Cooking with Wild Game (LN) - Volume 25 - Chapter 5.3

3

It was now the following day, and once again, Chiffon Chel found herself tediously sitting there in the antechamber, surrounded by stone walls. Lefreya did not receive many visitors, and she also rarely ever left her room, so Chiffon Chel’s job typically only consisted of assisting the young lady with her morning bathing and delivering her two daily meals, along with brewing the occasional pot of tea.

In the past, she had been tasked with handling the washing, preparing banquet attire, and the like, so she had hardly ever had any time to rest, but in a way, it had been easier to constantly move around like that than it was to constantly stay still. Ever since Chiffon Chel had become Lefreya’s personal maid, her days seemed to be twice as long.

“When the other maids, have no work to do, they embroider and the like,” Sanjura called out, as he was also present in the room, relaxing. He, too, spent most of his time in the antechamber, unless either Lefreya called for him, or he was practicing his swordsmanship out front.

“Even if I did embroider something, what would I do with it?”

“I’m not sure. Wear it yourself, or give it to someone else, I suppose. I am a man, so I can’t say I really understand.”

“I see.”

She had spent a rather large amount of time with Sanjura by this point, but she still didn’t know the man very well. All Chiffon Chel knew was that Lefreya was more precious to him than anything. She didn’t even know why the young lady was important to him, or what sort of relationship he wished them to have. He just seemed to want to be by Lefreya’s side, and he polished his swordsmanship in order to protect her.

“Chiffon Chel, it feels like, you’ve been listless lately,” Sanjura added. “And after what happened yesterday, you seemed even more down. Are you worried, about your brethren?”

“No, I wouldn’t go so far as to call it worry.”

Their conversation didn’t carry on any further than that. Even after a day, Chiffon Chel still hadn’t been able to sort out her feelings. Whenever she thought about her brother and the others, her heart started beating faster, but asking herself if she was worried for their safety always gave her a feeling like that was not the reason.

The settlement at the forest’s edge was a dangerous place. She didn’t know just how dangerous it was, but at the very least, she had heard that the giba that lived in the forest of Morga were ferocious beasts. If slaves bound with chains were attacked, it would be all too easy for them to lose their lives. But if the people of the forest’s edge were lending their aid, there was no point in Chiffon Chel worrying herself any further. In fact, she even wondered if dying would actually be such a terrible thing, if the worst were to happen.

No matter how long slaves lived, they would still remain slaves. They didn’t get whipped much in this land, and they were given plenty of food and sleep, but that didn’t change the fact of what they were. They had no freedom to act as they pleased, they weren’t paid wages, and they weren’t even permitted to give birth. What difference did it make, really, if one were to die early, when the alternative was a life of being worked until you could work no more? That was how Chiffon Chel saw it.

Her situation wasn’t so terrible that she wanted to die, but she wasn’t happy enough to have an active desire for her life to continue either. That was how the people of Mahyudra lived in this land. And Chiffon Chel had been painfully aware of that even before she had been separated from her brother and the others.

With her heart starting to beat faster again for some reason, Chiffon Chel looked up and stared at Sanjura. “Sanjura...before you were assigned to Lady Lefreya, the previous head of the house had you travel to various places around the country, did he not?”

“Yes, that’s right.”

“In that case...did you see northerners being used as slaves elsewhere too?”

“Yes, many times. But it was not very often, that I was sent to places, far from Genos. Northern slaves are common, farther to the north,” Sanjura said with a kind smile. But in spite of his expression, it was difficult to tell what he was truly thinking. He wasn’t expressionless like a citizen of Sym, but his smile still seemed to obscure his feelings a lot of the time.

“How were the northerners treated in those lands?” Chiffon Chel asked all the same. It had been quite some time since she had spoken because there was something she personally wanted to talk about, rather than just for work—possibly not since she last spoke with Asuta.

“Well, I did not approach, too closely, so I cannot say for certain...but they were usually, bound with chains, and made to work in fields. I also saw them, chopping wood, and in quarries.”

“I see.”

But then Sanjura suddenly turned his gaze up toward the ceiling. It looked as if he had just remembered something. “Now that I think about it...I forget the name, of the town, but there was one time, that I saw something rather unusual.”

“Something unusual?”

“Yes. A pregnant northerner.”

Chiffon Chel gave a small gasp, but then she quickly rethought the conclusion she had jumped to and shook her head. “Westerners hate northerners, so I doubt this would happen very often...but considering how the older women among our group were sold off to another land for some reason, what you saw could have been a mixing of northern and western blood.”

“Yes, I thought the same thing, but that was not, the case.”

“It wasn’t?”

“Correct. I did not speak with her, so I do not know for certain...but the pregnant woman, looked profoundly happy,” Sanjura said, smiling once more. “There were several women cooking, for a group of men. And the other women, were congratulating the pregnant woman. They would not do that, if the father was a westerner, correct?”

Chiffon Chel wasn’t sure what to say to that.

“I have mixed blood, from the east and west. My mother, was separated from her family, and ended up living as a westerner. She was very gentle, but seemed to suffer greatly. Because my father commanded it, it was decided that I would be, a child of the western god.” The same smile still on his face, Sanjura’s eyes narrowed nostalgically. “That’s how it usually goes, even with friendly nations like, the east and west. A child between, the north and the west, would not be received happily. In fact, the other women, would find it difficult, to do so.”

Chiffon Chel still said nothing.

“However, I do not know if slaves, are permitted to have, children together.”

“This is just a rumor...but I’ve heard that some places in this country do allow such things.”

“I see. Then perhaps that, was one of those places.”

This discussion was making Chiffon Chel feel even more uneasy. Underneath her cold exterior, she could sense her emotions raging wildly—feelings that had been lurking inside ever since she had heard from Asuta that her brother was alive, and that were now growing more and more intense.

It was then that she heard the light sound of a bell ringing beyond the door. Lefreya was calling for her.

“Excuse me,” she said, bowing to Sanjura. Then she opened the door. Lefreya wasn’t on her usual couch, but was instead standing near the window. The little window was barred with latticework, which ensured that it would be impossible for someone to escape through it, even putting aside how difficult it would be to reach it. Additionally, this was the third floor, so no one would be able to meet with her in secret from the outside either.

“Do you want something, Lady Lefreya?”

“Yes,” Lefreya replied, but she didn’t move for a long moment. When she finally did, it was to slowly turn to face Chiffon Chel. “I wish to take a bit of a walk. Could you let Sanjura know as well? Once you do, I shall need you to help me change.”

“Understood. Please hold on a moment,” After passing the message along to Sanjura over in the antechamber, Chiffon Chel moved over to the wardrobe in the corner of the room. “Lady Lefreya, what sort of attire do you wish to wear?”

“Anything will do. Just make it as simple as possible.”

Chiffon Chel thought for a bit, then handed a pale yellow dress and a shawl with Sym-style embroidery over to Lefreya.

She began by removing the white robe Lefreya was wearing, exposing the even paler skin underneath, almost as white as that of a northerner. It must have been so pale because she had been stuck in this room for so long.

Chiffon Chel then smiled awkwardly when she realized that her own fingers had grown even whiter still. That was no surprise, as she had been confined within stone walls like these for much longer than Lefreya. Even before coming to this residence, the only chances she’d had to feel the sunlight on her skin were the times when a guest would ask her to show them around the garden.

But westerners have finer skin than northerners. It’s almost as if she is made of clay.

Now that she had turned twelve, her body was also steadily growing more feminine. Not that long ago, Lefreya had looked like nothing more than a young child, but at some point her body had gained some modest curves, and even a small amount of charm. The hair that she had chopped off to atone for her crimes had regrown until it was almost shoulder-length now, and her nose and cheeks also looked a bit less childish. She was like a flower bud that was about to bloom and reveal its beauty.

If she grows into a fine woman, takes a husband, and transfers control of the family to him, perhaps then Lady Lefreya will be able to live more freely than she does now.

Chiffon Chel neither pitied nor hated Lefreya. The young lady had been quite hot-tempered in the past, but her behavior had seemed almost cute when compared to the things Ciluel had done, and she, at least, had never whipped Chiffon Chel. Moreover, the way she started to shrilly cry out whenever she so much as thought about her father—the only family she had ever known—always made her seem very much like a small injured bird.

If you cannot leave it freely, even a sturdy stone house is no different than a cage. Lady Lefreya and I are both nothing more than caged birds, Chiffon Chel thought to herself as she put the yellow dress on Lefreya, then wrapped the embroidered shawl around her mistress. She had thought that the young lady would at least need some sort of hair accessory as well to complete her outfit, but Lefreya had flatly refused it.

After passing through the antechamber and exiting into the hallway, they found Sanjura standing next to two soldiers, who were there to escort them. The soldiers took up positions in front of and behind Lefreya, and their group then descended the stairs and stepped outside.

The residence was one that had been built for nobles to make use of as needed. Powerful nobles were able to build fine manors in the castle town for themselves, but knights and government officials typically lived in public housing complexes like this one, along with their families. Branch families of some noble houses like those of marquises and counts also tended to reside in such places.

To their right, they could see Genos Castle standing there in all its glory, but Lefreya turned her back to it and started walking toward the garden.

It was forbidden for her to leave the residence without permission from Torst. The place was surrounded by stone walls with vines hanging all over them, and the gate was guarded by soldiers. The garden was full of flowers some noblewoman had planted, and was wide enough for a totos to comfortably run around in it. It was currently the early afternoon, so there was no one else around at the moment.

As she walked along the stone path that ran around the perimeter, Lefreya eventually called out, “Sanjura, could you give us a bit of space? I would like to have a discussion.”

“A discussion? With whom?”

“Who else could I mean but Chiffon Chel?”

Chiffon Chel was shocked, but Sanjura just smiled. “Understood. I’ll have the soldiers, step back as well.”

The soldiers looked suspicious, but they were surrounded by stone walls, and there was no way she would be able to use Chiffon Chel to start any sort of conspiracy regardless, so Sanjura and the soldiers all walked ten or so steps away, deciding to keep watch from a spot where they couldn’t overhear the conversation.

“What is it, Lady Lefreya? What could you possibly have to discuss with one such as myself?”

Lefreya kept on silently walking for a short while, with Sanjura and the soldiers following them, always remaining the same distance away. Eventually, though, she opened her mouth around halfway through a lap around the large garden space.

“Chiffon Chel, a member of your family is being made to work in the Turan lands, correct? How exactly are you related to them?”

“He is...my older brother.”

Lefreya lightly bit her lip upon hearing that. Even though the two of them were still walking along the path, her gaze was directed down at her feet the whole time.

“But you were already working in our manor even back when I was little, were you not? How long has it been since you last saw your brother?”

“I started serving the count five years ago. I have not seen my brother or any of my other brethren since then.” Chiffon Chel had absolutely no idea why Lefreya wanted to know that, though.

In a depressed voice, the girl repeated, “Five years... So you were captured as slaves five years ago?”

“No. We lost our homeland thirteen years ago. We spent eight years elsewhere in Selva before being brought here to work in the Turan lands.”

Lefreya fell silent.

“Why are you asking about this? There’s nothing strange about westerners purchasing northerners as slaves.”

“But my father was the only one who used slaves here in Genos. No one else would ever go out of their way to purchase them this far south.”

“Yes. It takes over a month by totos to travel between Mahyudra and Genos, after all. Few would put in such time and effort.”

Lefreya stopped walking and looked up at Chiffon Chel’s face. She was raising her eyebrows, like she often used to do back when she had been a young tyrant. But now, her pale eyes were showing nothing but unease and sadness.

“Chiffon Chel, you must hate me and my father greatly. You were purchased and brought here as a slave, and then we ripped you away from your family too.”

“Hate you...? I wouldn’t say that. The soldiers who burned our home down, captured us, and made us slaves belonged to a distant part of this country that has nothing to do with Genos”

“But my father is the one who pulled you away from your family.”

What was going on here? Unable to understand Lefreya’s thinking at all, Chiffon Chel tilted her head.

“It’s true that my heart became hollow after I was separated from my brother. But if you’re asking me whether the two of us were happy back when we were working together, well...I don’t think I could answer that with a yes.”

“So, as long as you are slaves, your lives will be full of suffering regardless of whether or not your family is by your side?”

“Perhaps...? It’s hard to say for sure. At this point, it’s difficult for me to remember what my life was like before I was a slave.”

Lefreya pursed her lips tightly. That was also something she had often done in the past, but now she looked like she was holding back tears. “I have been separated from my father, the only family I have... But that was the result of the crimes he committed, so there is no one for me to hate. If he had not been a count, he surely would have lost his head after everything he did.”

“Yes.”

“But you didn’t commit any crimes at all, correct? And yet, you still had both your home and your family taken from you, so how can you say you don’t hate us for that?”

Chiffon Chel brought a hand to her chest and thought. Something was bubbling up deep within her frozen heart. However, she didn’t think that it was hatred.

“I do not feel hate. I probably lost the ability to hate other people a long time ago.”

“Then what am I supposed to do about this?” Lefreya asked, sounding like a spoiled child. Her eyes were starting to tear up a bit. “If you had said you wished to return to your brother, I could have told Torst to make arrangements to allow you to do so. But if that won’t bring you happiness...then I don’t know what else can I do to make this better.”

“Why... Why are you saying such things, Lady Lefreya?”

“Because nothing’s more precious than family, right? It’s absolutely unforgivable that we would tear your family apart when you haven’t done anything wrong?”

Lefreya had lost her entire family. But losing them had shown her how important family truly was, possibly for the first time in her entire life. Months ago, she had ordered two of her attendants to abduct Asuta and bring him to the castle town, where she kept him until a female hunter calling herself Asuta’s family saved him from that predicament. Lefreya herself had ripped an innocent man away from his family, and now she was crying at the thought of the pain she had caused. Was this also the will of the western god?

That indescribable emotion was growing stronger and stronger within Chiffon Chel’s chest. It almost felt as if her body was physically straining to keep it contained.

“Think it over again, Chiffon Chel. Don’t you want to return to your brother? Life in the Turan lands may be difficult for slaves, but at least you would be with your family there, right? Wouldn’t that make you at least a little happier?”

“I...”

“Or should we summon your brother to the castle town? That would be a little...no, quite difficult indeed, but if that is what you wish for, I shall petition Torst and Duke Genos to allow it to happen, even if I have to lick their boots to get them to agree.”

“Wh-Why are you so concerned about the fates of my brother and me, Lady Lefreya?” Chiffon Chel asked, losing her composure and trying to step back, only for Lefreya to grab ahold of both of her hands. There were now tears streaming down her smooth white cheeks. Lefreya was crying, despite looking angry at the same time.

“You and Sanjura are all I have now. I cannot bear the thought that tragedy has befallen one of you because of my father and me. I don’t want to lose you, but...more than that, I want you to be happy.”

“But...I am a slave who was purchased for coins.”

“That has nothing to do with it! To me, all that matters is that you’re my maid!”

Chiffon Chel could spy the soldiers stirring out of the corner of her eye, but they made no move to approach. Sanjura must have stopped them. She was utterly bewildered. It felt as if Lefreya’s intensity was causing the emotions swirling about in her chest to flare up in response.

“What can I do for you? What would bring you the greatest happiness? Ask me for anything, anything at all! I may not have any power left, but I wish to atone for my father’s crimes however much I can!”

“I... I have lost all human emotion... I can’t even tell happiness and misery apart anymore,” Chiffon Chel replied, squeezing Lefreya’s hands back. They felt so very, very small, and yet there was an incredible amount of warmth in them. “But thanks to you, Lady Lefreya, I finally realized... What I want most is to be human again, like you.”

“What do you mean? Say it in a way I can understand!”

“Right... I did not know if returning to my brother would bring me happiness...and I hated that doubting part of myself so much I could not stand it... I learned that he was alive and well, but I did not know if I should feel joy or sadness because of that. I hated myself, and the state of the world.”

A muddy stream burst through the cracks in Chiffon Chel’s frozen heart, but the ice was still holding together. Those thirteen years of hardening wouldn’t be broken through so easily.

Chiffon Chel didn’t feel anger, sadness, or joy, but she shouldn’t have just accepted that as fact. If she didn’t know what happiness was, she should have been doing everything she could to find out.

Like Asuta had done and Lefreya was trying to do now, she should have fought against the fate that had been thrust upon her as hard as she could. Rather than yielding to the flow of destiny, she wanted to grab ahold of as much happiness as she could. No... She wanted to regain enough of her human emotions to desire that in the first place.

“Lady Lefreya. What I want is for my brother and my brethren to live happy lives. And I wish to be happy myself as well.”

“Right... Then what should I do?”

“Well, there is no way that anyone from Selva would ever release us, even if they wished to do so. Northerners take westerners as slaves as well, so it would be pointless to ask to be the only ones freed. And as long as the war between our nations does not end, releasing slaves would be the same thing as aiding the enemy, which makes any kind of request like that impossible to grant.”

“Right.”

“But perhaps something can be done to allow northerners to live happily even in the western lands. I’ve heard that there are a few towns where some slaves are permitted to earn wages and have children. A number of slaves from those towns were sold to the Turan lands, but they found living here to be more than they could bear, so they tried to escape and were executed. I think that proves that they used to be happy enough that they were willing to risk their lives to get that happiness back, does it not?”

“Right,” Lefreya repeated with yet another nod. The young lady seemed to be desperately trying to understand what Chiffon Chel was trying to convey, and what she wanted.

“Travelers from all sorts of places gather here in Genos. I’m sure it would be possible to learn from them about why those other lands give slaves wages and allow them to have children. If managing slaves in that way is profitable, and Duke Genos could be made to see that...then perhaps the slaves of the Turan lands would also be permitted to live that way.”

“Is that your desire, Chiffon Chel?”

“Yes. My brother and the others lack the strength to flee the western kingdom at this point, so what choice do we have but to try to find happiness here?” Chiffon Chel asked, managing a natural smile. That was the first time she had smiled without having to make a deliberate effort to do so since she had said farewell to Asuta. “My brother and my other brethren have no way to make their words reach the ears of the nobles. But you are here by my side, Lady Lefreya, and you’ve already taken the huge step of promising to aid someone like me. I am the only northern slave in the whole world whose words can reach the nobles of Genos. I do not know if this is the right thing to do, or if it will bring us happiness. But if I am not happy now, then I want to do everything I can to become happy someday.”

“Naturally,” Lefreya replied with yet another nod. Her eyes were still filled with tears, but they were shining brighter now than ever before. “You are a slave from Mahyudra, and I am a noble in name only with no power whatsoever, but if we muster all our strength and think it through, perhaps we can find a way to shift fate ever so slightly. Torst, Duke Genos, and Polarth of the house of Daleim are the kind of people who will not balk at anything they believe will benefit Genos. If we use that fact to our advantage, then improving the lives of your brother and the others should be entirely possible.”

“Yes... But do you truly wish to expend such effort for one such as myself?” Chiffon Chel asked, causing Lefreya to smile with her eyebrows still raised. It was impossible to tell if she was happy, angry, or sad at this point.

“You and Sanjura are all that I have left. A mistress who cannot even look after two servants is more useless than a broken sword.” With that, Lefreya wiped away her tears with the back of one small hand, then used the other to grab ahold of Chiffon Chel’s hand and started walking. “With that decided, let us return to the room to plan. We’ll have to talk Torst into it first, and then perhaps we should make contact with Polarth... Ah yes, the swordsmanship tournament will be happening soon as well. I could speak with Duke Genos directly there, and his heir’s wife, Eulifia, has always paid an unusual amount of attention to me. We may be able to get things moving sooner if we approach the problem from that direction.”

“Lady Lefreya, please don’t act recklessly.”

“Why not? I’m just like a little bird that’s been kept beyond the end of its usefulness, so if I do not chirp as loud as I can, no one will ever look at me.”

Chiffon Chel ended up smiling again at the thought that she and Lefreya felt the same way about how they had been spending their days.

Only the gods could decide whether her frozen heart would ever break free, or if she and her brother would find happiness, but at least she had chosen a path forward for herself. She had nothing left to lose, and there was also someone else trying to walk that path alongside her. If the approach they were taking was the wrong one, then the western and northern gods could simply stand in their way and stop them.

Hundred of years had passed since Selva and Mahyudra started fighting. In all that time, had a western noble and a northern slave ever stood hand in hand like this before? As she pondered that thought, Chiffon Chel found herself smiling with more and more vigor.