Damn Reincarnation - Chapter 623

In the early morning hours, Ciel woke up in her bed. There was still time left before the sun began to rise, but Ciel was used to waking up at this hour.

She sat up in bed, rolling her neck a few times, and then, after placing her feet together in front of her, she stretched her upper body forward. After she was done with that, Ciel got out of bed and lightly stretched her body as she loosened her joints. Then she drank a glass of water that had been placed beside the bed before washing her face, brushing her teeth, and changing into a new set of clothes.

Stepping out of her room, Ciel quietly closed the door behind her. Most people were still asleep at this hour. She silently walked down the hallways that were kept illuminated with dimmed lights. Getting up and leaving her room at this hour was all part of Ciel’s daily routine.

Even during her childhood, Ciel had never once slacked off in her training, working hard to prove that she deserved to be born into the main line of the Lionheart clan. Back when the eldest son, Eward Lionheart — whose name was now forbidden even to be mentioned — had held the right to succeed the family, Ciel had been driven to fight for her mother’s approval and their position in the family. But then....

“So what if all of our hard work was aimed in the wrong direction,” Ciel muttered with a pout as she walked down the quiet hallway.

It hadn’t just been her. From a young age, both the twins had been hard workers, and it wasn’t just for the sake of their mother’s approval and their position in the main family. When they were thirteen years old, in the now-defunct Lionheart tradition that was the Bloodline Continuation Ceremony, they had competed against Eugene, who had shown them that an overwhelming gap existed between him and them before he was adopted into the main family. No, rather than competing....

At that time, they were only thirteen years old. Meeting him at such a young age, the twins couldn’t help but hold complicated feelings toward Eugene — a descendant of a collateral line who was far superior to those from the main line.

If he had simply remained a part of the collateral lines, there wouldn’t have been much for the twins to worry about, but Eugene had then become a foster child of the main family. Fortunately, Ancilla had a keen eye for reading the wind, so she chose not to show any hostility towards Eugene. She had sat the young twins down in front of her and told them they needed to become a real family to Eugene.

The fact that they had seen Eugene’s skills firsthand during the Bloodline Continuation Ceremony also served as a blessing for the twins.

Cyan had instinctively been drawn to Eugen’s strength. Boys at that age tended to admire those stronger than themselves and wanted to become friends with them. But Cyan didn’t just want to become friends; he wanted to become true brothers, and his pride as a noble young master made him want to catch up with Eugene no matter how hard he had to work for it.

Ciel also felt similarly. However, unlike Cyan, Ciel was a girl. For Ciel, who had only ever lived in the main house, which was filled with her blood-related family members, Eugene’s sudden intrusion into their lives at such a young age had left her unable to hold anything more than a vague perception of him as a family member or a sibling.

There had been too many missed opportunities: if only the awkward feelings brought about by her puberty had been less intense or if Eugene hadn’t gone to study abroad in Aroth. Or maybe if she had followed Eugene instead of becoming a Black Lion or if she had only acknowledged her feelings early on and confessed them to Eugene... if she had just made any type of concentrated effort.

Ciel laughed bitterly, “There’s still no way it would have worked out.”

If it had been in the past when she hadn’t known the full circumstances, Ciel might have believed otherwise, but the current Ciel now knew a lot more about Eugene. No matter in which direction Ciel might have chosen to devote her efforts, she still wouldn’t have been able to receive the desired answer from Eugene.

For Eugene, the past was something he would never be able to cast off, whether it was his connection to his comrades, his emotions accumulated in that life, or his unfulfilled regrets. No matter how desperately Ciel confessed her love to him, Ciel’s feelings wouldn’t have been able to reach Eugene.

No matter how pretty the clothes she wore, no matter how many times she swung her sword in the training grounds every morning, no matter how much stronger she became as a result of all that, these efforts still wouldn’t be able to grant Ciel the response that she so desperately desired.

Even now, after the war had completely ended... that was still the case. Ciel wanted to become so much stronger because she wanted to fight alongside Eugene. Whether it was against the Demon King of Incarceration or the Demon King of Destruction, she had wanted to do her part in those battles and be of help to Eugene.

But the distance between them had proved far too great. She hadn’t been able to catch up to him in time. Ciel’s only significant contribution during those battles was to use her Demoneye of Darkness to summon Molon.

In the battle against the Demon King of Incarceration, she had defeated many demonfolk and demonic beasts. In the battle against the Demon King of Destruction, she had also brought down many of the Nur. But that was all she had managed.

Ciel still hadn’t been able to stand on the same battlefield as Eugene. In both battles, Ciel’s position had always been the same. She had only fought on the battlefields that were far away from the Demon Kings. So she had been left with no choice but to wait while hoping that Eugene would return after slaying the Demon Kings.

“Phew,” Ciel let out a deep sigh.

The war was over. And there wouldn’t be another such war for hundreds of years from now. No, even if a war did break out somewhere on the continent, there wouldn’t be any need for Eugene to be there, so naturally, that meant Ciel also wouldn’t get another chance to fight alongside him.

Yet even so, Ciel still woke up in the early hours of the morning every day, changed her clothes, and headed out to the training grounds.... Was it because of her many regrets?

Did she perhaps still harbor some faint hope? Was it a desire to become stronger regardless of the situation? Or was it simply out of habit? Even Ciel herself didn’t know the exact reason for her behavior. She just naturally woke up at this time without even meaning to, and when she tried to go back to sleep, her sleep was uneasy, and if she skipped her early morning training, her body felt heavy....

So was it just because of habit in the end?

Ciel headed towards the stairs with a wry smile on her face.

“Hm? Ciel hummed, sensing a presence in the study near the hallway.

With a little bit of focus, she was able to detect the identity of that presence, so instead of heading down the stairs, she first walked over to the study.

In the Lionheart’s main estate, even a study boasted a size comparable to a small library. Vermouth was standing near a bookshelf as he read a book instead of sitting down to read it. He raised his head as he heard the sound of gentle knocking coming from the door.

“Please, come in,” Vermouth called out.

Ciel carefully cracked open the door and peeked her head through the gap.

She blinked her eyes bashfully as she looked at Vermouth, then she grinned and said, “Hello Uncle[1].”

“Haaah...,” Vermouth let out a long sigh at this playful greeting. He shook his head and muttered, “I still can’t get used to that title.”

“Isn’t it better than calling you Father? Or perhaps, would you prefer to be called Grandfather instead?” Ciel cheekily asked.

“It would be better if you could just call me by my name,” Vermouth requested resignedly.

“There’s no way I could do something like that,” Ciel said, shaking her head. “You are the Founding Ancestor of the Lionheart clan, after all, Uncle.”

“But you calling me Uncle still feels a little...,” Vermouth trailed off awkwardly.

“Since the Patriarch doesn’t have any older brothers, there’s no one else who I can call Uncle[2]. Besides, doesn’t me calling you that truly make us feel like family?” Ciel said with a giggle as she stepped into the study.

Following the dinner they had shared a week ago, Carmen had been calling Vermouth her Father while Ciel had been addressing him as Uncle.

“Am I perhaps bothering you?” Ciel politely asked.

“Not at all,” Vermouth assured her.

“Are you having trouble sleeping? Or maybe, is there anything about the main estate that’s making you uncomfortable...?” Ciel cautiously inquired.

“No, it’s nothing like that. I usually don’t sleep much...,” Vermouth admitted as he held up the book he was reading, “...and there are a lot of interesting books here.”

The book Vermouth was holding summarized the history of the Lionheart clan, and it had never been circulated outside of the family. Ciel’s eyes sparkled with interest. As a descendant of the main family, Ciel had naturally read that book several times from a young age.

Vermouth hesitated for a few more moments before eventually continuing in the most polite tone he could manage. “He said that he didn’t want to listen to the orders of some scrub who was weaker than he was.”

“Ahaha!” Ciel couldn’t help but burst into laughter at these words, clutching her sides as she doubled over. “So even in the past, he still had the same trashy personality that he has now?”

“I think that he’s actually become much gentler nowadays. After he became a member of our party, Sienna and Anise were always trying to beat Hamel’s personality into shape...,” Vermouth said with a smile as he looked at Ciel. “Being reincarnated and having to start a new life may also be responsible for the changes in Hamel’s personality. I could never have imagined that Hamel would actually be willing to kneel down in front of his father.”

“Um, that’s for sure,” Ciel agreed. “When I first met Eugene when I was younger, he was even more of a jerk than he is now.”

“And how did that go?” Vermouth asked.

Ciel shook her head and said, “After my brother teased him a little, Eugene immediately challenged him to a duel. My brother got knocked down in a single hit and was made to cry while throwing up.”

Just like Vermouth, Ciel was also able to remember her very first meeting with Eugene clearly.

As he was watching Ciel giggle at the memory with one hand over her mouth, Vermouth asked, “Do you like Hamel?”

Ciel’s laughter came to a sudden stop. She blinked her eyes a few times as she stared back at Vermouth.

The silence was short-lived.

“Yes,” Ciel responded without even the slightest hesitation.

Ciel still regretted not trying to get just that little bit closer to Eugene in the past. Even though she knew that, even if she did return to the past, she still wouldn’t be able to close the distance between them. But as Vermouth had said, everyone has regrets to a certain extent, but there was no way to redo what had happened in the past.

“I know that I won’t be able to get the answer I want from him. However, I don’t want to give up. If I give up...,” Ciel paused before continuing. “If I give up, then I think I will just regret it even more later on.”

Ciel still woke up every morning to swing her sword as if out of habit.

“No matter how much stronger I get by continuing to swing my sword, I will never be able to catch up to Eugene,” Ciel admitted. “But even though I may only ever be able to keep chasing Eugene’s back, I will still keep swinging my sword from now on.”

Because if she kept swinging her sword until the sun had fully risen, Eugene, who had finally woken up from his sleep, would walk over to talk to her.

Ciel loved those moments.

“I don’t want to fall behind where I can’t even see his back. No matter how far out of reach he might be, I still want to be able to keep up with him. That way... if I can just do that, there might be times when Eugene turns around to look back at me,” Ciel said, self-consciously blinking her eyes, but surprisingly, there was no sign of tears. “No, I’ll keep following him so desperately that he has no choice but to turn and look back.”

Instead of feeling sad, Ciel surprisingly felt relieved. The gloomy feeling that had been hovering over her before she had entered the study had disappeared.

Ciel smiled and said, “Uncle, do you think I’m being stupid?”

“There’s no way I would think that,” Vermouth said, shaking his head, a faint smile also on his face. “Ciel. There is no reason to laugh at you for holding on to your wish. After all, doing so just means that you never gave up or gave into despair, isn’t that right?”

“Maybe it’s because I got slapped for doing so in the past,” Ciel said with a grin as she rubbed her cheek.[4]

A faint ray of light streamed in from the window near the desk. Ciel glanced out the window to see that the sun had already risen at some point during their conversation.

“I should be heading off now,” Ciel excused herself.

“Are you going to do some sword swings?” Vermouth asked.

“Yes,” Ciel nodded.

“If it’s alright with you, would you like me to take a look at your swings?” Vermouth offered.

“Of course, I’m alright with that,” Ciel said, getting up from her chair with a bright smile. “Since you’ve listened to me talk and offered to look at my sword swings, does that mean I can assume you’re cheering me on, Uncle?”

“We’re family, after all,” Vermouth said, returning her smile with his own as he also got up from his chair. “You should head over to the training grounds first. I’ll be there right after I’m done changing.”

“Alright!” Ciel cheered, as she quickly spun around and left the study.

Vermouth, who was left on his own once more, muttered to himself as he picked up the book that he had placed on the desk and returned it to its place on the bookshelf, “Really now....”

In his previous life, Hamel hadn’t been very popular with women. That was because he had a violent personality, a rough tongue, and a face covered in scars. Sienna and Anise, who had both spent a long time fighting alongside him as comrades, had developed feelings for Hamel, but from a general perspective, Hamel wasn’t really the type to be popular with women.

But nowadays....

“To think that he would be reincarnated with such a handsome face,” Vermouth sighed ruefully.

Of course, Ciel’s feelings for Eugene weren’t just because of his handsome appearance, but his looks must have also played a bigger role in her infatuation. Especially when one took into account the fact that the hundreds of boxes of love letters that had to be burned at the Lionheart main estate every single day were all due to Eugene’s heroics and handsome face.

“It seems that you also have a lot to repent for, Hamel,” Vermouth said, shaking his head as he left the study.

1. The word Ciel uses here specifically translates to the older brother of your father. ☜

2. Again, in Korean, this term specifically applies to the elder brother of your father, so while Gilead does have two younger brothers, Ciel wouldn’t be able to use this specific term to address them. ☜

3. The word that Vermouth uses has a complex etymology. It’s a very archaic insult that carries the implication of the person being a useless person, an executioner, or a bastard. ☜

4. This refers to when Kristina slapped her for acting pathetic. ☜



Openbookworm & DantheMan's Thoughts

OBW: Should we have a poll on which of Eugene’s many gifts was his greatest inheritance? Agaroth’s divinity, Hamel’s relationships, or Vermouth’s good looks?

Momo: I will vote for looks ;) Who doesn’t like to admire good looks? ;)