [Warming], it’d have been less of a pressing issue, but the boy had no aptitude for Fire magic.
He and all his siblings had Null spells, but only four of them could use elemental spells alongside them. He didn’t have his phone, so he couldn’t trigger its [Storage] either. That meant he couldn’t access his backpack filled with all his stuff. And, unfortunately, this era was still prerevolution, which meant there weren’t storage cards being sold in every store.
His phone was locked and inaccessible to anyone other than him, so at least his things were safe...but that didn’t change the fact that there were important things in there. Hopefully his father would be able to sort it out once he returned to Brunhild.
Once he’d chosen what he wanted, he waited for the shopkeeper to return.
“Picked out everything you want?”
“I have.”
After deducting the cost of the clothing against the value of the cufflinks, the boy had a handful of silver remaining. He put them in a purse he’d just purchased. It was a simple horse skin bag, one that could be bound with a string. He tied it to his waist, put on the warmer clothing, and headed outside.
“That’s better. The trip should be a lot easier now. Let’s see, next I should...” before he finished speaking, the boy’s stomach started to rumble as if to remind him of something important.
“Oh yeah, I’m hungry.”
He hadn’t eaten anything since he’d landed in this time period. His smartphone [Storage] had a few snacks in it, but he couldn’t access that.
Fortunately, he had money now, so he began making his way to the town square to look for a bite to eat. But before he could do that, three men appeared from nowhere.
“Hey, kid. We saw you coming outta that shop with a pretty penny. Mind sharing?” the leader of the men, a young smirking man, said.
The boy looked a bit closer and recognized one of his aggressors as a customer from the store earlier. He must’ve been eavesdropping on the orichalcum transaction and set up this attack. The boy didn’t think that was especially nice of him.
“Give us the purse, now. No need to get yourself hurt.”
“No, I don’t think I will. I’ve no need to listen to common thieves,” the boy replied, seeming completely unintimidated. His indifference only served to enrage the men.
“Who’s a thief, huh?! You little brat!”
“What else would I call you? You’re the one demanding my money, are you not? Shall I call you a thug instead? Even a brat like myself can recognize you for what you are.”
“You little shit!” one of the men roared as he ran over and attempted to kick the boy.
“[Slip].”
“Whagh!”
The man slipped over and bashed his head into the stone pavement. He clutched at himself in agony as he rolled around on the floor, but the boy didn’t even so much as look his way.
“Tch! Don’t mess with us, kid!” another of the attackers exclaimed as he charged in, this time grabbing at the boy’s neck.
The boy simply placed his hand on the attacker’s arm and said, “[Paralyze].”
“Gwugh?!”
The man’s arm seized up, and then his entire body fell forward. It then began to lightly twitch and spasm. Anyone could tell his muscles weren’t working properly. Neither of the men knew what had hit them.
“I’m not exactly the most proficient at combat, since my sisters see more of it than I do. Still, I can’t exactly let you do as you please with me, now can I?”
“Wh-What are you, brat?! What do you think you’re doing?!”
“Hm? What am I doing? Taking care of criminals, I’d say.”
The man who’d bashed his head earlier screamed at the boy, but he simply responded by crouching down and paralyzing him as well. Just like his friend, his body began to spasm before falling still.
The last of the men standing couldn’t believe his eyes. This was meant to be a simple job, some easy money. They just had to scare a kid into handing his cash over, so why were his friends down for the count? Why was this kid so insanely strong?
“Hey, mister. Do you know if I’ll get a cash reward for handing you in?”
“Ugh!”
“Ah...”
The young man turned tail and fled. He had a horrible feeling in the pit of his stomach. This brat wasn’t just any brat. He was something more. He was something...wrong.
“You’re not going anywhere.”
“What?!”
The boy’s right eye changed into a slightly murky, yellow-gold color. The moment that shining gaze cast itself upon the man...he froze in place.
He could breathe. He could move his eyes, just barely, but his body wouldn’t move. His body wasn’t paralyzed, though. He was still suspended in place, still frozen halfway through his running. Time had stopped for the man. It was as if he was trapped in suspended animation.
“...If I blink, you’ll unfreeze, so let me [Paralyze] you.”
“Ngh!” the man groaned as he fell to the ground. It had only taken a moment for three adults to be completely incapacitated by a boy who only seemed to be five or six.
“Now then...how shall I deal with these thieves?”
Typically, when dealing with criminals, it was a simple matter of hauling them to the local authorities. However, if he took these people to the local knights, he’d probably have to answer a bunch of questions. And if he told them his true identity, they wouldn’t believe him at all. He was hungry too, so he had no time to waste on simple matters of criminal justice, which was why he settled on a compromise. The men hadn’t been too violent, so he decided they could go free.
“But...” he mumbled as he dragged the three men over to the shade of a nearby tree and snatched up their purses. He didn’t want to take their money for himself, but he did want to teach them a lesson.
“My, you have a nice bit of money here... Why would you try to take from me when you could’ve fed yourselves just fine?” the boy asked as he dumped out their purses into the street. Most of the coins were copper, but there were a few silvers as well.
The three men could only watch, screaming in silence, as their precious money was tossed off.
“Let’s hope some good people find this money, eh? Perhaps they’ll bring it to the knights and you can recover it later. Or maybe there won’t be any left at all by the time your paralysis wears off, hm?” the little boy with the angelic face and the devilish eyes, Mochizuki Kuon, smiled wide.
It didn’t matter what their motivations were. Thieves didn’t deserve human rights or civil liberties. That was what his father and mothers had taught him. If his sisters were here, they’d have chastised him for going too easy on these men, even.
He took their armor and weapons for good measure, tossing them into the street as well.
Kuon’s stomach rumbled. He was really, really hungry.
“Ah... It’ll no doubt pale in comparison to what Mother Lu can conjure up, but I hope I find something nice,” the boy said as he began to walk through the snowy town.
The three men were later rescued, mere moments before the cold claimed their lives. They shivered, shook, and cried about seeing a demon. But once the knights investigated them, their testimonies were deemed unreasonable and they were imprisoned on charges they’d been avoiding. And, of course, they never reclaimed a single coin they lost that day.
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