Monster no Goshujin-sama - Volume 10 - Chapter SS

Extra Story: A Novice as a Girl ~Shiran’s POV~

On an evening a short while after Travis’s Fourth Company of the Holy Order had attacked...

“Oh. Shiran. Found you.”

I turned from the conversation I was having in the living room to the voice that had called me. Lily came in from the hallway with a carefree smile. Her eyes then shifted to my conversation partner.

“Sorry for interrupting your chat, Dennis.”

“It’s all right. We just finished,” Dennis replied politely.

He already knew Lily’s identity, but there was no disdain or fear in his voice. His face only expressed his honest gratitude for being saved.

“Well then, Lady Shiran, I will excuse myself here,” Dennis said, turning back to me and bowing. “I apologize for taking up your time with such idle chatter.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t meet your expectations,” I replied.

“It’s fine. I understand your position. You’ve convinced me.”

Dennis left with a smile. After glancing at him as he passed her, Lily looked at me, curious.

“Umm, was it something serious?” she asked. “Oh, it’s fine if you don’t tell me.”

“No, it was nothing like that.”

She was trying to be considerate, but there was no need.

“It was nothing, really,” I said, lightly waving my hand. “Dennis asked me to be the village chief.”

“Hmm. The chief, huh...? Hey! That’s super important!” Lily exclaimed, her eyes wide.

“So he requested, but I refused,” I said, smiling bitterly.

“Oh. You refused. Now that you mention it, it did seem that way at the end there. But why not accept?”

“It doesn’t make sense to begin with. Kei is the family heir.”

Had he not died so young, my brother would’ve served as the chief. As his daughter, Kei was the legitimate heir. She wasn’t all that much younger than me either, so I wasn’t going to needlessly invite chaos.

“Besides...even if she wasn’t, I would’ve refused. I don’t have the confidence that I can fulfill the duties of a chief.”

“Is it that hard a job?”

“No, not in that sense. It’s true that the job of a village chief isn’t easy, but I was speaking more from a point of sincerity.”

“What do you mean?”

“Right now, before all else, I am Takahiro’s knight.”

I’d already sworn an oath for how I would conduct my life, and a knight’s oath held priority above all else. That said, I still considered everyone from Kehdo my precious brethren, so I wouldn’t make light of their feelings. That remained as it always had been. In addition, I was convinced that Takahiro would pay due consideration to Kehdo. However, in this case, that wasn’t the main problem.

“The chief must think of the village above all else. As I am now, I can’t fulfill that duty. To take on that responsibility would be insincere to the villagers.”

“Aah. That’s what you meant,” Lily said after blinking and letting out a sigh. There was an impish light in her attractive eyes. “That’s, like, how do I put it? Some serious bragging about your love life?”

“M-M-M-My...” I was speechless and stunned. “N-No. L-Lily. Th-That isn’t what I meant. I mean...”

I tried to make excuses, but I couldn’t even speak properly.

“Hee hee. I know. It was a joke,” Lily said, smiling.

“Th-That’s fine, then...”

I sighed with relief. I’d only recently acknowledged that I was also just a girl, and this was my first time being in love. I had very little experience, and that was on full display now. Responding with a light joke of my own would’ve been fine, but I couldn’t manage that. I pulled myself back together, then tried to get the conversation back on track.

“In any case, with the village in this state, we were discussing what to do if we were to rebuild. If we do, I’m planning to support the village from the outside.”

Even as Takahiro’s knight, there were things I could do for the village. In fact, there were many things I could do with the freedom to move about outside. I’d refused Dennis’s proposition, but I planned on granting his wish in another form. I’d conveyed this to him too, and he’d understood. That was when Lily had entered the room.

“Now that I think of it, what did you come here for, Lily?”

“Oh, right,” she said, clapping her hands as she remembered. “It overlaps a bit with what we were talking about. Leah has decided on her plans, so I came to tell you.”

“Auntie? Meaning...”

“Mm-hm. She’ll be going back to Rapha for a bit tomorrow.”

“I see. Thank you for informing me.”

The village was currently in a bit of a lull. The wounded were stable, and we’d sorted things out to the point where they could live normal lives. It was hard to imagine Travis launching another attack with the large majority of his subordinates dead too. Using that time, my aunt was considering whether to return to Rapha.

Her goal was to consult my uncle Melvin about what to do with Kehdo. Furthermore, she planned to contact the Akerian royal family through the army stationed at Diospyro. This incident concerned all of Aker, and normally, the royal family should’ve dealt with it. Takahiro had simply done so in their stead. We needed to exchange information, and if possible, move toward getting their cooperation.

Also, we had to inform the country of the village’s state and request aid. The choice of whether to revive the village, like we’d been discussing, or abandon it and migrate the survivors to Rapha, would largely depend on whether the country provided aid. Strictly speaking, we couldn’t move until that decision was made.

“It will take time to contact the royal family,” I said. “I suppose it’s prudent to move quickly.”

“Yup. Also, even if we make contact, it’ll still take time to get things settled. I guess we’ll be staying here doing what we can in the meantime.”

“I’ll have to ask that you all safeguard the village during your stay,” I said, sighing. “It pains me to rely on you for so much, but there’s no other choice. I have no idea how I can possibly repay you...”

“Aah, none of that, Shiran. You’re acting like you’re a stranger to us,” Lily said with a pout. Though her gesture was childish, her eyes admonished me. “My master doesn’t think that way either.”

“You’re right...”

I nodded in earnest. I had a bad habit of acting that way. I knew this, but I couldn’t stop myself. I was grateful that Lily had pointed it out like this.

“I’ll be careful,” I said.

“Mhm.”

Lily smiled gently. She was the eldest sister among Takahiro’s servants, so there was a certain air of magnanimity behind her expression. In a sense, I was also her little sister. I’d never thought of it that way before, but now I didn’t deny being a monster. In other words, I also wanted a connection to Lily and the other girls. I’d spent the last few years as Kei’s guardian and acted like her older sister, but I’d spent my childhood being a little sister, so this felt nostalgic.

“Also, about Leah’s escort,” Lily added, “my master decided that Lobivia and I will tag along. Lobivia complained a little, though.”

“It means being separated from Takahiro for a while, after all. If only I could go myself.”

“Don’t worry about it. As you are now, you can’t leave my master’s side.”

It wasn’t to the extent of Asarina, who was a parasite in his body, and Salvia, who’d joined with him as part of their contract, but I also depended on Takahiro now. I’d be fine for a few days without any fighting, but in order to prepare for the worst, I needed to stay by his side.

“You could get weaker if you leave him, but conversely, you’re the strongest among us so long as you’re by his side. It’s just for a few days, but I’ll be away, so I’ll need you to be with him.”

The strongest fighters in our little group were Lily, Gerbera, and myself. Gerbera’s strength was stable at all times. My strength was temporary, boosted with the support of my contracted spirits and my power as an undead monster. Lily had the breadth to deal with many kinds of enemies and situations, and she excelled at dealing a single tremendous blow with a giant surge of mimicked monsters. It was the right choice to have Gerbera and me stay behind. I understood the logic behind this, but...

“What’s wrong, Shiran?” Lily asked. “You’re making a weird face.”

“I don’t know how to put it. I just...feel a little awkward.”

“Awkward? What about?” she asked, wide-eyed.

“Because staying by Takahiro’s side, um...makes me happy.”

A beat later, Lily nodded in understanding. “Ooh. You feel awkward because it’s awfully convenient for you? Come on, you don’t have to care about that.”

“But, Lily...”

“Oh, I’m not trying to be considerate or anything, just so you know. I mean, I don’t like the idea of leaving my master’s side either, but I plan on having him make it up to me.”

“Make it up, you say?”

“Tee hee. Having an excuse to make him dote on me is actually a plus, you know?”

A smile took shape over her lovely features. She looked so happy, as though her mimicry could come undone at any moment.

“I see...”

In that sense, I’d been too anxious about the situation. I had no idea what she was planning to ask of him, but I had a feeling that it would be a lot of work for Takahiro. I was a little worried, and also...a little jealous.

I’d confessed my love, but I couldn’t get intimate with Takahiro unless I used resupplying my mana as an excuse. Part of me wanted to be more assertive like Lily was, but I had no idea how to go about it. I always ended up being so indecisive. The courage I needed to fight in battle as a gallant knight was different from the courage I needed as a girl. The thought brought a sigh to my lips.

Before I knew it, I realized Lily had been staring at me.

“Is something wrong?” I asked.

“Nope. Nothing,” Lily answered with a shake of her head. It felt like there was something, but she wasn’t going to say it. “At any rate, Shiran, if you’re gonna be like that, then I’m a little worried.”

“What do you mean?”

“About how you said you feel awkward and all. It’s ’cause you’re so reserved. Don’t hold back when it comes to asking my master for mana, okay? There’s no need to do so when you need blood, of course, but I mean for making out too.”

“I-I won’t...”

She said it so frankly to my face that I felt a little shaken. Not that I was lying. I’d just recently caused everyone a lot of trouble due to a mana shortage. Now that I’d settled my feelings about being a monster, I had no intention of repeating the same mistake. As a matter of fact, I’d already mustered my courage and asked Takahiro for mana through a kiss.

“Oh, but now that I think of it...” I began.

“Hm? Did something happen?” Lily asked.

“Ummm... No. It doesn’t really have anything to do with holding back.”

“Whatever. Just tell me. I’ll give you any advice you need.”

I wondered if this was really all right, but feeling awkward about this kind of thing was another bad habit of mine. I remembered what Lily had told me and decided to go ahead and ask.

“Just as you know, my body produces no heat,” I started, still somewhat hesitant. “Therefore, um, whenever I touch Takahiro, I worry...it feels unpleasant for him.”

“I don’t think so,” Lily said after blinking a few times.

“Really?”

“Mm-hm. My master isn’t the type to care about that kinda thing,” she said with confidence, but then her expression turned pensive. “Well, I say that, but if it worries you, it worries you. You’ve got your own circumstances and all. Everyone has different things that bother them.”

Fully understanding my feelings, she sank into thought for a while.

“Oh!”

Her expression suddenly brightened; she’d apparently thought of something. She then smiled impishly. That bothered me, but before I could ask, Lily looked me in the eye.

“Resolving that is simple. In short—”

◆ ◆ ◆

“Shiran?” Mana greeted me as I opened the door, her childish face highlighted by curiosity. “Did something happen?”

“There was something I wanted to get,” I answered.

After parting ways with Lily, I dropped by the room Rose was using. Just as always, Rose had been talking with Mana while she worked. The two of them really did get along well.

“I’m glad you’re here too, Mana,” I said. “I was hoping you could help me look for something. Do you mind?”

“Not at all. What is it?”

Mana managed our luggage over the course of our journey. It was faster to just ask her when looking for something specific.

After she got what I asked for, Rose looked down at the goods. “A tub meant for bathing and a runestone?”

“Yes. May I borrow them?”

“Please, go ahead,” Rose said pleasantly. “I have several spares. You may even keep them. It’s rare for you to use these, though.”

“It is,” I agreed.

It was true; I pretty much never bathed. If I needed to, I managed with cold water. I didn’t have to worry about catching a cold anymore, and a hot bath didn’t bring any pleasure, seeing as there was no blood circulation in me to improve. Nevertheless, I’d dropped by to retrieve these because of Lily’s suggestion. If my body was cold, then I could simply warm it up from the outside. It was so simple a solution that I wondered why I’d never thought of it before.

To that end, these tools Rose had created were very convenient. With a little mana, I could draw a bath just a little hotter than normal body temperature. I could use magic myself, but using magic tools that made the adjustment for me was far easier. In any case, I didn’t normally use these, so it drew their attention.

“Did something happen?” Rose asked. She quickly glanced at me, but she couldn’t spot anything. “It doesn’t look as if you’ve gotten dirty.”

I only wanted to heat up my body, but it was embarrassing to admit that when it was all for a kiss.

“I have a sudden need for it, is all,” I answered, dodging the question and turning on my heels. “Then, please excuse me. I have business with Takahiro.”

With that, I quickly started to leave the room.

“With my master...?” Rose muttered curiously.

“I’ll explain it to you later, Rose,” Mana said.

She’d apparently realized my intentions and would take my place explaining things. That was embarrassing too, but it was better than saying it myself. Honestly, I had no idea how Mana figured it out. Admiring her usual wisdom, I passed through the door, when I heard Mana’s voice once more.

“Good luck!”

“Huh?”

I didn’t understand, but by that time, the door had already closed behind me. I found it strange, but not enough to go back inside and ask. Besides, it would be uncomfortable if I got stuck having to explain things.

Deciding not to worry about it, I carried the bathing set I’d gotten from Rose and hurried back to my own room.

◆ ◆ ◆

After filling the large tub with hot water, I submerged myself inside it. I then added as much water as the tub could hold and soaked as much of my body as possible. In truth, I couldn’t feel myself warming up. I didn’t have much of a sense for heat. The reason I could feel body heat from others was likely that, as an undead, I was mistaking life force, mana, or the like for warmth instead.

Hot, cold, warm, chilly—these concepts were foreign to me now. There’d been a time when this change would have stressed me, but thinking back on it now, maybe that had been another reason I’d avoided taking baths. Now that I had overcome those hurdles, I didn’t mind. Actually, I was focusing on something else entirely.

“I’m covered in scars...”

I ran my fingers over the right side of my face. I could feel the scar carved into my skin. After I turned into an undead, my wounds healed immediately without leaving a trace, but the scars from before still remained. During the battle at Fort Tilia, my left arm had been cut off, my waist had been torn open, and a sword had been thrust in between my breasts. All of these wounds had left large scars across my body. There were many other scars from my days fighting in the Woodlands too.

As a knight, I didn’t care. I even felt proud of them. They were proof that I’d protected what was dear to me to the end. As a girl, however, I felt differently about them. What would Takahiro think if he saw these?

I was sure he wouldn’t pay them any mind, and Lily had said so too. He wasn’t the type to worry about such things. I knew that. I really did. But, even so, I couldn’t help but worry, and my mood turned melancholic.

As those thoughts filled my mind, I suddenly started questioning what I was even thinking and got embarrassed. Regardless, that was what it meant to show one’s body. I was afraid I was going to start imagining very specific things, so I drowned out my thoughts in a panic. My heart was a mess. I still wasn’t used to being a girl.

“This should be enough...”

Judging that I’d been in the bath for an adequate amount of time, I got out and quickly finished my preparations. I didn’t don my usual knight outfit, and instead put on a feminine dress. I did keep my sword with me, though. I couldn’t calm down without it, and I had to be prepared just in case. My appearance looked unbalanced with it, but this was my identity.

As I was getting ready, Kei returned to our room.

“Oh. You’re rather late,” I said.

“Umm, I was talking with Lobivia.”

“Is that so? It’s nice that you’re getting along. Oh, right. I just happened to use the bath, so feel free to use it next.”

“Oh, look at that. Maybe I will... Huh? But why?”

Kei had the same suspicion as Rose, but since I’d just finished my preparations, I started to leave the room.

“Well then, after you finish bathing, be sure to get some sleep before it’s too late. I have some business with Takahiro right now.”

“With Takahiro...?” Kei cocked her head. She looked at me, at the hot water in the tub, and back at me again. Her face turned noticeably red, then she darted toward me. “R-R-R-R-R-Really?! Finally!”

“Huh? Finally...?”

“Oh! But in that case, shouldn’t you pretty yourself up a bit more?! I have some cute things you can use!”

Kei huffed in determination. She was acting a little strange, but with her so excited, I had no room to cut in. If she were acting like this as a squire, I’d have had to warn her about it, but Kei seemed very girly right now. In the time I spent hesitating over how to deal with this, she’d already sprung into action.

“Here! This!”

“A...ribbon?”

I was perplexed by what she pulled out of her luggage. It was a beautiful large ribbon. I’d never worn anything like it before. For me, ornaments were basically just magic tools in the shape of rings, bracelets, and the like. Even I could admit that those had no sex appeal whatsoever, but the important thing was practicality and durability.

“I’m sure this will suit you,” Kei said.

“But...”

“I’ll put it on for you!”

It was no good. My words were falling on deaf ears. Her usual courteous mannerisms were gone, and she was now acting very much like a girl her age. That said, maybe I didn’t rebuke her because her suggestion had rocked my heart somewhat. If I was going to go see Takahiro, then it would be better to dress up more. I wanted to, and it felt kind of good to think of it like that.

“Very well...”

Kei looked like she was having fun too, so I decided it was fine to let her do as she liked sometimes. I relaxed my body and left it to her.

◆ ◆ ◆

After spending some time dressing up, I found myself standing in front of Takahiro’s room. I could feel the unfamiliar weight of the ribbon Kei had tied at the back of my head. It was a strip of fabric, inconceivably light compared to a sword, but its weight mysteriously drew my mind all the more. I nearly reached back to touch it on reflex, but I stopped when I remembered that Kei had arranged it for me. I hated the idea of messing it up.

I took a deep breath. The undead didn’t need to breathe, but habits that had been ingrained in one’s body for years didn’t break so easily. I mustered all my courage and knocked on the door.

“Is now a good time, Takahiro?” I called.

“Shiran? Sure, come on in,” he replied immediately.

“Excuse me.”

My preparations were perfect. I took a step into the room. It seemed he’d been inspecting his equipment, because he stood at a small table, his bracers and a knife sitting atop it.

“Did you need something?” he asked. “If you’re looking for Leah, Lily was...”

Takahiro paused, and an unnatural silence filled the room. His eyes were fixed directly on me. Did I look strange in some way? I was panicking like mad on the inside, but I remained casual as I looked myself over.

Mm. Nothing out of place...I think. Warm steam rose from my skin. I’d heated myself to the core. I’d feared that drying my hair would cool me down after going through the trouble to get warm, so it was still a little damp. I’d combed it, so I didn’t think it looked unsightly.

“Did you take a bath...?” Takahiro finally asked.

“Huh? Yes, I did.”

My reply came a beat late because, in my head, I’d simply been warming up my body. In a sense, it wasn’t all that different from putting cold soup on the fire, but now that I thought about it, it was the same as regular bathing.

“I used one to warm myself up.”

“I see. That’s...unusual.”

His reaction felt a little strange. Takahiro seemed puzzled. He looked bewildered, and maybe a little embarrassed too. However, if that was the case, what was making him bewildered and embarrassed? I couldn’t think of anything, so perhaps I was misreading him.

“Is something the matter?” I asked.

“No. Nothing.”

Takahiro intentionally coughed, lightly shook his head, and mouthed, “It can’t be,” to himself.

“So? What did you need?” he asked, acting as he usually did.

It was embarrassing to be asked that, but I’d gone down this path once already. I clenched my fists and left everything to momentum—not that I was able to eradicate my embarrassment by doing so.

“U-Um, I was thinking of asking...for a mana resupply.”

“A resupply...?” Takahiro repeated, his face stiffening.

“Y-Yes.” He wasn’t asking for clarification, and that only made me more embarrassed, but I forced myself to continue. “That’s why I made these preparations.”

“By bathing?”

I abruptly realized that my explanation wouldn’t make any sense to him, seeing as he didn’t know the specifics, but too much time had passed. My mind wasn’t functioning properly because of my nervousness and embarrassment. Thus, Takahiro obviously misunderstood.

“Should...I also take a bath?” he asked.

“Huh? No. Why?”

“Uh? Why...?”

Takahiro froze in confusion. We looked at each other, both bewildered. We seemed to be talking at cross-purposes.

Incidentally, looking back on this moment, none of it was Takahiro’s fault. I’d been careless, through and through. It was easy to understand Takahiro’s perspective after I thought it over. I’d visited the room of a man I was intimate with late at night. Not only that, but I’d gone out of my way to take a bath beforehand, something I didn’t normally do. And then, I’d asked for a resupply of mana—for his body fluids—and had informed him I’d taken a bath for that purpose. It didn’t need to be said what kind of misunderstanding this would invite.

Shortly after that, we unraveled the misunderstanding. Or rather, I realized my grand failure—a more accurate way of describing my state of mind.

“Aaaagh...” I groaned incomprehensibly. My entire body trembled. Every fiber of my being was embarrassed. “What a thing to do...”

I staggered, lowering myself onto the edge of the bed, but I failed to support my weight and had to place both my hands on the bed as well. That was how shocking this all was.

“Y-You mistook this for a night call...?” I muttered.

Now that I considered my behavior, it was reasonable to interpret it as a bold move. Actually, any other interpretation would have been strange. And yet, I only just came to this realization. It wasn’t that I lacked this type of knowledge or anything. There were more men than women in the Third Company, so I’d heard plenty of vulgar jokes. However, during that period, I’d considered myself no more than a knight, so I’d regarded such things as utterly unrelated to me. Now that I acknowledged myself as a girl, all of that came back to me.

“That was so immodest...” I mumbled.

“Um, I mean, honestly, I thought it was weird too,” Takahiro said, trying to console me. “You seem like a late bloomer, and you give off more of a refined impression. Besides, I couldn’t sense anything of the like in your expression or through the mental path. And, above all else, it was too sudden.”

He’d put it that way to be considerate, but it pointed out how my behavior and actions had been utterly mismatched. I could see how that would invite confusion.

“I apologize for being such a bother...” I said, my shoulders slumping.

“You’re exaggerating. I was just a little surprised.”

“It wasn’t just you. Rose and Mana also... Ah!”

I let out a small shriek as I recalled Mana’s baffling words and Kei’s mysteriously excited state.

“Oh yeah, you said you took a bath, huh?” Takahiro said sympathetically, guessing what had happened based on my reaction. “Did they misunderstand too?”

“It seems that way...”

Mana had definitely misunderstood. Rose, who was even denser than I was when it came to romantic sensibilities, likely hadn’t understood what was going on at all. Mana was going to explain it to her afterward, though. My consciousness faded away at the thought. And then there was Kei. I finally understood why she’d been cheering me on.

“I must apologize, Takahiro. Forgive me. I need to clear things up with Mana, Rose, and Kei...”

I staggered back to my feet, but unexpectedly, Takahiro grabbed my arm.

“Hang on a sec,” he said.

“Ah...”

With my focus elsewhere, he easily pulled me back. After that, I felt the warmth of human skin. For a moment, I had no idea what was going on. The instant I figured it out, it felt like my blood was burning, even though I had none.

“T-Takahiro?!”

I found myself in Takahiro’s embrace as he sat on the bed.

“Oh, you really are warm.”

I heard his amused voice right next to my ear. I felt the heat of his arms around me. It was the heat of a living being, a warmth that didn’t require an external source like I did. I’d come here to ask for mana—for a kiss—but this was still too sudden for me. It didn’t feel bad, of course. Not in the least. That was exactly why I was so stiff.

“I’m sure you’re planning on correcting the misunderstanding right away, but calm down a little,” he said. I couldn’t possibly calm down, though. I merely remained still and continued to listen to him. “Rose doesn’t need any clarification, but Katou might be sleeping. Kei too. If you’re going to talk with them, you should wait until tomorrow.”

“Oh. That’s...true.”

A fair amount of time had passed since I dropped by Takahiro’s room, so it wouldn’t be strange for them to be asleep already. It also wasn’t a good reason to wake them up.

“Sorry, Takahiro.”

I wanted to shrink away. I’d panicked so much that I hadn’t realized something so simple. I’d never done anything so careless in all my years as a knight. I’d always acted with discipline, but acting like any other girl was much different. I couldn’t control my emotions.

“I feel like I’ve been hopeless around you all this time,” I said.

“Maybe so,” Takahiro agreed, but he didn’t sound disappointed. “But that’s fine, right?” On the contrary, he seemed happy. “You’re cool and gallant as a knight, but right now, you’re very cute. I really like it.”

It felt like my heart would stop, but that was merely a hallucination. My heart had stopped beating long ago. His words had just caught me off guard to a surprising degree. I knew Takahiro had no ulterior motives. He’d simply stated that something was pretty or cute, like one might comment about a flower. It wasn’t meant as a pickup line or anything, but I was growing more hopeless by the second. It was like I was gradually getting worse and worse, yet better and better at the same time. It was an inexplicable feeling.

As a knight, this was all unfamiliar to me, but as a girl, I knew it was fine. Just maybe, falling in love meant becoming a hopeless wreck. The knight in me sensed this, but when it was just the two of us, this was okay.

I wasn’t a wreck; I was in love with him. I’d panicked and acted rather unbecoming, then basked in happiness from the smallest things. All of it felt so dear to me.

Before I knew it, our lips were touching. Takahiro looked a little surprised, so I’d probably been the one to make a move. The thought of resupplying my mana had completely slipped my mind. I clumsily matched the contours of our lips, and a sweet sensation filled me to the very tips of my fingers, but it wasn’t enough. That intense feeling drew me into him much, much deeper.

I left everything to the flow of this sweet sensation and thought of nothing but him.