Grimgal of Ashes and Illusion - Volume 14 - Chapter 16

16. Sound Arguments Can be Pretty Lame [sentimentalism]

“...Shihoru?” Haruhiro blinked two, three times despite himself.

He’d had a feeling since before he’d finished climbing this hill, which might not be a hill, but he had nothing better to call it, so he had no choice but to keep calling it a hill, that there was something shining on top of it.

Having climbed up here, lo and behold, there was a shining humanoid figure. It was clear at a glance that the figure was female. For a moment, he had mistaken her for being naked.

Her body was slathered with a gleaming paint-like substance, and his first impression was that this girl might be a little strange.

This being Parano, he thought maybe this was acceptable here, but when he noticed the woman in question resembled one of his comrades, he could only assume she actually was Shihoru, and that changed things.

“That’s you, right? No... I have the wrong person? Or... do I?” he asked awkwardly.

The woman was bawling her eyes out about five, maybe six meters from where Haruhiro was. She was probably looking at Haruhiro—or she should have been, but though she seemed to be looking, she also seemed not to be.

She was shedding tears. If you could call that substance, which looked like a powder made from crushing stars, tears, that is.

Those sparkling tears ran down her cheeks, some of it adhering to her breasts and lower body, while the rest pooled at her feet.

The woman with Shihoru’s face opened both eyes, her lips formed the shape made when producing an “oo” sound, but she said nothing and did nothing but cry. She didn’t budge. Everything but her sparkling tears was frozen, so she looked like a statue of a woman, made with even more attention to detail than Ahiru’s statues of Yonaki Uguisu.

What was going on here? His head wasn’t working, and his mind couldn’t keep up.

A whole lot of things had happened at once. He’d figured getting far away from Mimic’s Town before sorting each of them out would be prudent.

Had that been a mistake? No, it couldn’t have been. Because it wasn’t just Kuzaku; Setora and a tiger he could only assume was Kiichi, along with Enba for some reason, and Merry, oh, Merry, Merry was safe, too.

Even if the whole gang wasn’t back together, he’d been able to meet up with some of his comrades.

In addition, though he hadn’t talked to them, so he didn’t know their full situation yet, the woman called Io and her two male flunkies might have been members of the Io-sama Squad, which was a part of the Day Breakers.

What were they doing in Parano? Well, whatever it was, it looked like they wouldn’t be hostile.

Mimic was shut up in Ruins No. 4 and wasn’t coming out, but he’d decided that it was probably best to climb the hill anyway, to be safe.

It seemed to have been the right choice.

The whole gang had assembled.

“Oh, hey,” Haruhiro murmured.

That’s right. The whole gang’s here. Yeah. Well, then. That was just perfect, isn’t it?

“Shihoru, I dunno what’s going on with you, but stop crying, and come—”

“Wait.” Alice pulled on his sleeve.

When he turned to look, the one who looked like a paladin from the Io-sama Squad—Tonbe, was it?—had made his hand mirror grow to a massive size, and was sheltering Io and the other man, who was dressed all in black and had a long chin, behind it.

Setora and the others were still climbing the hill. Ahiru took his belt out of his pants.

“That woman, she’s a trickster,” said Alice.

“...Huh?”

Tri...?

What?

Trickster?

Huh?

Who is?

Alice’s shovel peeled. Its skin began to envelope Haruhiro and Alice.

“Whoa, hey!” Ahiru jumped towards them.

Alice didn’t force him out.

The moment before the skin fully covered Alice, Haruhiro, and Ahiru, he saw the puddle of sparkling tears at Shihoru’s—yes, that was Shihoru—feet spin upwards, and blow towards them. He felt a chill.

Alice’s shovel was already protecting them. Still, this felt like nothing if not bad news.

Snap, snap, snap, snap, snap, snap! The noises started. They were being attacked. What kind of attack was it?

“Urgh...” Alice groaned while holding the main body of the faintly glowing meat stick that was the shovel.

Haruhiro hurriedly hugged Alice. Resonance. I am already Alice. It’s numbing, kind of. Is this... pain? It’s like being pinched. Like small, but powerful hands are pinching me a few hundred places at once. It’s incredibly unpleasant. What’s going on here? That trickster. What is this power? It’s hard to say, not being able to see out from inside here. Have to bear it for now. Have to wait it out.

The pressure’s letting up.

The attack, it’s stopped.

Releasing the skin immediately, they kicked Ahiru out.

“Ow!”

Ignoring Ahiru, who had landed flat on his ass, they observed the trickster.

She’s still crying. Those sparkling tears are suspicious. My shovel’s hurt pretty badly. The skin’s a wreck. If they can do that to my shovel, they’re not playing around.

Is that someone you know, Haruhiro? A friend... A comrade?

She’s fallen, become a trickster.

“Wha—Shihoru-san...” There was a voice from behind.

Alice glanced in that direction. That guy, huh? Kuzaku, was it? Looks like he just crested the hill. He saw that woman, and he’s shocked about it.

“Get back!” Alice called. “There’s no helping her now.”

“N-No helping her—Wait, what does that mean...?”

“Exactly what it sounds like.”

It’s the same as with Nui.

Haruhiro, you tried to save Nui. Right? You’ve become me through Resonance, so you’re hearing this, right? The ego that’s the source of magic, and the id that makes people fall into darkness and become tricksters, are deeply connected to our hearts. You might even say that they are our hearts. If you could go inside a person, maybe you might be able to find some sort of clue. That’s what you thought, right?

It’s not that you failed. You really did save her. Nui found salvation. Not in the form you had hoped for, maybe, but she did.

Besides, nothing good comes from living, anyway. You’ll be happy or fortunate sometimes, but that’s just a momentary thing. Every happiness will fade with time, and you can’t experience it all that often, either. Or you grow accustomed to it. Like drugs. You feel good when you use them, but then you develop resistance. If you just up the dose and take more, and more, and more each time, you eventually wreck your body, or you overdose and bite it that way.

It’s nothing but boredom, stupidity, suffering, pain, and loneliness. That’s all living is. What is this “life is wonderful” stuff? Anyone singing humanity’s praises can eat shit. If living doesn’t bring you to despair, you’re blind, or an idiot without the mental capacity for proper thought. The clever ones, they use all sort of tricks to distract themselves from the abject lack of hope. They forget it’s all meaningless, and focus on the pleasure in front of them. Working little by little toward some goal, fulfilling their curiosity, moving their bodies, trying to move up in the world, playing around, having sex. It’s because if they don’t do those things, they can’t bear it.

There is no meaning in life. We were just born as a result of sexual reproduction. Whether we live or die, nothing changes. Nothing is gained, nothing lost. The total amount of mass in the universe is the same. When entropy increases, even the things we’ve worked so desperately to leave behind will be unable to maintain their forms. Nihilism isn’t a belief, a stance, or an attitude. It’s the plain truth.

Nui was released from the meaninglessness of life.

Congratulations, Nui.

Thank you, Haruhiro.

That’s why you have to accept what I’m about to do.

Shihoru, was it?

We’re going to save her.

Let’s set her free together.

(You mean... kill her?)

She’s crying, isn’t she? Do you want to make her cry forever?

(No, but... there must be some way...)

There isn’t. Not that I know of, at least. What about you? Any ideas?

(Well... No, but...)

We’ll save her. Like Nui. I’ll draw her attention somehow. While I do, you grab on to her. Once you use Resonance to attune yourself, I’m sure you can figure out the rest. Just do what you did for Nui.

Well, she’s your comrade, and your friend, so maybe it’s hard? Then why not think of it this way? She might not necessarily end up like Nui. If you try it again, it might work out this time. I think death was what Nui really wished for, after all.

Now, this girl? I don’t know her. Maybe she’s been crying like that all along. She just didn’t let you see it. That’s just like Nui, isn’t it? Don’t you think she wants to be set free?

If you could somehow become her using Resonance, and you found the answer to that, could you bring her back? If her wish and what you want yourself is different, what will you do? Can you force your desires on her? Is that right?

“...I don’t care what’s right!” Haruhiro separated from Alice.

Shihoru was still crying.

Why are you crying, Shihoru? he thought frantically. I don’t know. Even though we’re comrades. I have no idea why Shihoru would cry.

“Kuzaku!” he shouted. “Draw Shihoru’s attention!”

“Whuh?! H-How?!”

“Anything goes!”

“You can say that, but... Aw, screw it, fine! Shihoru-san, look...!”

You never really know what people are going to do.

Even when you’re comrades, you don’t know what you don’t know, and maybe there are some things you don’t need to know.

Kuzaku moved faster than the eye could follow.

He stripped off his armor. He was used to doing that, but this was still bizarrely fast. He then tore off most the other stuff he was wearing so quickly that it might actually have gotten torn apart.

“Hungh...!”

Kuzaku raised both hands, his right in a knife-like position, and his left flexed to show off his biceps. He put his weight on his left leg, and only the toes of his right foot were touching the ground.

Was it some kind of pose? That wasn’t clear, but they were intense. The muscles, that was.

Man, my initial impression that he was tall and lanky hasn’t changed, but Kuzaku isn’t just tall—he’s got a pretty good body, too, right? I think he’s got more muscle on him than the average guy. But still.

He wasn’t like that before, right?

I have a feeling he’s gotten more buff than before. He wasn’t that buff, right?

The width of his chest, it’s impossible. Those pecs are insane, but what is with those lats? They’re like wings! Is that what they call a V-taper? No, no, can you even get like that? With a human body? You can’t, right? Those abs are intense, too, you know? They’re ripped like crazy, like a six pack! He’s built all that muscle, yet still maintains a V-taper? I mean, what? Those traps, next to his neck? They’re mountains. Mountains! You can’t get built like that, not normally.

I don’t even have to mention his arms. Okay, maybe I do. They’re thick. Those aren’t arms, they’re legs. No, his legs are even more insane, I know. If I had to some all of it up in a word, he’s huge.

Too huge.

His height probably hasn’t changed, but he’s a giant.

A muscle giant.

What’s more, he’s almost completely naked.

What is going on?

What’s happened to make things turn out like this?

Where did the Kuzaku I knew go?! Haruhiro wanted to shout. Give him back! I want the Kuzaku who wasn’t a muscular giant back. Please!

He said, “Look,” so I looked, but I don’t wanna see this. Still, I’m looking. I mean, who couldn’t? You kind of have to. It’s beyond amazing.

It wasn’t just Haruhiro. Everyone was doing the same.

Shihoru’s eyes were wide, and her mouth was gaping.

She wasn’t crying.

Those sparkling tears had stopped.

I ended up having to see something kind of incredible, but well done, Kuzaku. Your sacrifice... Is this a sacrifice? You seem to be pretty proud, showing off like that? Well, anyway, it won’t be in vain.

That said, Haruhiro couldn’t rush it. Letting his heart slip into the ground, he used Stealth. Then, while avoiding standing directly in front of Shihoru, he went as fast as he could, but without rushing, as he approached.

He wasn’t going to think, This is my only chance, so I have to do it now, no matter what. He could be pretty good at this sort of mental self-control.

About two meters left.

One meter.

Kuzaku was nearly stark naked, but so was Shihoru. If he touched the sparkling tears that had attached to certain parts of Shihoru’s body and were not entirely failing to hide them, what would happen?

He had his worries, but Shihoru seemed fine, and there was no turning back now. At the very end, he cast aside all reason, and jumped on her.

“Shihoru...!”