Chapter 7, Episode 53: Self-Awareness and Making Changes
Once he’d returned from Gimul, Ryoma called his goblins to a meeting and gave them directions as he took a snack.
“Got it?” he asked the goblins.
“Gob!” they answered.
Then Ryoma went straight to bed and tried to get some rest... But he couldn’t sleep. Through firefighting, rescuing, healing, and tracking down kidnappers, Ryoma had run all over the city casting all sorts of magic all day. Having synced his senses with his slimes frequently, he was physically and mentally exhausted.
But his eyelids did not grow heavy—all sorts of thoughts still whirled in his mind. Even when he occasionally dozed off, he was soon awake again.
I can’t sleep.
Ryoma stood from his bed. He grabbed a cup and a small bag from his nightstand, then scooped a spoonful of brown powder from the bag and into the cup. He boiled some water with magic and poured it in.
“Phew... Good thing I had this ready.”
This was an herbal concoction. It had been a favorite of Ryoma’s since his time on Earth. It was a blend of roasted dandelion root, wormwood, ginkgo leaves, and a few other plants. He had managed to find the ingredients necessary to recreate it.
I always used to... Uh-oh. I’ve been doing this a lot lately.
Ryoma caught himself thinking of his previous life more and more frequently of late. It didn’t happen every day, but whenever he had a sleepless night like this, he thought about his life on Earth. Everyone reminisced about their past, though, and Ryoma attributed the cause of his wandering mind to his exhaustion. This usually didn’t bother him, but today was a little different.
“Three days before the end of the year, you might find clarity when you’re alone in the abandoned mine,” Serelipta had once told him.
“Is this what he meant?” Ryoma mused aloud. The idea only gave him more questions. What clarity might he find about his past? What was unclear to him? Why? Was he thinking of the past in search of some clarity, or did he need clarity about something that had happened in the past? His thoughts were all over the place, and his tiredness was no help.
Ryoma sat on the bed, sipped on his herbal tea, and contemplated. Why did Serelipta tell me that, anyway...? He even went to the trouble of making sure the other gods couldn’t hear him tell me. Knowing Serelipta’s free-spirited nature, Ryoma knew one thing for sure: the answer wasn’t simple. Still, he felt a bizarre sense of trust in Serelipta—he somehow knew that the mischievous god wouldn’t lie to him about something like this. As Ryoma continued to try and wrangle his wandering mind, he suddenly laughed. I can’t figure it out! he thought. But that’s okay. Even though I’m thinking about the past, I know it’s in the past. There’s no doubt that I’m happy with my life right now. I have food, shelter, and more than enough money to get by, with plenty of income from adventuring and my businesses in the city. Not only do I have a cushy life in that way, I feel fulfilled about my slime projects. I’ve come to know a lot of people, and the vast majority of them are very nice. How could I not be happy?
Even as he sipped another mouthful of herbal tea, he remembered how he had gathered the ginkgo leaves with the young adventurer Beck. On the shelf by his bed, he could see the stone he had been given by Nikki, the boy he had come to know during his trip to Fatoma.
Ryoma’s room held plenty of other tokens that reminded him of the connections he had made with others. Back in the forest of Gana, Ryoma had still had plenty of things, but they had all been made by him. He had been self-sufficient—in an isolated loop of existence.
“Wait, that makes me sound like some loner,” he said. “I still had my slimes back then, so I wasn’t exactly alone... Maybe I shouldn’t equate slimes to human company, though. That makes me sound like even more of a pathetic loner.”
Having lived alone for the majority of his adult life on Earth, Ryoma had formed a habit of talking to himself. Now, perhaps aided by his sleeplessness, he seemed giddier than usual about it.
I never thought I could have a life like this... I thought things like this only happened in light novels, or literal dreams... Is this what Serelipta meant? He considered. Did he need clarity about how he appreciated his current life? That could make sense. If I were dreaming, and if I could go back to Earth by waking up...I wouldn’t want to wake up.
Ryoma recalled how he had first met Gain and the other gods. When they had explained how he had died on Earth, Ryoma hadn’t cared if he was dreaming or not. That’s how little attachment he’d had to his life on Earth, and his willingness to accept his new life in this new world had ultimately led him to where he was today.
There was no hope or future on Earth. Like I was dropped into the middle of the ocean where I’d drown if I stopped swimming. I guess it always could have been worse, but I was terrified of any little thing going wrong. Every time Ryoma had watched the news or seen articles online about a new criminal, he couldn’t help but feel like he would be featured on them one day. Not that he would have defended those criminals, but Ryoma had been saddened by the comments against the criminals, almost as if they had been personal attacks on himself.
Before he’d known it, particular thoughts had begun lurking in the back of his mind: wouldn’t it be easier if his life just ended? While he wouldn’t have chosen to take his own life, he’d always felt like the world would’ve been better off the quicker he was gone from it...
Grinding on my body and mind just to preserve my life, for whatever it was worth...
Now, Ryoma remembered what Orest, the young owner of a slave-trading company, had told him. “You seemed like a man who finally grasped a treasure you’ve longed for for years. Someone like that wouldn’t want to lose their treasure again. I felt like, subconsciously, you are trying to be the good boy who obediently listens to everything adults tell him... You seem very happy but very confined.”
Ryoma chuckled to himself. “He hit it right on the mark... I get it now. When life was smooth sailing, surrounded by kind people, I’d felt like I had really been reborn from the inside out—but my mind hadn’t really changed at all.”
Although anyone who overheard him might’ve thought the sentiment was pessimistic, Ryoma could not have been more at peace. At last, he had a genuine smile on his face.
By the time he’d finished his herbal tea, the tornado of thoughts had gone away. He turned to finally return to his bed and the promise of blissful sleep...when a stone slime hidden along the perimeter of his home notified Ryoma of a group coming towards him.
“Clarity, huh... Now I get it. I’m still going to make everyone worry about me, though.” Even as he said so, Ryoma had a smile on his face. He reached for the katana by his bed. Although his physical condition was far from perfect, he was glowing with energy more powerful than he had ever felt before.
■ ■ ■
Clouds obscured the moon and the stars; no light shone on the snow that piled on the path between the mines and the city of Gimul. A dark force, thirty-two in all, was approaching the remote home. Thirty of them carried boxes on their backs as they marched on warily. The other two were clad in thick armor and carried zweihanders on their backs, but they walked through the woods as if they had no weight on them at all.
Just as the conspicuous group reached the foot of the mountain, a voice began to echo around them. “Uh... Testing, testing. Can you hear me? This is Ryoma Takebayashi. Uh... To those coming my way through the forest now... You’re here to kill me, right? I’m not going anywhere, so hurry it up already. I’m right here.” Then a series of lights illuminated part of the abandoned mine, revealing the entrance where the fruits of the mine had once been stored to await transfer. Now torches encircled the area to show Ryoma standing in the middle of it.
“Turn them on!” one of the intruders calmly ordered. All of the men, clad in black, reached for the boxes on their backs and activated their magical items.
“There’s no sense in hiding—” Ryoma’s announcement was cut short as magical energy pulsed from the boxes and canceled out the Wind magic that was delivering Ryoma’s voice to them.
The silence in the forest was short-lived, as another command came from one of the intruders. “Hurry!”
Part of the group hurried ahead, resolved to sacrifice themselves to activate any traps along the way, just to deliver the others to their target as quickly as possible. But nothing came of their sacrificial charge—the entire group soon came face-to-face with Ryoma without encountering any booby traps or deterrents whatsoever. Ryoma hadn’t moved a step since he showed himself to them, still standing in the center of a circular patch of neatly trimmed lawn where the snow had been melted off of. This put the intruders on guard even more.
“Welcome,” Ryoma said. “Well, not really. Just to make sure, won’t you surrender?”
“Ha! Don’t you understand what’s happening?” one of them countered.
“I always knew you’d be coming after me,” said Ryoma. “I was told to run if something like this happened...but I can’t afford to have you attack the city too. So I made the executive decision to take care of you here and now.” Ryoma’s declaration could have triggered an instant battle.
However, the armored pair heartily laughed. “Ha! Amusing, isn’t it, Brother?” one of them asked.
“Indeed, Brother. He wants a fair fight against us, does he?”
Drawing their swords—which were as long as they were tall—the pair marched forward. Some of the others moved to stop them. “Wait, this could be a trap.”
“Stay back,” one of the brothers said. “It is our job to deal with him.”
“Keep watch on our surroundings...and any stealthier tactics than this.”
“Just the two of you?” Ryoma asked.
“Apparently, you’ve caused a lot of headaches,” said one of the armored warriors. “We’ve been told to wait until you’re spent from running around the city. To kill you at all cost.”
“Those behind us are mostly there to fend off any unwanted intrusions.”
“Went to a lot of trouble to take on a lone kid,” Ryoma said. “I’m assuming they’re stopping me from using magic too.”
“We scoffed at the idea at first,” the warrior said. “But now that we’re face-to-face... Brother?”
“I think this will be far more interesting than we’d thought, brother. Quite impressive that he stands his ground. Even more intriguing that he probably has the strength to back it up.”
Ryoma let out a sigh. “This would have been so much easier if you were the type to come charging at me carelessly, thinking I’d be an easy kill...”
“We’ve done our research,” one of the brothers said. “Surely you know why we are being thorough.”
“I have a few reasons in mind...but I’ve been too busy lately, so I’m not sure which thing you’re talking about. You’ve already shut off my magic, so are you talking about the time I beat up those delinquent adventurers? That can’t be enough... Wait, am I doing that trope where a character’s so powerful he doesn’t realize that he’s causing trouble?”
“Whatever that means, we wouldn’t be this careful if you’d only disciplined those punks.”
“The bandits in the forest of Gana,” the other man added.
“Were they your comrades?” Ryoma asked.
“Not exactly. We often walk in the wilderness to hide from prying eyes. Underground guilds share information on hidden pathways frequented by their members. According to our intel, a lot of bandits have vanished around the forest of Gana.”
“Knowing that you lived in the forest and cashed in on their bounty, it seems natural to assume that you were responsible for their downfall. Besides, with the kind of energy you’re exuding now, even an untrained eye could see how you are ready to fight.”
The calm exchange belied the intensity of the moment. The men in black—who had both committed murder and come back from the brink of death themselves more times than they could count—couldn’t help but shudder at Ryoma’s aura. Otherwise, they would have tried to kill him already. They might have been given orders only to ward off intrusions, but there was no reason not to take an opening if one presented itself.
“Strange,” said one brother. “This child could not have been alive for more than a quarter of our lives, and he seems like nothing if not a seasoned warrior.”
“We’ve killed countless such warriors before, but I’ve never faced one as young as you who hasn’t cried for mercy by the time we’ve drawn our swords. Answer this before we kill you. Why face us alone? Do you not fear us? Fear death?”
“Well...I know it’s not the smartest decision,” Ryoma said. “I can’t help sticking my nose in, though. I’ve always messed up because of that. Made people mad. I’ve tried over and over again to curb this habit, but...here we are. Back in the forest, there was no sense in begging nature or a wild beast for mercy. And I have already died before...”
“Died?”
“What are you going on about?”
The brothers sound irritated, taking Ryoma’s answer for a joke, or at least a sign that he wasn’t going to engage in earnest conversation.
“Think of it as a metaphor,” Ryoma said. “I know what it’s like to live a life you think is worse than death...and now I feel fulfilled. If I died here and now, I’d have no regrets. I used to say that too, but for a different reason. Hey, death won’t be so bad if I can hang out with those gods afterwards.” Ryoma was smiling. “Of course, though, the main reason I’m not afraid is because I have no intention of dying. I like Gimul, and I’m not going to make people who care about me cry over me.”
“Unfortunately, that’s not an option. We have our mission, and we will complete it. If you didn’t want to sadden those people, you should have run.”
“No. If he wanted to prevent us from attacking the city, this was the best choice.”
Ryoma kept his smile. “You’re still assuming you’re going to win. I hate to tell you this, since you brought out all of those magical items to cut off my magic, but, well...I prefer swordplay to magic, if I’m being honest.”
“Then show us what you can do with it. We are the Greatsword Brothers.”
“No one has faced us and survived.”
For the first time, the brothers set foot in the turfed arena. In the blink of an eye, they sped up unnaturally, suddenly flanking Ryoma from either side.
The battle to the death began without warning.
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